People Tell How They Got Their Just Deserts Revenge
39. I Crushed My Bully In A Debate
“Well, I’m not the type who craves revenge, but I’ll admit when I was younger, the idea appealed to me.
To sit there, watching your enemy burn in flames, having them regret every single moment they hurt you. I could write this high gung-ho response about how my best revenge was rising above my bullies/enemies, and ending up in a far better and more peaceful state of mind than them because that would be the technically correct answer. But, I’m assuming that a more interesting experience would be a situation where I actually got some revenge, which would be in the 7th grade…
There was a boy in middle school who was horrendously rude when he found out I had a crush on him. He made me feel ugly, unwanted, and pathetic. Within my spineless and shy head, I would continuously craft fantasies where I made a fool of him. But I never imagined it could one day happen. Until a beautiful spring day in 7th grade English class…
We were having a debate on whether or not the dropout age should be raised to 18 throughout America, and be required for everyone to stay in high school until they get their diploma. Before anyone comes after me in the comments, I know more about the topic now and obviously have learned the different sides to it, but at the time, I was set on it not being required. Mainly because the reason that children in poorer families might need to drop out to get a job, and can get their GED when they’re in a better situation (a reason given in an article the teacher gave us).
The teacher told us that if we agreed, we need to go to one side of the room, and if we disagreed then we go to the other side, then we’ll take turns bringing up reasons for our topic. I was on the disagree side, and he was on the other side with most of the kids. (for some background, he was the type of smug kid who loved to act like he knew everything.
He loved to repeatedly tell everyone how knowledgeable he was about politics, history, the government, things like that). Eventually, he brought up his reasons for it, and I rolled my eyes and took the microphone right after. Then, once it was in my hands, I was unstoppable.
The words just poured out of me. I crushed his reasoning, reinstated the logic for mine, and burnt his ridiculous argument to a crisp, to the point where even the teacher was laughing.
His face started getting red and he looked embarrassed, but at the time I couldn’t care less, because the ignorance in his attitude and his inflated ego had made me want to do something like this for months. He didn’t speak throughout the rest of the debate. After I was done, some kid behind me whispered ‘she just demolished him.’ I felt like a queen.
Of course, I normally don’t like making people feel bad and embarrassed and am not the same person since then. But still, I’d be lying if I said that ruining the person that made me feel terrible for months, didn’t make me feel better. It was a good day.”
38. Anyone Want Floor Brownies?
“I used to work for a manager (M) who had very poor hygiene and not great motor skills. One day we were going to have a company picnic and another lady and I would be serving the food to everyone.
M brought two-bite brownies as her contribution. You know, the type in the plastic container with the little indentations for each one. But she sort of threw them at me across the table and the lid popped open and half of them fell on the floor. The other lady and I started to pick them up and throw them in the garbage. M flipped out, actually screaming ‘THOSE ARE STILL GOOD DONT THROW THEM AWAY!’ Ok ok fine, we won’t.
But we did keep them separate from the good ones.
But due to her excessive volume, when people came through the line to get food everyone asked me what M was yelling about. ‘These brownies fell on the floor. These brownies did not. Which one would you like?’ Funny how no one wanted the floor brownies.
Petty revenge: At the end of the picnic we put them back in the box and gave it back to M.
She’s the one who said they’re still good and we can’t throw them out, right? Enjoy your floor brownies!”
Another User Comments:
“When my grandson was 3 he came to visit. He dropped a cookie on the floor, picked it up, and was about to take a bite from it. I told him it was dirty and to throw it in the trash and I’d get him another.
He told me it didn’t look dirty, so I explained that people walk on the floor and their shoes have been outside where they have stepped in dirt and maybe even on dog poop and it tracks inside, so we don’t eat food that’s been on the floor.
The next day a good friend came by and I had set out a tray of cheese and crackers.
My friend dropped a cracker on the floor and as she bent to pick it up, grandson yelled, ‘Don’t eat that! There‘s poop all over Grandma’s floor!'” RumBunBun
37. Think My Car Is A Piece Of Trash? Well Mine's Not The One On The Side Of The Road
“I once had a department head who was such a tyrant that everyone avoided interaction with him at all costs.
Lucky me, I had to deal with him daily as he was my direct supervisor. He was nasty from start to finish every day. I am pretty tolerant of poor to childish behavior in management, after all, the saying IS ‘promote to the highest level of incompetence’. To this end, he was a GOD among incompetence with people skills bordering on those of Attila the Hun, his mentor no doubt.
Anyway, as I said, I can be very tolerant of this behavior as I have found that most of those who exhibit the same are usually compensating for shortcomings in life… My take anyway. So, I once purchased a used Dodge Ram Charger that needed much work, got it for a song as it is said. I went through the mechanical issues and was moving through the bodywork nightly and on weekends.
This was my daily driver. As I arrived at work before most, I got my choice of parking so I parked two spaces away from the loading dock (NEVER take the space adjacent to the dock, EVER! lol.)
This dock, one of two, was within 30 feet of the front door. The tyrant now started having issues with my truck sporting a patchwork of light blue paint and primer.
He came in after spotting the same and, over the public address system demanded ‘whoever is driving that piece of trash Ram Charger next to the dock, come to the kitchen!’ All who knew I owned it were consoling me for the pending doom they anticipated I was in for as I passed. Some followed at a respectable distance. I arrived to find him pacing circles in the kitchen.
He went up one side and down the other about ‘that ugly piece of garbage that was parked so all customers could see it’ adding ‘do you want our customers to think we don’t pay our employees?’ After the laughter died down and he threw most everyone out he continued… ‘move that piece of garbage around back where it will never be seen.’
Now, he was both my department head AND in charge of H.R. Again, LUCKY ME! I stated that I wasn’t going to move it for a multitude of reasons. The first of which was there was no assigned parking for anyone (although most employees avoided parking anywhere near him). The second was that there was nothing wrong with a vehicle in primer as, if nothing else, it showed I cared for my truck and was repairing it.
Third and most importantly (to me anyway) was that he had no right to demand this as there isn’t anything at all in the employee handbook about parking. He stormed off. Now, before you say it, I know that I just kicked a sleeping RABID dog. This man made me HATE going into work on my THIRD DAY. I used to stay up late due to knowing when I awoke I had to go to work and deal with this low life.
The best days we had there were when he was on vacation, out sick, or traveling for the company (honestly, better productivity was documented when he was out).
So, one Spring day, as I was driving home, in the middle of about two weeks of rain, puddling everywhere, I was on the highway. My truck had VERY wide tires so it displaced copious amounts of rainwater from said puddles.
On the side of the road ahead I spotted a truck with doors open and the hood up. They were obviously having issues. As I approached, I was ‘locked’, unable to change lanes. I didn’t know until I passed that it was the tyrant! It would seem that his BRAND NEW truck was having issues (but my ‘piece of garbage’ was running JUST FINE thank you!).
Well, as I said, I was ‘locked’ into my lane, unable to move away. As I passed, he was ‘baptized’ with a wave of rainwater. (I SWEAR this was NOT planned although, had I known it was him, I might not be able to say this now). I looked in my rearview mirror to see him wiping water out of his eyes. At this point, I’m thinking I just handed him my resignation.
When I returned home I sped up my quest for a new job, in process for a few weeks at that point as his poison was RUINING my health and I realized I needed to get out of there so I started looking through my contacts. As this was Friday, I was hopeful that a weekend away would take the sting out of the incident.
Monday morning I was a wreck. I put on my best game face and walked into work. I did everything as I always had, starting with sitting in the kitchen, reading the paper. He walked in and as usual, didn’t greet anyone. After getting coffee he sat down as he did and started a conversation with another manager. So, in his story, he lamented about how ‘some woman in a station wagon drowned me and my truck’!!!!!?????
Could I believe my ears? Did he really say it was the car BEHIND ME that got him!?!? I was ‘safe’ at this point. He told everyone what happened and that ‘a woman in a station wagon’ drowned him and his truck! A few days later I found that he had to have it towed (due to the breakdown, not the drowning) and that the dealership couldn’t get it going because the instrument cluster was saturated with rainwater.
No, I didn’t and don’t feel he deserved that. He was a jerk but that was more than he deserved. Fast forward a week. The repairs were NOT covered under warranty (go figure). His insurance company however DID cover it under ‘accident’ status. His 500 +/_- mile truck was TOTALLED. He bought the same model, one year newer, only to have the same issues with it dying as did his totaled truck.
THIS he deserved.”
36. Try To Keep Me Away From The Hot Tub? Too Bad I Know The Rules
“So my parents live at this college in faculty housing and there’s a hot tub with a beautiful view.
Especially pretty at night… Looking out over the ocean, watching planes fly into LAX… It’s really pretty.
Anyway, because it’s nice, a lot of students from campus try to sneak up there and take a dip.
I don’t blame them. However, especially to homeowners around there, it can get loud in a hurry when they’re trying to sleep.
