People Talk About Their Past Revenge They're Still Proud Of Today
24. I Got The Ultimate Revenge
“I went on to have a good life. I was married for a number of years. I thought I had a good marriage. A home we owned together.
A 2-year-old daughter.
Then, I found out my then-wife was seeing someone else. We ended up splitting. Sure. I thought of all these nasty things I could have done. I’m still, 12 years later finding out about things she stole from me when she left… things from when I was a kid… for some reason she deceived me, left me, destroyed our marriage, and blamed me enough to think she needed revenge???
Anyhow, that relationship lasted a couple of months. Then she went onto a new guy, that she is still married to. Through that marriage, he saw other people, and quite honestly, he treats her like garbage and treated my daughter badly, too. Her family hates him.
On the other hand, I have remarried. My daughter loves my wife and would love for her mother to allow my wife to adopt her.
My daughter now lives with me exclusively and sees her mom maybe a few hours a month. I’m remarried and have a son with my wife. We have a nice house, a nice, comfortable life. I’ve gone on and had a good life. I still work at the same job I had, I’ve gotten my degree and my MBA and now even teach on the side.
I’m good at my job and enjoy it. I have a good, successful life. It wasn’t always easy, and truthfully, I wasn’t always magnanimous about it. And God only knows how many times I have plotted to ‘get back at her’.
The ultimate revenge is to show her what she gave up. Every day, she gets to understand what she had, and what she has.
Both in her marriage and with her relationship with her daughter (or lack thereof).”
23. Had A Favor From A Contractor
“I pulled this on my husband, soon to be ex. We had been married for 15 years. I had just given birth to our second child. I knew he wasn’t happy about our first child and he let it be known he didn’t want the second.
Everything was fine until we had kids, then he started doing his own thing and treating me horribly. I was sick with worry, trying to work, and was taking care of the home and children alone.
One day, I got a call from a guy who told me that he had a Private Investigator follow his wife and my husband. He had proof of their affair and his evidence fit.
I believed him. After a long talk, he said that he wanted to save his marriage and asked what he could do to break them up.
I told him – ‘Simple! My soon-to-be-ex ( I knew I was done at this point) is a big coward. You just need to call him and scare him.’ He said, ‘I can do better than that.’
This guy was a building contractor.
He loaded a bunch of the biggest guys on his crew in his truck and they were waiting to catch my ex at his favorite hang out. He flew home that night – frightened out of his wits. The first time we had seen him before 9 PM since the baby was born. He wanted all the doors and windows shut that night. The next morning, he woke up to all the blinds and windows opened. I had pulled his truck out of the garage and into the front yard so my son could ride his trike.
This really put him in a panic! He also wanted the phone off the hook, but somehow it was hung back up. He jumped every time it rang. I actually got my sister to call and hang up several times.
The contractor called to thank me and asked if he could do anything to help me. I had one favor to ask. He said with pleasure.
When we went to court to split, my attorney presented all of the evidence collected by the private investigator. My ex had no idea this was coming and his attorney sat down and put his hands over his eyes.
Revenge is a dish best served cold.”
22. She Froze All His Belongings In Thick Ice
“Coworker decides to give on-again-off-again significant other another chance. The boy is sly, buys girl diamond earrings for Christmas, tries to woo her, make up for wrongdoings.
The couple goes out for New Year’s Eve. They go back to an apartment (his or hers I can’t recall) and party with friends. Partway through the night, he disappears. Comes back with another girl… let me rephrase… comes back kissing another girl. Yes… BROUGHT HER TO THE PARTY.
Coworker decides to keep her cool. Obviously embarrassed and fuming – but instead of making too huge a scene, leaves the party.
The next day, a cold, cold, cold winter day, as he continues sleeping in with the girl, a coworker arrives with all of his stuff and buckets of water (think gigantic water tank full). She carefully lays all of his clothes and belongings all over the car and dumps buckets of water on them. She freezes all his belongings in thick ice to the car, windshield, back windshield, windows, mirrors, tires, all covered with frozen clothes.
She leaves him a note, letting him know that she returned all of his clothes and that she’d give him back the earrings too but she sold them for $5 to another coworker (she totally did this, because the other coworker admired them, they were friends, and it would annoy him knowing he spent all that money). Because he had no way to drive away to warm up the clothes and get them off, she had managed to find a clever way to break up with him and return his stuff most inconveniently without actually getting in trouble for damaging it.
When he came into the store, she had the coworker who bought the earrings tell him that she wasn’t there, wearing the earrings in all their shiny glory.”
21. Karma Stood In Her Way To Getting Hired
“I had moved to another state to take a job as a manufacturers representative. My largest customer had a female purchasing agent. I met with her to discuss issues they had with some billings. It was a large amount and it was interfering with us doing more business.
I painstakingly cleaned up all the problem invoices. I took their salesperson to meet a large customer she couldn’t get into and got her orders. I flew the salesperson and her new customer to our production plant first class. They were both excited they had never flown first class. They met with our product development people and made some changes to our product with their recommendations.
It was a big deal making both of us money. I saw the purchasing agent and she said so what you solved those problems we have some equipment that needs parts and they were back-ordered on a very hard to get a product we made. I helped fix the equipment problem myself. I arranged a deal to get her 40 of the products she wanted by giving a deal to one of my customers to get the next batch.
It was a five hundred thousand profit deal for them. Again I was feeling like I couldn’t be doing a better job.
She had complained about me to my boss. When he came into town I brought him to see her thinking she would concede I had gone to much extra effort to take care of them. I asked her if I hadn’t cleaned up the invoices, get them a new major account making them a lot of money, and brokered a deal to push them to the front of the line.
She said yes but your competitor went into one of the customers and talked them into buying $1100 worth of their products. She would have to stock their products now.
My boss became annoyed with me about how I could let this happen. He was obsessed about this nothing order when I was killing it. So she still screwed me. I asked her why she had been such a jerk to me.
It was because I brought everyone pizza, to the salesperson to our plant, and out to dinner but never did anything for her. I had gotten the impression she would have been offended if I did that. Which was probably stupid to not have done on my part.
A recruiter contacted me to go to work for a better company that had a better reputation.
I took the job. When I talked to my manager he asked me why I would leave. I told him I don’t need myself busted over an $1100 deal. He was speechless and realized his mistake. Revenge one.
After working for the new company for a few years I went to visit one of my friends who was operations manager for a large pharmacy company. He and I had been friends for a long time along with other higher-ups in the company.
When I came into their office, who should be there but the purchasing agent who had badmouthed me. She was all nice to me like we were good buddies. I went into my friend’s office. He asked me how I knew her. I told him. He was thinking about making her the corporate purchasing agent. He asked my opinion. I told him my story and how she had treated me.
He didn’t hire her. Instead, she went to one of the podunk retail pharmacies to do their inventory, orders, and ring customers’ purchases up. It’s called karma.”
20. I Spilled The Secret Of Our Potato Salad
“I was asked to interview for a position at a small deli when I was eighteen. The interview was not an interview at all. I was offered the job immediately and was thoroughly confused as to why.
Fast forward a few days. My boss was shocked and agitated to learn that I did not speak Spanish.
That sure would have been a GREAT question to ask during my non-interview interview, especially since I had zero reasons to think that I needed to be bilingual to take the job.
Three weeks after that, my boss came up to me and said, ‘I met your Mom at the hospital today. She was in the meeting we catered. She doesn’t look like you.’ Her eyes were incredibly narrow and she was scowling.
I just stared at her. Then, the other shoe dropped.
BOSS: ‘I am not racist, Andrea. My family is very diverse. I have a lot of white family members, too.’
ME: ‘I never said you were racist. What does this have to do with you meeting my Mom?’
BOSS: ‘Your Dad’s at least Latino, right?’
ME: ‘No.’
BOSS: ‘What is he?’
ME: ‘My Dad.’
From that point on, she made my time there hateful. She wouldn’t let me split tips or keep my own. She would scream at me constantly. She was rude to my Mother and Grandmother when they came in, SPENT MONEY, and immediately left. She – and this is the owner I am referring to throughout all of this – spread rumors to the rest of the employees.
A girl with who I was friendly was kind enough to inform me that I had apparently ‘tricked (boss lady) into thinking (I) was Latino to get the job.’
I realized then that I was the only person working there not of Latino descent. Apparently, she assumed that I WAS Latino and otherwise liked me. Poof! Instant job.
I had already experienced my fill of bigotry in my short life and I resented this woman to no end, particularly since I saw her as a fellow minority.
You see, I had this silly Utopian idea that we minorities should all love and support each other because we all face racial bias and it sucks! I hatched a revenge plan in about three seconds flat.
The next day, during the lunch rush, I was commanded to make the potato salad just as I had been the three days prior. This was easy since it was Reser’s brand and I simply had to scoop it out of the carton and into a bowl so we could continue to keep up the lie to customers that it was homemade.
Boss insisted on this.
This place had a TON of regulars and many of them were present. Let’s say at least a dozen… in a small town… where most folks worked at the same hospital and knew each other by no more than two degrees of separation.
I took the huge carton of store-bought potato salad up front, asked for everyone’s attention, and said, ‘This potato salad was homemade with love at a Reser’s plant near you.’ I slammed the carton on the counter as hard as I could for emphasis and walked out.
I was beaming when I stopped by to pick up my last check a few days later.
The right thing to do is to say that I regret it. I do NOT. I would not do it again, but that is only because my now 35-year-old conscience would not allow me to. She should not have been a bigoted witch. She should not have hired me based on assumptions about who I was.
She should not have punished me for failing to live up to her assumptions. She ESPECIALLY should not have treated my Mother and Grandmother like dirt… and she should not have forced us to lie to customers about that potato salad dozens of times every day. Reser’s is not that bad! Why couldn’t she have just been honest? Better yet, my beautiful white Mom who was apparently not good enough makes the best potato salad I’ve ever had.
She would have happily taught Boss Witch the recipe.”
19. I Don't Have To Know California Law
“I had a friend who was really down on his luck. He had helped me out a few times in the past with handyman stuff – but now was flat on his back. His wife had left him, he had no job, basically, he had the clothes on his back and a little more. I had just gotten a job on the other coast and I needed someone to watch the place while I had it up for sale – so I made a deal with him.
