People Share Their Victorious Moments Of Revenge
47. Rude Man In Line For Checkout Had To Wait Until I Finish Chitchatting With The Cashier
“I was at a craft store in my town, and it wasn’t too busy, but only one register was open. The cashier, a teenage girl, I could tell was working as best as she could. The process was a tad slower however because she had a stutter and a bit of a lisp.
As she worked through the line, asking the usual questions probably mandated by the big wigs (I’ve worked in retail, it’s a thing), the man behind me began to huff and puff. He muttered something about having places to go, he was in a hurry, etc. I ignored him until I heard him start to mock her to his kids.
‘W-w-would you l-like y-y-y-y-y-y-your reSCHKeet?’
The kids began to laugh. It really made my b***d boil. Especially since I could tell the cashier heard his mockery. That really made my b***d boil. When a person doesn’t respect retail employees as people, it’s the best way to tell whether a person is a jerk or not.
So, when it was my turn at the register, she asked me in a small voice, ‘Are you a member o-o-of the rew-w-rewards club?’ And I looked smugly at the guy behind me, and back at her.
Me: The rewards club? Oooo that sounds great!
Please explain it to me?
She seemed surprised at first, but then looked at the guy behind me, and then it clicked.
I have never given my information so slowly in my life. Never had I asked as many questions as I did. She smiled and answered my inquiries, while the guy behind me was seething.
Him: Can you hurry up, please?
Me: And miss out on these great rewards? As if!
I only held him up for about 5 minutes… but wooo child, it felt so good.”
46. Parents Made Friends With An Old Couple Who's A Bad Influence
“You know the scam. Whine about perfectly good food to get some sort of comp.
In their old age, my parents befriended another older couple who would pull this stunt everywhere they went.
After my mother told me a few stories about how their new friends had shown them how to get discounted or free meals, I felt like I was suddenly the responsible adult, concerned about the bad influence these people were on my parents.
While visiting my parents with my significant other, this other couple attended dinner with us.
As I expected, the food was brought to the table and they immediately began dramatically complaining to one another about the quality/taste/temperature/etc. They were making a scene in order to attract the attention of the waitress. When our waitress returned to ask how we were doing, the miserable old guy who played the lead role in their act took a deep breath, struck a dramatic pose (with his hand raised to begin gesticulating for emphasis), and began.
I leaned forward and cut him off before he could finish the first word: ‘Everything is absolutely fantastic. It’s all great! Thank you very much!’ She smiled and began her obligatory ‘Great, well if you need any–’ when he made a second attempt.
‘We come here all the time an–’. I didn’t acknowledge that he was speaking at all, repeated that all was just as we ordered, and thanked her again.
He was stunned and thrown off from his routine by my interruption. During this pause, the waitress walked away (it seemed clear that she knew what they were trying to accomplish).
He turned bright red. I turned to my girl and, smiling and without lowering my voice, stated how pitiful it is that some people could be dishonest, deceitful, and put at risk the livelihood of a cook, server, or hostess for a pathetic discount or a free early-bird special. My passive-aggressive reverse-parenting broke my parents of the habit in a short time.”
45. Disrespectful Campus Visitor Gets A Trip To The Grocery Store
“I work on a college campus.
It’s the season for orientation and parents are herding their kids around checking out the school. I misread my schedule (arrived at 14:00 instead of 4:00 pm) and had a few hours to kill. I decided to take a walk around campus to look at the changing trees.
I soon came upon a family who was clearly lost. Two parents and a kid. The dad’s got the map out (upside down) and the mom is asking anyone who will listen for directions. I decided to help.
I stroll up and ask where they’re headed and am told they’re looking for one of the libraries.
It wouldn’t be too far out of my way so I decided to take them there. As we’re walking, I make small talk asking what the kid plans to study and whatever. To be helpful, I started pointing things out on the way. This was my fatal error.
As we’re walking, someone interrupts and says ‘are you headed to the library?’ I confirmed that we were and allowed them to tag along. I didn’t go full tour guide and turn around, so as I’m walking, I remain facing forward. I didn’t notice that a few other families started following behind me.
We get to the library and the first family is happy. I turn to leave and someone says ‘how about the political science department?’ I check my clock and think “what the heck, these people are nice” and off we went. At this point, I have about five families with me.
People are asking questions and laughing at my jokes and having a good time.
We get to the next building and it’s time for me to leave for work. I motion to disband my little entourage and am met with opposition. ‘Take us to the English department.’ Some guy says.
I was like ‘no can do, chief. I gotta go to work’ and it clearly didn’t register. I tried to tell him that this was an informal tour and I’m not affiliated with the orientation and he didn’t understand. ‘What the heck kind of tour is this?
We paid good coin for this orientation. You’re going to take us to the English department!’ Imagine Mark Derwin’s character from Accepted. The English department was actually pretty far away so I wouldn’t be able to get him there without being late to work.
He was pretty disrespectful so I decided to dump him instead.
‘To get there it’s easiest to take a campus shuttle,’ I said ‘I’ll walk you to the bus stop.’ He was satisfied with that so off we went. We get to the bus stop and I tell him that I won’t be riding with him because I’m only a tour guide for this particular area.
Once he gets on the bus, he should wait for three stops, then get off and meet a new tour guide that will be there waiting. Instead of saying thanks, he grumbles out a ‘was that so hard?’ and climbs aboard.
Here’s the kicker.
Our campus doesn’t have its own bus system. I put him on a city bus. Three stops would take him to a grocery store a mile or two off-campus. There definitely wasn’t anyone waiting for him there. I like to think he got what he deserved for being disrespectful.”
44. Released 100 Crickets Around My Ex's House
“I like to end my relationships amicably. I am friends with a few of my exes. This one, however, has been weapons-grade scum to me for a couple of years and then threw me and my children out suddenly with nothing but the clothes on our backs and made a few choice death threats to me.
Don’t worry, the police are involved. Well, a few hours earlier, I went with a police escort to gather the rest of my and my children’s belongings. He was sitting on the couch with his new girl, both having had more than a few drinks.
The officer stayed with them. I went to what used to be our bedroom, packed my belongings quickly, packed my children’s things, then released 100 crickets under his bed, in his closet, in his dressers, and in what used to be the childrens’ bedroom. I made sure there were more male crickets than female, so they’ll be noisy while attempting to find a mate, and these little buggers will eat anything, wood, clothing, and they’re very good at hiding during the day.”
43. BMW Driver Hit His Head On The Roof After A Speedbump Because He Won't Stop Tailing Me
“I was driving to work a few months ago and getting close, I have two turns remaining until I turn into the building.
It is just a few blocks away. All side streets, no highways involved. This guy behind me is in a black BMW, and he is on my tail the whole time. I see him checking his phone, then making angry faces at me and getting closer and closer.
I speed up a bit, thinking it might calm him down. 5 over, nope. Anyway, I make the first turn and am now on the street where my building is, maybe 600 yards up ahead. The jerk is still behind me, driving inches from behind me and obviously annoyed that I am still going the speed limit, (maybe 35 on this street).
So I speed up a bit and see he does the same.
I drive an eight-year-old Toyota truck, not one of the big huge ones, but not one of the small ones. I do have all-terrain tires, and I have certainly driven through pastures, over rocks, and popped a curb or 10 in my time.
My suspension is in good shape and has no problem treating my decade-old truck like a truck.
Well, as I get closer to my building there is a large speed bump in the street, effectively getting people to slow down as they approach the parking garage entrances.
I look back and see a jerk still riding my bumper. I remember thinking to myself I need to slow down for this speed bump, and looking back and thinking, if I hit my brakes, this guy is going to hit me. The plan takes shape in my mind and I speed up.
I am doing about 45 when I hit that speed bump, and yeehaw. I did a bit of a jump and land, never once touching my brakes. Didn’t even tap them. I gave him zero warning for what was about to happen.
I am watching my rear-view window intensely during this because I wanted to see his reaction.
He was cradling his cell phone between his ear and shoulder when he hit. His hood bucked up behind me, then slams to the ground. I see him go flying out of his seat straight up. He slams his head on the roof of his BMW and his head rolls sideways from impact.
Then he slams back into his seat violently. He has a total ‘what the heck was that’ look on his face as he grabs the wheel with both hands to recover.
… and yes, he slowed right down after that.”
42. Spend 40 Dollars To Get Revenge On The Group Who Stole My Parking Space
“I took the family out to eat at Applebees.
The lot was full and I saw a customer come out to leave so I waited for him to pull out and take the spot. The guy pulls out and a car full of young girls just pulls into my spot. You know the type.
Well, I rolled down my window and told them I was waiting for that space and the driver says ‘too bad, your name wasn’t on it.’ I was livid but just waited for another space and went in and ate.
Girls were at the bar doing shots and getting wasted. We enjoyed our meal and paid the waiter.
I then asked the waiter if he wanted to make 20 bucks. I asked him to go up to the girls, 10 min after we left, and tell them they got a call from someone that said that they had keyed their car and that they should have parked somewhere else.
I DID NOT KEY THE CAR.
I called him about an hour later to ask how it went. He said they all went nuts, screaming, and even called the police.
BONUS: Cops came and found no damage to the car but noticed the girls were too damaged to drive.
Cops left and circled back and watched the car. Girls come out, get in the car, start the car, and the parking lot explodes in blue light. Busted! DUIs and PDs for all.
I did not know about the bonus till a week later when I went back for a few beers.
The waiter recognized me and told me the bonus story, laughing the whole time. Another 20 bucks to the waiter. Best 40 dollars I ever spent.”
41. Drew Markers On My Sister's Bully Friends During Sleepover
“When I was a tween and my sister had big sleepovers, I was allowed to have one person over to keep me company as well. I usually asked my cousin over, because she and I were around the same age and the only person I was really close with.
Things usually went pretty smoothly during the day, but come nighttime, my sister and her friends would begin pranking us mercilessly. Everything from putting our underthings in the freezer to putting shaving cream on us while we slept to popping out of random places and scaring us.
One night, we decided we had enough.
My sister had been warned earlier about the pranking after my cousin and I complained about it. We stayed up late, chugging soda to keep us going until all the older kids had fallen asleep. Then, we pulled out the markers and began drawing all over each other’s faces.