Anyway, I was up there one night minding my biz’ and ‘Harry’ walks in. There were about 50–60 houses up there so you knew who most people were. I recognized him, he didn’t recognize me. I was 18 at the time, just back from a year at college.
Anyway, he starts asking me questions thinking I’m a student and not ‘faculty’. I get it, told him I lived there, said my name was Brian. Well, he didn’t believe me and wanted my last name, address, etc. Fine, we’d gotten off on the wrong foot, I went over, shook his hand, introduced myself, and thought that was the end.
Well about 3 weeks later, my dad asks me, ‘Hey, did you have a run-in with Harry at the hot tub?’ I was like ..’what?????’ Apparently, Harry had told our neighbor ‘Sal’ that I was some disrespectful kid or something.
I was incredulous, beside myself. I was a good kid, mostly shy, and my dad could tell by my reaction that I was telling the truth. I think this guy was mad that he didn’t ‘get’ me, and felt embarrassed or something. My dad said, ‘well, he doesn’t have kids, he just doesn’t know how to relate’ or something like that. Fine, but I was 18.
Anyway, whatever… my dad didn’t care and wasn’t mad so I could tell he knew that guy was off…. but I was stewing.
I went to the library or wherever I needed to. Actually think I found the Homeowner’s rules on the internet or something.. (1998- no small feat). Anyway, of course !!! I was reading the rules, and it hit me. This guy had brought his dog with him to the hot tub.
That is most certainly not allowed, and while I couldn’t have cared less and would never have said a word… I wrote a beautiful piece of prose to the Homeowner’s Board… (anonymously of course… what am I, brave?) talking about how I love being a part of the community, but I’ve seen some people breaking the rules lately, and I don’t know how to tell them to stop when the VP of the board at the time flaunts the rules by bringing his dog into the hot tub area while clearly bylaw 2.xx23 states that pets are not allowed. It really was a thing of beauty.
I spent hours writing, re-writing, etc. (lol at my younger self.. I probably could have just said ‘hey… tell Harry to keep his dog out of the hot tub area.)
About a month later I was at the hot tub again and Harry walked in… by himself this time. I imagine he knew it was me who’d written the letter, but neither of us said anything and I just went on looking at the ocean and the stars.
It felt so good.
Funny thing is, now I feel so proud and so guilty at the same time. I was a shy kid and I really like that I stood up for myself, but I really kind of dislike that I take so much pleasure in ‘getting’ someone and it makes me feel like a bad person. The guy’s dog wasn’t doing any harm, and that was his companion.
He deserved it, yeah, but it’s not really my job in life to go around making sure people get what they deserve. It’s kind of a great thing to look back on and as much as I love it, I think it makes me less likely to want to take revenge in the future. If I feel ‘bad’ about such a small thing, it’s a good reminder to stop and think long and hard before doing something, and not do it lightly.”
35. Accuse Me Of Stealing Your Phone? Maybe Once I Find It I Will
“I used to work retail: This brat of a preteen comes in and absolutely destroys my fitting rooms and in the process lost her cell. It being back to school time, I hadn’t gotten to the room by the time she realized she lost it and came back. I let her back into her room to look for her phone (no one else had used it).
She, of course, being a total jerk, barely looks before telling her irate mother that I stole it. Mom starts flipping out to my boss who ultimately sides with me, but causes me a lot of undue stress. A bit later after they’ve left and called corporate about the ‘thief.’ I find her kid’s phone. A brand new smartphone. Took the SIM card out and trashed it.
Felt awesome.”
34. It's About Time You Pay Her What She Deserves
“In the late 80’s I was working in manufacturing and had become a respectable prototype mechanic.
Fun times! This was early enough, and the shop small enough for me to experience a lot of old-school ways of doing things. Paper tape, actual hand drawings, math, writing g-code manually, layout, all sorts of great skills I’ve used off and on in my life since.
But, I was pinned as far as advancement went. Plenty of senior people with lots of time remaining in their careers left me in a good place, but it didn’t pay what I needed, and it was going to be the same place for a long while…
Enter a good friend who took an opportunity to clean up a rough shop. He wanted help, and I would be hired right into the next position I wanted. Deal!
This place was like a backward time machine! The people were the worst. Well, most of them were. Company practices were a mess! Many of the people in the shop were arrogant, not particularly skilled, and many were bigots, haters out and proud.
That was hard to bear, but I got some important lessons about what it takes to stand up for other people, along with slashed tires, some pretty egregious abuse, and the occasional leave early before ‘they’ get out to the parking lot! This was flat-out crazy!
To top the rough experience off, most of the equipment was old, abused, and poorly serviced. But none of that is central to the story, just some setup.
I noticed fairly early on that all of the women worked in one place. Found out they all made within a dime of one another, and it was all basically minimum wage, despite some of these women having considerable skill and experience. I became good friends with one of them like we’ve all had happened at the workplace. We both were married and would joke sometimes about ‘work spouse’ due to the richness of the friendship.
Let’s call her Tara, for the purpose of this story.
Being young, we had a lot of fun despite the oppressive environment. Part of my job was to improve this company. Clean up the equipment, establish better practices, modernize where possible and practical. I was in my 20s and most of the changes impacted people in their 50s. Yeah, those arrogant haters were very set in their ways.
Let me just say there were sparks.
Along the way, the company had purchased some computer equipment and an MRP system. They didn’t do a network, opting for a serial terminal VT 100 type setup instead. I helped set all that up and got my first sysadmin experience on that system. It was a lot of fun, despite being old school dated from the moment it was delivered. I managed to do various automations, including using PCs for some of the terminals so I could run scripting software that would streamline input and capture information for reports without having to drudge through the software interfaces to do it, but I digress.
Here’s the key thing: I made a book. In that book was this company. All the systems, equipment, docs on the automations… everything! And I’m good at that kind of thing. Trust me, if you were just dropped into place and were tech-literate on any level that book was all you needed.
One day I walked in to find my desk having been moved, and it was facing Tara!
She grinned and said, ‘well look at this! Looks like we are working together now.’ Truth is, we both thought it was strange but cool as we did have a lot of fun. I asked why, and they said Tara needed to learn some job cost aspects of the system for accounting, and I was fine with that. She had little manufacturing experience but was tech literate, so off we went.
I took her through the shop, and again that time capsule. If she wore anything but a bag, the leers were obvious and intense! We both felt pretty bad about that, but the rest of the training was just fine. I taught her everything because I had a plan.
See, all the women making the same money, forced into one room, one role basically, didn’t sit well.
We both were married, and we both were looking to start families, and we both needed more to make life happen as we needed it to do. I was denied a wage increase, and she was stuck at the pittance women were paid in that company. Neither of us was going to be happy there, and the longer it went on, the higher the overall life impact too, and we both knew it.
I had finished the hard improvement work with my good friend. Quality was up, new work came in the building, and we both learned a lot, both grew considerably for the experience. But in most other ways the environment was actually bad for me personally. Toxic.
I also wanted to move out of manufacturing due to the massive outsourcing going on, and she wanted to get out of accounting and into more tech/management-type work.
So it was settled, and soon the day came where I was going to leave. We had a little party, both realizing the playful, close times were coming to an end, but life was out there and we both were going to go live it large too!
We discussed the plan: ‘Tara, take this book home and just camp on it.’ Many knew about ‘the book’ but nobody knew about the expanded edition Tara had.
I knew they would be calling me within a week, and I was going to refer them to Tara and say I was busy otherwise. She was going to say she can do the work and would expect to get paid what that work was worth.
If we were successful, she would nearly double her income and we both would advance our careers and stick it right to misogynistic haters, bigots, and theocrats who really deserved it.
Took two weeks. And I got a phone call: ‘They paid me!’ YES!! Oh, that felt super good on basically all fronts. Do some good for someone else? Check. Stick it to jerks? Double-check.
We kept in touch for a year or two after that, and the place slowly spiraled out of control again. She left soon afterward taking her new experience and skill into a great opportunity same as I did.
There was a bit more brain drain and it reached a point where one of the owners’ sons showed up angry and literally cut EVERY wire in the building. Strangest thing I have ever heard of.
All the wires. Not just cut but cut good, many with long sections missing.
It all sold at auction a few months after that. The building still stands today, old, decrepit, but somehow still hosting some business or other.
It should be condemned.
I put the setup into this answer to hopefully convey just how painful it was for those people to actually pay a woman what she’s worth. And to convey just how delicious it was to have been part of making all that happen! The calls I got! One was literally screaming, ‘you know we can’t pay HER!!’ (yeah you can, snicker)
The best part, over and above the gratification I got out of seeing our plan work so well, is I realized I am the sort who will stand for others who deserve it. Those couple of years had a big impact on me and I took many painful lessons into what has been a great career so far.”
33. Bully Me? I'll Tank Your Grade
“There were a group of girls/guys who hated me in middle school because I was the typical weird girl/geek type who liked anime.
They would shove me into lockers (I was horribly claustrophobic at the time), insult me, the way I talked, steal my books, and just generally make my life awful. One girl eventually became their ringleader because she pretended to be my friend only to spill all my secrets to them for future bullying use. I decided to take her down.