I said you live in the house, keep it clean, make it available when the realtor has somebody for a showing – and you can live in it for free – and I will give you a couple of grand when I sell it. OK, good deal! So I pack up and I move to Virginia.
One day I got a call from the listing agent and she says to me – Robert I can’t show your home anymore because of the condition.
I said what are you talking about!?? What ‘condition’? She tells me the house is completely filthy. There are diapers everywhere there are dog feces everywhere, plus a menacing dog – it can’t be shown.
Now you have to understand I’m a meticulous person – this house was spotless – it was a showcase, it was a jewel! This friend that I was helping out with was single, he had no dog, he had no baby.
I don’t know what’s going on so I get in touch with him and I tell him of the realtor’s concern and he says to me ‘so what are you gonna do about it!?’ I said what!?? What are you talking about – what do you mean what am I gonna do about it!? He says I know California law if you don’t stop harassing me I’ll get an injunction against you.
You should stop harassing me and he hung up on me. I tried to reach him a few more times and he kept saying you’re harassing me – stop bothering me – I know California law you don’t. At this point, I’m thinking about the movie Pacific Heights. You may remember in that movie based on a true story, a similar situation in California existed where the renters were dismantling the place and the owner could do nothing about it and he ended up losing the house to them.
What is it they say – possession is 9/10ths of the law!!?
He was in possession – and I was becoming possessed.
I try and I try to beg him to be reasonable – to remember our agreement – to remember our friendship… nothing matters he has the house I can just go and shut up about it.
Mistaking kindness for weakness is the single stupidest mistake anyone can make with me.
I call up my friend who’s a contractor up the street and I tell him the situation and I said please go down there, when he’s not there, seal the front door shut with three penny nails all around so that no human being alive can open the door. He does. This creep that’s living in the house starts entering the house from downstairs through the underground.
I said okay please go back and since it’s winter in the mountains (at 6200ft – snow ski level) take out the expensive key components of the heating system so he will freeze. He does.
No matter – he’s still in the house with no heating! What am I going to do – I’m freaking out – I have no idea how to get rid of this creep and all the while he’s threatening he’s going to take my house – which I knew happened to Michael Keaton!
I’m at work in DC and get a call from my previous neighbor who lives below my place on the mountain. He says breathlessly, ‘Robert I’m watching your house burn – the fire engines are on their way!’ Sure enough, I hear the fire engines in the background!! Well, you can imagine I was at work and my heart is now pounding out of my neck and there’s nothing I can do.
Was this twisted maniac burning me out!!??
They put it out. The roof of the house is completely burned away. Open to the sky. What wasn’t burned to cinder was water destroyed. Everything was completely soaking wet and because it was winter in the mountains it was also frozen solid. I thought well okay at least he’ll move out now! No – he doesn’t move out, he is still living in the frozen solid house – no gas – no water – no roof – but he still living in the house – and the insurance company couldn’t do an estimate because he wouldn’t let them in (through the now fire axed opened ‘door’).
He will not vacate. He’s like a flesh-eating bacteria in my brain.
Keep in mind he’s in California and I’m in DC. So I call the County office of Building Safety and explain the deal. Creep, threats, living with no roof, no gas, no electric – frozen. They say – how can we help? I say – please condemn my house as unfit for human habitation.
I believe it’s a danger and hazard to the community. They promise if what I say is true – it will be posted.
They do. A big orange sticker – with a seal across the axed door. No Entry – Danger – Unfit for Human Habitation.
He stays.
So I call a guy I know who wears a badge and he says – if your place is posted, I will watch him move out within 30 minutes and tell him if he returns he’s getting arrested.
The jerk left and filed bankruptcy so I couldn’t come after him. I got an estimate to rebuild from my three-penny nail friend, and he got the contract from the insurance company.
The very first person who saw the rebuilt home bought it at full price.
It burned because the idiot ran an extension cord from the main house – outside through the snow and into the detached garage to a second refrigerator (probably contained a severed head).
The cord shorted and lit the all-wood garage and house on fire.
Oh – and in that garage was the one thing that maniac treasured…. an original mint condition Shelby Cobra car. 998 were ever assembled from 1961 until 1968. The first made sold for 13 MILLION dollars.
I called him and asked if he wanted me to add it to my insurance claim – but before he could answer I said – ‘You don’t know California law – I don’t have to.’ And I hung up.”
18. She'll Smell The Dump Every Time The Amp Heats Up
“This wasn’t me but an old co-worker of mine. When I was just out of high school I got a job installing radios and alarms into cars.
There were about 5-6 guys in total working in the install bay to where the sales guys (from the air-conditioned sales floor inside the building) would bring us the products to install, along with the cars keys after having sold something.
It was no secret that John, a sales guy in the store, had a jerk significant other and he was always in a bad mood and taking antidepressants due to the way she treated him.
One day John was really upset and told us his girl broke up with him because he didn’t have a ‘real’ job and didn’t earn enough to support her I.e. he wasn’t a ‘real man’… I guess the breakup was pretty nasty and just to prove a point, about 3 weeks later she made sure he was working and drove to the store in a new Lexus her new ‘rich’ man bought for her.
They both went in and asked for ‘John’, her ex, to sell them the most expensive amplifier, for which the new guy paid in cash.
The girl had an enormous, smug smirk on her face the whole time and then said loud enough for everyone to hear ‘let’s go eat a nice lunch while they help make my new car loud’… and then they left for about 2 hours.
John had told them that the amp must go under the passenger seat due to the car being a convertible and not much space in the back. They agreed.
We were pretty amazed at the poker face John kept the whole time but then he came back to the install bay with the amp (known amongst us it tends to really heat up and it was summertime)… He puts it on our bench and says ‘you guys mind if I install this myself?’
‘Sure,’ we all said while grinning.
There was an apartment complex next to the store where all the people with dogs would take them and have them p******e on the grassy patch between parking spots behind the store. Of course, not everyone picked up their dog’s poo.
John went out there, picked a nice, fresh but smaller turd from the grass, came back.
He took the seat out, wired everything into the amp’s place but before mounting the amplifier, he carefully placed the dog turd in the middle of the carpet and then carefully placed the amp on top, then screwed it down…
I didn’t find out what happened afterward, only saw her come back, grab the keys and drive away with her new man, blasting the radio.
I’m sure the smell caught up eventually every time the amp would heat up..”
17. Office Bully Got All Of His Clothes Burned
“When I was working in a lab in MD on an important project, I had someone there harassing me. It was not physical harassment, just workplace hostility.
The first thing he did was try to get me fired because he screamed at me as loud as he could. I think he was afraid I would go to HR so he struck first.
Let’s call him Dude as his name. Dude was in the hood working while I stood off to the side waiting for him to finish so that I could determine some information on sampling.
If he did sampling I had to be ready with chemicals to detox his highly toxic waste once he prepped the sample for the Gas Chromatograph. It had to be done immediately after prepping. He finally turned to me and said ‘What do you want Kruba?’ I asked him if he would be going out to sample today. He turned to me and started screaming at me as loud as he could.
I had quit smoking two weeks before that. After he finished berating me and calling me one name after the other, I started crying and went outside to smoke.
He reported me to HR and I had a meeting with the bosses and him. They felt like his claim was frivolous at best. How was I supposed to do my job if I couldn’t communicate with him?
There were too many witnesses for him to lie. Other employees had told HR how he yelled at me and I did not yell back. My co-workers had my back. They warned him he needed to get along with other employees and they would be watching him. In our line of work, teamwork was a priority. We all had to keep each other safe. This was not what he expected at all.
He thought I would be the one disciplined.
Dude was very upset and took the opportunity to start harassing me. If no one was around, he would whisper in my ear, ‘I haven’t forgotten Kruba. I am going to get you.’ He started stealing my lunch every chance he got. I was on a volunteer safety team. We met once a month at lunchtime.
As a reward, I got to order lunch once a month. I had a family emergency and could not make the meeting. Dude went to the meeting and told them I had asked him to pick up my lunch for me. He took it and ate it himself. I don’t know how he knew I was not going to be there. I definitely did not tell him anything.
We both had a job interview in Utah after we finished the project we had been working on. The company we worked for was committed to finding us all work after the completion of our mission. There were plenty of jobs in Utah and we were not in competition. When he found out when my interview was scheduled, he made arrangements to go before me.
My boss told me about it.
It was the worst interview I have ever had in my entire life. When the interviewers looked at my resume and kept saying negative things over and over again, I knew he had told them some lies during his interview. I could not prove it. Every line on that resume was true and not embellished. I could not figure out what happened. Arguing with the people interviewing me was not going to help.
Dude got one of the positions and I got none.
Now for the revenge part: On the way to Utah, the moving van was involved in a fire and every stick of furniture, every piece of tech, and all of his clothing was burned. Since he was moving right into his new abode, he sent all of his clothes on the truck except for the ones on his back and one change of clothing.
He did not get the funds from the insurance company for months. They gave him the minimum allowed. He refused to buy anything until he got the insurance money. He slept on the floor the whole time.
Dude did not last long on that job. The Company eventually found out who had been embellishing who’s resume. He was a very abrasive individual and eventually he was asked to leave.
The reason I have all of this information is because of my wonderful former co-workers. They also got positions there. They have kept in touch with me via social media. I am still in touch with them today.”
16. "Consider Yourself Served"
“I had been living with my significant other, let’s call him ‘Mike,’ in Santa Cruz CA for almost 4 years. It was horrible. The emotional pain started right away (too long to go into detail). One day he finally admitted he was having an affair, if that wasn’t enough he was “seeing” a lot of guys.
And he wasn’t really repentant. I broke it off immediately but that wasn’t the end of it. He stalked me, threatened my friends, and just generally made life miserable for many people. He would go out on the weekends to get his haircut and then return a couple of days later. However, I was never allowed to go out. (This part is important) After I finally dumped my ex and moved into my own place, Mike came up to me at work (sigh – yes we worked in the same place) and told me about a hangout he had the previous night, how ‘Peter’ was a great man and that they were going to go out again.
