People Share The Fastest Way They’ve Seen Someone Improve Their Life

A. Lynn

Published on May 6th, 2019

He knew it, or rather, he knew people didn’t like him. A couple of years ago he got married, and now he’s a less pedantic, considerate, still argumentative dude with an inflated ego, but at least he’s mellowed out.” ivydesert

20. There Was A Reason He Couldn’t Keep His Eyes Open

“A guy I know constantly looked so tired and napped all the time during the day. He would nap so hard that you would have to shake him to wake him up, and he could fall asleep anywhere super fast. I asked him about it and he told me he felt tired all the time because he couldn’t sleep at night, he figured he just had insomnia or something but refused to go to a doctor about it.

One day, he had a legit mental breakdown after a few drinks, we basically had to babysit him all night and I’m convinced it was because of his constantly exhausted state.
Not long after that incident, he went to the doctor about his sleep and it turns out he had been living with severe sleep apnea for years. The doctor told him he was basically on the verge of a heart attack or stroke because of it. Now, he sleeps with a special mask at night and he has completely changed for the better. He visibly has way more energy and his performance in school went through the roof.” Frostedchunks

19. You Absorb The Energy Around You

“Changing your social circle to people who make you feel uneasy because they are so far ahead in terms of mindset and comfort zone.

Who you surround yourself with plays a huge part in who you are subconsciously.” TheWikiLeaker

Another User Agrees:
“It’s really easy to surround yourself with people who are absolute sh*tshows, and then excuse all of your own failings with, ‘Well, at least I’m doing better than so-and-so.’ One of the best choices I ever made for myself was making friends with some people who I thought were ‘too good for me.’ Turns out, having friends who encourage each other to be better people really pays off.” [deleted]
18. Real-Life Is More Fun Than Gaming

“He stopped playing League of Legends.

No, seriously. A friend of mine used to spend basically all of his free time in LoL.

If he wasn’t sleeping, eating, or in class, he was in a game. And the weird part was that he didn’t actually seem to enjoy playing either! It was like it was compulsive or something. No matter if he won or lost, he’d be crabby about it. Even in the rare instance where he wasn’t playing a game and got invited to a social event, his sleep schedule was so messed up he usually wouldn’t make it anyway.
He finally decided to try giving it up for Lent, and just never went back once he realized how much of a negative effect it’d been having on him.

He started eating better (because he wasn’t just going for whatever microwave crap he could eat while playing), exercising (because now he had time and energy to do so), taking care of his appearance better (because why would he have shaved, showered regularly, and done laundry when he was just sitting in his room all day?), sleeping a normal amount, and actually connecting with people beyond just seeing them in class. The transformation was honestly impressive. He went from one of the most stereotypical depressed neckbeard freshmen I’ve ever met to a happy, healthy college kid in the span of a couple of months.” [deleted]

Another User Can Relate:
“What got me off World Of Warcraft was having a kid.

The look my wife gave me the first (and only) time she asked me to help with the baby and I said, ‘but I’m in a raid’ was bone chilling. I logged out then and there, canceled my subscription and haven’t played in 9 years.”
whiskymakesmecrazy

17. Juggle Too Many Balls And One Will Drop

“I knew a guy in my Master’s program who was overworked to the point of exhaustion. He had to keep a job as well to pay for all his bills and student loans, on top of taking five high-level classes per quarter. We had an e-mail chat group with me, him, and like 5 others.

One day, we all get an e-mail from him saying he was sorry he wasn’t going to be able to help us finish our project and that he was dropping out of school and we wouldn’t see him again. All of us really liked the guy and we told him as much. We also told him things he probably didn’t hear too much, like ‘you are a vital part of our group’ and that we relied on him for not only his work but his general input as well. A few hours later, he e-mailed us back saying he thought it over and was not going to drop out, and he was sorry for clogging our e-mail feed with his stuff.

A year or so later, his GF (who later became a mutual friend) told us that not only was he simply thinking about dropping out of school at the time of the e-mail he actually walked to a bridge to end his life that day.

He’s a high-level Manager at Amazon now with a wife and two kids. It’s fun to check up on him from time to time and see how happy he now is. I don’t know if us just showing him gratitude that day helped him step away from the edge, but I’m sure it helped at least a bit.

It makes you realize that people just don’t tell other people how grateful they are for them enough. Always let people know the nice things you are thinking about them.”
Yoinkie2013

Another User Gets It:
“That little bit of gratitude absolutely changed his mind and/or played a huge part in his decision to stick with it.