At our school, if you did not have your required homework or materials you would get 3 written warnings.
After the third one you would get detention, 5 you would serve 2, etc. You also got a zero for the grade if you did not have your homework. I found one of the ringleader’s locker combinations. I would proceed to steal one of her books, or hide her homework elsewhere, only for it to turn up the next day where she thought it would be. I did this for a little over a month.
By this time her grades tanked to failing (she wasn’t doing that great, to begin with), she had served many detentions, and the teachers generally lost all trust and respect for her. Especially when she would blame me in class (but I was sitting here reading the whole time, teacher! How could I have done anything?). I confronted her on the way to lunch one day, telling her to get her friends to back off or else she would have more problems. Girl never spoke a word to me again after that, and the others did back off.
Bullying solved, no thanks to the school system that permitted it.”
32. Cut To The Front Of The Bathroom Line? I'll Get You Stuck In The Porta-Potty
“Back in summer of ’02 I was at this festival in Paris, Solidays or something, anyway – you know how lots of people and fairgrounds go, there was one of those porta-potty areas with the rows of blue box toilets, a huge line, and about a thirty-minute wait.
So I waited in line. It was forever. I had to go really bad, but it’s cool, everybody’s being polite and we’re moving along, there’s just that many people.
Then I’m three people from the front of the line – it’s about to be my turn! Relief sounds too sweet for words at this point.
Then some random guy walks past the dozens upon dozens of patient people in the line, walks up to a door that opens as someone steps out, and he enters – didn’t even wait at all. People notice, they sigh, call him names, but nobody does anything.
I’m angry. This is not going to simply get ignored. Justice must be served. I walk forward onto this ribbed aluminum stage that the porta-potties are sitting on.
There’s a concrete block sitting there.
I pick it up and wedge it in front of the door of the line-cutter’s blue box door and the ribbing of the stage. It’s in there good and tight. I went back to stand in line.
The people in line are laughing. The door bangs. No one moves. The door begins to bang faster and harder. No one goes anywhere near it.
I’m at the front of the line. It’s my turn. I do my thing. The door is still banging. The toilet is foul in that ‘used for hours by hundreds of people’ way. I’m happy to get out.
The door is still banging.
I walk off into the sunset, past dozens of people who are giggling about the angry porta-potty that rattles in the distance.”
31. Get Me Fired? No One Is Going To Like Working With You
“I worked for a very small company (about 20 employees) right out of college. When the owners of the company went out of town, about 2 or 3 times a year, the managers would frequently throw all-day parties for the workers, we’d grill, drink, play games, etc. There was one older lady at the company that, I guess, for whatever reason, did not like me. I could be a bit outspoken about social issues being in my early 20’s, so that may have been it, but I really to this day don’t know why she disliked me so much.
Anyway, she waited until about a week after one of these parties, went straight to the owners of the company, and told them that the week before, she was watching me and noticed I didn’t do any work all day (duh, none of us had, including her). She was banking on the fact that the owner would only pull my logs for that day and no one else’s and she was right.
My managers fought for me (truthfully, they were probably a bit worried I’d rat them and the whole office out) but it was to no avail. I got fired.
The revenge bit of the story is that since it was such a small company, everyone quickly got wind of what this woman did, and she was given the stone-cold silent treatment by everyone, including the managers.
She even went to the owner and complained that she was being treated unfairly, but there wasn’t really a lot he could do about people not wanting to socialize with her. She ended up quitting about 3 weeks after I got fired. Apparently, she had trouble finding a job and came back a few months later begging for her job back, but my managers were in charge of all hiring and basically laughed in her face.
She went above them again to the owner, but at that point, he was sick of her drama and told her he wasn’t interested in having her back.”
30. A New Gummy Flavor For The Guy That Steals My Snacks
“When I was a freshman in high school I was on the wrestling team. There was this jerk on the team that would always steal food right out of my hand, chew it obnoxiously, and laugh in my face.
One night he was sitting in the row in front of me on the bus on the way back from the tournament, I could tell he was trying to get the timing right to steal a gummy orange candy from me. I put the gummy in my shorts. Straight-up tea bagged the life out of that candy. (He obviously couldn’t see any of this) Then I lift it up, say loudly, ‘Darn, this is my last one!’ Then I start to bring the gummy to my mouth.
This is all too much for this jerk. Sure as ever, he snatches it out of my hand and gobbles it up. The guys beside me saw the whole thing and lost their minds. Best feeling ever.”
29. Cut My Salary Or You'll Fire Me? I'll Take My Vacation And Then Quit
“Got my degree and wasn’t able to get a promotion at my current company. Let my boss know I was looking for a new job and handled the move professionally.
Left on good terms.
Started my new job, at a significant bump in pay, and quickly discovered it was nothing like the DBA job I had interviewed for. Instead of managing databases, I was expected to learn a proprietary coding language created by my new boss. There was no documentation and he treated everyone like an idiot if they asked questions while trying to learn.
After 3 months I had a review. I was told I was doing great and given a raise.
I continued learning and persevering through my boss’s abuse. 3 months later I was pulled into another meeting with my boss and his boss. I was told I wasn’t meeting expectations, although they wouldn’t explain how, and told to sign a document putting me into a lesser position at a significant cut in pay.
If I didn’t sign I was told I would be fired. I signed and immediately started looking for another job.
I called up my old boss and asked for a reference. She told me she would do so happily, but I should know she had just submitted a job requisition for a new position that I would be perfect for. We discussed it and I agreed it would be a fit.
I went through the interview process and got the job at a higher salary than my new company had started me at. The only problem was that they couldn’t bring me on until January 1st (it was Oct). I said that was fine.
For the next three months, I made sure to use all my vacation and did next to nothing while at work.
I scheduled a vacation for the last week of the year.
On the last business day of the year, I came into the office handed in my laptop and a letter of resignation that was effective immediately. They were actually surprised that I was quitting.”
28. Make Up Excuses To Ditch Me? I'll Pee In Your Shoes
“My partner had just got a brand new pair of Air Jordans that he was sporting around the neighborhood. He kept disappearing in the evenings making excuses as to why I couldn’t accompany him.
One evening, he had left his Air Jordans out on the back porch by the garage and it was beginning to rain. This is another evening of excuses to dodge me and go out so I knew something was up. Since he didn’t wear his Air Jordans that night and it was beginning to rain and he left them outside I thought what the heck so I took his new shoes into the garage and I peed in them, filling them up to the brim, let them soak for a little while before emptying their content and then putting them back out on the porch where they were rained on.
Later on, I brought them in the house and used a blow dryer to dry them well, and returned them to the porch. The next time he went to wear them with the intent of skipping out on me for another ‘ME ONLY’ evening he was in for a very humiliating experience… cutting his evening plans way short and suddenly returning home. APPARENTLY, he was meeting up with a friend at some other friends home where several people were just hanging out and chillin’ until comments were being made regarding a STENCH/FOUL ODOR that the source of where it was coming from wasn’t easily resolved until someone zeroed in on my partner’s feet/shoes… in which he promptly exited his secret hookup gathering and bee-lined it for home completely mortified and embarrassed… man, did I love the unexpected way my revenge played out on the player!
I HAVE NEVER REGRETTED MY ACTIONS THAT NIGHT and sometimes revenge really is sweet!… (when justified).”
27. Keep Tripping My Friend? You'll Find Out Just How Much It Hurts
“So, something you should know about me for this story is that I am insanely protective of people I care about. Like hunt you down and hurt you sort of protective. Well, in 7th grade, a guy in my gym class put this to the test.
I had become good friends with a girl in my class that year, and as she was one of my only friends, I cared for her deeply.
She really felt like all I had. At the beginning of class every day, we simply walked in circles around the large gym in groups, with no teacher supervision I might add. And a guy I’d known for a few years (and hated me for just as long) got the bright idea to pick on me. It was only ever little stuff, tripping me in the hall and calling me names.
I really didn’t care, and it didn’t affect me.
That all changed when he moved on to my friend. We would be walking a lap around the gym, and he and his buddies would walk up behind us and trip her. Over and over. They called her names and were just general jerks to her. This continued for about a week and a half before I reached my boiling point.
So on the way out of class one day after they had been particularly harsh, I noticed the teacher had stayed behind to clean up. The jerk was standing right in front of me, so I reached out my foot and tripped him, but it wasn’t over. I then stepped next to him and ‘bumped’ into him as he was falling, so he face-planted into the metal door.
Only a small group of people noticed the actual fall, but they soon alerted everyone else, and soon the whole hall was laughing at him.
I’d like to say that I regret it, or got in trouble, but nope. And he never messed with my friend again.”
26. Start A Water Balloon Fight? It's On
“During high school, my partner and I would often walk her two overweight dogs around the neighborhood after school. One afternoon, I hear the sound of a car driving up fast behind us and I turn around just in time to catch a water balloon in the gut.