Smears of red and green and purple, we left no areas untouched. We even added little marker streaks to our pillows, to make it look like somebody’s hand had slipped while they were scribbling on our faces. Then we went peacefully to sleep and waited for the chaos to ensue.
Everything went as planned. Their pranks had been mostly harmless until now, they certainly never did anything that would stain or last more than a couple of hours. My sister and her friends were in deep trouble, and we got off scot-free.
The highlight of this story for me is a conversation from the following day between my sister and my grandpa:
Sister: But I didn’t do anything!
Grandpa: What? So we’re supposed to believe they did this to themselves?”
40. Exchanged Action Figures With Barbies For My Demanding Neighbors' Kids
“So I live next door to a couple (a VERY conservative couple) and their twin boys. The boys can’t be more than 8, and like most kids, they like to play in the backyard, which is totally fine, doesn’t bother me at all.
They’re kids and like to run around. What bothers me though is that they love to throw their toys over into my yard. A lot of toys. Action figures, balls, frisbees, rackets, etc.
Them throwing them over doesn’t even really bother me that much.
What bothers me is that the parents keep demanding that we have to throw them back. They don’t ask, they don’t knock on the door and apologize, they just yell over their fence when they know that we are outside and TELL us to give it back.
And that bothers me. They also seem to encourage their kids to throw it over to our yard.
So after Christmas, I was at the store and saw that they had a ton of Barbies, nail polish, Bratz doll frisbees, and balls on clearance.
I bought 5 of everything I could find that I knew my neighbors would hate seeing their sons play with. Every time an action figure gets thrown over to my yard, I will throw a Barbie back with it. Every time a ball gets thrown, a Bratz ball will be returned. I already threw a couple of nail polishes over and the twins went crazy.
They loved it. They’ve had pink, purple, and green nails all week.
It’s been 2 days and not a single action figure has crossed my fence. More importantly, not a single rude demand from the parents to return them. The kids are having fun, and I have petty revenge.”
39. Homeowners Association Won't Stop Bugging Me For My Team Flags In Every Sports Game
“So a while back, I was given a UGA Bulldogs flag and a flag pole to mount on my porch. Our Homeowners Association (HOA) restrictions say that sports team flags can only be flown on a day in which the team is playing. My intention was to only fly it on Saturdays when the football team was playing.
So I put the flag up on a Saturday the Dawgs were playing but forgot to take it down until Monday. On Friday, I get a letter from the HOA stating that I am in violation of the restriction and could be fined. Okay, fair enough, they are correct on this one.
I then noticed that the date of observation was on Wednesday. I called and said that couldn’t be true because I took it down on Monday. Instead of admitting her mistake, she lied and said that she had seen it up on Wednesday. Now I was mad.
I printed off a schedule of every sporting event the Bulldogs had in every sport, even club sports, and then proceeded to fly the flag every single day there was any kind of game, match, regatta, etc., which was almost every single day.
I then started getting letters stating I was in violation again.
I would call on each one and explain that the water polo team had a match, or the rowing team had a regatta on those days. After about a month or two of this back and forth, they finally gave up.”
38. The Whole Class WasLooking Off Of My Test Paper
“Years ago in my high school AP economics class, I was assigned to sit in the corner of the room where I was flanked by a handful of very popular, very lazy kids. After every exam, the teacher would announce (much to my chagrin) my ‘high score’ to the class.
After a particularly challenging exam where I only scored 93%, the teacher announced that the guy to my right (let’s call him Matt) had ALSO scored 93%, his friend behind him 90%, and the friend behind HIM 90%! Needless to say, I vacillated between self-doubt and suspicion for a few days before I finally ‘congratulated’ one of the 90%’ers on his score.
With an impish grin, he admitted that his friend Matt had been using my notes and papers for months and ‘thanked’ me for helping ‘so many people do so well’ in the class. The petty revenge gears started turning in my head for what seemed like ages before I replied ‘no problem, I’m just glad to help!’
At the next exam, I put my paper in a very clear view of Matt. He had been told that I was now willing to ‘help’ him and his friends. I circled all wrong answers while making a special mark for the correct ones.
Just before the time was up, I quickly changed my answers back when nobody was looking, turned in my exam, and smugly walked back to my seat.
What I didn’t know at the time was that the conspiracy didn’t just involve the kids sitting next to me, but that my answers were written down and forwarded to the next 4 periods, all of which took an identical test.
One week later a record 22 people failed the exam. Matt empathetically remarked, ‘Oh man, Accidentally_Upvotes, did you fail too!?’ I flipped over my sheet: 100%.
Nobody ever looked at my sheet that class again.”
37. Set A Spicy Sandwich Trap For The Guy Who Stole My Snack
“This happened a while back, study hall in 8th grade actually. I always brought two small sandwiches to school so I could have one at lunch and one in study hall since our teacher let us eat in that class. One day, as I was about to eat my sandwich, I get up to use the bathroom.
As I walk back into the classroom, I see the kid in front of me eating my sandwich. I was pretty annoyed but nothing serious at this point, so I confront him politely and he denies it completely. I left my sandwich on my desk the next day just to make sure it was him, and what do you know, it is.
So on the third day, I hatched a plan. I put habanero cheese on my sandwich and then doused it all in ghost pepper sauce. That stuff was everywhere, but it luckily didn’t smell spicy. I get to study hall and my plan works flawlessly.
I leave my trap sandwich on my desk and get up to use the restroom. This time, I take as long as I can and end up wandering the halls of the school. I did this because my study hall teacher was crazy about the hall pass, and only one guy was allowed to leave the class at a time, even for water.
After about ten minutes, I come back into the class to be greeted by the sandwich thief crying hysterically with a bright red face waiting for the hall pass. He was in the bathroom for the rest of the day.”
36. Jerk Restaurant Manager Treats His Young Waitresses Poorly
“I was around 17, living on my own, when I got a job as a waitress at a dumpy restaurant. The manager was a horrible man who would scream at and harass his staff. One day, I watched while he screamed at this poor young waitress, reducing her to tears.
I stood there calmly taking my break in the kitchen, eating a banana, looking at him, and thinking what a jerk he was. When he was done with her, he turned to me and made a filthy comment about young girls who liked bananas.
To which I replied, ‘I quit. This is my notice.’ He went really crazy then and told me to get out immediately. I said I would leave as soon as he paid me for the time I had worked that I hadn’t been paid for yet – two weeks.
He said he wasn’t paying me a penny and to get out.
So I got out — I sat on the front step in my uniform. Whenever a customer came up to the door, I related what a terrible person he was and the things he said to me, how he treated the staff.
After a little while, he came out and screamed he was calling the police if I didn’t leave. I said go ahead, I’ll tell them what you said to me and how you treat the young girls here. He went back in, came out 15 minutes later with a check.
I said I want cash. He went back inside and came back, very subdued and polite, and paid me cash. Maybe not the greatest revenge, but I got what was due me. For a young girl on her own, having to deal with crappy jobs and crappy employers, it felt really good.”
35. Girls Cut The Line For A Coffee Ended Up Outside Of The Rope
“On vacation, my significant other and I stop at the Louvre. There is a lineup at the little cafe/snack bar. They have those standing barriers with ropes to guide the lineup, but the ropes aren’t pulled across – because people are grown-ups and can see that it’s just a single line down one side of the front display.
Cue a group of young, mean girls in blinged-out clothes deciding they don’t have time to stand in line. They go to the front and stand behind the person currently paying. They pretend to be oblivious to the 4-5 other people in line now giving them death stares.
I am not in line but I see their little act. So I go along and start hooking up the ropes. The girls are gossiping together and ignoring everyone else around them, because hey, what do they care right? So they don’t notice when I move the barrier just a smidge forward … and hook up the rope in front of them.
The look on their faces when they turn around to order their coffees and find themselves quite obviously outside the queue was just… soooo priceless. Huffing and puffing, they had to totter their high-heeled selfs to the back of the (now much longer) line-up.
Enjoy your coffee, ladies!”
34. Officemate With Cancer "Died" Before Going To The Club
“It was this girl I worked with, she was jealous of girls who looked better than her, she would make passive-aggressive comments all the time, and I didn’t like her because she was doing it to me and a friend of mine.
She started talking to me one day while we were working overtime together and she revealed to me that she has cancer and is taking chemo. The chemo was working but she had to finish the round before they took her out. I said, oh.
That’s why she’s acting hateful. So I befriended her and I started helping her out with cause she was missing days due to side effects of the chemo.
So I decided to take up a go fund me page for her. It was close to 5,000K.
So I went to her house one day she didn’t come in. She was really down. So I decided to lift her spirits by telling her about the go fund me. I showed her the amount and she was ecstatic. So she got happy.
So the next week she was feeling good all week. She decided she wanted to go out to a club that weekend with her friends. That Saturday, I wanted to go down to the club she was at to celebrate her feeling good and I wanted to give her the from the go fund me account.
But I wanted it to be a surprise. So I called her and she picked up and said she just pulled up to the club. I said, well I don’t have any plans, imma come down there to hang out with y’all. She got quiet.
I said I’ll be there in an hour, so answer your phone so you can tell me which club you’re at when I get in the area. She said ok.
I get in the area and I call her. She didn’t pick up, I called over and over, texted her, and left a voicemail.
Then her phone was turned off. I was calling for an hour. So I went back home. Once the club closed, I started calling to see what happened. Her phone answered but she wasn’t on it, I think she tried hitting ignore but mistakenly answered. So I was calling her name when I heard her say to her friends, yea, that was her again.
Her friends started laughing saying the club is over and she’s still calling. Then my friend said, like I’ll really hang out with her, and she was trying to pop up. That crap caught me off guard when she said she was coming, no boo you can’t hang with me outside of work.
I don’t need her uppity self in there with me. I was so hurt because out of her family and friends, I was the only one that helped her financially and raised that for her, and taking her food, and going by her house to check on her.
But her jealousy towards me made her react like that.
So after 10 minutes, my hurt turned into anger, then rage. I contacted everyone that donated on the go fund me and had the sent back to them. I told them the girl died. I called her the next day and she still didn’t answer so I texted her saying, dang, you must have died from cancer.
