People Share The Moment Instant Karma Was Served

Oh karma! You can be so giving at times. And other times, just downright cruel and unusual! You come with a wicked sense of humor too! What’s up with your hot and cold ways? Oh, it’s me? Not you? You mean to tell me it’s not you who brings me this luck, and I’m the one who reaps what I sow? Oh.

So now that we’ve got that settled, karma means action. You’ve probably heard that what goes around comes around. Or to treat others the way you want to be treated. Or pay it forward. There are hundreds of thoughts and ideas that surround the concept of karma. At the end of the day, whatever you do, be it good, bad, generous, unfavorable, all of these actions are metaphorically tallied up by the powers that be, and served to you the way you served it. It’s not necessarily about punishment or reward, in fact, karma or karmic responses stand as a reminder of how we are responsible for our lives. Karma teaches us lessons, sometimes over and over again until we’re aware enough to learn. Or at least make the connection between our action and reaction and work accordingly.

That’s why this collection of stories is so deliciously satisfying. Not only does the person witness or get their karma served to them, but this transaction also happens on the spot. It’s instant karmic gratification at its finest! Like the woman making fun of the rescue llama who had reconstructive surgery. She wouldn’t stop picking on the poor animal, so what did the sassy llama do? The llama spit on the woman! Perfect instant karma! Read on for more of these gems and learn vicariously through them. Also, consider maybe doing a good deed and adding to your own karmic bank account!
34. Don’t Want To Pick Up Poop? Better Get Ready For It To Come Back At Ya!

“The other day I was taking my dog for a walk around the neighborhood.

She squatted down to take a poop and I reached for my doggie bags only to realize I was fresh out. So I peeked around making sure nobody was looking, and I just left it.

10 minutes later I’m walking across the road and I cut through a thin grass median in the center and what do you know – I step in dog ***.

I* wasn’t even mad, I knew I deserved it.” HuskyInfantry
33. Want To Cut Through Traffic? I’ll Block You

“Sitting on a highway late at night because of a bad car accident. The highway was packed and barely moving.

One guy thinks he’s smarter than everyone else and tries to drive on the shoulder.

He makes it far ahead enough before running into an on-ramp, also packed with cars. He had nowhere to go, and no one let him in. He was stuck between cars in the rightmost lane and cars from the on-ramp. Everyone stuck bumper to bumper and flowing around him.

I went from watching him pass me and almost getting out of my view to passing him and losing sight of him in my rear view.”Curmud6e0n
Another User Comments:
“My father told me a story once from when he was younger. He was in traffic on a two-lane two-way road. It was backed up in one direction heading into an event of sorts, so it wasn’t a high-speed situation where people’s lives are endangered but there was sparse traffic going the other way.

My father starts seeing this tool in his rearview who would pull out from the traffic into the oncoming lane, drive as far as he could before a car started to approach from the other direction, and then get someone to let him back in. After doing this a few times, he gets up to my father when he needs to get back in. My father doesn’t budge and the guy has to throw it in reverse and back up all the way to the end of the line.

Of all the fantastic things my father’s done in his life and all the lessons he’s taught me, if I’ve taken away one thing, it’s that I will never let THAT GUY in.” [deleted]
32. Texting And Driving? See You In Court!

“I got rear-ended in a turn lane by a girl texting.

She was doing 45mph and I was stopped. No major injuries.

I went to her court date hoping she got a big fine or something. She got a $50 ticket. I was a little bit upset.

As I was sitting at the stop light to pull out of the court I watched her run a red light and t-bone a cop. I don’t normally laugh at other people’s misfortune, however, I laughed my a*s off at that one.” SicCorona
31. Looking For Trouble? You’ll Get In Trouble

“Last Saturday I was on a crowded NYC subway at 2 am. Two drunk dudes, young 20’s, lighting up a special cigarette and walking around flaunting it.

The whole train kept ignoring them, and they kept parading around being a bunch of morons. They spotted two taller, athletic looking dudes and started making fun of them for ‘looking like cops.’

It was the line, ‘which one of you is the sergeant??’ that finally put the athletic guys over the edge. They looked at each other, smiled, reached into their pocket and pulled out their badges. ‘Okay boys, empty your pockets.’

The subway blew up in laughter, they would have gotten away with EVERYTHING if they just didn’t go bother the two plain-clothes police officers. Score one for the good guys! And then I went home and smoked my own special cigarette in my living room.” patricio12345
30. Steal Our Fire Pit? The Ocean Will Take It Back

“I’m from San Diego and during the summer, you have to a claim bonfire pits on the beach really early in the morning if you want it for that night.

So my friends and I got to the beach at 8 am and stayed there so we could get a bonfire going into the night. Just before sundown, this one couple asks if they could share the bonfire with us and since our group wasn’t too big, we decided to share it with them. However, that couple proceeds to bring a group of like 15 others and they literally surrounded the pit and pushed us out.