My partner and one of the dogs got hit too. I was RAGING mad at this point, and I recited the license plate over and over as they sped away. I thought that one day I would come across that car again, and I would get my revenge.
So now that we were miserable and soaking wet, we decide to take a shortcut through a large park back towards her house.
Along one part of the path, the city skate park is visible through a clearing in the trees… and guess what I spied? OH YEAAAAAAA!!!! It’s go time.
We RAN back to her house and raided the place until we found a bag of water balloons. Eye for an eye right? Nope. Filled those suckers up with milk and recruited her brother as our getaway driver.
As we pulled up to the skate park with our bucket of milk balloons at the ready, the hooligan’s car was pulling away! Trying not to alert them to our presence, we followed slowly behind and waited for our time to strike. Moments later, we were arriving at a two-lane intersection when the light turned red and the car rolled to a stop. It’s GO time!
We pulled up beside them and unleashed madness. Milk balloons directly inside of their car, all over the dash, all over them. It was amazing watching the look of fear as they tried to crank up their windows. Revenge = totally worth it.”
25. Try To Make Me Jealous? I'll Leave You Star Struck
“My ex of 8 years (who went behind my back for 4 of those years without me knowing ’til the end) showed up at a conference I attended. This was after a couple of years of not seeing her or speaking to her.
The first of those years I felt like I wanted to die after finding out what a jerk she was. The second of those years, well… a whole lot changed for the better.
When my ex and I first saw each other at the conference, we locked eyes but she acted like she didn’t notice me and she walked away through the crowd. About an hour later, she found me and politely invited me to see a particular show at the conference.
I went to the show, not realizing that her new partner was the main attraction. My ex did her best to throw his ‘success’ in my face. I acted cool and didn’t mention that I too was in a new relationship. My ex and I parted ways after the show, agreeing to have lunch at the conference a couple of days later.
Two days later, my new partner arrived at the conference (by that time, we had been together for 4 months and we’re still together now a year later.
Note: My partner is a well-known celebrity, is extremely gorgeous, and is a bigger geek than I am. My ex had NO idea and could have never fathomed I’d get so lucky.)
So I walked into the restaurant first to greet my ex and her new partner. I stood facing them with my back to the front door of the restaurant, refraining from taking a seat, while they sat at their table chatting with me.
Then, perfect timing, my partner enters the restaurant (people start taking pictures of her/with her, she signs autographs, etc.). My ex and her partner notice her, but I keep them distracted.
A couple of minutes later, to the near-soiling-themselves-surprise of my ex and her partner, my partner runs up behind me, wraps her arms around me, then spins me around to face her and unabashedly kisses me in front of my ex, her partner, and everyone in the restaurant.
Then my partner proceeds to politely introduce herself to my ex and her new partner (as if they didn’t already know her, while both of their jaws were dropped and my ex looked like she was going to vomit).
At the end of the conversation, my partner states that she needs to sweetly steal me away from dinner with them for a surprise she has for me back at the hotel.
She then looks at my ex and says, ‘Nice meeting you, er… wait… what was your name again?’
I don’t regret it, I never will, and that jerk-of-an-ex can rot in her self-made trash.”
24. Fire Me? You'll End Up Using My Book To Teach The Class
“I was teaching science including senior chemistry at a private school.
At that time, mid to late 90s, a lot of linked private schools were doing anything and everything to ensure a meek and compliant workforce. The remaining few brothers and nuns as well as former brothers were serious about hanging onto their power. As a result, any staff member who held any kind of branch position within the Union was got rid of by one means or another.
I saw it happen to a number of colleagues around the same time.
In my case, I was subjected to daily bullying episodes by the Principal. I eventually collapsed with a mental breakdown and was dismissed.
When I recovered, I found work at a public school and I am still there. I co-authored a chemistry textbook.
What happened to the private school? Instead of having me, a well-respected teacher and author, they have had well over two decades of a number of chemistry teachers.
Varying quality. Varying levels of experience. At times, it was a struggle to find anyone.
When the book I co-authored was released, the then teacher wanted it for her class. She ordered it. The school secretary canceled the order and ordered a different book. The teacher could not understand why. I never told her. She eventually managed to get my book.
So not only has the school had some difficulty in replacing me, they ended up using my book to teach from.”
23. Try To Block Me In? You Should've Had Your Parking Brake On
“After college, I moved to Los Angeles in the early 2000s and a friend there helpfully gave me tips on places to park for free so I wouldn’t have to pay for lot parking. I was still job-hunting, so between applying for jobs and interviews, I would do some sightseeing.
I was in Hollywood and decided to park on this side street my friend had shown me where I could park during the day. There weren’t a lot of spots due to the number of apartment buildings and driveways, but the spaces between driveways were enough room for one or two cars to park. And there were no parking permit requirements during the day so I could park as long as I wanted.
I got lucky and there was one spot open behind a big pickup and the entrance to a hotel parking lot. The truck took up most of the space and then there was a big painted no-parking red zone before the hotel driveway so that people leaving the hotel would be able to see who was coming down the street before they pulled out. My car was just compact enough to park between the truck’s bumper and the red zone if I parked just an inch or two from the truck.
(There was a driveway in front of the truck so he wasn’t blocked in and could pull out easily.)
I parked my car and then wandered around for an hour or so before I had to go meet my friend for lunch. When I got back, I was really annoyed to see that someone had parked a VW Bug (not an original bug, but one of the yellow updated versions that came out in the ’90s) right on my bumper.
They decided to park in the red zone, just inches from my bumper, and the truck was still here as well so I had no way to get out.
I was so mad and worried I wouldn’t meet my friend in time. (I didn’t have a cell phone yet so I wasn’t able to call and tell her what had happened.) For some reason, I decided to get in my car, turn it on, hit the gas, and see what would happen.
Since the car was an inch away, I didn’t expect much of anything but thought it would make me feel better while I waited for the jerk to come back. So I hit the gas and suddenly my car is moving, albeit slowly. I realized that I was actually pushing the Bug backward because their parking brake wasn’t on. I checked to make sure no one was in the hotel driveway and then kept moving until there was enough space for me to pull out and the Bug was only partially blocking the driveway.
But then I noticed a tow truck turning down the end of the road. Knowing from my friend that they were likely looking for parking violators to tow, but not sure if they would give the Bug a pass since it was only blocking the driveway a little, I kept reversing until the Bug was fully blocking the hotel driveway. Then I pulled out and drove away.
When I got to the end of the street, I saw the tow truck make a u-turn to pull up next to the Bug. I wasn’t able to stay and watch the rest, but I can imagine what the driver thought when they came back to find their car missing.”
22. Steal My Parking Spot? I'll Paint Your Windshield Red
“I am waiting for a spot in the parking lot for the fishing pier.
Guy clearly sees that I’m waiting for a spot (it’s a one-way circle), and goes around me and cuts me off to grab a spot as someone was leaving.
He pulls his nice new Cadillac into the spot, and I pull behind him in my truck and get out. I say ‘I know you saw me waiting for that spot,’ to which he replies ‘no I didn’t, this is my spot.’ So, being the 19-year-old testosterone-filled dude I am, tell him to screw off and eventually get a spot like 20 minutes later.
A few hours of fishing later, and I decide I’m gonna leave. As I get to the lot, guess whose white caddy is still parked up in ‘his spot’? At this point, I am grinning because this dude messed up. I proceed to grab a 10-15lb Bonita (basically a tuna that tastes like trash) from my cooler, walk up to his car, cut the throat of the fish and bleed the entire thing all over his windshield.
I mean it looked like the dude hit a dog going 100mph. Screw that old piece of trash.”
21. Blast Your Music At Night? I'll Fill Your Trash Bin With Raw Fish On The Hottest Day
“This happened a few years back. I lived in a converted Victorian house in Nottingham. I had a nice one-bed flat. The only issue was the studio next door. The girl living there kept to herself for the most part but would listen to house music all night on the loudest volume she could get to.
I worked full time and was kept awake all night, every night. After being the adult and asking her to turn it down after 10 pm and her shouting at me, I took my revenge. On the hottest day of the year, mid-summer, I was waiting until the rubbish bins (which were stored directly under her only window) were collected.
I then proceeded to throw away a lot of raw fish.
With the heat, the enclosed bin smelled so bad. Unfortunately for her. The next bin collection wasn’t for another 2 weeks.
The satisfaction of her face when she realized there was nothing she could do was worth having to walk past the smell every day to get into the building.”
Another User Comments:
“Reminds me of when I was in the Army, on TDY at Ft. Sill.
Was staying in a hotel room, and there was a chaplain in the room next to me.
He reported me to my commander for having a woman in my room all night.
Bought a big chunk of turkey bologna. Nastiest stuff on the planet. Left it in the back of my truck for two days, until it was good and ripe, then late one night I put it under the intake on his air conditioner unit.
This hotel had window units.