First thought ‘What makes you think I WANT TO HEAR THIS??’
A couple of days later I heard through a mutual friend that ‘Peter’ really wanted to talk to me about Mike. I made the time and what I found out was both expected and a complete shock: my ex had hurt ‘Peter’. ‘Peter’ was furious. So I hatched a plan. All the stars aligned and it looked like karma.
As Mike was revving up his next attack and stalking, I got a restraining order then I needed to find someone to serve him the papers. Peter was really adamant that he be the one to serve. I had no problem with that. So, one morning I’m at work and Peter showed up and headed towards Mike. Mike got all cheerful as his victim/significant other showed up at work to see him (cue record scratch).
Peter walks up to him and hands him the papers and says ‘consider yourself served’ and walked off. Oh, the best part? I timed it so that this all occurred on Mike and I’s 4th anniversary.”
15. They Can't Believe I Finished It In 30 Minutes
“This happened when I was working in an airline. Basis promotion, I was transferred to the department which handled payments and liaised with travel agents and online companies for enhancing sales. I was actually promoted thrice within 5 years.
I felt good about working in different departments. General manager Joe introduced me to my new team consisting of four people and one co-manager Sulas. I was eager to start my work. He told me to file an agreement (Between Airline and Agency) per se my understanding on the first day itself. I was more than glad to do it, I was placed with another staff Sylia.
She was working in said department for more than 2 years. The next day, he had a look and agreed it was correct, he asked Sylia to teach me filing, for that we had to download reports from two independent sources, liaise with Agents, take their data, and match.
Sylia said, ‘Be careful, write down everything, I will tell you only once.’
I agreed, she was very fast on Excel, I managed to still write down the max I could.
The next day, I had forgotten a step, I asked her again, she looked annoyed but helped nevertheless. The same task which I did in a full day, she had done in 2 hours flat, I was impressed and told her this. It might have been a couple of weeks when a new type of agreement arrived, she absolutely refused to help. When I went to Sulas, he said, ‘You should know all this, you were promoted, not demoted.’ They both laughed. They humiliated me multiple times but I kept quiet, I knew my time would come.
I checked with a few more people and filed it, I had to wait back almost 3 hours. There were a few more instances like this, I used to watch Sylia’s hands movement to understand the shortcuts she was using. Within a month, I understood the tricks.
Then came the best part, I was working when I could hear Sulas talking to her on phone, She was not coming to work and there was an urgent pay release which had to be done.
I was given the task, I finished it in half an hour and sent it to Sulas. He yelled at me in front of everyone, ‘This report is incorrect, it takes 2 hours to create this payment report.’
‘Are you saying this basis time is taken or output arrived?’ I asked back from my seat itself, my voice loud and clear… He didn’t look pleased. To cut the matter short, he did not accept my report and delayed the payment for the next day when Sylia would come to work.
Sylia as usual took two hours and submitted the report, I was marked in CC, and guess what, all the numbers matched.
Sulas said to Sylia, ‘Ramesh prepared and submitted the same report in half an hour yesterday.’ She opened my report and did complete due diligence, all the numbers were correct, she was sure there would be something amiss (I sat next to her, I knew how she was) finally after not finding anything wrong and with the pain of having to sell kidney she asked, ‘How did you do it in half an hour?’
‘No idea,’ I said and went back to my work, she asked me, again and again, I reverted with the same answer. She launched a complaint against me and Sulas went to Joe with her. They looked very happy when they both came from GM’s cabin. I got a call from GM, I told him all that had transpired, how they mistreated me in the first place, and asked him to validate the same with the other two members (Who too were upset with Sulas over Sylia favoritism), Joe checked with them and they both concurred my version indeed.
He then called Sulas and asked him to come to his cabin. I met him on the way smiled at him and went home. I learned the next day, he was issued the first warning. Neither (Sulas and Sylia) spoke to me except the last day of my work.”
14. The Family Was Driving Around With Baked Onions In The Backseat
“My mom is a traditional woman from Minnesota. By traditional I mean she is very proud of her ability to cook good food and enjoyed feeding her family homemade meals.
Among the other things as well, she is reluctant to suffer ill-mannered or outright ungrateful people. Especially as it pertains to her cooking and the people who have been guests of weekly Sunday dinners that she would make without fail.
Don’t get me wrong. She was always willing to take pointers, advice, and such input from those who had eaten. She would usually agree that there was another way to make whatever dish was being discussed. And, truth be told I heard only one person complain and it was a BLATANT attempt to hurt my mother’s feelings, intimidate her and teach her that it wasn’t her place to be in men’s conversation.
She was a relentless critic of her cooking. She was the hardest critic she had. Personally, I still to this day never had anything that she cooked or baked that was bad because she didn’t know how to make it right. But, I realize also that I am biased.
To her credit, she would remake things that didn’t turn out to her liking or upon realizing there was a mistake somewhere before she would serve it on her table.
She made almost everything from scratch. This means in short that she spent 6 hours every Sunday cooking, baking, and such for everything to be something she could be proud to serve her family and her guests.
Her new husband saw the large family meal (there were 3 siblings plus me at home then, 6 people eating at least 4 side dishes and the main entre, salad, and a pie or cake.
Again, all from scratch) as a reason to NEED to invite his brother, his brother’s wife and family of 3 children to Sunday dinners. My mom hesitated but only momentarily. She never turned anyone away. Not only did the guy show up with his whole family in a Chevette (read as smaller than a VW bug and less power than 2 hampsters on a treadmill) but the kids were dirty and so was he.
Greasy dirty like maybe they didn’t have running water or access to a bar of soap. His wife, to her credit, was visibly embarrassed by the condition of her family. But, as my mom said to me later that first night, ‘That doesn’t make them bad people’. ‘I won’t turn anyone away hungry’. She lived up to that.
Over the course of the next year, there wasn’t a Sunday that went by that they were not in attendance at our table.
There were many cases of highly questionable statements made at the dinner table after Grace was said and everyone dug into the amazing treats, the typical fare of freshly baked bread and rolls, and the seasonal fresh food she was renowned for making so well. Often the statements (invariably coming from the father of three worst children I can remember having to entertain) would make me drop a fork out of surprise.
Followed by a slow head-turn to see if and how my mother was reacting. My step-dad regularly (if not always) cut off his brother’s ghastly condemnations of my mother before he could get them all the way out of his mouth. Presumably, he was doing this to clear more room for the vast amount of food he was shoving in there. My mother smiled patiently, waved off his childish behavior, and said, ‘Some people are unable to be gracious’ when I asked why she would accept the way this buffoon talked at the table.
‘It could be worse. Think of how Nancy (his wife) must feel’.
My step-dad and his brother would retire to the living room after the meal. Typically to watch football or just have inane conversations about how stupid women were in general. Jeff had married Nancy, a woman lightly less intelligent than himself. He used this fact to reinforce his belief that all women are inferior.
On the other hand, my step-dad had married a woman with an IQ roughly twice his and had a hard time holding his own in any regard where intelligence was a factor. Again, his brother used my step-dad’s lack of intelligence as reinforcement of his own superiority. The whole belief was a thinly disguised lack of real or actual intelligence. I was 10 or 11 at the time.
He was not impressive except for his ability to manipulate my step-dad like a marionette doll. Grotesque. But, impressively so.
One Sunday after dinner my mom walks into the living room and things went bad. My step-dad’s brother (Jeff) insulted my mom’s cooking. Not just that he felt it was not suited for a dog or a pig to eat but, if that was what she thought was good he knew an outhouse where she could eat to her fill of similar quality food.
As I said before it was an obvious attempt to get my mother to react badly. She blankly looked at him and said that no matter what he thought of the quality of her cooking his attendance wasn’t welcome for another meal. And, curtly added that if he were so smart then how did it take over 50 meals to figure out that it was so bad?
In no uncertain terms, she told him that he was welcome to go find somewhere else to mooch a meal for 5 people for free. Do not come back.
He turned more colors of red and purple than I had or have to this day seen on anyone. But, she was right. And more importantly, he was wrong.
After a much-heated debate between her and my step-dad later that night (much of which was him screaming at her about imaginary nonsense) she caved and said Jeff and his family could come back and were welcome for Sunday dinner.
She explained the following experience she had the next morning on multiple occasions.
‘On my way to work around 8 am. I was driving down the i-17 freeway. A big truck in front of me swerved VERY HARD and a couple of 50 lb bags of onions, the big white ones, fell off the back of the truck. I knew an opportunity when I saw it. I pulled over to the shoulder IMMEDIATELY’.
She went on to explain that she very carefully went out into freeway traffic and returned to her car with not one but both 50lb bags.
She then put them into her car and drove ‘like a bat out of the underworld’ to the employee parking lot of Gilbert Engineering where Jeff worked. She found his little piece of Chevette car. And, as was customary at that time in Phoenix, Arizona found his windows rolled down.
She proceeded to pull the entire back seat bottom bench piece out completely and placed the two bags under the rear seating positions where the bench cushion foam rubber is the least thick and there is space in between that and the steel body of the car. She carefully made certain that all the seatbelt buckles were as they should be and replaced the bench section.
She said she was amazed they fit. I asked her once if she was worried she might get caught. She replied that there was nothing to ‘catch’ her doing. And, at 8:20 am on Monday everyone was inside working. No one would be leaving or arriving.
So, the next week was pretty uneventful. I as everyone other than my mom was unaware of the gift she had given Jeff.
But, on that Sunday as they left I remember my mom going over to say something to Nancy who was sitting in the passenger seat of that clown car. Jeff’s wife asked her, ‘Karren, do you smell that?’ My mom sniffed the air. Clearly, smelled a faintly pungent odor and said, ‘Smell what?’
‘Nevermind,’ Nancy said. They drove away.
Before two more Sundays would pass I could actually smell them coming before the 3 stroke engine could get them within visible distance.
It became commonplace to see them pulling up with all windows down and each of the four luckiest of them holding their head out the window. There was always one kid in the back who was unlucky enough to not get a window seat.