I once was in a similar situation, overworked and exhausted. One day, I had it and was absolutely about to walk into my job and quit. On my way in, a stranger opened the door for me and shot me an easy going smile with a light compliment.

I did not quit that day. It’s been 5 years.” TheUnbent
16. Drink Less, Live More

“I’ve never done *****, but I stopped drinking 194 days ago, and my life has gotten significantly better since then. Moved to away from a tiny town to NYC. Have a sweet new girlfriend. Got a new job. Have almost $1,000 in savings after not having a padded savings account for 7 years. Also, just about to start writing my final paper for my graduate school career. Life is just good!” BroBroBroYourBoat

Another User Adds In:
“Don’t sell yourself short – alcohol is a drug. A very harmful one at that.

I don’t remember where I read it but someone on Reddit was saying something along the lines of ‘alcohol addiction is just as bad as a heavy drug addiction because of the positive social outlook on alcohol. No football game is free from 100s of beer commercials. Any adult party serves large amounts of alcohol, and the main way many people try to meet someone is at a bar with drinks.

Just because society doesn’t see alcohol in that light, doesn’t mean it’s not an incredible feat of willpower to quit. Stay strong buddy.”ouought25

15. Keep Your Nose Clean And Money Will Follow

“Woke up on May 15 flat ******* broke, unemployed, living in a weekly apartment I was about to lose.

Today, I have a full-time job (with insurance) and am typing this on a computer in my break room. And when I get paid Friday, I’ll have money left over from my check 2 weeks ago. Amazing how quickly your life gets better once you stop putting your entire check up your nose.” replies_with_corgi

14. His Heavy Decision Eventually Pays Off

“I managed an apartment community where one insanely obese man splintered the bottom of his shower from simply standing on it. We replaced it at no charge, but the embarrassment got to him. Within a week he found a dietician and started walking around the community.

Within a few months, he bought a bike and started riding around the neighborhood. Within a year he dropped what seemed to be at least 100 lbs. Within 2 years he weighed less than I do now. Casey, you’re a freaking inspiration! Keep at it!” RVBY1977

13. You Always Have A Choice

“Leave your comfort zone and familiarity. It’s how I broke up with an emotionally abusive a*s, how I landed a part-time job that turned into a career, and how I met a guy that makes me happy as ****. I’m an introvert, but it took me about 6 months to go from sad to happy to wake up every day.

And it was just because I finally made choices that I didn’t calculate all the outcomes first, but I made them anyway.” PukefrothTheUnholy

Another User Comments:
“Focus on your thoughts, thought process, and emotions. It takes a long time and some serious self-reflection, but if you can find where some thoughts and emotions stem from it’ll be easier for you to understand why you act the way you do and why you make certain decisions. Some of them can be healthy, some of them can stem back to hurt, past trauma, poor parenting, etc. I like the book, ‘Switch on Your Brain.’ by Dr.

Caroline Leaf. A short book, easy to understand, but explains a lot and helps guide you through better decision making/self-improvement.” TankBud

12. Picking Up When Someone Calls Is What Matters

“My brother picked up the phone and called me instead of ending his life.” whistled*ck

Another User Comments:

“THANK YOU FOR ANSWERING!

Depression is as serious as a heart attack.

My brain will scrutinize every action, remember every folly, and find evidence of my deserved isolation in anything in any cruel, weaponized way. I will be convinced that people who care only care out of pity or obligation, that reaching out is a burden other people shouldn’t be saddled with, that everyone has problems, and making mine known is both selfish and petulant.

Reaching out is a victory that merits exalted praise, but is too often met with rejection or indifference. Hearing active compassion in someone after being convinced that such a tone doesn’t exist is a comforting affirmation that builds people up and saves lives.

If someone is in crisis remember this:

Listen. Nobody asks for a cyst to justify itself. It just drains.

Assert nothing. Their perceptions are real in their consequences.

Active compassion. Don’t just care. Care obviously.
A few words on reaching out: Admitting mental anguish is ******* hard. Asking for help for mental pain is terrifying. Do it anyway. Be scared, feel your pulse rise, and trust that someone will care.

Text a friend. A pastor. A relative or spouse or professor or nurse or coworker or anyone. Tell the checkout dude scanning your can of green beans. Tell family and strangers and do what you need to do to gasp in all the suffocating air until you feel better. Shame can go eff itself. You are in pain, and you need help, and you deserve to be heard.