In Oklahoma. The dust bowl. In late July. Haha…that stuff was just nasty, and it permeated his room. They moved him first thing the next morning.” ididnotdoitever
20. A Bunch Of Employees Walked Out On Awful Bar Owner
“Back in about ‘84, I got hired at a very popular Country & Western bar as a ‘Bar Back’ which is basically an Assistant to the Bartender.
I applied for the job because I had just turned 21 the year before, it was near my apartment and I thought it would be an interesting way to meet pretty cowgirls (It was!) I really LOVED that job except for 1 thing: The owner was a complete racist jerk that would only get worse the more he DRANK. And he was a mean one! Whenever he would come in, if I was working, he would move me to the very back of the smaller of the 2 bars in the building and have me serve him while he proceeded to VERBALLY demean me for hours.
I’d never really experienced BLATANT bigotry before so although it was SHOCKING to hear, I put up with it because 1) I needed the job 2) the tips were GREAT! 3) I was working with some VERY COOL PEOPLE and 4) I was meeting lots of pretty cowgirls! Nonetheless, I eventually got tired of his nonsense and decided to quit.
(Before I proceed with the rest of the story, I should point out that this particular bar was VERY POPULAR & VERY FAMOUS so they would often bring in up & coming stars OR those on their way down but that were still well known.
Without fail, whenever we had a HEADLINER playing, the place would be PACKED and STANDING ROOM ONLY! No one got the night off if a Big Name Singer was playing. Anyway, for concerts like that, the ‘Owner’ would put a big table near the front of the stage that would be roped off for just him & his friends. And guess who he would have make the drinks at his table while he let loose on his verbal insults?)
Back to the story. As I said, I had decided to quit. When I told some of my co-workers, they tried to talk me out of it but I’d pretty much made up my mind as I’d had enough. At some point, I decided to throw a ‘farewell’ party at my apartment when the subject of my decision to quit came up. That was when I came up with the PERFECT way to get some measure of REVENGE on this BIGOT so I shared it with my coworkers.
They not only liked my idea but surprisingly, many of them offered to join in on my plan as well and not just be observers (By the way, I was not the only person who did not like the owner. Did I mention that he was also a misogynist so he was hated by many of the waitresses there too for his lewd comments & always grabbing/touching them?
Actually, most employees were in agreement that he was a jerk including most of his managers).
So here’s what we did: On the night of the next BIG CONCERT, about a week after my farewell party, everyone showed up to work as usual. The bar was packed wall to wall. Of course, he’d set up his PERSONAL table in front of the stage while he & his buddies sat around getting wasted. There were about 25 regular employees working that night.
Besides myself, around 10 others had also decided to participate in the fun (ALL the regular employees had been told about what was going to happen). So, about an hour before the concert was to start, I gave the signal and I and the other employees that had had enough of his nonsense, walked up to his table where he & his friends were getting PLASTERED and in UNISON said to him ‘Hey jerk, this is for you’ as we flipped him off and walked out the door and headed to my apartment to have a good ‘Time to get a New Job’ party!’.
After the bar closed, a bunch of the employees that did NOT quit came to the party to share with the rest of us all the details of what happened after we walked out. Needless to say, he was LIVID (and I assume, pretty EMBARRASSED) because instead of getting to WATCH the concert, he had to (while wasted) help the remaining employees handle the SURGE of customers that night, from serving to cleaning tables.
And YES, I felt bad for the employees that could not afford to quit and had to stay and work that night. But I heard later that it had been worth it to them to see the owner get his comeuppance and actually have TO WORK FOR ONCE instead of just making everyone’s job miserable! I never did bother to pick up my last check, but oh well.
I was PLEASANTLY SURPRISED as well as IMPRESSED that even though most everyone was in on the plan, no one spilled the beans at any point! In retrospect, other than the owner being a jerk, I still fondly think of that job as one of the FUNNEST I’ve ever had. And my/our EXIT still makes me chuckle 35 years later!”
19. Keep Pranking Me? I'll Drench You In Cold Water While You're On The Toilet
“I was a freshman in college and rooming among other freshmen in a fraternity. The fraternity was so wild that it was expelled from the campus that year. I nearly flunked out trying to pledge to that frat. But I digress.
One of the guys I was not roommates with was quite the prankster. It started out with unscrewing the caps on the salt in the cafeteria, then drawing on someone’s face while they passed out wasted. As I enjoyed the occasional drink, I would get wasted and pass out on my bed. Several times he would smash a pie in my face while I was passed out, put my drawers upside down, smear petroleum jelly (and other substances) on surfaces like a doorknob.
Some guys tried one-upmanship with him but he kept raising the stakes. I was getting annoyed. I kept asking him to stop. But, he didn’t. He was famous for taking people’s towels while they were in the shower. I could go on. One day I literally woke up as he was about to draw on my face. That was the last straw. I came from an Irish family of five boys and I was the middle one.
I was impervious to being messed with, but it was getting inconvenient. And I was NOT about to walk around campus with something drawn on my face.
One night after dinner he was in a stall taking a dump. He was in a stall that was adjacent to a shower stall. I walked in and realized it was him and I had an epiphany. I ran down the hall dumped the garbage out of my trash can (mostly paper) ran back into the bathroom and filled up my trashcan with water.
It was really, really cold water. Very. Cold. Water.
Can you see this coming? Well, a bunch of people did, and they started to gather in the bathroom. I had to tell them to be quiet, cuz no one out pranked the prankster. But I had not yet pulled any pranks. I just rolled with them.
He was still sitting on the ‘throne’ when I peeked over the edge, lifted the bucket over the top, aimed, and poured (not dumped) the ice-cold water on him as he sat there in his shirt and sweater – pants and undies pulled down around his ankles.
He screamed and stood up immediately (think about that for a minute) before…cleaning up, and yelled who is that!
When he walked out of the stall no one was around. I moved out of that dorm about a month later and he had not found out. He had also stopped pranking people. I didn’t really care if he found out it was me, I was ready for him at that point.”
18. Won't Fix Your Car Alarm? I'll Have To Force Your Car Off The Road
“Years ago, I lived in an apartment that was pretty close to the street. In the summer, I’d leave my window open. I’d hear everything that’d go on outside.. which wasn’t a problem. Until this one car.
This car that was parked on the street had the most sensitive car alarm. A garbage truck would drive by it, and the car alarm would go off.
I think the owner didn’t live close by, as it’d go off until the alarm would time out. Like 10-15 mins. It’d go off very often for no reason, and it was really annoying. I called the police but they didn’t do anything about it in a big city.
So I left a note or two on the owner’s car to fix their alarm.
Yet over weeks it persisted. It kept going off, I was really frustrated.
So I deflated their tires. I put peas in valve caps and then put those valve caps on their tires and deflated them. All the tires were deflated.
In my frustration, I thought it was a pretty non-destructive way to get their attention (as opposed to something like slashing their tires).
It turns out it worked a little too well.
A police car driving by saw that the tires were deflated and considered the car inoperable. They put a sticker on it saying they had 7 days to move/fix their car.
The person didn’t move their car in 7 days (I don’t think they drove it often), and they towed it.
Lol, but funny enough when the car showed up parked on the street again it didn’t have the same alarm issues.”
Another User Comments:
“A few years back, an apartment dweller across the street had a car like that. I think he was kind of a night owl. His alarm would go off and it would take him ten minutes or more to get it turned off. Another neighbor was an early riser with a loud pickup truck. Every morning, as he left for work, he would rev the LOUD engine as he passed the sensitive car.
The car’s owner would stumble out in his pajamas to shut off the alarm. The owner and car moved after about two weeks. And then I slept.” communityActor
Another User Comments:
“Lived on 3rd and C in NYC when car alarms had just become popular in the early 90’s – one night, there was one car alarm which was going off CONSTANTLY but this was not so unexpected for that neighborhood at that time – in the morning the car had been completely, spitefully, stripped – they took everything.
Tires, hubcaps, doors, seats… I think the locals had finally had enough.” Jake_Stockton
17. Blame Your Loud Music On Me? I'll Show You How Loud I Can Be
“Everyone has had that annoying neighbor in an apartment block that just doesn’t understand that other people live there too. Mine just happened to live above me.
He had one of those god-awful boomboxes whose existence was solely to provide maximum bass.
He would play his awful music at all hours mostly in the evenings and afternoons when his mother was out. I’d bang on the ceiling and from time to time he would actually turn it down, but mostly he’d ignore it. I’ve even knocked on the door trying to talk reasonably with them. The son would ignore the door, and the mother would scream that it’s not her son doing it.
The mother was a piece of work too. I’d be banging on the ceiling, and then 5 minutes later I’d get a pounding on the door. It was the mother, wasted as can be, telling me to turn down my music. I stared at her in disbelief. I casually pointed out that the music she could hear from my hallway was in fact, coming from upstairs.
She screamed some more so I shut the door in her face. I slid a note under the door stating that I would show them what loud really was if they didn’t stop this nonsense.
Despite repeated complaints to the landlord, nothing was ever done. One night, my wife was trying to sleep, and he simply would not turn anything down, my wife finally said ‘Do it,’ referring to a plan I had formulated involving my subwoofer.