It isn’t as if Jeff didn’t LOOK for the source of the smell. He had gone through it with a fine-tooth comb.
The problem was that he never considered looking under the back seat. I mean, honestly, who would?
I was present to hear him bellyache to my step-dad regularly,
‘Where do you think this terrible smell is COMING from?’
There were several ideas. Maybe cheap gasoline? Maybe this, maybe that?
This went on for at least 6 months. Jeff was way too cheap to buy a different car.
His was unacceptable as a trade-in now and that meant he would have to pay the whole cost of the next car. Wasn’t going to happen. All of this transpired through the course of a very standard Phoenix Springtime. Continued throughout summer, followed by autumn. If you are not familiar with the summer weather in Arizona specifically in Phoenix I can sum it up:
Does it get over 112°?
Everyday. At least until 6 a.m.
After that 112° wouldn’t be back until well after 7 pm or 8 pm.
It’s the desert. It is comparable to an oven. And, temperatures ROCKET up from sunrise to sunset. Only taking a break (sometimes) late at night to cool down by 5 or maybe 7 degrees.
So, those two bags of onions are baked and fried on the hot metal of the car body every single day for hours as the schlub is working.
He leaves work daily in a freshly cooked rotten onion car that looks like a large kids’ toy. Squeezes his fat body into it and has to drive home with his head out the window the whole way. Probably ate a few bugs that way. But eating bugs is a much better option than the stink inside that car.
I still roll with uncontrollable laughter when I remember the four heads out the windows driving up at unsafe high speeds (as they were very anxious to get out of that car) and the 5 clowns tumbling out so fast you might think it was on fire.
I won’t tell you how it ended. Just know that in my recollection it was ongoing for at LEAST a year. It did end eventually. I will say that. And, not because Jeff was smart enough to look under the back seat. Nope.”
13. He Has Money But I Have Connections
“In college, I started going out with a really nice white girl (actually the last white girl I went out with) and we were exclusive.
Now, I’m in one city, she’s in another for the summer.
I rent a car to visit her. It’s not a bad drive but not a good one so I normally do long weekends there.
Cue her ‘friend’ Michael.
Michael spends the summer telling her how he’s got connections, money, etc. I sensed something was up the first time I met him.
He had this creepy confidence that always rubs me wrong. Something about his handshake, how he looked at this girl, etc. He also keeps pointing out two things that make me want to smack him:
I’m not white, I just can look white, and he can tell I’m not white.
All the Latinos ‘around here’ work in the fields.
So his big thing is his BMW convertible. One of those 4-seaters. I personally can’t stand those things. I have a friend on one of the local town police departments I know run the guy’s plate as a personal favor. Suspicions confirmed, he’s basically living at home, with Mom and Dad, working at Dad’s business.
Had an arrest for check fraud or two.
So he finally convinces my significant other to dump me and be together with him. She actually broke up with me over the phone, and he was coaching her on what to say. He fed her every lie you could imagine. He was going to get her modeling jobs (yeah right), he could pay her college off (nope), he had his own business (dad’s business that he worked at).
Now, he is driving up to the city where the university is located. I see the girl from time to time. Once we’re walking out of the student rec building casually talking, he’s there and gives me this menacing grin, makes a joke about how I’m supposed to be parking cars.
I take a mental note of his plate. Now, I have, through some back channels, access to a chemical compound called cadaverine.
He’s driving up in this BMW every other weekend to see her. Always parks in the same deck, same spot, leaving the top down.
I have my connection get me two large syringes with hypodermic needles and fill them with cadaverine. I’m driving through campus and there’s his car. Top-down.
It’s late at night by the way, very late. Both syringes go into the vents by the windshield and the A/C outlets.
Syringes get dropped into a bathroom on campus with a ‘sharps’ collector after being washed in a campus fountain.
I see the guy again, maybe a month later. Now he’s got a beat-up Dodge neon. Apparently, he’d bought the car with an insane loan (like 96 mos) and while driving home flipped on the A/C since it started raining…
She broke up with him after finding out everything he’d told her was a lie, and he slapped her around for it.
She actually came back to me, asking if I was interested in being together again, I asked her if she at least broke up with him in person.
We never got back together. He got arrested for forging more checks.”
12. Just Waiting For Her Car To Get Paid Off
“I caught my fiancée with some other guy whom she met at the gym. I had built the house we lived in from the ground up, and was smart enough to have bought and installed a surveillance system that not only covered the entire yard but the inside of the house as well.
The system included HD video, audio recording, and even came with night vision. I did not tell her about the system and she never suspected that she was being watched inside the house.
I caught her calling the guy and giving him our address and inviting him over to ‘hook up” in her own words. Everything was caught on camera, with audio to boot, and I made sure to make extra copies and save them as evidence.
The next day, she went to work as if nothing happened. I left for work as I normally do but once I was away from the house, I called my boss and told them I was taking a few days off. I’ve been with this company for over 12 years and was good friends with the owner, so he had no problem with me taking time off.
I waited till she came back to the house to begin my plan.
The first thing I did was to call all her credit cards and cancel them. Since I paid for everything and they were in my name, I had no problem getting those canceled. The next thing I did was to take the money from our joint checking account out to put it into my own personal checking account.
I then collected all of her clothes, jewelry, shoes, etc. and stuffed them into garbage bags, and tossed them into my truck. I had a couple of buddies meet me that morning at the house to help me out.
I also changed the codes to get into the house, locking her out. We finished loading everything into my truck and one of my buddies’ trucks and left the house.
The first stop was at her job where I used the extra key to her car to get in and drive it away back to my house, while my buddy followed in my truck. The car was in my name and I was not going to let her have it.
We then drove to her mom’s house which was about an hour away and left all her stuff on her mom’s porch.
I explained to her mom and her sister what she did and told her that it was over and I didn’t want her in my house anymore.
It took about 20 minutes after leaving her mom’s house before I got the first phone call from my now ex. I ignored her phone calls until about call number 10. By this point, she was screaming at the top of her lungs about her stuff being dumped at her mom’s house.
She demanded an explanation and started threatening to call the police. I laughed and sent her a clip of her video that was caught on the home surveillance camera. Just to be petty, I also sent the video to her mother and her two sisters as well.
The thing really hit the fan when she got off work and discovered that her car was no longer there.
She had to have her mom pay for a Lyft to carry her back home since none of her credit cards worked and her debit card was useless. I continued to receive regular phone calls for the next three to four days which I ignored. I kept her car in the garage where it sits to this day. I’ve driven it a total of twice and I am thinking of selling it once it’s paid off.
She never bothered coming back to the house, and I heard that she had a lot of blowback from her family regarding her extra-curricular activities. She was forced to get a full-time job to make ends meet since she was only working part-time when she was living with me.
I have since moved on and went out a couple of times but I’m holding off getting into something serious until I can find somebody I can truly trust.”
11. Wanna Go Behind My Back And Keep A Folder On Me? Enjoy This Stock Take From Your Nightmares!
“This was a few years ago. I got a job in a cinema, I was 4 or 5 years older than most of my co-workers whom it was most of their first jobs. Having had a couple of jobs previous and a few years of maturity under my belt, I quickly became a very valued employee, so much so, I was given a promotion to Supervisor within 6 months.
The general manager loved me. I was a Swiss army knife. I would take care of projection duties when the projection manager was at our other sites. I dealt with the busy periods very calmly and was able to diffuse potential situations into getting worse. I was very good at my job. I would be “in charge” of the building when whatever manager was there had to step out.
We had one GM and four floor managers. They all liked me because I made their jobs a lot easier. When I was working they didn’t have to work as hard and when it wasn’t busy, they didn’t have to work at all.
Two more years go by and one of the floor managers says she’s leaving in 3 months. Without having to say it, I know I’m going to get her position.
They always hire internally and I am head and shoulders above my co-workers.
This is where it gets interesting. Let’s call this floor manager, Blobby. So Blobby does a stock take every Thursday. I always worked Thursday mornings in projection so for the last couple of years, I had a standing arrangement to drink with my pals on a Thursday night. I loved my Thursday drinks.
I worked most weekends so this was my Saturday night.
One Thursday I’m doing my projection checks and the GM says that Blobby is sick, would I be able to do the stocktake? Ok, I’ll do it, a 9 am to 11:30 pm (we have to count the stock at retail after we close hence the late finish) it’s a horrible shift but the brownie points are worth it.
So next week comes along and instead of doing my projection shift on Thursday, I’m in to do a stock shift. I ask the GM what’s going on and he said Blobby requested me in. Even though the GM and I get on really well, he’s gonna side with his manager over his supervisor. I explain I go out Thursday nights and Blob says, “Listen dude, I’m actually doing you a favor.
When the manager job comes up and you know how to do the stocktake and orders it will look fantastic and you’ll 100% get the job.”
I grit my teeth and go along with it. It makes sense to learn another avenue of the job. So Thursday nights come around and Blobby sits at his desk with his feet up while I basically do his job.
It’s not a difficult task and after a month it’s a piece of cake.
Let me paint a picture of Blobby. He’s short, fat and balding. Ear pierced, thinks he’s cool but he really isn’t. Think David Brent from the office. Keep him on your side and work is a lot easier because he can be quite petty but what he did next was far from petty.
3 months go by and we’ve one week left before our manager leaves. They start the interview process but for some reason the owners decide to sit in and do the interviews. Really strange!
So the interview starts and I’m hit with “How do you expect to be our manager if your timekeeping is so poor?” They have a list of times I clocked in late.
5 minutes here, 7 minutes there. The thing is, timekeeping wasn’t an issue. You come in late the odd time and then if they needed you to stay back, most would. Take a penny leave a penny scenario. But these guys go to town on me! They have surveillance footage of me taking in a delivery (which isn’t part of my job) without wearing a hi-vis jacket.
“Your complete lack of concern for safety regulations is appalling.” Emails from a few irate customers over the years that complained about me, I did the right thing in all those circumstances but taken out of context, looks like I was in the wrong. I gave up fighting my corner. I know I’m not getting this promotion.
My co-worker got it. If it wasn’t me, I was happy it was her.