I guess it came back and killed you. Then I said, well since you died yesterday, I let everyone know who donated to the go fund me account, that you died so she won’t need the donations anymore. And I returned their money. I said it’s too bad you died before I got to the club because I had that for you and I wanted to celebrate with you.
But, you died. She called right back, I blocked her number. When I went to work she said my phone died when I was at the club. I said well it recharged itself when you left the club, cause I called, and you hit the wrong button and you answered the phone.
I told her their conversation, she just looked. I said yea, so as far as I’m concerned, you’re still dead, so you can get out my face.”
33. Pretended To Call "Tony" For My Upstairs Neighbor To Hear
“In my student days, my partner and I lived in an old lowrise apartment building (3 floors, 4 units per floor). We were on the second floor – below us were two elderly women (both in their late 70’s) and above us was this very strange guy who kept complaining to the super about us.
Noise traveled between the floors and, if you really wanted to pay attention you could listen in on conversations from the unit below you.
Other tenants told us that the guy that lived above us was an absolute jerk and had managed to get the previous tenants of our unit evicted (I later found out that they weren’t the first that he’d managed to get rid of).
In any case, we knew the guy was listening to us so one night when I got really fed up with his antics, I turned to my partner, put my finger to my lips as in ‘keep quiet’ and said, ‘That’s it, I’m calling Tony.’ Of course, I didn’t pick up the phone.
All I did was have my half of a pretend conversation.
Tony …
pause
Yeah it’s me
pause
Remember I told you about that jerk that lives above me?
pause
This time I’ve had it. I’ll take you up on your offer.
pause
No. Nothing permanent.
pause
No. No. As long as he gets the message
pause
Okay. Make you a deal. If it happens again …. that’s right.
pause
He heads out for work at about 7:30 every morning. Drives a crappy Oldsmobile.
pause
Thanks, guy.
I owe you.
I never once raised my voice. Purely conversational level. My partner had figured out what I was doing very early on and said ‘Can we trust Tony?’ Answer ‘Yes. he owes me one.’
For the record, I didn’t know a Tony but it sounded good because the big street gangs in the city were both based in the Italian neighborhoods.
Needless to say, the guy tiptoed around and moved out shortly thereafter.”
32. I Yanked Up As Many Flowers As I Could In About 30 Seconds
“For a couple of years, I lived in Toronto, Canada. I was four when we left and this happened the day we were moving.
For the two years that we lived there, the much older kids next door liked to terrorize my younger brother and me. I no longer remember what they did to us, but when we reacted, they would jump into the family car that was always sitting in the driveway and lock the door.
Their mother never did anything about it, or even once came outside to see what was happening.
However, one thing the Mom of bullies did care about, big time, was her flower garden. It was in the front of their house, full of flowers, and she spent hours tending it.
To stay out of the way, my brother and I were outside playing. Neighbor bullies started doing whatever they always did to us, their Mom was oblivious to what is happening and our parents were busy with moving activities. We were on our own.
We reacted as much as a three and four-year-old can and once again, they jumped into their car and locked the door.
So four-year-old Ginger walked past them to the sacred, well-tended flower garden. I then proceeded to yank up flowers by the handful using both of my angry little four-year-old hands.
It’s amazing how many flowers can be pulled in just a little bit of time! Then I ran home and pressed myself against the wall by the open front door because I was pretty sure I knew what was coming.
I didn’t have to wait very long.
Sure enough, in the blink of an eye, the bullies’ Mom comes dashing over to our house, storms in the front door, stops for a brief moment to glare down at me with a look that could kill, stalks on into the house, and confronts my parents who, at this point, are surrounded by moving boxes.
I don’t remember what she said, and at four, she probably used quite a few choice words I wouldn’t have understood anyway. But I do remember her gesturing wildly while my parents just stood there. Knowing my father, I am pretty sure he slid his tongue over to the side of his mouth and bit on it to keep from laughing.
I don’t remember much after that except that I didn’t get in trouble with my understanding parents.
When I think back on the incident, I find it interesting that even as a four-year-old, I knew exactly what button to push.
And I still treasure the memory of how powerful I felt as I pulled up those flowers!”
31. My Best Revenge Was Being Happy
“I had a friend who I considered to be my best friend.
Let’s call her Jody. Well, Jody and I did everything together. I thought she was my best friend, even though she stole my belongings, made fun of me, didn’t invite me to her parties, and made up rumors about me. I was blindly on her side.
In my freshman year of high school, I slowly started to get sick of her. How she was treating me, her attitude, and her recklessness. But I wasn’t ready to let go, not until what I call ‘the big split.’ A new guy moved to our school with who I immediately was infatuated and began a friendship.
I thought she may have liked him but she said she didn’t, ‘he wasn’t her type at all’ … so she couldn’t right? She wouldn’t lie? Well, she did (sort of). The day before my birthday closing night of a performance I was doing she texts me telling me she was going on a (romantic) date with him… to my show.
She continued to rub it in my face that she took him from me, and he stopped talking to me altogether – I lost a romantic interest and a friend. I was dumbstruck. She was manipulative and toxic, and they eventually broke up.
And so did we.
I couldn’t handle her behavior after that anymore and I cut it off. I didn’t hear from the boy, or Jody, for the rest of freshman year. Until they broke up. Then this boy randomly started talking to me in the halls, texting me, and saying hi whenever he could.
I was still madly in like with him, and this drives me crazy. Then one day, I had a pool party and he showed up. I had a bad time and he consoled me and helped me through it staying up until obscene hours of the night to make sure I was ok.
Then, he did it. He asked me on a date.
I was going to turn him down. As much as I liked him, I believed in my moral codes: Don’t date a friend’s ex, even if that person is your ex-friend. Don’t try and hurt people or rub things in their faces.
But before I could say no, he told me everything else. How she had manipulated him into the relationship, forced him not to talk to me, threatened that if he spoke to me she’d break up with him, she talked bad about me to him, flirted with his best friend, and wouldn’t even go near him or on dates with him unless I was there.
Then he told me that he liked me the whole time and still likes me. A lot.
So my best revenge?
Saying yes. Walking into school the next year, with new, better friends, and the most caring partner a girl could ask for.”
30. I Let My Petty Coworker Do Our Work With Human Feces On Her Arm
“I did care work for a lot of years, visiting clients in their homes to provide care for them. I was doubled up with a woman who I got on pretty well with but was LAZY.
When we entered a call we would do whatever was needed of us, then before we left we would write in the care-plan what we had done, what time we got there and left if we had given any medication, etc.
For MONTHS I worked with this woman, and as soon as we entered a house she would sit on the sofa and write the notes in the care-plan, leaving me to do everything and only helping when we needed people (to hoist someone and move them into the bedroom for example).
After a while, it really started to annoy me because she didn’t do ANYTHING!! But me being me and afraid of confrontation didn’t want to say anything and make it awkward so I just got on with it.
Another thing I should mention that annoyed the crap out of me.
We used to have ‘Carer of the month’ where one of the staff would be given a bunch of flowers for doing a good job. I’d never won it before. This one day we had been to a call and the lady we had visited was in a bad way.
The woman I worked with just sat down to write the notes as usual while I did everything I could to make the client comfortable, chatted to her, made her a cup of tea. I went to empty the bedpan in the toilet and heard the client say to my co-worker that she was going to ring the office and nominate me for the carer of the month award for being so helpful.
My co-worker and supposed friend then turned around and said to her, ‘I wouldn’t bother if I were you, she’ll never win it because no one else would ever ring to nominate her.’ And then proceeded to tell her that because my mum worked in the office anyway they would never give it to me because it would be seen as favoritism.
Actually asked my mum if the client ever rang about me and she did, bless her.
Anyway, one day we went to a call and we had a supervisor there for the creative beginning of the call. Surprise, surprise, my coworker decided to actually do some work on this call and threw herself into all the mucky jobs she usually leaves up to me.
As this lady was incontinent, she had to wear a pad (adult diaper) so we had to clean her up and change it. My coworker decided to do the dirty end. Supervisor left halfway through the call so as soon as we had the client in bed, my coworker went to write the notes.
Here’s my petty revenge. As she walked away I noticed she had a massive smear of poop down the back of her arm (we had short-sleeved uniforms to this was on her bare skin). So I didn’t say anything to her. We had to do 4 more calls and she did every one of them with human feces smeared down her arm.
Never said a word to her about it but told everyone else that I worked with about her having poop on her arm. Found it hilarious! Screw you, Andrea.
Never did win that carer of the month either.”
29. Hairdresser Watched Bridesmaids Take Out Every Single Bobby Pin From Their Hair
“Not me but my hairdresser.
She had a wedding party book at the last minute.
She figured the Maid of Honor was supposed to have done this long ago but dropped the ball. My hairdresser came in early and asked her two other hairdressers to come in early to take care of this last-minute group which included the Maid of Honor, 2 bridesmaids, and 2 flower girls as well as the mother of the bride…6 people total. Now my hairdresser is a very upfront person and told the Maid of honor that since this was last minute and she had to ask her two assistants to come in early and open the shop early there was going to be a small up-charge.
I can’t remember what it was but it was something small.
They were an absolute nightmare. They arrived late, took forever to decide how they wanted their hair, complained the whole time about stupid stuff..(like seriously you don’t like the shop color scheme?).
They all decided on these crazy elaborate updos. Each one is loaded with hairspray and hundreds of pins. Hundreds and hundreds of pins. They needed so many pins that the shop assistant actually had to get more while they were working on all that hair.
So, time to pay. The ladies start complaining that they don’t like their hair. It is too high, it is not high enough, the curls are too tight, the curls are too loose. My hairdresser tries to set things right but she realizes what they are doing.
They are planning on not paying. Not just the upcharge. They are not planning on paying at all. So my hairdresser goes into the back and calls the police without the customers knowing.
Well, the Maid of Honor basically confirms the scam. Says they are all very unhappy with their hairdos but now they don’t have time to have their hair redone.
She even smiles snidely and says, ‘what are you going to do, take our hair?’
Hmmm. What a great idea.
In walks the police officer. My hairdresser explains the situation and says that if they leave without paying they are stealing her property.