I’m a home theater enthusiast, and generally speaking, have some fairly decent stuff. I placed my sub, bottom facing upwards against the ceiling. I then propped it up with books and wood to hold it in place without slipping around. I then fired up the old Xbox and found the bassiest, loudest game I had in my arsenal, and played it for a good hour, cranked up as high as the sub would let me, and with the receiver outputting as much bass as possible.
I played for about an hour. The building shook. Really shook. Each explosion, thud, and artillery salvo resonated. I slowly turned down the volume. No noise from upstairs.
I slid another note under the door:
‘I’ve played your little game, and as you can see, can pulverize you anytime you start having a little bass battle. I won. Keep your music down, or you’ll never have sleep again.’
Any time after that the music was at a very low level. Slightly audible but nothing that would keep you awake. We moved out a couple of months later to a much more respectable apartment building.”
16. Take My Comic Books? Candy And Chaos For All!
“In the fourth grade, on a military base in Texas, I used to ride my mother’s bicycle off the base to the local comic book store, and spend my entire allowance on comics. I would then spend the rest of the week selling these comics to the rest of my fourth-grade class, for double the cover price… I got to read all the comics and made a healthy profit on them as well.
One day my teacher Mr. Smith found out about my scheme and confiscated my entire collection of comics. They weren’t disrupting class, as I sold them before and after school, and I had them in a paper sack in my desk like I did every week. I was as angry as a ten-year-old could get.
So I gathered all the money I had (ten bucks!) and went to the local commissary.
I bought all the bulk penny candy I could. It ended up filling a grocery sack about half full. That’s a LOT of candy. Then the next day, I smuggled it into the school. I showed it to all the kids before the day started, and announced anyone who got yelled at, got a handful, and anybody who got sent to the principal’s office got FOUR handfuls.
Chaos ensued, as I sat back and watched, angelically glaring at Mr. Smith. On the second kid sent to the principal’s office, I got ratted out.
The principal sent for me and Mr. Smith together, and someone else took over the class. Once in the office, the Principal asked me what was going on… I explained in detail, still angry, speaking in clipped terms what Mr. Smith had done, and how I would keep making his life miserable till I got my comic books back, and I glared at both of them with little hands folded in defiance.
When they sent me out of the room, I could hear both of them break out in uncontrollable laughter. I got my comics back.”
15. Demand You Get A Free Meal Without Reading The Fine Print? Deal With The Cops
“Many moons ago I worked for a restaurant that had coupons. They were hugely popular with customers but the servers hated them because coupons brought in the cheapskates.
One promotion was a buy one get one free dinner, a rack of ribs.
The kicker was you had to buy an appetizer and dessert to get the freebie. People never read the small print, so I would tell my customers when they used the coupon what was required.
This one table, I’ll call them Karen and Ken, didn’t listen to a word I said. They ignored and interrupted me. They ordered two rib plates, a children’s cheeseburger, and chicken fingers for the little one.
Karen made sure I understood she wanted the appetizer plate, not the children’s one. I knew what she was doing – she wanted his meal to count as the appetizer so they could use the coupon. The thing was, the coupon specifically stated the appetizer could not be used as a meal.
When I tried to explain they needed another appetizer to qualify for the coupon, Karen became frustrated. She bragged that she was some uppity jerk at some big company and that made her special. Plus, she’s a CUSTOMER!!!
She said she could do what she wanted and dismissed me with a literal wave of her hand.
Fine. I put the order in and they got their food. When done, they ordered pie and I dropped the check. The coupon was not on the bill, as they hadn’t qualified for it. Karen called me over.
Karen: You forgot to take one of the rib plates off.
It’s not that hard, are you new here?
Me: As I told you before, your son’s dinner does not count as an appetizer.
Karen goes off and the manager happens by. He asks what’s going on and Karen rants about how I’m trying to double bill them. He hears them out and then looks over the bill.
Manager: It seems your order did not qualify for the coupon.
Karen: WHAT! It said appetizer and we bought one!
Manager: Yes and it was your son’s meal, not an appetizer. It even came out with the rest of your food.
Karen: So? Do you know who I am? I’m the customer, you do what I want. PERIOD.
Manager: I’m afraid I can’t do that. We have to follow the rules…
Karen gets up and starts picking stuff up off the table.
She tells her husband and kids to get up and it’s time to go. The manager asks how she wants to pay. She says she won’t be paying. They argue while the husband and kids sneak outside. When Karen tried to slip past the door, several hostesses blocked her way. The manager followed her, holding their bill. She eventually made her way outside, where I could hear her screaming at everyone.
In the end, the manager called the police. He stood behind their SUV and refused to move, even when she turned on the engine and revved it. When the police arrived, the woman became even more angry, screaming that we were harassing her family. Once it became clear the cop was on our side, the husband sheepishly opened his wallet and took out a wad of money.
Karen saw this and began to scream at him but he ignored her. As soon as the manager had the cash (no tip) he thanked them for coming by and went back inside. We heard Karen berating him in the parking lot for another 20 minutes before they finally drove away.”
14. Rudely Park In My Driveway? I'll Make You Late For Work
“This happened about 25 years ago (in the UK) when I had bought my first house. We had a driveway that was side by side next door.
Each drive was long enough to park two cars tandem so whichever car was parked first could not get out unless the one behind was moved first. Next door was also a young couple with the man being a typical ‘boy racer’ of that time and often had his friends around to watch football and have a drink.
I’m a big football fan too so never minded the noise.
However, I returned home from work one day to find one of his friend’s cars parked in my drive. I knocked politely on their door to ask them to move. They were watching football in the room right beside the door with all the windows open and were quite loud and rude. Telling me to screw off.
I thought I recognized the car in my drive and when I looked through the window confirmed it was owned by someone I used to work with, so I called him out by name which caught him unawares, asked him again to move it but he wanted to be macho in front of his friends and told me again to screw off.
Cue petty revenge..I simply left…parked my car bumper to bumper with his making it impossible for him to leave in his car. Put my music on and simply waited until I heard their door open about an hour later. It was bliss to hear a few expletives and then a knock on my door asking me to move as he had to leave for work.
My simple response? ‘Screw off I’m watching football!’ He left on foot and came meekly asking for his car the following morning…”
Another User Comments:
“We had the same deal with our neighbor. She was a nightmare party girl who woke the whole house up many times screeching, coming home at 3 am with her bunch of freak mates. She constantly parked in our spot, which was in front of her main living room window.
So my husband started bringing his work truck home, filled with huge ladders, then constantly parked that in that space completely blocking out any light or view into that room. She asked if he’d swap the car and the truck around….we told her to screw off too lol.” speccy76
13. Deceive My Brother And Then Regret It? I'll Make You Believe He Wants You Back
“One time a girl broke my brother’s heart, she liked to sleep around (still does) and went behind his back.
My brother broke it off but she still wanted to be with him, but that didn’t happen. So she then started seeing the kid she hooked up with while with my brother. We all went to high school together, and at our school, they do these Valentine’s grams. So I bought one for her and wrote ‘Drop that zero and go with a hero’ and I signed it from my brother.
My brother then tells me she walks up to him all excited and hugs him and thanks him for the gram. My brother being a jerk starts laughing and starts telling his friends who are also jerks. They all are laughing at her and calling her rude names. She then walks away humiliated. Turns out that she had dumped the guy she was with to be with my brother again, ha that never happened. I regret nothing!”
12. Make Getting Out Of My Parking Spot Difficult? Here's Some Cat Litter
“A few years back I lived in a packed apartment, you know, one of those that have so many occupants that the parking was always miserable at a certain time of the night. The kind that when you get done after a double shift serving tables, you want to cuss and scream because you have to park on the other side of the complex because every spot was already filled.
Living in the south where everyone has to have a tank-sized truck must have been some sick joke for the people that built the apartment complex.
My solution was to get the parking spot that had a grassy patch so I only had to deal with one jerk opening their door into my car. Sometimes people would illegally park parallel to the same grassy spot but it was always a bad gamble.
The tow truck would always get you.
One day, before going to work, I cleaned out the litter box, grabbed my keys, the bag of cat poop, and started heading to my coveted spot by the grass.
And some jerk was parked behind my car…I was already going to be late for work.
They parked parallel to the grass, overshot the curb, and had the nose of their car directly behind mine.
Angry, cussing, and smelling cat poop the whole time, I backed up and pulled out repeatedly. It FELT like a 37 point turn to get out of the spot and I was getting angrier every time I shifted the gear.
I finally cleared the car without a scratch, saw the clock and how much time I had wasted, and before I took off, I decided I needed to get the anger out.
I took the bag of poop and dumped it on the car and drove off to work instantly feeling better.
About a week later, I found out I was pregnant. Guess they shouldn’t have parked behind the hormonal pregnant woman with a bag of poop.”