When you find yourself at the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on.” [deleted]

11. Making Your Bed Sets Up Your Life

“Not someone else, but a personal habit I picked up. I’m not sure how much this helps other people, but I just started making my bed every morning.

I was pleasantly surprised at how much more productive in the mornings I became. Now making my bed is almost like hitting the ‘I’m not tired any more’ switch in my brain. I know it’s all mental conditioning, but I think it really works. Takes like 30 seconds once you get the hang of it.” roketmanp

10. It’s The Small Things That Get You Through

“I thought about ending it all due to a difficult to diagnose pain condition. After surgery failed, I would lay in bed and think about it. Then I remembered that bacon still tastes good. I am not kidding.

I thought, as long as bacon tasting good is reason enough to stay – I will stay.

I found a physical therapist and touch+talk therapist that totally cured me.

Shortly after, I was pretty delicate – and being an ACOA (Adult Child Of Addicts/Alcoholics) my delicate emotions and estrangement from what ‘normal’ is caused trouble with the love of my life.

I went back to the talk+touch therapist and worked through a ton of insecurity, shame, anxiety, jealousy, etc issues and it deeply and completely changed my relationship with myself and with others.

Happily getting married years later to the love of my life, and am pain-free.”Bodymindisoneword

9. Getting Diagnosed Is Half The Problem

“Last year in school I was making really, really **** grades.

Wouldn’t have passed if not for the mercy of my teachers. I posted on about my aversion to working and the intense sense of dread I get just knowing I have to do something for school. Someone suggested I might have ADHD.

I got prescribed Vyvanse almost immediately after going to the doctors and I am now in my junior year of high school doing great. Last year’s GPA was 2.6. This year it’s a 4.2.” pbwarren2001

8. Getting Out Of Debt Saved His Life

“About 10 years ago, a guy walked into my Credit Union, sat down at my desk and said, ‘I need help.’

He sure did.

Dude had thousands and thousands of dollars in high interest, unsecured debt. This debt was costing him over a thousand dollars a month in payments. He and I got to work. We consolidated, we refinanced, and we had a fun little credit card execution ceremony.

All said and done, we saved him about $500 a month in payments. We put together a plan to use half the savings to continue putting toward the debt for a snowball effect and to save the other half in an account I would lock up for him.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago, I saw him at a community event.

He told me he is completely debt-free (including his house), and has savings for his children to go to college. We hugged and chatted. It felt really good.” Wizard_of_Ozymandias

7. Love Can Build A Bridge

“He fell in love with a girl from a wealthy family without knowing she was wealthy. He was financially struggling and was hanging out with rougher and rougher people. He met this girl in a dive-bar and a few weeks later stopped hanging out with those rough characters. She helped him get his finances in order and encouraged him to apply for a job at a company her father owned (he wasn’t aware).

He did well and was put on the fast track for promotion then met her father. After a year they were moved in and 6 months later, married. Now he lives in a nice house, drives a decent car, has a good job that he enjoys and has a happy life. His father in law loves him and he remembers where he came from and helps out his friends who are in rough spots themselves.” AdviceWithSalt

6. Motherhood Looks Good On Her And Her Kids

“My husband’s sister. Former addict, had a reputation for dating real ********, ran away a lot as a ************, was always a mega *****, always getting into trouble, never kept a job for long.

When she got pregnant by the latest a*shole boyfriend, everyone was like, ‘Well, ****.’ She had recently abandoned a dog at her parents’ place when it got too difficult to take care of, so we all figured she’d do that with the kiddo eventually.

We couldn’t have been more wrong because she shaped the **** up. She became one of the best moms I know, left the a*shole (who turns out wasn’t even the real dad), found and married a wonderful man who adopted her son and is the only dad he’s ever known, got a really good job, a nice house, and now has two smart, beautiful, sassy babies who love her more than anything.

It couldn’t have turned out better for her. A+ turn around.” laidoffeditor

5. She Didn’t Let Her Past Dictate Her Future

“One of my childhood friends had her mom pass away very suddenly when we were 15. Her parents were divorced and her dad had already gone on and made a life with a new woman and didn’t give a **** about the kids so my friend was left to live with her stepfather who had been molesting her for years. She ran away and got into alcohol and ***** really badly and then got with a boyfriend who abused her constantly. Her life was a complete train wreck for several years.