She was also very good at her job and would no doubt make a fine manager. So after giving so much for the company over 3 years I found myself doing things half-baked. Why go the extra mile when it wasn’t appreciated?
So I’m still on stock duty on a Thursday night. While Blobby is down dealing with a customer, I’m in the office inputting the stock figures.
I accidentally close the program. I open “Blobby’s folder” where the program is and see a file saying “discrepancies.” I don’t know why clicked in but I did. I see my name “OP’s folder” of course I’m going to click in and see what’s going down in funky town. I’m shocked! There are about 5 subfolders in my folder. “Lates”, “Dangerous Delivery”, “Potential Stealing”, “Associates” and “Hungover”!!
We’ve already talked about Lates and DANGEROUS DELIVERY! The stealing one is me leaning over a closed till but looks like I’m trying to hide something (which I wasn’t). Utter nonsense. “Associates” is pictures of me standing with my co-workers chatting when it wasn’t busy and “hungover” was screenshots from my social media when I was out the night before and then I’m at work the next day.
It was clear as day that this moron handed this information to the owners.
Finishing up that night was so tough. I wanted to rip that earring out and pop his baldy head like a pimple but I played it cool and finished my shift. Monday comes around and I ask to talk to GM. I explain what I found and it’s really serious because it’s an invasion of privacy.
CCTV should only be used to review footage when something goes wrong, not used to stalk me! The GM says he only found out after the interviews were over. The reason he didn’t do them was because he too was leaving. He was a good man and didn’t mess around. He said Blobby hated me, don’t know why but he was always bringing up issues with me.
He then recommended I get a new job because more than likely Blobby was gonna be the new GM and my life there would be unbearable if he got it.
So I talk to my brother and sister who are a lot smarter than me about what roads to go down. File a complaint? What’s the point when the owners used his dossier against me.
Bring him to court? Too much hassle for very little payoff.
If you’re still reading I applaud you! High five! This is where it gets fun. Blobby wants the GM position more than anything. He has a bit of competition but he’s the front runner. I could spend the next two months looking for work or could be ambitious and try a bury this piece of crap.
I chose the latter!
So I’m drinking with my girl one night and we’re joking around about how to get revenge. She scared me a little with her suggestions. Some tame ones like key his car and then a straight jump to “burn his house down.” If any authorities are watching, we were only joking!
And just like that fat boy signed his own death certificate.
Whilst I’m on the stock shift he makes a passing remark. “We have to start nailing this stock takedown to the last popcorn kernel. The yearly stock take is in 6 weeks and (the owner) is doing it and she’s a ball breaker.” I know all about her, she ripped me to pieces in the interview.
“Don’t worry Blobby, OP is on the case, those numbers will be perfect,” and he goes for the oscar with this line “You’re a good worker, it’s a travesty you didn’t get the manager’s job, but when I get the hot seat you’ll be made a manager as soon as a position comes up.
No interview required.”
What a loser!
I’m so good at the stocktake that he doesn’t even check my work. I’m making the orders and counting the stock. So over the next 6 weeks, I start to mess stuff up! I put the orders in on a Wednesday for our Friday delivery. I normally eyeball it and see what movies are coming out and we always had a nice bit of stock on hand.
Not too much, not too little. That’s about to change. I start adding 25% to every order we get in. I show Blob the dockets, he signs them, happy days. Then when I’m doing the stock on the Thursday I put in that we ordered our usual amount. The system balances on the computer but what we have in the stock rooms is a lot more!
I do this for the next 4 weeks. I’m royally messed if he ever actually looked in the stock rooms. They’re nearly exploding with product! Lucky for me and unlucky for him, he’s a lazy poop!
It’s the last week before the ball breaker does the end-of-year stock take. I balance everything on the computer as usual, before we call it a night I tell him to check the presales tomorrow.
We’re gonna have a busy weekend so I say to him “email our suppliers and get a bit extra, it will all get used anyways and we’re looking perfect on the stock count.” Granted I’ve been adding on 25% for the past month or so but he goes ultra blobby and sends out an emergency email to our suppliers asking could they double the standing order for tomorrow!
Checkmate!
When I get home that night I type up my resignation letter. I ask the GM who has a couple of weeks left if I can leave immediately due to unforeseen circumstances. He agrees because he’s a good man and gives me his personal number and an amazing written reference, wishes me the best and thanks me for all my hard work.
Like Andy Dufrense, I’ve crawled through a sea of poop and came out clean on the other side!
I confide in one of the regular workers what I’ve done over a couple of pints. He said the next day when the delivery came, they couldn’t fit it all in the 4 different stock rooms. Rule of thumb would be about 3 weeks stock on hand. We must have had about 8. Now I know you’re gonna say I’m really hurting the owners. I’m not, all of the stock will be used. Except for maybe a few bags of popcorn that will expire everything else will get sold for an exorbitant profit.
Word on the g*******e was that the yearly stock take went into the wee hours off the morning. 3 am to be precise. Blobby was boxed in. The stock was a cluster mess. Tens of thousands of Euros off. He could take the blame himself and look incompetent or say I did it, to which he looks worse considering he was behind the dossier to slander me.
I don’t know what he did. All I know is he didn’t get the GM position and within 6 months was working selling furniture! I never spoke to him about it but one would hope he knows it was me who got him good!”
10. Harass People In The Office Because You're Senior And Because You Can? See You Never
“A few years ago, I was working in a job I really enjoyed with a team I really gelled well with. There were about five of us working on the same portfolio of projects in different roles, and every single team member was just cream-of-the-crop, incredibly good at what they do.
I can’t overemphasize how satisfying it was to work with such an incredibly competent, likable group of people. In this job, instead of getting the Sunday night blues, I would get excited thinking about the work I would be doing the next day and planning how we would solve the complex problems together. It was like a series of logic puzzles. (Yes, I realize I’m a huge nerd.
I promise I also had a life outside of work.)
The one downside (there’s always a downside) to this job was Steve. Steve was not in the supervisory line for me or any of my team members, but he was about three levels above us and very senior. He’d been there for years and was tight with senior leadership. Steve was also a mega-creep.
He said extremely inappropriate things to young women in the office, and he apparently wasn’t averse to being handsy, though as far as anyone knew, that was as bad as it had gotten. The women in the office all knew to steer clear of him. My first week on the job, the whisper network made sure I knew: never be alone with Steve. Harassment is difficult to document, and no one wanted to risk their career and put a target on their back going after a big guy like Steve, so he just got away with it for years.
So for a couple of years, I followed this advice. There were a few instances of Steve saying incredibly uncomfortable things to me in passing, but for the most part, I managed to avoid him. Then I found out that my teammate Rob had gotten on Steve’s radar. For context, Rob is non-neurotypical and has some minor tic-ish behavior. He’s also shy and easily spirals into social anxiety when put in uncomfortable situations.
So one evening at our team’s informal weekly happy hour after work, Rob lets it slip that Steve’s been giving him a hard time. The rest of us are like, “Whoa, wait, what?” because Steve never interacts with staff at our level, except to creep on women, and we basically make Rob tell us everything.
Basically for the last few weeks, Steve has been bullying Rob, making fun of his tics, and mimicking his way of speaking back to him.
He’s also been asking Rob how he can possibly be competent to do his job and implying he’s a pity hire. It’s clear Steve is seeking out Rob for this, because, again, there’s really no reason for him to interact with our team. Rob has been having horrible anxiety over this situation, and has had bad insomnia and stomach issues since Steve started targeting him.
And not that it bears repeating, but just to reiterate, Rob is a beast at his job. And a genuinely good guy.
I leave the bar fuming just thinking, OK, that’s it. Forget you, Steve. You’re going down. At this point, I’m seeing red. (We all were.) We tell Rob to go to HR, that his neurological issues put him in a protected ADA class, that he could get Steve in big trouble.
Rob panics and says he can’t do that, begs us not to tell anyone at work, and says he wishes he hadn’t said anything. We assure him we won’t say anything if that’s what he wants, but we’re all very distressed.
I can’t tell anyone about what’s happening to Rob, because I promised him as much, so I start my own paper trail.
I start baiting Steve. And I don’t mean I behave in any suggestive manner or lead him on: I just stop avoiding him, and I even initiate contact myself.
I IM him through the company’s IM system very professionally/politely asking if a big client will be staying on through the next project cycle, and the floodgates open. He starts sending me outrageously inappropriate IMs. I mostly don’t respond, but I occasionally keep him going by sending extremely literal responses to his innuendo-laden questions or pretending not to understand something suggestive he’s saying.
Sometimes when he clarifies, I’ll outright say, “This isn’t appropriate” or “this is making me uncomfortable,” or “please don’t say things like that, Steve,” but he steamrolls right over me. During this time, I’ve also been seeing him more in-person around the office, and he often says gross stuff to me in person as well, a lot of it not just inappropriate, but bizarre and nonsensical (“Is it legal to have a butt like that in that skirt?” Lolwut?) Every time this happens, I immediately go back to my desk and write down what he said, the date and time, and the names of any witnesses.
After about a month and change of this, I compile my creep journal with printouts of the IM conversations and take them to my HR rep. I ask to file a harassment complaint against Steve. As soon as the words “harassment” leave my mouth, my rep instantly gets the head of HR and two other reps, and they go through my evidence with me and ask me a ton of questions.
The head of HR assures me they’ll take my complaints very seriously, and asks if I know of any women around the office who have had similar issues with Steve. I’m able to give them several names.
They send me on my way, and two weeks later, my rep formally reaches out to me and lets me know Steve has been let go.
Much jubilation is had around the office!
It took a couple of months for me to piece together the whole story, but basically, after my complaint, HR started following up with the names I gave them, both the witnesses to my in-person encounters with Steve, and the other women he’d harassed. They corroborated what I’d told HR, and then through them, word started spreading around the office that HR was conducting a harassment investigation against Steve.
This emboldened at least 15 different women who’d been biting their tongues about Steve for ages to come forward and tell their own Steve stories. The worst story was from a junior staff member who Steve had assaulted at a company party the year prior.