11. Mess With The Teacher's Sub? This Quiet Kid Has Got Her Back
“Most people in elementary school made my life awful but there was this one group of boys that made it unbearable. They made fun of my weight, my appearance, my quietness, my awkwardness, anything. The fact that I’m a female made things worse as they thought it was easy to take advantage of me or refuse to take any female seriously. I was kind of a good kid so I never really rebelled.
So one day, in grade 5 I think, we have a substitute teacher and, as usual, these guys decide to mess with her. While I sit in my assigned seat, these guys, along with everyone else, move their desks closer together so they can sit with their friends. These guys are known for being a ruckus so they were deliberately kept apart in the seating plan.
The teacher is unconvinced that they were allowed to sit with their friends and begins asking if this is really where their teacher assigned them to sit. They insist yes, and so does everyone else. The teacher doesn’t believe them, mainly because everyone is squished to one side of the classroom and there are enough desks to disperse us everywhere.
Not only do I feel bad for this teacher, but I have also been a longtime victim of their nonsense and I have no sympathy for them.
One of them also happens to sit across from me who they treat like she has cooties. I begin to feel like the teacher isn’t going to do anything and the rest of the class has their backs, but then a lightbulb goes off in my head.
So, with a proud grin on my face, I make a split-second decision to point to the kid’s rightful desk and say ‘he sits over here.’
The class groaned at me loudly, but he’s told to move immediately and I still have a grin on my face. It didn’t make the bullying stop, but it was a good, small victory to spoil their fun.”
10. Won't Lend Me Some Cash? I'll "Discover" Your Secret Coin Stash
“My first office job 38 years ago was inside sales in the metals industry. There was one other inside sales rep and we got along very well.
I’ll call him Mike. He was a good egg but tight with his earnings, very stingy which is fine, mostly.
We helped each other out sometimes. Shortly after I started working with Mike, his car went into the shop for repairs, so I gave him a lift to and from work for a few days. No biggie – I was happy to help.
Then one Friday, I forgot my wallet at home and didn’t realize it until it was too late to go back and get it.
So at lunchtime that day, when the food truck rolled up, I asked Mike to lend me a couple of bucks until Monday but he declined, even though we were friends and he knew I was good for it. So I borrowed some from someone else in our office because I always bought lunch on Fridays instead of bagging it as on other days of the week.
I never let on that I was disappointed and just a little annoyed, having done him a few good turns.
Instead, I started messing with him in little insidious ways. Once in a while, I’d secretly stash a quarter somewhere in his workspace by taping it under his desk or chair or phone or behind his in-box or somewhere else close by.
Then later in the day, I’d ask him to lend me a quarter for the soda machine.
Of course, he’d say ‘Nope’, so then I’d reach behind his desk or somewhere nearby, pull one out, grin, and go get my soda.
I did this enough so that when Mike came to work in the morning, he’d search all over for stashed coins, but he never found any.
I also got a big kick out of lowering or raising his desk chair a little every couple of days.
He squirmed uncomfortably and eventually came to believe that his chair was defective. So one day he turned it upside down and checked it out like a mechanic at which point a little ball bearing fell out and went ‘tic tic tic’ across his plastic chair mat.
So I got a few of those little bearings somewhere and once in a while, I’d place one on a little flat space on the bottom of his chair so it would fall off as soon as he sat down and go ‘tic tic tic’ across his mat.
Then he’d get the bearing, flip his chair and try to fix it. It was just funny to watch.
Revenge is a dish best served cold.”
9. Made A Disgusting Drink Concoction To Stop Him From Drinking My Water
“On my baseball team there was this jerk that would always drink from my water bottle and eat my seeds without asking, so what I did was I filled a water bottle with water and added powdered butter (for popcorn) and pickle juice and garlic salt and a TON of cayenne pepper, like about a cup of it. It totally looked like that powdered Gatorade stuff, so one day he looked at it and said ‘what’s this?’ To which I responded ‘oh, that?
It’s homemade Gatorade.’ He shrugged and took a drink and spewed it out immediately. I started laughing uncontrollably and he nearly puked and started screaming about how his mouth was on fire and he didn’t have any water. We later got along ok and after it had been sitting in my bag for a couple of weeks, tried it on other people and eventually got almost everyone on my team and the JV team to try it and almost got our coach.
Best prank ever.”
8. My Dad Trashed A School To Teach Litterers A Lesson
“My family used to live across the road from a school. I didn’t go to said school as, despite its large complex, the grades produced had never been that good (barely any A’s, few B’s and mostly C’s and below).
Often in the morning parents would drop their kids off in front of the house, preventing us from getting out of the drive and on occasion almost crashing as we pulled out. The kids were worse, they would constantly litter onto the street which would blow into our and some neighbours driveways.
My dad often complained to this school’s headmaster to educate the pupils on littering or at least put some more bins around the site.
This request was ignored despite complaints from neighbours as well.
He (my dad) decided enough was enough and began to collect up this litter and put it into a separate bin, he also did this for other houses on the street. These eventually got full and the littering continued and my dad pretty much lost it.
He got together a team of the neighbours one night and broke into the school.
Bearing in mind that these are all men between 40 and 65. They proceed to empty around 12 bins worth of rubbish and litter around the school site whilst my dad uses spray paint to write ‘How do YOU like it?’
This was a Sunday so all the kids coming to school for a new week saw it. My dad or the neighbours never got caught by the police because of a lack of evidence and no witnesses.
The school proceeded to put bins pretty much everywhere and the neighbourhood looked considerably better.”
7. Make Me Miss My Sister's Wedding? Well Guess Who's In Charge Now
“Back in 1981, I was a B.A. student at our state university. My sister was going to get married on the exact date when one of my classes was going to take a test. Knowing that, I asked my professor if I could take the test at another time.
Guess what – he refused. Long story short, I had to hightail it right after the reception started, find a way to get to the university – I did not have a car at the time and our public transportation is awful – and take the test. I should have said earlier that the man was a hard taskmaster, and not particularly liked by any of his students – at least, not that I know of.
Two years later, I was at our Boy Scout Reservation, for a once-yearly camp devised to induct both Scouts and adult leaders into the Order of the Arrow. Also known as the National Honor Society of the BSA, this has three levels: the most basic is Ordeal, followed by Brotherhood and Vigil Honor. I was already at the Brotherhood level and was asked to be an assistant leader for the adult patrol.
Surprise – there’s my old professor. Coming in as a candidate. Not even an Ordeal yet. Theoretically, I could haze him any way I wanted. Worse for him, that night the patrol leader had business elsewhere – leaving me in charge. Let that one sink in for a moment.
What kind of revenge did I take? Enter psychological warfare. I let the professor’s imagination come back to haunt him, remember the hard times he had given me and the fact that he denied me permission to be with my sister on her special day?
Later, he became quite amenable and, without prompting, told me all about faculty members I had not heard from in a long time.
So – I did nothing, except let his mind and memory torture him. I guess the man had to have a conscience, somewhere in his skull.”
6. Make Sure Your Son Gets Top Grades In Your Class? Not On My Watch
“When I was in class 8, a new teacher came to teach us math. He was transferred from some other branch.
Also, a new admission took place and he was the son of this math teacher. He used to teach well. His son was also good at his studies. Used to answer in class quickly and all that stuff that toppers do. I was also good at studies, always used to be among the top 3 in the class. So at the end of the 8th class, we had a new topper who was this guy.
In the 9th class also we got the same math teacher. Now this teacher had settled in the new environment, knew all the tips and tricks of the school. So he started to show his true colors. He always used to give priority to his son. He used to check his paper at home and our paper in front of us and used to humiliate us in front of the whole class.
He used to cut marks without any reason so that we can’t get the highest marks. This really decreased my confidence in this subject and I started to feel as if I was gonna score fewer marks in the final exam also. And as expected I got fewer marks and for the first time got thrown out of the top 3.
And yeah, I forgot to tell you about the boy, he used to make fun of all the students, by showing off his knowledge and marks.
He used to ask the marks of all the toppers and then used to pass comments like, ‘How could you even think of getting marks higher than me’ and so on. So we get into the 10th class and the hype was already there that this is it, just pass it with flying colors and your life is set. And fortunately got another math teacher that was pretty great, used to treat everyone equally.
The marks of that student start to decrease (not substantially), but he never got the highest marks in math. But unfortunately, our current math sir left the school and the previous teacher again got our class to teach us math and all those things started again. But one day I thought enough is enough. I started studying math on my own. And I really started enjoying it.
I completed my coursebook within a week and then completed some side books. I was confident I’d get good marks.
Finally, the day of the exam came, I was relaxed as I had prepared really well. On the other hand, when I reached my center, I saw that teacher giving some last-minute instructions to his son and he looked somewhat tense. The exam went well.
Finally, after a few weeks, the results were announced. I was really tense before seeing the result. And after numerous attempts when the webpage opened, I was more than thrilled to get the perfect 10 CGPA and that guy had got something 9.4 CGPA. And the irony was he got the lowest grades in math subject.”