I’m not sure exactly how they ended up hooking up but she wound up with this guy that we grew up with that she had always crushed on but was too afraid to talk to. He’s a great guy from a really good family and really helped her clean her life up and get her **** together. They’re married now with a beautiful kid. She became a grief counselor and helps kids and teens cope with the loss of their parents.” [deleted]

4. Gaming Got Ger Out

“In middle school, she rejected her community and embraced the Internet, living in her room glued to a computer which probably saved her from becoming another drug addict working minimum wage in her crappy town with no resources or future.

Gaming became her drug instead, and that led her into realizing her town had no future and she needed to get out.

Ironically, becoming an Internet-addicted shut in un-f*cked up her life since she made friends on the internet with education and life experiences who coached her through the college app process and how to get out of bumf*ck nowhere. So she learned about SATs, got into college, applied for scholarships and now lives in a city with a better job and a better life. Still addicted to games though.”[deleted]

3. Failed Times But Got Back On Top 3 Times

“The same guy unf*cked himself in spectacular fashion 3 times in a row.

He started off as a total wannabe gangster in high school. Selling and smoking *****, fighting with weapons, and stealing cars. He dressed so thuggishly that it would just attract trouble wherever we went – case in point – he got sucker-punched out of the blue at a ******* aquarium.

His hoodrat mom (very attractive, though) suddenly marries a really smart, nice guy who didn’t have any money but had gone to Yale. He took my friend to Yale when they were on a vacation just to show him around. My friend is completely struck by the beauty and grandeur of the place that he decides he’s going to go to an Ivy League school.

He aces high school from the second semester of his junior year on and gets an SAT score that got him into a good state university. Gets accepted to Harvard after his first year.
He graduates, goes to ivy league Ph.D. program for public health, finishes in 3.5 years, then proceeds to destroy himself with pain pills as soon as he’s granted an awesome job in the biotech industry.

Then he goes to rehab, gets clean, gets a sales job at that same company, and breaks every sales record they had by a country mile. Within 2 years, he founds his own consulting firm that organizes sales teams and blows it when he discovers heavy *****.

Loses his company.

He then goes back to sell biotech stuff for another company while still on heavy *****. Sells spectacularly well and switches to suboxone. No idea how this story ends. He did just get married and his wife is a really, really hot woman from Japan.”drfeelokay

2. Gambling Out Of Sight, Gambling Out Of Mind

“A friend from college landed a very fine job as an administrator with a successful business firm. He got married shortly after graduating and his wife became pregnant with their first child.

Things were going great until his casino gambling addiction consumed him – and his paychecks. It was terrible.

They were about to lose their home and his employment was suffering, as a result.
His wife (also a friend of mine) called and asked if I’d go with him and try to be ‘a good influence’ to get him to stop if things weren’t going well with his luck (which they rarely did). It was like trying to reason with the dining room table.

When their son was born, I said to him: ‘You need to be reborn in your thinking, too. Will you support your family or the casino?’

To his credit, that question got through to him. He chose his son and his wife and hasn’t been back since – we believe he never will again.

He’s like a new person, freed from the bonds of addiction.” Back2Bach

1. Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained

“Probably not the quickest, but pretty quick, and with an intense snowball effect.

My uncle’s son from his first marriage (technically my step-cousin?) started an IT company after he dropped out of a VERY expensive, private college in 2012. He was something close to 6 figures in debt and said **** it, started a business. Sold that company to a much larger company in 2015 for $38,000,000. After taxes and accounting fees and all the payouts to minority shareholders, he was left with around $22,000,000.

He took the money and created a very similar, but more technologically advanced company in a part of the world where the service was under performed.

Sold that 2nd company just a couple of weeks ago for $14,000,000. Started a 3rd, basically identical company in another part of the world and it didn’t take off exactly as well, so he stopped.

Now, he bought a cozy house in West Los Angeles for a couple million, has a 4 car garage with nothing less than $100,000 allowed inside, and works on his novels/movie scripts all day. He has money invested in so many different places that he has a steady stream of about $60,000 coming in every month to **** around with.

He made his money, is very, very smart with it and lives it up because he understands you can’t take it with you, so might as well live lavish.” clever_username7
Shocked? Surprised? Inspired? You don’t need an excuse to do amazing things! Notice how the common theme here is that everyone changed their mindset and then became aligned! Have a similar story? Tell us everything!