Btchy maid of honor yells, ‘Our hair isn’t your property.”
‘No,’ my hairdresser says, ‘but those pins are. Take them out and put them right here. Every single one and I won’t press charges for theft of service’
The cop loved this and agrees.
They will remove every single bobby pin and then they can leave without paying.
My hairdresser said the looks on their faces was the best revenge she has ever had.”
28. Three Stories Of Petty Revenge
“I got a few stories.
First: When I was in high school, I was a vice president in the band. The other officers would not host the weekly meetings on any other day, despite the fact that they had nothing to do on any other day.
I had work that day every week. I even talked to the director, but they wouldn’t budge. They made up crap to not do it on any other day. I was fully under the impression they did that so I could not go to meetings.
So, they always talked about how they would be recognized and awarded at the end of the year for doing such a good job. Blah blah blah. And, how I did such a terrible job.
Little they did know, I did almost everything for them discreetly.
They began to assume the job was easy and started doing nothing. Aside from the drum major, who knew what was up and stood by and watched.
It got to where if the director needed anything done or addressed, he came to me first.
At the end of the year, they all got to watch as I got all of these awards and not one of them got anything. Hearing them complain and whine was well worth the effort.
Second: I lived out in the middle of nowhere, so my family’s internet was garbage.
So, only one person could watch Netflix at a time. I came home from work at about 9 at night. My sister had ALL DAY to watch Netflix and chose to watch it at night. Despite my asking, and telling her she could do it any other night besides my work nights, she pretty much told me to eff off.
So, being the little turd, I was, I used software on my machine to disable her internet right as everyone went to sleep. Every night. I stopped after she watched Netflix regularly in the day. Took about a month?
Third: College roommate. God, I hated him.
Was also absolutely insane. He would scream and throw crap when he died in a side-scrolling game on steam. Single-player. Not worth the rage. Would do the same in Overwatch. But mostly the first game. He would do it about 1-2 am in the morning, it was a common occurrence.
He had the gall to tell me I was loud once and threw a hissy fit when I was loud, despite me asking him 10 times a month to shut up.
The same trick as on the sister. For Overwatch anyway. If he got loud during the other one, I would replace all of the lightbulbs in my living room and kitchen with flashbulbs (think of an electrical flashbang.) As bright as the sun, for only a moment.
He was up earlier than me so it seared his eyes out. Got the idea from my grandpa who did that to his roommate who came home late and woke him up every night. The same set of flashbulbs. (He had a hundred leftovers and gave them to me).
That s*t also stopped quick.”
27. Woman Keeps On Parking In Our Garage So Her Passenger Ends Up In The Curb
“When I was about 4 or 5, I used to live in a little house right across an amusement park. All I remember is that parking costs a pretty penny. That’s why some people would come and park right across the street from us. So on summer days, our street was packed.
And although that sometimes irked my parents, ONE woman took it way too far. She didn’t park across the street. She didn’t park in the middle of the street. No, she parked in our GARAGE.
Crazy, right?
My dad was a bit…surprised. So he didn’t do anything too big, he just got his car and parked right behind her (horizontally) so that she couldn’t get out.
Then we all left for a couple of hours.
When we got back she was upset, and we just laughed it off thinking it was a one-time thing.
But it wasn’t. She did it again. Parked right back in our garage.
But, this time she caught my dad in a bad mood.
He saw the car there, then picked the lock on her car door. He went inside, grabbed her cup of lemonade, and spilled it all over the floor. Then he dismantled the passenger seat and left it on the curb of our house.
He waited and watched.
The woman walked right up into our driveway, not even noticing that the seat was RIGHT THERE. When she went into our garage, the first thing she noticed was her cup on the floor. She cussed and got into the car.
Then we heard another string of cuss words and she came out of the car.
My dad, watching all of this from the window, started laughing.
The lady, who probably heard the sound of an animal wheezing in my house, was upset and probably scared.
She picked up her seat from the curb of our house and put it into her car.
Never again did we hear from that lady.”
26. Managed To Rebuild My Life After Ex Left Me Buried In Debt
“My ex bailed on me after a house fire, where we lost 3 of our kitties and his dead mom’s Golden Retriever, both his parents’ (separate) deaths, business difficulties, etc.
IHooked up with one of his clients.
Had the nerve to tell me he didn’t see any way out of our 643K debt.
He hated being a contractor (a family business he ran into the ground).
She was going to take care of him while he decided what he wanted to do with his life.
At 42. Well, I guess these decisions can take time.
Didn’t know what he wanted, but evidently, after 18 years it wasn’t anything with me.
I’ve struggled, taking care of our, now MY pets, several jobs at a time, living in a crappy house, scared to death.
But I’ve made it. In the last 10 years, on a waitress’ and yoga teacher’s income, I didn’t lose my house. I even managed to continue to rebuild, one step at a time, teaching myself.
The sweetest revenge wasn’t something I took.
It was just living my life. Rebuilding my life. Rebuilding my home.
I saw him a while back and my 6′5″ total hunk of a husband, 8 years younger than I, looked like a fat, puffy, old guy. He was soft, balding, (combing his hair straight back, looking like a serious redneck) visibly dissatisfied with everything, and a braggart.
Wasn’t working, so his benefactress held the purse strings. While he decided what he wanted to do with his life.
From his comments, I knew ‘Paradisio’ had turned into a living for him.
So sad.”
25. Made My Obnoxious Coworker Swear In French
“About 15 years ago, I worked in this engineering outfit with an obnoxious, loud co-worker.
I’ll call him Obnoxo. The team of engineers was pretty small, and we would occasionally hang out outside of work. Long of way saying he knew my wife.
I was at work, it was my birthday and she called to wish me a happy birthday.
Obnoxo was within earshot and he comes over, grabs my phone, and tells her: instead of calling me, she should come over to our workplace and give me a special b-day naughty treat.
Outside work, after a few drinks, I may let it slide but this really annoyed the out of me.
So, I became a script kiddy and figured out how to crash his workstation by sending a special packet that would cause a buffer overrun.
The first time I did it, he didn’t really react, just rebooted and went on. I waited a few days.
Did it again. Twice. Although I could not see him, I heard him swearing in French.
I waited a few days, then enabled a script that checked to see if his computer was up, wait a random time, and fire off that deadly packet.
The swearing intensified into French and English. By the end of the week, he had PTSD every time his PC became even a little sluggish.
I happened to be walking by his cube when my script took him down. This time he didn’t flinch or swear.
He calmly picked up the computer, dragged out to the shop floor, and heaved it into the dumpster with the monitor and his mouse, and other cables all dragging along for the ride.
The boss made him retrieve it and make it all work again.
Microsoft also issued a patch to fix that hole, so my role as Obnoxo’s tormentor ended.
But satisfaction was mine.”
24. Sent A Special Birthday Gift To My Dormmate Who Got Back With Her Ex On Valentine's Day
“I was a freshman in college.
Shortly after Christmas break, I met a nice guy, also a freshman, and we started going out together. A girl in my dorm had recently broken up with him, but he seemed to be over it. He’d bought her a pair of diamond earrings for Christmas, but she didn’t get them as she’d broken up with him before he had a chance to give them to her.
Naturally, I was hoping I’d get them for Valentine’s Day. Shortly before the day, the ex finds out about the earrings and sweet talks him into taking her back. He spent a small fortune on their Valentine’s Day night out as well as gave her the diamond earrings.
The very next day, she broke up with him, and Dan came back to me, his tail between his legs, and being young and ‘stupid’, I took him back.
Fast forward to summer vacation. It’s July, and the ex’s birthday is a week away.
So I grabbed my best friend and a shoebox well-lined with plastic wrap, and we headed out to the boonies in search of a pasture with cows in it. We wandered around until we had a box full of, you guessed it, fresh cow dung!
I sealed the bag, sealed the box, wrapped it in birthday paper, wrapped it in brown grocery bag paper, & mailed it to the ex at her home.
To this day, she thinks Dan sent her the box! So I really got a bit of revenge on the guy as well.
That was 42 years ago, and I don’t think of it very often, but when I do, my mouth lifts in a huge grin.
P.S. I kicked that guy to the curb shortly after sending the box. Older and not so stupid by then!”
23. Arrogant Neighbor Parks Her Third Car In My Space Because Hers Is More Expensive Than Mine
“I lived in an ‘upmarket’ apartment block, most of the cars were either Benz, Bentleys, couple of Rolls, and several upmarket 4WDS.
One female owner was a pure ‘up herself’ loudmouth with no class. Each apartment has two parking lots which we paid for in the cost of the apartment.
I owned two cars like many of us did, the Loud Mouth woman took delivery of a third car, a brand new top-of-the-range Benz. (very smart car and very expensive)
One of my cars was being serviced, came home and found the new Benz on one of my parking spots, called the Loud Mouth, and informed her the car would need to be removed by the following afternoon as my second car was being delivered from the mechanic.
Loud Mouth informed me this was not convenient and that I would need to park on the street as her Benz was more valuable than my second car. The second car was delivered by a mechanic (parked it on an allocated visitor’s space), again contacted Loud Mouth requesting my legally owned parking spot, Loud Mouth became abusive and informed me that her husband was a judge and she could take any spot she so desired as they now had three cars.
Well, revenge is sweet, had some prawns for dinner, kept the juice, and sucked the juices into a syringe I had. I had acquired a long needle, and injected prawn juices into the rubber around the driver’s side door, without setting the car alarm off.
Her Benz remained in my parking spot for several more days.
At dinner, a few evenings later Mrs. Loud Mouth in attendance, complaining about the ghastly stink of ‘beautiful new Benz’, cannot locate the source of the stink, despite the dealers taking the car in for investigation.
The car was eventually removed from my spot and never returned to the parking lot, never seen to be seen again. Believe there was some sort of legal action taken by Loud Mouth which she lost.”
22. Ex Was Talking Bad Things Behind Me So I Cut Holes On All Of His Shirts
“My ex who turned out to be a certified sociopath got caught screwing around. The dude used to sleep so deeply that it was impossible to wake him at times. So naturally, I took advantage of this fact and when I suspected he was two-timing.
I went through his phone and found I was right. He had been in contact with an old flame who he then went and talked major crap about me too. If it were true, I wouldn’t have had the reaction I did however it was all lies.