During all of this, IT had been asked to go through Steve’s emails and IMs, and this had not only been used to validate my printouts as legitimate, but IT had found a ton of additional incriminating stuff in Steve’s correspondences.
Somewhat frustrating: Steve received an extremely generous severance package as part of his termination. But on the bright side, word got around the industry quickly, and Steve was poison at that point. No company would touch him with a 10-foot pole. The last time I thought to snoop on his public social media pages, he was listing himself as an “independent consultant” in our industry, which I seriously doubt he’s actually doing, and based on his public social media page, he’s doing a couple of MLMs, so that should kill off whatever savings he has in short order.
I don’t work with Rob anymore, but I did recently attend his wedding! He’s extremely happy with his new wife (who is a sweet and lovely woman) and he’s doing really well in his career.”
9. Do Nothing, Stop Interfering And You Can Still Keep Your Job
“I am a professional attorney wrangler for a big legal firm. If you’ve watched Suits, I’m Donna if she was wound tighter than a child’s music box. As a legal admin, I have to keep a tremendous amount of information straight.
Every county in every US state has its own court system, its own rules, and its own idiosyncrasies.
I have five attorneys on my team. Despite the TV shows, it’s pretty unusual for a lawyer to have a special secretary all their own unless they are Very Important, so five is a solid number. A secretary that left in January 2020 has not been replaced yet, and I’ve been babysitting one of the partners (Bingley) in the meantime. It’s been a fun learning opportunity, as Bingley works for an entirely different region and type of law than the rest of my team.
Also he has a case where a truck EXPLODED (was empty), which is AWESOME.
My manager (Lady Catherine) is the worst. You know the type – she plays favorites, her best-loved word is no, she MUST be involved in every conversation because she is just that important and necessary. We don’t get along, because I am a stubborn know-it-all who’s been proven right a few too many times.
Highlights include forbidding me from using the same resources other admins had access to, on her orders, including backup admins when my workload was too big and then denying my overtime requests. I literally had no way to do my job some days.
It’s worth noting that the REASON Bingley’s secretary left was specifically because of Lady Catherine. In fact, four additional admins quit over the year explicitly because of her.
Anyway, at this point, I’d been working with Bingley for almost a year. It was November 2020, and we’d settled into a pretty good routine. I’d gotten used to filing pleadings in a different state, and no longer needed to double-check ALL my work for nuance.
Because Law still operates in the stone ages, a few US states still require hard-copy filing. Anything we want the judge to read has to be sent by actual mail, on actual paper, to arrive in the judge’s actual hands.
It’s a pain, most states let you file electronically, but whatever. Bingley mostly only has cases in one of the hard-copy states.
Lady Catherine, in her excessive wisdom, butted in uninvited and instructed me to include a cover letter when mailing a new filing. This confused me, as I had been filing for almost a year and no one, including the admin who originally trained me, had mentioned a cover letter.
I told her this, and she basically told me to******* up. I called the court admin to make sure I wasn’t crazy and that I hadn’t ruined a year’s worth of filings, and the court admin literally LAUGHED and said to please not include a cover letter ever. So I didn’t.
Imagine my surprise when Lady Catherine called me, writing me up for insubordination! Even knowing the court rules and the judge and the court admin explicitly said to NOT SEND A DARN LETTER, she was right because she is ALWAYS right and I am, and I quote, “a disrespectful little poop and she was tired of me.” A warning went into my employee file, pending disciplinary measures.
The next day, she emailed my team telling them to reduce my score on my yearly review, as she KNEW I had been rated too highly for what my abilities REALLY are. It felt to me like she was preparing to fire me by creating a history of poor performance.
Well, if you’re so tired of me, Madam Manager, I can leave!
Within a week of looking, I found a new position.
Now, here’s the issue – I love my team. This is the BEST work team I’ve EVER been on. We take each other seriously and we genuinely love each other. A lot of times admins get pushed around because we don’t have fancy degrees, but not here. Calling in to quit, I cried. I cried a lot. I cried to the point that one of the partners (Bennet) asked if I wanted a counter offer.
I said no, because that wouldn’t solve anything. He asked what I meant.
I told him. I told him about the write-up. I told him how she was trying to falsify my employee review after it had been submitted. I told him the reason five admins had left. I told him about how I wasn’t allowed to ask for help.
At this point, I had given myself hiccups from weeping, and one of the partners on my team (Gardner) was calling him asking if HE and his workload were the reasons I was leaving, so Bennet let me go do other things, like day drink and create a shrine out of legal forms.
I thought it was the end of it, until a friend in another office (Charlotte) called me asking what I was doing, she doesn’t have TIME to train someone into being the new me, and I was the only admin she actually trusts in my office so WHY was I leaving her all alone??? I told her. And she told Gardner. And together they plotted.
First, Charlotte is the manager in her office, so she is on equal footing with Lady Catherine. They also report to the same person. Charlotte called the district manager and told him that Lady Catherine was driving admins away and that the most recent quitter (me) was the only person who knows how to do a LOT of the work on my teams, and my loss was a serious blow.
(Apparently this is true, which is both heart-warming and terrifying)
Meanwhile, Gardner called up a fellow partner and told her that his world would collapse in on itself if I left. He would go to the nearest bridge and jump off it, which would be pretty impressive in a land-locked state. They Had To Do Something.
I got a call the next day from Bennet, saying they had a counteroffer they were really hoping I’d take.
Basically, instead of Lady Catherine, I would report directly to Gardner. Lady Catherine would be forbidden from interfering with me without first asking Gardner for his permission. This solved the issue and I got to stay with my team, so I happily accepted. I thought the debacle was over.
The debacle was not over.
Unbeknownst to me, after looking at the evidence (exit interviews, emails, memos), Bennet put Lady Catherine on a performance improvement plan and she did not get an end-of-year bonus OR raise.
Turns out I had been absolutely correct – Lady Catherine’s behavior and treatment had been the explicit cause that six secretaries quit in less than a year.
I got a call last week from Charlotte. I figured she wanted to gossip about coworkers or rant about how a shared client is a big ol’ headache, but it was actually to give me a heads up.
Lady Catherine had been stripped of her management duties.
I no longer had any contact with her, which was GREAT, but it also meant I didn’t see that her behavior had actually doubled down on the admins unfortunate enough to still be under her thumb. She had missed EVERY SINGLE ONE of the benchmarks on her performance improvement plan. Charlotte had called me to ask my opinion on who should be the new manager, as I know everyone and she was helping cover some things as an outside manager.
Now, I know some of you are thinking “YES! Become the manager and fire Lady Catherine!” But I am not a sadist. I want to stay on my team and do what I do best, which is being a cheerfully annoying RESPECTFUL little poop. I told her one of the more senior admins would probably need some guidance, but would be amazing at it.
NO ONE has to deal with Lady Catherine anymore.
She is now a mere paralegal and not anyone’s manager at all. If she had just left me alone and not interfered where she wasn’t needed, none of this would have happened. All she had to do was nothing.”
8. Super Glue Became My Buddy
“A guy I had been seeing made me feel unsafe. He became physical with me and I definitely did not intend to repeat that. When I immediately dumped him, he left messages threatening to do it again if I didn’t stop telling mutual friends about it. Didn’t stop me, but it seriously raised the threat level from him.
We were both involved in the local ballroom dancing community.
To reduce the immediate threat I switched to a dance studio he never attended. Two weeks later, he showed up at a class while I was there: to avoid him I begged them to let me leave through the office, something normally forbidden. When I explained why they made it clear that he would not be welcome there again. Whew! A safe place! It would be safe later, anyway, but not that night.
I walked out into the cold night air, shaking almost as badly as the night I fled his home, half-exposed and bruised. I wasn’t as much afraid as really, really angry. Fuming. Furious. Enraged. I was trying to keep things low-key and relatively civilized, and he’d managed to intrude on one of my major passions and joys – dancing.
He had bought a brand new awful brown Buick a few months earlier, and it was parked right next to my car in the parking lot the studio shared with the convenience store next door.
Without even really thinking, I went into the store and bought a couple of big tubes of Super Glue. I went back out and Super Glued his every single individual door lock. I really squirted it in good – no half measures here! I glued the trunk lock. I glued his gas cap lock, and the gas cap threads as well. I glued his windows right up under the gaskets, all the way around.
I glued down his windshield wipers. I unscrewed the air caps on each tire, glued the valves, then replaced the caps with a little glob of glue on the threads. I glued the hood latch. I squeezed the little bit of Super Glue remaining into the door gaskets. Then I got into my car and went home.
It was assuredly mean, evil, ill-intentioned… pick your word and I’m sure it applies.
People speak of remorse and shame for such actions… but, my dear friends, I have rarely had such a satisfying experience, and I hope the joy I felt that night stays with me forever.”
7. I Hammered His Phone Line
“In retaliation for an unpaid debt of $150, I wrote a VB6 program that abused one of those fax-by-email gateways to punish a ‘friend’s’ mobile phone. The fax gateway only charged for completed faxes so since his mobile service was unable to receive a fax, there was no financial consequence to me.
The gateway set no limit on failed fax transmissions to a given number, so I hammered his phone line, my app effortlessly queued up thousands of faxes, and the gateway retried each one three times, calling him multiple times a minute, 24/7, for more than a week.
His phone was useless, ringing constantly, assaulting him with the fax modem carrier when he answered. He had like a 10-second window to dial a number and push send before the next fax came in, incoming calls reset any digits he had dialed.
What I hadn’t anticipated was that when he turned off his phone it went to voice mail, which hung up without storing a voice message, but still charged him for a whole minute!
In some cases, he got billed three times in a single minute!
It was absolutely priceless, he called me, literally in tears after 3 days, begged me to make it stop, but still wouldn’t pay me! When I found out, from his parents, who paid his mobile bill, that I had run up a $1000 overage bill, I made it stop as quickly as I could, but there were still a few hundred calls in the queue that was impossible to delete, and they had to endure.
I told his parents what to say to their phone carrier to get out of the bill, I explained the mechanics of the attack, it was a clear case of abuse. They apologized for having raised a jerk of a son. (Given the circumstances I didn’t ask them to make the debt good on behalf of their miscreant son.)