5. Vindictive Roomie Gets A Nasty Taste Of Her Own Medicine
“I lived in England for a while with my teenaged daughter in a rooming house. One of the roommates we got to know was fun, her name was Sam. She asked us if we’d move to a better place with her. We did. After a couple of weeks, we found her behavior to be inappropriate, rude, nasty, vindictive to us and the other tenants of the 2nd rooming house.
You couldn’t speak to her about it as she just says sarcastic things back. She cheated on her partner with one of the housemates, slept with others – this itself is not wrong or right, but she’d tell us how virtuous she was and how fantastic her partner was.
Sam ate our food and had her ‘friend’ whom she disliked create henna on both arms and hands (for hours) so she’d look good at a wedding, not pay the friend or even speak well of her.
Why the friend didn’t know she wasn’t liked, I don’t know.
Her work was past my daughter’s bus stop for college. If my daughter missed her bus she’d ask if she could go with Sam to work as she drove right by. ‘No why would I want to do that, get there yourself, you made the mistake.’ True but helping people out is also compassionate when it’s on your way.
Sam was estranged from her family because they made her do chores at home. Yes, she left because of chores. While knowing her, she’d made up with her family. Sam’s family was excited so when they went to India they brought her back clothing, jewelry, and other items. As she shows us the items, Sam is telling us how they are not good enough, her parents didn’t care enough to bring more for her, etc.
After a while, we couldn’t stand to look at her and we planned to move. My revenge was rather sweet and disgusting too. Sam ate individual cheesecakes and often left a couple in the fridge. Before leaving I took dog poop, a very small amount as you’d smell it, and opened the package carefully and put it on the bottom between the cake and packaging, closed it up, and done.
Soon after, one night she came to sit with us, brag and gossip, etc with a piece of cheesecake. I watched her eat it. Was the best night in her company ever. No, she never got sick as it was a tiny amount.
No one knew but me, and to this day I can still see her eating it. I saw her years later, being herself and just laughed as she didn’t recognize me.”
4. Make Us Pay Your Rent? Say Goodbye To Med School
“I took 5 years to graduate college because I was dual majoring but I really only had friends in my year. For the 5th year, I found a room in a house pretty close to campus, it was a little expensive but I’d rather throw down a little more than have to drive and get a parking permit or take a bus. Think it was like 850 for one of the smaller rooms in the house (welcome to college towns in California).
The guy who was ‘running’ the house was paying 1400 for the master suite (big room, own bathroom, walk-in closet, deck), and the other two bedrooms were going for 1000 and 1100 respectively.
Anyway, the house was pretty nice, the carpet was trashed and there were a few other small issues, it had a good-sized backyard but the barbeque island back there didn’t work. One day when the landlord (an econ professor actually who owned a number of houses and rented them to students) was over doing something, I joked something like for 4300 a month you’d think you could get the barbecue working.
The guy looks at me for a second and said the house was 3300 a month, at least until he fixed it all up.
Jerk housemate, driving a new Mercedes SUV, was paying 400 a month for the master bedroom and making everyone else pay his rent. We were all working or taking out loans while he’d brag his dad was paying for everything and would always fly home every weekend.
Anyway, he was a neurobiology major and wanted to go to med school. Had the grades for it but it wasn’t like a sure thing. Anyway, I made it my job to come home every day for lunch and to check the mail, and all those med school letters that were coming back. They got burned.
Last I heard he ended up at a vet school in the Caribbean somewhere.”
3. Don't Like How My Room Looks? You Won't Like How Your Breakfast Tastes Either
“When I was 15, my father and I had a fight about cleaning my room, and what was ‘acceptable levels of clean’… after hours of arguing, I decided to make brunch, as sort of a peace treaty (or so he thought)… I made eggs, toast, and two sets of bacon… the perfect combination of chewy and crunchy for myself, and then the second batch.
This batch was dry, crumbly, and crunchy. Of course, I served it to him with a smile, and ate mine across the table from him… the best part was the look on his face when he saw me sitting there eating what he thought was horrible bacon with a huge smile on my face.”
2. Think You Can Just Fire Me On The Spot? I Hope You're Satisfied With Your Last Paycheck
“I worked as an assistant manager at one of the main Pizza Chains (I will leave the actual company unnamed). I had been there for roughly two years and seen many Assistant and Store Managers come and go, either being transferred or quitting. Some were good, some were bad.
One Particular Assistant Manager that joined our team (We’ll call him Josh) was a complete jerk right from the start.
A scrawny little punk in his early 20s. He has a smug, condescending attitude, treated everyone as if they were inferior to him.
The one thing that really pushed me over the edge was when he accused me of stealing, sent me home, telling me I was fired. All the while, refusing to listen to my suggestion that he check the security camera. Also, keep in mind that we were both assistant managers.
I’ve been there for over two years. He had been there for only a few weeks.
After I left, I called the Store Manager and explained the situation. He didn’t care whether I stole something or not, he just stated that Josh had no right to do what he did.
As for the revenge I got against this smug little punk…
I had come to open the store and found it a complete disaster.
Everything like the oven and such were still running, food was left out, etc. When I opened the safe I found the money all just strewn in there. The correct procedure would have been to count the money. Keep $500 organized and stacked in the safe and put the rest in a deposit bag to be taken to the bank that night. All he did was cash out the drivers and tossed all the money in the safe, unorganized, and didn’t do any paperwork or deposit.
I call the Store Manager to find out what happened and he informed me that according to the drivers who were working, Josh had a mental breakdown, began throwing and kicking stuff then just sent everyone home several hours before the store was supposed to close. If he hadn’t quit, he would obviously be fired. Either way, he wouldn’t be working for us anymore.
I went back to the safe, opened it, and while obscuring the camera’s view, pocketed about $200. I then called the manager back saying, ‘Hey, I counted the cash, but it’s like $200 or so short. I don’t even know if we still have orders from last night that need to be can-‘
He cut me off saying, ‘Don’t worry about it. He didn’t take care of the money, it’s on him.
If it’s short, it’s coming out of his last check.'”
1. Treat Your Plant Better Than Your Employees? We'll Destroy It
“I had a job after leaving school at 17. It was a decent job for a teenager, but the manager was an utter and complete nightmare. Nobody liked him. His subordinates hated him, his superiors openly ridiculed him and our regular customers disliked him.
He was a liar, a hypocrite, and condescending. An all-around despicable person.
There was one other kid at the store who was the same age as me and we got along great. We played football at lunchtime and went out drinking together at weekends. He despised the manager every bit as much as I did and we shared our negative experiences involving him with each other.
One day, the manager brought in a houseplant and placed it on the window sill by his desk. It was just a cheap plant and we would probably have not noticed it, but he went on and on about it like it was some rare exotic orchid. He would tell us how much it had grown and made a big deal about feeding and watering it.
We began to hate the plant, because it was his and because he obviously cared a lot for it.
One day, we both had had enough of his nonsense for some reason and, since we were otherwise powerless to do anything about it, we decided to take it out on his beloved plant. There was a large container full of sodium chlorate in the workplace that was used for herbicide on the paths, roadways, and car parks around the buildings.
It was a white powder that had to be watered down before use. It had to be stored carefully and dispensed into smaller containers for the building managers with care, so we knew that it was pretty strong stuff.
My workmate and I both decided that the plant was going to get a dose of sodium chlorate and laughed like excitable children at the thought of killing it!
Trouble is, in our childish excitement, we never actually decided who was going to do the dirty deed and we had no idea how much herbicide to use.
The following morning, I saw my opportunity. The manager left the office to go somewhere, so I mixed up a spoonful of sodium chlorate with half a cup of water and poured it into the plant pot.
I could hardly contain my glee, but I had to play it cool to avoid drawing attention to myself. I said nothing all morning and carried on as though I had done nothing untoward.
At 10 am, I went to the break-room early and, as soon as my workmate entered the room, I checked that the coast was clear, smiled like the Cheshire Cat, and then proudly announced that I had poisoned the plant!
I was fully expecting praise and hearty back slaps, but, instead, my workmate covered his mouth with shock and then told me that he too had given the plant a dose of herbicide! We could only stare at each other in shock! What had we done? We were sure that giving the plant such a large dose of herbicide in such a short spell would be too obvious and we would be found out and sacked. Oh well, the deed was done and there was nothing we could do other than nervously keep an eye on the plant.
By lunchtime, the plant was slightly leaning over and the manager was clearly concerned for its well-being. By late afternoon it was on its side and the manager was looking more confused and concerned. By the next morning, it was dead and shriveled! We had probably given it enough herbicide to clear a car park!
We were sure that we would be challenged and found out, so we feigned confusion and sympathy!
The manager eventually decided that he must have overwatered it and we were happy to nod in agreement that this might be the reason for its super-fast demise. In hindsight, I don’t think the manager’s ego would ever allow him to believe that we might despise him enough to poison his beloved plant. He was the sort of person who believed that he would be popular with the young lads no matter how badly he treated them.
It was a truly petty example of childish revenge, but my workmate and I laughed about it for many years afterward whenever we met up!”
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