So I threw his phone at him. He didn’t budge. I’m standing in my room fuming and noticed just how at home he had made himself. He just did laundry and had all of his clothes hung all nice and organized in my closet.
@ 30 t-shirts and dozen or so pants all nicely hung.
So my mind took off with ideas. I’m not one to get revenge or truly hurt another person. My conscience just can’t handle it. So I got creative. I wanted him to not be able to just leave and move on and never look back.
I wanted him to remember what a jerk he was to me who did nothing but be good to him. So I decided to take every one of his shirts and cut a hole in the shoulder. Small enough you wouldn’t throw it out but just big enough that you knew it was there and why.
30 shirts. All with a little reminder to think twice before doing someone dirty who was truly good to you.”
21. Little Kid With A Bad Mouth Gets A Taste Of His Own Medicine
“I am American. I worked in Mexico, just across the border for five years. I saw a lot of things while I was there, but this moment always stands out.
There was a novelty and souvenir shop near the border. American visitors would come and buy knock-off Rolexs and visit their ‘pharmacy.’ They had a restaurant that was actually quite good.
I was meeting some folks for a meal there and up the stairway from the parking area to the shop a young Mexican boy, about 10 or 11, had this frightened American mother and daughter cornered. He was being nasty. He just kept saying all of the English cuss words he knew and it was obviously upsetting the pair as they seemed to be waiting for someone to come join them.
‘Screw you!…’ The brat just kept going. I told him to get away and he trotted off.
A couple of days later, I was waiting in the traffic line to cross back into the States. Several vendors, window washers, and beggars looking to make some while they had a captive audience in the form of a slow-moving traffic line.
There he was! The little brat with the potty mouth. He was giving his best ‘Woe is me’ face with his hand out looking for spare change.
My vehicle had tinted windows to combat the intense sun. He couldn’t see me coming. I got up to the sad-acting little booger and rolled down my window (he lit up expecting some moolah), looked him in the eye, and said, ‘Screw you!’ just like he had been saying to the mother and daughter a few days earlier.
He recognized me. His jaw dropped and I went laughing on my way.”
20. Father Drank His Coffee With Three Teaspoons Of Salt
“My birthday is April Fool’s Day. When I was around ten years old, my two brothers and I decided to pull a prank on my father (who was extremely self-centered and had an enormous ego.)
I had read that if you empty a sugar bowl and replace the sugar with salt and then watch carefully, some interesting reactions would ensue.
So my brothers and I did just that, laughing conspiratorially throughout the meal. My father asked us what we were laughing at.
‘Nothing.’
As the meal went on, we continued to laugh. The more we laughed, the angrier my father became, until he just exploded at the dinner table.
We were all crying. (One brother fell on the floor, which was his reflexive response to my father’s attacks.
My father kicked him, yelling at him to stand up like a man.)
Afterward, he made us sit in silence to finish our meal. We sniffled and choked down our food. Then came the birthday cupcakes, which we ate in silence.
We were silent as my mother served my father coffee.
We were silent as he put three heaping teaspoons of salt in his coffee.
He spits his coffee across the table.
Then we laughed. And laughed. And laughed.
And that was the ‘sweetest’ revenge ever.”
19. Pinned The Bully To The Wall After He Made Fun Of My Notebook
“I was always unusually strong and tall for my age. But of course, fist-fighting was strictly forbidden and the teachers actually encouraged kids to tell them if people fought.
Anyways, I’m not very social and at my school, being social was the key thing to avoid bullying.
Unfortunately, I didn’t realize this in time, and by the time I did, I had become the biggest target in my class. I wanted to fight them with force but I couldn’t sense it would ruin my grades and my entire life for all I knew.
There was this one kid in class (I’m gonna call him H) who was constantly picking on me. H was very popular and had a gang of boys following him around. When I was minding my own business, he would come and do stuff like slapping my head or take something mine.
He always returned it saying sorry but with amusement on his face.
I tolerated this for 6 months.
Then one day, H crossed the line. I enjoyed writing fanfics and usually brought my idea notebook to school. I put it in my bag and gone for lunch.
When I came back, I had found H reading my notebook and laughing with his friends. When I snatched it back, I was infuriated. I take my privacy seriously and this was crossing the line.
Remember what I said about me being strong? Well, this is what happened. I walked up to H with what must have been complete fury in my eyes because for a moment he froze, absolute fear in his eyes.
Then he took off.
I must have been radiating something because when I turned to his gang, they backed away. I grabbed one of them and growled, “Get him here. NOW.”
They immediately complied and when they found him, I went up to him, grabbed his shirt and lifted him off his feet, and pinned him against the wall.
I learned some army talk from my martial arts teacher (a former military drill Sargent) and talked to H in a threatening, yet menacing way like in the army. The look of complete terror in H’s eyes and him begging for forgiveness still lingers in my mind today and he hasn’t touched me since.”
18. Former Job Offered To Give Me The Raise I've Been Requesting After Filing My Resignation
“I worked for a small, but mildly successful company in a niche market for about 4 years, and at the company, I was the only person who could do my job.
I spent 6 months trying to persuade them to raise my hourly rate to around £11-13 an hour given the fact I was making them a fortune every day and I had seen my job being offered at a few other firms across the country at £15 an hour.
I worked super hard, jumped through hoops, worked long shifts and weekends on the promise that I would get a decent pay rise…they upped my hourly rate from £8.22 to £8.52 and then expected me to be grateful about it.
So I secretly spent the next few months job searching, found something way better with more and an actual career ladder, applied for it, and got the job.
I kept it completely to myself and carried on as normal, if not slightly happier than usual. I went into the office where my superiors (barely) were, asked if I could have Friday off (which they allowed after some haggling), and reiterated my gratitude for my 22 pence pay rise.
I worked as normal until Thursday lunchtime, at which I went into the office and reminded them I was off the next day and handed them my resignation, and that my 2 weeks notice was to be taken out of my remaining holiday days. All broke loose, and I got to stand there with a massive sht-eating grin on my face while they begged me to stay and offered me more money, etc.
Long story short, I left my job for greener pastures and I bumped into an ex-colleague last month and he told me they still haven’t managed to find someone to replace me…I left 15 months.”
17. Classmate Tried To Shame Me For Doing Community Service, Ends Up Failing Math Class
“I’ve always been taught that, no matter what the argument, whoever starts the fight is in the wrong.
Well, they did forget to add ‘Unless it’s a girl, in which case you’re wrong regardless’, so one day, after being repeatedly insulted, pushed, and hit by a girl whom I approached for no other reason than being tasked to hand the class some papers, I reacted in an equally violent way, and predictably got expelled for three days while she got nothing.
Thing is, while being forbidden to attend class, I was still forced to go to school.
How does that work, you might ask? Well, it’s basically the school’s equivalent of community service: I had to spend those three days tidying up the library.
Let me rephrase: three days spent shuffling books, writing, cutting, and sticking on tags, and writing Excel sheets on a 90s computer.
Basically heaven.
Add the permission to listen to music and the punishment turned out to be a blessing in disguise.
Except for this one classmate of mine, whom I had a slight argument with (i.e. I’d thrown him an eraser for disrespecting our teacher and he choked me).
He was tasked with getting something from the library and stumbled upon me.
He said ‘Are you enjoying your isolation?’ with a rather malicious tone.
As someone who enjoys isolation, I was having a blast, and would still be too proud to admit otherwise anyway, I answered ‘Yes, I am.’
A couple of days after (the school had since ended), on a sunny summer afternoon, I was entering the building to do what God remembers what afternoon activity and passed by an open door.
Inside the room, my math teacher (not exactly the kind of person one would be excited to spend their free time with) was doing extra lessons for those who hadn’t passed his class.
Well, I say those, only one person was there.
You’d never guess.
Now ain’t that an isolation to enjoy.”
16. The Greatest Revenge Is Being Nice No Matter What
“There’s this woman that I know who treats her husband with 0 respect. She had an affair with someone, got out after she found out she got chronically ill, and now she pulls out her final card towards her husband by using threats to get everything her way.
Her husband is scared to leave her because of this particular reason that she would actually do it, and so he’s staying just for the sake of the kids. She has always been a nightmare of a woman, pretty much how any narcissist behaves, too busy thinking about herself, not thinking of others, everything evolving around her… Their lives are sad, their kids are even sadder…
I’ve wanted to make their kids happy even in all circumstances they’re going through.
So what did I do for ‘revenge?’
First, I ordered them pizza!
One that appears to be a popular one with pork and cheese and such. I downloaded this delivery app, added some money, placed an ‘anonymous’ order, and then 30 minutes later their pizza arrived at their place.
Funny thing was, I used their daughter’s significant other’s name and delivered it to their daughter. Can you imagine what they were thinking when the pizza arrived?
Their daughter to her guy: ‘Aw, thank you so much for the pizza!’
Guy: ‘What pizza?’
Daughter: ‘The pizza that you ordered!’
Guy: ‘I didn’t order anything!’
Daughter: ‘???’
I hope they enjoyed their lunch.
Even though it was an anonymous order, I’m sure her husband knows who it was from, because he knows that pizza place is 7km away and hidden somewhere in a small street, and he knows it is my favorite pizza place to eat.
I tipped the driver through the app with the maximum amount that could be given and texted ‘Thank you!’
And then after that, I’ve sent more anonymous ‘gifts’ like school supplies, gift vouchers, more food… just to make their kids happy, despite what their parents go through.
It’s hard to change a narcissist, but I hope they come to common sense one day that this issue that they have between the two of them cannot continue for the sake of their children.”
15. My Lose Streak At Family Game Nights Has Come To An End
“Family game nights on a Friday night is the reincarnation of in this earthly world.
Every Friday night, we’d sit together with a rotation of board-games to play.
This week it was Ludo, and last week it was Monopoly. Believe me when I say that the gamblers on our impromptu casino table were no less guilty of balling on that income tax than those Indian IRS callers.
Eight-year-old me was a sore loser. And a bad sport.
Everyone was older than me and better than me at every darn board-game we’d play.
Board-games turned into bored games for me, as I sat on the table with mom, dad, my sister, and neighborhood friend-turned-enemy, Monty — only to lose every Friday.