I also notified the fax gateway provider of the vulnerability, and I published the source code for my attack tool 3 months later, when they neglected to correct it.
I wanted to make sure the attack vector was no longer available even to myself. (The temptation to use it again would’ve been too much.)
Amazingly he did finally pay me back 18 months later, brought a bottle of interesting booze as a peace offering, and we shared a laugh (though I’m pretty sure he did cringe a bit.)”
6. I Took My Revenge To Her Grave
“After the death of my Beloved Partner’s mother, we moved into her Dad’s home to care for him. We attended her funeral in the Veterans Cemetery with military honors (she was a WAAC in WWII) and he told my partner ‘When I go, I want to be buried alongside my wife.
Please promise me you will do that.’ and my partner replied, ‘yes, Daddy, I promise.’ I witnessed it. It was a solemn and yet sacred moment. To me, a promise is a promise, and this was one of the most important of all.
We lived there with FIL, for a year. During that year, he had a heart attack and quintuple bypass surgery.
I gave him top-notch nursing care as he convalesced. THEN he did what to me is the stupidest thing a man can EVER do… he went to a heart-attack survivors club… and he ‘met someone’!
‘She’s wonderful! I told her all about my surgery, my house, my income, and how lonely I am… and she is so WONDERFUL!!!’ Now Dad-In-Law had been an Air Force colonel, a physicist, an engineer, was teaching at a local college, and had a slew of pensions, retirement pay, etc. He fell head over heels in love with this woman (I’ll call her GDGD, for Goshdarn gold digger) and she saw him coming a MILE away!
A week after he met her he was all gooey in love! GDGD was ‘the One’ for him! ‘I’m having such a difficult time,’ he told us ‘It is good! I have to take cold showers! But we want to get married as soon as possible! You girls are going to have to move out and find your own place!’ … you see, GDGD wanted him all to herself!
FIL moved OUT of the house, into another apartment (GDGD wanted a place of their own, but he HAD to sell the house, don’t ya know!) leaving us to watch it while it went on the market. When my Beloved’s birthday happened, FIL brought her a card… but when he told us GDGD was in the car outside, naturally we invited her in! ‘No, she doesn’t want to meet you,’ he said.
She wouldn’t speak to us, or even acknowledge that we existed! Same with the rest of his family. She cut them off COLD.
FIL’s grandson suddenly became homeless. He HAD been living with us in FIL’s house. ‘Where will he go in the summer when school’s out?’ Beloved asked her Dad. ‘He can stay in a motel. My sweetheart doesn’t want to see him.’
After a month, they were married. My FIL got rid of EVERYTHING in a huge garage sale. They ransacked the room WE lived in and sold some of OUR belongings too! FIL took a beautiful cut crystal decanter and glasses set that had been a present to me from my Beloved! When I confronted him, he said ‘Sweetheart liked it, so I gave it to her.’ When I said ‘That’s THEFT!’ he replied, ‘Whatever my Darling wants, she gets.’
We moved to San Francisco. Over the course of a few years, we watched in horror as GDGD isolated the formerly gregarious man, separated him from his own family, and grafted him into hers. Her family had a reunion. They flew there. But when his own brother lay dying, she felt ‘too ill to travel,’ and he could not leave her side! Whenever my Beloved called her Dad, SHE was listening in on the extension.
Never speaking, but she monitored him EVERY word. She also forced him to wear a jacket and tie in his own home! He could not relax because she thought short sleeves were ‘slovenly’! FIL was a deeply religious man, and she managed to separate him from his church, where he had attended for several decades! She ‘felt alone’ on Sundays, but would NOT attend with him… so he stopped going.
It all came to a head one day when he called my Beloved ‘I want to talk with you about something… but I feel I cannot tell you over the telephone. I need to see you face to face,’ he said.
So we flew from California to Albuquerque NM, where they lived. Of COURSE, GDGD was right there! She sat, like a silent spider, her eyes NEVER leaving her prisoner/husband, and he of course could not bring up whatever it was that he had wanted to tell my Beloved. When at last he said ‘Darling, I need to talk to my daughter, please can we have a little time to ourselves?’ she replied ‘No. You’re obviously tired, and you need your rest. You can talk to them tomorrow.’ and he meekly replied, ‘yes, Darling.’
And that was that.
The next morning, Beloved called their home to make a lunch appointment with just the three of us. But the phone was off the hook. We waited. 8:00 AM. Phone off the hook. 9:00 AM – 11:00 AM, still that busy signal. Our flight was scheduled to leave at 1:30. The phone remained off the hook! Finally, we had NO more time! We left for San Francisco with my Beloved in tears.
Whatever it was her dad wanted to tell her, we had no more time.
Two days later, after we had gotten back home, my Beloved was at work when the telephone rang. I answered and a male voice asked if my partner was there. ‘It is about (his name). This is the sheriff. He has died, just a few hours ago, and we are notifying the family.’ Naturally, I asked to speak to GDGD.
In the background, I heard her voice ‘NO! I won’t talk to her!’ We were shattered!
She would NOT tell us when or where the funeral was scheduled! My partner was specifically told that she was not welcome at her father’s service. I found the information by calling the newspaper’s obituary editor. The service was to be ‘non-denominational’ when FIL had been a DEVOUT Episcopalian.
He was NOT to be buried by his late wife (despite his specific request to the US to make that so!) AND he was NOT to be given military honors at his burial in a secular cemetery!
My Beloved was torn to shreds. She sneaked into the funeral and sat, hidden, in the back row. Finally, she heard the bitter truth. She was entirely disinherited!
GDGD got the entire estate along with family pictures and mementos. They meant nothing to her. My partner was absolutely UNABLE to keep her promise to her father. She was heartbroken. I was not. I was coldly furious! I am Asatru. I KEEP promises made, and to me, that is a SACRED obligation. That she had been so cruelly deprived of her father’s last words to her, AND of being able to properly bury him was viciously cruel, AND ‘ergi’ (disgraceful, shameful) in Old Norse!
It was my sacred DUTY to somehow save this situation.
I bided my time. Every six months, I would call the apartment building in which GDGD lived, to check on her. I would say ‘This is FedEx, and I have a package for Apartment 210. is Mrs. GDGD in residence?’ or I was a ‘florist’ with a delivery or whatever… every six months I got confirmation from the management that the evil witch was still alive… until one year… she wasn’t!
Strike time!
We moved like lightning! NOW, my partner was next of kin! She spoke to the Air Force. yes, they still had his plot available, with his first wife, my partner’s mother. They would pay for the re-burial. We flew back to Albuquerque and spoke to the priest of the church where he had worshiped for so long. Yes, they would give him a proper memorial of Solemn High Mass.
We then spoke to the crappy cemetery where he (and now the late Mrs. GDGD) had been buried.
On the day of the disinterment, I made my plans accordingly. I wore a beautiful long (nearly floor-length) dark skirt that I had purchased specifically FOR this event. I made certain to have coffee, and a lot of juice for breakfast, and I chugged water several times.
We drove to the cemetery and the Colonel’s ashes were removed. We were horrorstruck to see that he had been buried in a FIBERBOARD BOX!!! A cheap crappy little container. I was seething with fury, and something else, as well.
They removed the box and closed the gravesite. As my partner and the cemetery director went to the office to complete the paperwork, I went and stood directly over the little nondescript plot that now held only the ashes of that vile harridan who had destroyed the final years of a wonderful man.
In the following days, we had the Solemn Mass, the full military burial (with a folded flag, rifle salute, and Taps) next to his first wife in the Veteran’s Cemetery, where he BELONGED, and the proper obsequies observed. It was a wonderfully refreshing thing. We bought a magnificent marble urn for his ashes and discarded the humiliating box. But I digress. Back to that particular day…
I stood over that grave. I spread my feet to about shoulder’s width. It took a moment to savor the action I was contemplating… that I had planned for, for SO long… I had worn no underwear. My long gray skirt easily concealed my stance, full cut as it was.
Slowly, it began. Just a trickle, at first… then, a flood. All the coffee, juice, water, etc flowed in a copious stream as I calmly, but very deliberately PEED all over that nasty dead witch’s grave!
I saved the very last drops for her HEADSTONE! Never in my entire LIFE has a pee felt SO good! And if I’m ever back that way… I’ll do it again!”
5. Get One Of Our Cars Towed? We'll Stalk You And Return The Favor
“This story primarily takes place between me and my stupid neighbor (SN) who is a member of my community’s HOA.
As a bit of background, my three roommates and I moved into a housing community that is basically just a bunch of cookie-cutter townhomes.
All of these homes have garages that open onto streets that wind through the community (this is important later) with your front door opening to a path on the other side of your house. There are also some free parking spots on the edge of the community where there are no houses.
When we first moved in we quickly found out that parking could be a bit of a pain during the day, especially when people had guests during the weekend.
Now my roommates and I admittedly have more cars than the average family. Because we usually have to commute for work we each have one. We try to make parking easier by using the garage but we all have tons of sporting equipment so we can usually only get one car in the garage. When all the parking in all the free spots is full, we’d just park our cars right up against the garage and leave them there during the day or overnight.
We saw other neighbors do it and it still left ample room for people driving on the street to get by.
Well, one day SN comes up while my roommates and I are in the garage organizing some stuff and tells us that we can’t park there overnight as it’s against community rules. Before we had a chance to respond he added “and if you do it again I will personally make sure you’re towed.” His first comment was pretty reasonable.
We’d just moved in and didn’t know that rule. But his second comment really just made him sound like a jerk and wasn’t necessary. One of my roommates simply responded that we didn’t know as we’d just moved in and we wouldn’t park there overnight anymore. Well, SN, clearly trying to assert his dominance, responded with “Good. You better not because I’ll be watching.”
Well from then on we did follow those rules. If we parked in front of our garage during the day we would make sure to move before we went to sleep. This worked out for a while until one faithful day. One of my roommates stopped by quickly after work to grab some dinner and clothes before heading out. This was around 7 PM so he just parked up against the garage as it would be quicker than the parking spaces.
Plus it was early enough that he didn’t think he’d get towed.