But the week before had my limits crossed. I gambled away my life savings to Monty — what was left of my Beyblade collection — after he drove me to the brink of homelessness.
It was double or nothing, baby.
And so I devised a plan for this week’s Ludo game.
I was so gonna mothering win and demolish Monty.
The morning of the big night, we bought a Ludo board from the dollar store, made out of thinned cardboard.
We played all of our games on a metallic family-sized table, just like this one, which only brought a cheesier grin to my face.
It wasn’t until evening rolled by, that everyone had begun mentally preparing themselves for this esteemed night.
Dad was fast asleep on the couch, and it took a nudge or fifteen to wake him up. Eventually, he came to his senses, and soon enough, we had begun yet another round of the family game night.
Everyone took their seats, as Monty set down the Ludo counters with a sly grin on his face. Counters like normal ones, but a metallic filling underneath them.
And so naturally, the counters stuck pretty well to the table, allowing for them to easily be slid across the board.
But straight from the commentary box, the bells had rung and the roars of the crowd settled in.
“DING DING DING! FIGHT!”
The dining room light dimmed in a synchronous manner to the building tension. My nose had filtered through mom’s delirious food trap from the kitchen nearby.
“I get the first roll!” my sister snarled, snatching one of the dice from Monty’s reach. Nobody complained. Everybody was too ‘in the zone’ to distract themselves with a fit of whining.
She took both and rolled the dice. One and one. She moved two steps out with her first counter.
I mentally calculated the number of steps she took, to ensure that she didn’t fudge the lines.
Sweet irony. Oh, sweet irony.
Going clockwise, I was the last to get my share of the dice. I had to put up a stoic expression, but deep down, for every ‘tick’ of the clock, my heart beat twice.
The dice reach me. I wriggled my hands in a fit of nervousness and excitement about what was to soon unfold. Four and three. I made the move.
The ticks and the tocks of the clock. I nervously took a peek at the clock from my peripheral vision and made out that 20 minutes had passed.
I was two counters down, and Monty matched that amount. At this point, however, everyone else was out of the equation for their Ludo soldiers had been martyred in the middle of warfare.
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. That was all I could hear. The crowd went silent.
Commentators seemed to be out of breath from excitement, for there was no chit-chat from the microphones.
My eyes narrowed on Monty and his counter pieces. I looked back and forth between the two, studying his sleight of hands.
There was no way in God’s grace that I was gonna lose to Monty.
He was coming after me and my glass marbles with no remorse.
I kicked the foot of my sister, sitting on my left, and facing Monty. I then kicked myself with my other foot and howled in pain.
I scapegoated my sister, before the two of us tag-teamed Monty into the oblivion of hatred. We all started arguing, and chaos ensued at the table.
I sadistically smiled inside, and, while arguing, took one of these knockoff buckyball magnets out of my right pocket.
Arguing into the face of the demonic Monty, I slammed one hand over the board. And the other, under the board, as it navigated its way to the counter closest to home.
Eventually, dad intervened and got us all to calm down. I did quite easily, but freaking Monty and my sister were still at it.
I didn’t mind. I sat down, and slowly, inched my counter one step closer to making it home.
I continued to do so for a bit.
Through laughter, physical and stinky distractions, as well as provoked arguments, my third counter made it home.
Soon enough Monty’s third one did, too. But alas, my fourth counter was halfway home. I continued my tactics through loud burps, storm-trooper killing farts, and occasionally blaming Monty for allegedly taking shortcuts.
Five minutes later, I made it. I won!
The crowd went crazy, chanting my name through all crannies and nooks in my dining room. Light closed in on the dining room, like two faces of a book, as the commentators rambled on about my greatness.
I sat there with a smug look, as Monty rolled his eyes. He threw his bag of marbles at me. My sly grin only grew bigger.
That Friday night, my fourth counter made it home. And Monty? Oh, he ran across the floor, took the stairs, and held back his tears.
I bet he cried himself to sleep in a fetal position.
I haven’t seen him ever since. I moved out of that apartment a month later. And recently, into a new house. While unpacking everything, in a little box, I found the marble.
Monty, if you ever read this, I hope you’re doing well and your Beyblades are broken.”
14. My Driving Skills Were Put To A Test
“In 1980, I had a full-size Ford F250 truck, which is somewhat larger than a sedan. I was on a 2-lane highway in Massachusetts, when the national speed limit had been reduced to 55mph, down from the 65mph it had been previously (in order to reduce the nation’s dependence on foreign oil), and to which it has returned today.
Back then, groups of cars would travel together in ‘wolf packs’ at 10 to 20 miles over that speed limit. It was a reaction, a protest, to the lowered speed limit. I have never seen them since the limit was raised. We always felt safe, because who would the police stop?
In the dozens of times, I was with them, I never saw any police action. The 5 to 20 cars were always good drivers, moving smoothly amongst themselves and while passing other cars. It was almost like a ballet – smooth and beautiful to watch and be part of.
When such a group came upon you, you could just join in and become one of them. It felt like some kind of liberation. Everyone was observant of the others, of course, because no one would want to be part of a reckless group of speedy vehicles.
In all my experience, I only noticed one driver who was not ‘with it,’ as a wolf pack is a team effort sort of thing. Perhaps he was a bit inebriated or on illegal substances.
One time, I was traveling at 65mph in front of four cars on a 2-lane highway where the oncoming traffic was too heavy for normal passing.
The road had a shoulder wide enough to park a car beyond the white line. A speedy sports car came up behind us and decided to pass each car, one by one, on the shoulder. He would pass each car, pull in front, and make the car passed pull back a bit to ensure adequate space between the vehicles.
Passing on the shoulder is considered dangerous because the vehicles being passed may or may not be aware of this vehicle, and, who knows, how much in control they are in, considering its relatively unusual nature. I would be surprised if any of these other drivers weren’t concerned about this.
I could see that the car had a quick pickup and that the driver had a fast reaction time.
So…when it was in the process of speeding up and passing my truck – the ground beyond the shoulder was at the exact same level as the pavement, so I knew it was safe for what I was about to do – I merely moved over to the right three feet, forcing the car to be half on the shoulder and half on the grass.
You won’t believe how fast he sped out of there and didn’t slow down until he was out of sight. Hopefully, he learned a lesson. I pumped both arms in the air several times in celebration. I assume several of the drivers behind me could see me doing this in silhouette.
I like to imagine that some of them were laughing and cheering, but how could I ever know?”
13. Trashed My Boss's Office With Garlic Sauce Before I Quit
“When I was in my early 20s, I had a terrible job at a store where I worked the counter to process sales for the commissioned floor staff. Management had me do crap work for them like blowing up dozens of balloons with this nasty goo in it for hours at a time whenever there was a sale on, even though I’m terrified of balloons popping.
The boss was horrible. She left notes critiquing me and the other young women who worked there every single day. She wouldn’t pay me for breaks and docked me for being 5 minutes late (it was a 3 hour round trip commute for 4-hour shifts. She said I could work at a store closer to my house.
She lied.), but wouldn’t pay me for the 1/2 hour it took to close every night.
We went through 9 counter staff in 1 year. By contrast, our sister store, which had a different boss, had the same 3 people working the counter for 3 years. I was one of the veterans, wielding there for 2 years, outlived only by a middle-aged woman named Karen.
Karen was nice to my face but talked behind my back, I discovered. I figured out she told the boss that I was violating the dress code. I had no idea how. Karen wore dirty Birkenstocks every single day. As a protest, I changed into the exact same outfit every day to work- dress pants, an argyle sweater, and black heels.
When I got written up again, I marched into the boss’s office and asked her what problem she had with my outfit. She said ‘well that one’s fine’ and I said I’VE BEEN WEARING THIS EXACT OUTFIT FOR 5 MONTHS. She had no answer.
That basically was the last straw.
I got a manager who hated my boss but liked me to give me a reference, wrote a 2-page letter to my bad boss outlining how terrible she was, with suggestions about how to retain staff in the future, and then went into the depths of my parents fridge to find the nastiest thing I could get my hands on.
I found the most rancid jar of garlic dipping sauce, buried at the back and bulging at the sides. I brought it in a Ziploc bag along with some gloves on my last day. Just before I closed up, I opened the gates of and smeared a big old lump of that putrid fetid goo on the doorknob of everyone who had ever wronged me.
My boss’s whole office stunk like death and the thought of her getting that foul stench on her as soon as she came in the next day comforted me in the way only true pettiness can. Never been so glad to quit a job in my life.”
12. Catfished My Deceitful Ex-Wife
“When my ex-wife was trying to get back together with me, I made a fake flirting profile. I had a real profile which is why she told me she also had one; she was annoyed I was trying to move on. She liked the fake profile less than 12 hours after I made it.
When you’re married to someone, especially someone who deceives you, you learn their codes. Fake me makes a date to grab a drink sometime.
A few days later, she asks real me to come over for dinner at our marital home. She says she has to go out for some dinner prep items and proceeds to put on a ridiculous amount of makeup and go through ‘fixing herself’ rituals I hadn’t seen since the early days.
Of course, I’m texting her as the other guy the whole time. Fake me is telling her I can only meet up for a drink or two for a few minutes. She’s all about it and she’s talking crap about the real me up to this ‘stranger,’ saying I’m a glorified babysitter without manliness.
Meanwhile, she’s talking to IRL me like we’re going to have a romantic dinner and awesome romance later. Fake me calls off the date and she immediately starts shutting down what she was excited about. Instead of the wonderful dinner she had in mind, she ran out of energy and just wanted to make mac-n-cheese.
At this point, I tell her I was catfishing her. The narcissistic woman then claimed she knew it was me all along and she was just testing me.
Caught her with another man before all this. Found out she was a habitual liar, but I can’t claim that surprised me much.
She was violent, too, and after a time, I was also violent. I only tack that last part on to say, ‘I’m no saint.’ The catfishing was beneath me, too; I just had to be sure. There was I time I would have gone to -and-back for her but she had me thrown in Cuyahoga County Jail once because she got locked up in city jail for ten days; that was the end of that devotion.”
11. Motor Shop Guy Didn't Help Me With My Motor Job So I Took Materials From His Sale
“20 years ago I had an old 68 Dodge Monaco convertible that needed a motor job.
I was going to do it myself but my father told me that a guy he used to work for had just bought a motor shop and told him he’d give us a deal if we ever needed any work done. I got a quote, it was reasonable, so I dropped off the motor, picked it up when it was ready, and put it back in.
Turns out the motor wasn’t quite right and needed to be taken apart again. I called him up and he said they were quite busy and that he’d call me next week. This went on for a couple of months, I’d call and he’d say next week.
Eventually, the shop went bankrupt. He agreed to give me the parts I needed to fix the motor if I wanted to put them in myself. On the day the parts were supposed to be in, I drive to the shop and it turns out they’re having a sale to get rid of all their tools and equipment.
I saw a really nice industrial drill press with lots of heavy-duty bits. I ask for a price on it then tell him I don’t have any but that I’ll pay him when I pick up my parts. We load the press and the bits into the truck and off I go.
Another couple of weeks go by and I finally get a call that my parts are in. His wife is heading my way so I can go meet her to pick them up and pay her. She gives me the parts and asks for the money.
I replied very nicely that I want to check the parts first and that I’ll pay her husband later. That afternoon I get a call from the husband looking for his money. I told him I would check the parts and call him next week.
After a couple of weekly calls and me giving him the old next-week bit that he had given me, he stopped calling.
He ran into my father a few months later at a coffee shop and tried to tell my dad how I ed him over.
My father let him have it and told him that the way he did business was no doubt why a motor shop that existed for 20 years closed within a year of his buying it.”
10. Wiped Two-Month's Worth Of Petty Client's Data
“Ok, when you take an x-ray the image gets transferred to an acquisition computer that stores the images.
I fix the hardware and the software on these machines. Now we take a picture of the incoming system and an outgoing picture when we ship. A lot of times the customer sends in their power cord, which is very unnecessary and just makes their shipping costs higher.
If their power cord looks old and yellow I just throw it out and give them a brand new one for free.
So this one customer complained to tech support that I didn’t send back all their accessories, they actually escalated it and demanded compensation.
I saw the email in which they said I sent in a power cord and I didn’t receive it back so we owe them money, rules are rules. So fast forward about a year and I notice the same clinic sent in the same system for repairs.
Now we have a rule that if we scan a system and it has malware, we can’t touch it. We format both drives and reimage them, with no data recovery because of the risk of infecting our in-house network. Now in reality we rarely even scan the systems unless there are a lot of unauthorized programs on the desktop or something.
I would have never scanned it honestly but rules are rules you know. I run the scan and there was some harmless malware so I wipe all their crap. Now their data is backed up on a server but the process of retrieving their data is about 2 months, it’s a huge pain in the as.
I did a little evil villain laugh as I was formatting their drives.”
9. Church Group Won't Remove My Email From Their List So I Sent Overwhelming Pictures To Everyone
“A while ago, my email address was added to a mailing list for a church group located in the southern USA.
It was a Gmail address and I naturally assume it was added in error.
I deleted the first few messages as there were not many. After a week or so, the volume of email started to increase a lot as their events were being organized and everyone was responding with ‘reply all.’
First off, I sent an email to the address that seemed to belong to the organizer, the one who was initiating the email chains.
‘Hi, I am not part of your group. Please remove me from this email distribution list.’
No response.
Over the next couple of days, as each new message arrives, I send another one.
No response.
So far I have only been sending it to the leader.
The next day I send a ‘Reply all’. (They are not sending the messages BCC, so I can see all the addresses)
Again, I am ignored. I try again, no response.
I am now receiving 10-20 of this a day. So I take the nuclear option.
As each message arrives, I ‘reply all’ with inappropriate images.
‘Since you won’t remove me from the list here is my input.’
I start mild and crank it up.
I received outraged replies about this being a Christian Church group, I reply with something worse.
‘I asked nicely for weeks to be removed and was ignored. So here is another fine picture for you. ‘
The email list disappeared from my inbox within 24 hours.”
8. Cut A Girl And Her Ex Off Of My Life Because They Caused Me To Have Anxiety
“I wouldn’t say this is my sweetest revenge, but I’ll just talk about what I went through in 6th grade (I’m an eighth-grader now, and of course, I’m comfortable enough to talk about this situation).
And before everyone gets confused, I went to this middle school, but I moved schools because of a personal reason.
So, a little brief about this one girl, her name is Emma. I was the new kid at the school (first year). We obviously met each other at school (October 2018), and we were good friends.
She had an ex named Nick. And Emma and Nick dated in elementary school but broke up because Nick was annoying and whiny.
Fast forward to February of 2019, Emma asked me out and I accepted it. It went pretty smoothly for the first few weeks, but then it went downhill afterward.
The first red flag was that Emma avoids talking to me most of the time, and she ‘didn’t make time for me,’ because we only get to see each other at lunch. She said that I should go get lunch first, and she will catch up to me soon.
The more she excused herself to talk to her friends, the more I felt like she was hiding something from me.
Up to May of 2019, I asked Emma if she actually loved me, and she said that she was using me the whole time so Nick could leave Emma alone.
I can’t put my finger on it, but I just felt like something ain’t right about what she said. Or like there was more to tell me about the situation, but she didn’t tell me because she knows that it was going to hurt me more emotionally and mentally.
So after lunch, I talked to the guidance counselor if I could change tables, and gladly, he let me. So I moved to Nick’s table, and we started to talk to each other more (no hard feelings whatsoever). Emma even acted weirdly since I changed tables since she didn’t know that I talked to the guidance counselor about it.
She would spy on me and Nick, like what we’re doing, how we talk to each other, and sometimes spy on what we’re talking about. Whenever Nick or I saw her spying on us, she would look away. But then one day, Nick invited Emma to the same table.
I was annoyed, and he obviously knew that she played with my feelings. But… Nick just ignored my problem and told me that he was friends with Emma. They were talking to each other, and I felt like I was ditched from them. So I cut Emma and Nick out of my life.
I never heard or received an apology from either one of them, but I never expected them to because there’s no point in apologizing for the past when it can’t be fixed. I’m still trying to move on from the past, and trying my best to forgive myself for all the pain I’ve been through, and all the mistakes I’ve made to make my family to have to deal with me.
To this day, I still struggle to trust others easily and commit to a relationship because I’m scared that this situation could possibly happen again. And if the relationship is like a healthy relationship, I would be panicky and more anxious, and I can’t control it.
So I have to break up with the person so I can relieve my anxiety.”
7. Girl Who Stole 80 Dollars At My Old Workplace Had To Walk In The Rain Months After
“So I worked with this person. She stole 80 dollars. I was a server. There was nothing I could do and I wasn’t getting my back and I knew it.
Months later, I had found a new job. I get a call from my old place of employment. ‘Yes, I need a cab to so and so.’ I recognized the voice. I was the cab driver.
I knew it was her.
I go anyway.
When I arrive there, she is smiling. I said 80 dollars to get in this cab babe. And I just looked at her and smiled back.
‘You can’t do that. I know the company. I’m calling you in. I know the owner.’ I laugh and I’m like yeah I know him too.
He’s the guy that hired me. But if you want in this particular cab, there’s an 80 buck deposit.
Ha, I’m like go right ahead but if you don’t wanna walk home in the rain there’s an 80 dollars upfront fee.
Now this whole time I have the window cracked. And literally, nothing else is unlocked.
She was so mad.
I smiled ear to ear and says hey remember tricking me out of 80 dollars? She said you’re a cabbie now and you have a duty to customer service. I said, ‘Well, just slip a hundo through the window.’
She was absolutely livid.
You can’t do this. This is an assault. I NEED A RIDE HOME…. NOW. I was like yep I need my coin back honey!
But what could she do? I drove away smiling. Karma, sometimes, is a mother!”
6. Managers' Clash Gets Spiced Up Because Of My Intentional Mistake
“This happened a few years ago. Back then I had just graduated and joined a firm as a trainee. I was into the Product Development Team along with a couple of other guys and my manager (let’s call him R) was the least bit interested in work.
He was the typical boss who always blames others for failures.
The product I was working on was developed by another manager (call him S) who was heading a different department now. As a result of any change I wanted to do, my manager asked me to go ahead and contact S.
S, on the other hand, would help me depending on his mood even and he was not a very good person to work with either. S at times would get angry and ask why I don’t consult R and keep coming back to me for it.
To this I would reply that I approach him most of the time I come here but R would always ask me to discuss with you (S) and if you agree he will also agree. S had this thing against R and wanted to pin him down whenever he got an opportunity.
It so happened that any change in the product would have to be informed, discussed, and then ‘approved’ by S and then R would give his go-ahead depending on whether S’s approval. To be honest R’s role in product development was ZERO.
In addition, R also did not like when I would directly contact S to save time and decision-making. One fine day I had to discuss a change in one of the products and took the details with me informed R about it and requested him to accompany me so as to freeze the config then and there.
When we went to S’s cabin, S pointed out multiple mistakes in my work. Since S was already waiting for an opportunity to pin down R he turned to him and asked how come there are so many mistakes in the work to which R directly started speaking against me before S.
He said things like What have you done? Why don’t you pay attention to your work? Because of you, I have to get embarrassed and stuff like that. (To be really honest, the mistakes pointed out could have been pointed out by somebody experienced only.
On the other hand, I was only like 16–18 months in the job.) R’s act left me embarrassed. He not only did not take responsibility but also passed on the blame. Ideally, he was my manager and I had no business consulting S. R being my manager I should have shown my work to him and he would be the one pointing out the changes and if required discuss with S.
But then the damage was done so I decided to be cautious henceforth. After a couple of months, the next set of changes came in the same product. I was determined not to go to S and not to repeat the same mistake again.
So I went to R and told him about the product change. R as usual asked me to go to S and I denied that. I told him I want him to review the changes before we go to S.
What R did not know was that I had committed a very deep and big mistake purposely.
I knew R would not catch this one. So R tried to act smart and reviewed the change for the sake of it and okayed it. Further, we were to discuss the change with S. R and me went there together and as expected S pointed out that mistake before me and R.