Around 8 PM he went to head out and his car was gone. Guess who was there though? SN standing right outside. Immediately he said to my roommates “told you you were going to get towed if you parked here again”. SN and my roommate argued for a bit before my roommate came back inside and calls the car lot.
Well, it ends up they’re closed so he’ll have to get his car in the morning. The kicker? They’re going to charge him an overnight fee. All in all it comes out to $500 which isn’t a small amount for us.
This neighbor has been a jerk to us since we moved in and even though it wasn’t my car that was towed, I took this personally.
To make sure we didn’t get towed again we decided to read the community rules and lo and behold we found out that the street in front of the garage is actually considered a fire lane and no one is supposed to park there at any point during the day. Between SN treating us like crap and the fact that we could hear him yelling at his wife every night (not a big detail to the story but just wanted to say to add to my point that this guy just sucked) I start to plan my revenge.
I’ve been able to work from home and my desk conveniently looks out onto the street between the houses. This means that I can clearly see SN’s garage. I start to take notice of when he parks his car out in front of his garage. For about two weeks I noticed that he would come home around 1 PM and leave again at 2 PM.
On the third week I decided I would begin the revenge.
On Monday, true to his schedule, he stopped by around 1. After about 10 minutes I gave the tow company a call and said that he was parked in the fire lane and if they could come and remove his car. 20 minutes later a tow truck rolled up, hooked his car up, and towed it off.
About 15 minutes later SN came out and I could hear him start to yell back into his house, presumably at his wife. He then left and didn’t come back until later that evening after he’d gotten his car. Now it was funny to do this and I made sure to send snaps to my roommates who don’t work from home, but I wasn’t done yet.
See this moron apparently didn’t learn the first time because literally the next day he parks in front of his garage again. What do I do? Well the exact same thing as the day before of course. Again, SN comes out, realizes his car is gone, yells at his wife, and then goes to get it.
Now after this time he is a bit smarter and parks in an actual spot before going in to get his lunch or whatever it is he does there mid-day.
He does this for about two weeks before he decides that it’s okay to park in front of his garage again. Well, who is still sitting at their desk every day and notices this immediately? Well me of course. And being the concerned resident that I am, I immediately call the tow company and off his car goes again. And again this is met with yelling.
I wish that this had a more satisfying ending but after this third time, I decided I would stop because I genuinely felt bad for his wife who he seemed to do most of the yelling at as if it was her fault that he was an idiot. What I can tell you is that it definitely cost him over $1k.
If he hadn’t gotten my roommate’s car towed then we wouldn’t have ever found that fun little rule.
The best part was that a number of my neighbors would have their cars parked there at the same time and they’d never have their cars towed which made it all the better when his was. We have had a number of other encounters with him in the time since this happened and I have another story that involves the actual HOA that I’ll probably write later.
That one is still ongoing though so we’ll see how it ends up.”
4. Want To Be A Pain? We Can Too And We'll Prove It!
“I worked an engineering/construction job last year for a home builder and we had to deal with a bunch of conspiracy theorists moving in to one of our neighborhoods.
Constant complaints about the construction, the noise, the debris, which made no sense because they chose to move into the neighborhood before construction was completed.
One man, in particular, would harass us daily, complaining about the streetlights being too bright (they weren’t) and complaining about a generator we had running about a block away from him to power the site temporarily until we had the infrastructure in.
The complaints ranged from the generator was damaging his hearing (thing was almost completely silent) or that the fumes from the generator were coming into his house and causing him and his kids to have stunted development. They would come up with stuff that made little to no sense. It escalated to the point where he got the city and the mayor involved, and we got sued so we gave in to his requests and moved the generator to an inconvenient location and had to take the time and money to rewire to be able to power the areas needed (this was including important stuff like the streetlights, we had to leave off for a couple of nights until the move was complete, and you guessed it, he would call to complain.
The nerve of this man.)
So, here comes the revenge. We received an order from the city to install a 5g tower on-site to improve cellular connection because the area we were in had pretty bad service. Since my team and I were in charge of creating the plans to install the infrastructure, guess where we all simultaneously agreed to put the tower: right smack dab in front of the angry man’s house.
We thought this was incredibly hilarious and couldn’t stop laughing every time he would call freaking out while the tower was being constructed. Got to the point he tried to file another lawsuit, got laughed at, and within a week we never heard from them again. Moved out faster than the wind.”
3. Kid Won't Leave My Toolbox Alone
“The nastiest and meanest thing I’ve done was back in May 2011, shortly after the 4/27 tornado that demolished Tuscaloosa, Alabama.
I was working as a mechanic at a dealership and had about $25,000 worth of tools, and toolboxes that cost around $10,000. I always had a 2-use rule with my tools when someone needed to borrow one of my tools, and that would give them ample opportunity to contact the tool distributor and get the tools that they need. This one kid kept abusing my policy and kept on going inside my toolbox grabbing my tools.
I was off one weekend, and when I returned to work Monday morning as I was unlocking my toolboxes, I noticed one of the top lid pins was pulled out about a quarter inch. I walked inside the office, and spoke with the service advisor who worked that weekend, and asked her who messed with my toolbox, and the service advisor explained that they were busy, and she didn’t pay close attention.
Moments later, the technician who worked alongside me, told me to get inside the PDI (Pre Delivery Inspection) and go for a ride, and he had information to tell me. As we were test driving the vehicle before placing the vehicle on the lot to be sold, the tech told me it was Will who broke inside my toolbox and had my toolbox open all day that Saturday, and he told Will to leave my box and tools alone.
I told the tech I have a surprise for him.
Later that afternoon, Will had taken his lunch and parked his vehicle outside his stall with the windows rolled down. I waited 5 minutes to give him time to settle down in the break room, and I proceeded to the parts department and cut off a 6-foot length of ground wire. Went to my toolbox, grabbed a pair of wire strippers, ratchet, socket, and a pair of pliers.
Went to Will’s vehicle, pulled the hood release, and pulled off one of the spark plug caps. Then I proceeded to strip one end of the ground wire, and wrapped it around the spark plug, and fed the wire thru the firewall, and hid the wire under the carpet. Then I went to loosen one of the bolts to his seat, and stripped the other end of the ground wire, wrapped the wire around the bolt, and torqued the bolt back to the seat.
Basically, I made a homemade electric chair.
At the end of the day, as he was about to leave for the day, everyone stopped what they were doing, and said goodbye to Will, and as he got inside his vehicle, and turned the key in the ignition, he got the shock of his life on numerous occasions. Everyone was laughing, and then he opened the hood and saw my work.
He told me I was wrong for what I did, and I told him to leave my tools alone, and no one told him to break inside my toolbox without my permission. Needless to say, he left my toolbox alone from that point forward as I told him I have more tricks up my sleeve if he continues to get my tools out of my toolbox.”
2. I Kept The Photo For Exactly A Year
“My girl left me for another guy, her boss (what a cliché I know) that’s a whole other story I won’t get into.
About a month after we broke up, she starts contacting me, wanting to meet for a drink, etc. So we meet and she confesses her new guy can’t really function in bed and even then it’s few and far between. Long story short she wants to be friends with benefits. She is smoking hot, we have great chemistry, and being a heartbroken dope I think I might be able to win her back so I say yes.
We met up a few times, it was great but then I just felt used. I started seeing other women, I had met a few nice people (but no commitments), one day my friend with benefits found pics of a girl I was going out with (ok, I accidentally on purpose left them out) she turned crazy jealous, which was hilarious.
It then got weird, she would come over, hook up, drink too much then cry about getting back together but then the next day forgets all about it.
I decided to really break up with her and then the opportunity for revenge presented itself. She came over literally on her man’s birthday, she went shopping and bought him a shirt, she showed it to me, asked my opinion.
So we had our intimate time together, she fell asleep, and in a sudden burst of inspiration, I took a pic of me wearing his shirt with her in the background.
I had planned to send it (via email, I knew his email address) after she left but then I thought what’s the point, I don’t want her back. So I didn’t send the pic.
I did stop seeing her but we kept in touch. I did move on to going out with a lovely girl. Coming up a year later she informs me that she hooked up with her man’s best friend of 20 years and left her man.
Exactly a year later I emailed the guy the pic on his birthday, I said ‘recognize the shirt? You may have thought you stole her but you never had her, happy birthday jerk.’
His response was only ‘well-played sir, well played.’
Oh and she broke up with the next guy and went through 2-3 other guys before she finally settled on someone for a few years, they broke up for a year or two and got back together for the past 5 years.
I kept in touch via social media, it was fun to watch the drama.”
1. Can't Tell If She's His Partner Or Grandma
“A woman in her 50s, alongside her is a young good looking guy. They sat on the table facing my table. I was too busy correcting my resume at that time. I did not mind them that much tho the woman was a little bit clingy with the young dude.
I was in Manila last 2015, and fast food is just everywhere. I have to budget my money so I could send it here for my daughter (she left it in my sister’s care). That day was my first interview as a call center agent, so I was preparing for my resume too. The woman (with a young partner) received a call and she went outside talking on the phone.
This young man approached me and just sat in front of me asking if I’m alone. So to be just human, I just replied with a nod. He asked me again ‘Can I have your phone number?’ Then I answered back with NO, without a glance at him as I was busy checking errors. I turned my back when somebody shouted, ‘Do not flirt with my partner!’ I saw the woman in rage going towards my table and people are looking at her as if they are waiting for the next scene.
Then her man pulled her arm and took her to their table. She was in a high-volume voice nagging her partner. She was looking at me so sharp like a serial killer. Everyone inside the fast-food resto knew she was referring to me.
I pack my things and put my papers inside the envelope. I stood up and took the glass of my unfinished ice tea heading towards the lover’s table.
I stop in front of her smiling (I hid the glass at my back) and with a sweet voice tell her, ‘Grandma, take care of your grandson or you might lose him,’ and I poured the ice tea on her hair, put the glass on the table, then I walked out to turn my back at them and blew a flying kiss on her guy.
I don’t know why she didn’t lure or slap me when I did that. Maybe she was mentally blocked at that moment…
Do not mess with a woman just applying for a job.”