As usual, R tried pushing this stuff on me (of course I am to be blamed for the mistake I did on purpose) but this time I was determined to give it back to R. Below is the conversation as far as I remember.
S to R – ‘So, why have you added the XYZ component in this. This won’t be given in the said config and you should know this.’
R to me – ‘Why have you added this component? Don’t you know what S is saying?’
Me to R- ‘Sir I am new to this job and team as good as a fresher. I do not have any authority here. The things I have done are to my knowledge and I am ready to rectify my mistake. That is exactly the reason why I had discussed this change with you before coming here and you had okayed it.’
R (in shock)- ‘Yes, but in this case, it’s your fault.’
Me to R – ‘I agree it is mine but then it was overlooked by you too. By any means, I am not to take any decision on my own. I am in this organization for almost 1.5 years.
You on other hand have completed more than 25 years, so how can I make a mistake and you couldn’t point it out?’
S who was listening and enjoying the conversation broke in. He came to know that this was done purposely by me but did not break that out.
Perhaps he was enjoying it coz he wanted to pin down R.
After our meeting, S Called me up and told me, ‘I already know you did this on purpose but yes I understand why you did it and so I did not want to spoil the fun.
I was enjoying R getting exposed.’”
5. Annoying Neighbors Find Out What I Did To Their Mattress
“I moved into a flat in a town where I knew no one, just for the fun of it. I worked from home, it seemed like a nice enough town.
I discovered after several months of stress-free living that I had not had any neighbors, which I learned by… well, by getting neighbors.
Only on one side, I met the lad as he was moving in. He seemed nice, a bit wet, but nice enough.
Pretty soon after he moved in, so did his friends, who clearly took advantage of him being a wet fart of a personality.
I’m not exaggerating when I say there must have been 25 kids sleeping there of all ages, from about 8 up to 18.
The dance music went on into the night, as did the shouting. On the one night, it was quiet, it was because he was out; when his friends came back, they handbrake-turned into the car park with the loudest music I have ever heard from a car.
They just didn’t want me to sleep, it seemed.
It went on. They started dealing from the flat. Out of the window, from the first floor (second floor, US readers). They were not subtle. I was getting pretty annoyed, to say the least, though they were always careful to be pleasant when they saw me in person.
One day, it was very sunny and warm out. They took a single mattress outside and lay on it in the car park. I walked by on my way to the pub to get enough to sleep through their nonsense. We exchanged pleasantries.
On my way back from the pub, many many beers later, I noted the mattress was still out, and I was desperate for a pee.
I laid it back down and unloaded the result of at least 10 pints worth of beer (not a 10-pint pee, obv, but the last one at the end of a night on the lash). I soaked it. Absolutely soaked it.
The next day, it was another sunny one.
They were outside lying on the mattress again. So I surreptitiously, from my back windows, took photographs, then posted them on my blog with the story of how I had peed all over the mattress the previous night, and what utter jerks they had been.
My blog – which was all about life in the town, written under a pseudonym – was later found by some locals and went through the town like a dose of crabs. Plenty of people read about his urine-soaked mattress, complete with photographs. I’m told they were furious.
Heh.”
4. Closed My Joint Account With My Lying Ex
“My lying ex ended up stealing all my stuff and lying to get a temporary restraining order against me after she got exposed publicly in front of her parents and friends.
I made a police report and she got called out at her work. Since she was outed as a liar at her work and coworkers ended up calling her out on her stealing, she decided to make up a story that I’ve been beating her up for the last four years and got a temporary restraining order on me, making it mandatory to take all my guns away right before I was supposed to move out of Hawaii.
She took all the supplies I had bought to carry me through a few months. I was advised to leave her be and let it go. But it’s the principle of the situation.
I waited almost a year after moving and happened to check out our joint account to make sure it was closed. To my surprise, it wasn’t and she was actually putting her direct deposit into it.
After monitoring the account for a few more months, I found the direct deposit pattern and her bill pattern. I went back and closed the account right after the direct deposit and before her rent and car payments were due. Seeing that her account went almost to zero after those things were paid, I knew she was paycheck to paycheck.
So I received no less than 25 blocked calls and threats. I left the next day and laughed all the way home. I heard she had to go do some extra credit work…normal for her, anyway. That was the best feeling. Even her best friend called me and asked, then wondered why she kept the account open and thought she was stupid for doing it.”
3. I Went Straight To The Project Admin Because My Colleagues Won't Listen To My Suggestions
“Several years ago, I managed a training department in a company that made high-tech training simulators for the military and control rooms of power plants. The delivered products included training and technical manuals for operation and maintenance of the simulator hardware and software.
To enable concurrent deliveries, we wrote our manuals from the same design information that the engineers used.
For a particular project, I assigned a training specialist to create a manual with certain technical data. Unknown to him and myself, the responsible engineer deliberately issued an obsolete version of the data, probably because he had a spare copy not yet thrown away.
I discovered the defect during my final review and begged more time from the project manager to deliver the proper book, but not more budget since I would work on it myself. My request was rejected and I met the schedule by working for free on nights and weekends.
Six months later, karma presented me with an opportunity for revenge. It was common on such contracts for customers to be delivered finalized versions of all technical data approximately six months after customer acceptance testing. My department published some of those technical manuals. Our value-added was to technically edit the documents so that the nomenclature, style, and organization were standardized.
I found a technical description for one software program that was so badly written as to be incoherent and determined: (1) It was authored by the same engineer; (2) he was effectively illiterate in technical writing; (3) no other version existed. I inserted the illiterate document verbatim into the appendix of a related deliverable manual.
I delivered the manuscript to a particularly thorough contract administrator who always read what she issued and expressed my anxiety about the target appendix for which I had no other versions and which needed attention from the only person who could ensure the technical accuracy of any needed rewrite.
Approximately two days later, she rejected the document and told the project manager to get the engineer to fix it.
The engineer was furious with me for including his document. After he vented to me, I went to the project manager and begged that he give the engineer time to rewrite the appendix.
The manager ordered the engineer to rewrite the appendix and ridiculed him for using me to beg on his behalf. After another vent on me, I again begged for more time but was figuratively ejected from the manager’s office. The engineer vehemently demanded that I stop going to his boss.
[I was only trying to get him some consideration denied to me.]
It took the illiterate engineer about three weeks to satisfy the contract administrator to whom I repeatedly expressed my empathy and gratitude perhaps once a week for making sure that only the best products were good enough to be shipped.”
2. Horrible Friend Ruins Her Frenemy's Birthday
“Not me, but an old friend told me this in high school. It made me think of her differently… and not in a good way.
Let’s call her X and her ‘best friend; Y.
X told me that a week or so before Y’s 15th birthday, she was mad at Y for some stupid reason, so she changed Y’s birthday on Facebook.
We went to a high school with ~750 students per class.
I don’t know if it’s because we were in high school or if it was just different times on social media, but back then it was standard to receive literally hundreds of Happy Birthdays on your big day. It didn’t matter how well you knew someone, it was just a common thing to write a quick ‘happy bday’ to everyone whose birthday it was.
Anyways, when Y’s birthday came, no one wished her a happy birthday. Not online, and definitely in person. Only her absolute closest friends knew to wish her a happy birthday. And of course, X made sure to wish her happy birthday online and in-person in order to cover her tracks – a detail she was a bit too proud to include in the story.
The most messed up part is that afterward, X changed the birthday back, and to this day Y still has no idea that it was ever even changed. So instead of looking back and wondering who did that to her, she looks back and wonders why nobody cared about her on her birthday.
X told me this story bc she thought it was funny but it’s clearly some next-level psychological torment that she did for absolutely no good reason. Even if they were sworn enemies, I would have thought that it’s a really low blow to try to ruin someone’s birthday by making them think nobody gives about them.
They were still best friends when X told me this story.
BONUS PETTINESS: Flash forward two years and Y turned in a research paper (which was worth half of the grade that semester) a day late even though it was stressed to us for WEEKS that there would be no late papers accepted under any circumstances.
They were trying to prepare us for college (where late work is totally accepted btw if you play your cards right lol). Despite all of the warnings, the teacher (who was tight with Y) agreed to accept the paper as long as Y didn’t tell anyone.
Y didn’t tell anyone… except for X… who went straight to the principal. X had nothing to gain from telling the principal. The teacher got in a lot of trouble. Y got a zero and had to retake English in the summer. The court of public opinion (i.e. our group of friends) decided that X was a horrible, horrible person for selling out her friend and can’t be trusted. But X tried defending it with some garbage about ‘fairness’ and the ‘principle’ of the whole thing.
Needless to say, we all judged her very hard and she didn’t hang out with us too much after that.
And yes, X and Y are still friends. X was recently in Y’s wedding.”
1. Sweet Revenge Led To Many Problems Later
“I’ve probably exacted a lot of revenge. But I remember once these guys jumped me and my friend, they way outnumbered us. This was kind of normal at the time.
We got jumped alot. I don’t know why. Anyways, I caught 5 of them at sheets and proceed to call them out for their bull (called them not-so-nice names, they did nothing, looking back on it IDK why they did nothing) so we leave and I’m like what when all the sudden they drive by flipping me off….
So I chase them down in my car… they pull over after a few blocks and one guy hops out walking to my car, but… by this point I had a bat in my hand and remember screaming I was going to bash their skull.
He runs back to the car and jumps in. For some reason, the driver didn’t take off so I start beating the crap outta their car. 5 guys in the car peeing themselves lol. That is about all I can remember. They were crammed on top of each other trying to get away from the window.
But this continued and made things worse, I was alone then…. But later I was with the same friend and we spotted 2 others that jumped us at a party….
So we confront them and my friend slapped them allllll the way to the car….
It was hilarious. But one of our friends who wasn’t involved went too far and threw a bottle of booze at their car. Obviously, there’s more to the story but I’ll cut it here. When we walked back to the party we got in a fight… I got hit and needed stitches….
Then we got jumped later that night walking into our apartment. Cars roll up like zombies in the mist…. I turned my back to get the shotgun that was inside, and I guess I got hit and blacked out. Drinking made it worse…. Idk some said it was a golf club against my head but IDK for sure.
Had a bad concussion etc…. Lol and there’s more but I’ll cut it there.”