We were pissed but we were so tired from being at the beach all day that we decided to head out. Little did we know, that night had an extremely high tide warning and when we moved all of our stuff over the wall that divided the beach walk with the beach, a huge wave came in and washed out that whole group surrounded by our bonfire.

The wave flipped over their table of food, took a handful of sandals back into the ocean, and destroyed all their stuff. The best part was this one girl was trying to jump the wall to save herself but she didn’t jump high enough and ended up falling right back into the waters.” 5hunned
29. Hide My Hockey Puck? Best Of Luck!

Just when you think you’ve found the best spot to hide something, but oops! It comes right back at ya!

“When I was a kid, we visited Montreal. I had gotten a hockey puck as a souvenir. While we were in our hotel, my sister decided to mess with me by hiding it.

I got mad and yelled in my high pitched voice, ‘GIVE ME BACK MY HOCKEY PUCK!’ before smacking her in the head with a pillow. Guess where she had hidden it.” rnilbog
28. Try To Freak Me Out? Those Guys Will Knock You Out

“I was working in a pub in Liverpool and had just arrived, at about 10 am, to start my shift. I knocked on the door and waited for someone to let me in. I became aware of some voices shouting and turned around to see two guys, shirts off, swaggering towards me talking in a language I didn’t understand.

They came right up to me and what little English they did speak came out. They called me a ‘******* wh*re’ and a ‘******* ****’* etc. Just nasty stuff and I was really quite scared. I was knocking on the door really hard at this point but after insulting me and laughing, they walked off towards a busy road.

I watched them as they walked out into the traffic waving their arms at the cars to stop for them then giving the drivers the finger. Suddenly, one of the cars stopped and four big guys got out. One of the nasty dudes ran off but the ‘big man’ got caught and shoved, hard, against the car a couple of times clearly hurting his head and elbow.

Then one of the car guys made out that he was going to punch him, big time, drawing his fist far back. The little jerk just covered his face and screamed. They didn’t get hit but the car guys and a lot of passers-by burst out laughing. They let him go and he ran away.” Tang_Fan
27. Don’t Like Working With Me For No Reason? There’s The Door

“I worked as a bartender at a bowling alley. For some reason one of the other bartenders hated me. She was constantly poaching people on my side (horseshoe-shaped bar, so we each got a side), we split tips and whenever it was her turn to count them down I know she wasn’t splitting them properly, tried to get the scheduling manager to put her on my days, etc.

One of my regulars even said she caught her pocketing tips and not putting them in our communal bucket while I was working with her.

Well, tournament season started, which everyone dreaded/looked forward to. Dreaded because the shifts were twice or three times as long as normal and there was a constant rush of people at the bar. Looked forward to because shifts were two or three times as long as normal and there was a constant rush of people at the bar, so we’d make as much in a day as we did in a week.
Well, the first tournament comprised teams that she considered ‘hers.’ They bowled on her side on the days she worked, so she knew them well and was looking forward to their tournament tips.

She came in, saw that I was scheduled to bartend that day, and flipped out. She started ranting to the manager (who happened to be the scheduling manager) and the owner of the place happened to be standing there. The owner pretty much said I was one of the better bartenders so I was getting put on the tournaments, and if she didn’t like it she could just leave.

My coworker left. And then I got to work her normal shifts as well.” Diredoe
26. Want To Be A Bully? Pay The Price

“I went to a small school with about 80 students. In my class, there was 12.

Although our numbers were small, we still had the classic bully archetype. Let’s call him Christopher. Christopher was one of those kids who felt like he could do whatever he wanted to anyone else, and he would be absolved of all blame if he finished his routine with ‘It’s just a joke.’ Basically, he was a grade-A horrible person.

Enter the second major character. There was also a mentally challenged kid in our class. Let’s call him Todd. Now, Todd was fond of asking questions. It was just his own way of obtaining information. I know this might sound bad, but we got annoyed with him pretty soon.

Hey, we were just kids. Now although Todd annoyed us, we still all looked after him. He was one of us, sometimes that was a good thing, sometimes a bad thing.
We basically ruled the school, and naturally, this power would go to our heads. And it corrupted nobody quite as much as Christopher. We were playing rounders, (a UK version of baseball) practicing for an upcoming competition. Split up into two teams, and made to play against each other. I was kinda mad because Todd was on my team, and as you can imagine, he wasn’t the most athletically gifted. Picture Kermit The Frog trying to Run the 110m hurdles.

THAT unathletic.

We were losing, due in no small part to the other teams’ superior members. I had lost interest, and only gave lackluster hits when it was my turn. Then it was Todd’s turn. I watched, just to see how it would go. And I looked at the other team. Christopher was pitching the ball.

He wasn’t even giving Todd a chance. He’d throw the ball at his feet, and burst out laughing with his team. Babe Ruth couldn’t have done a **** thing with that kind of throw. It went on for 3 minutes. Eventually, his own team got sick of him and told him to give a decent throw so Todd could strike out and the game could progress.

He throws it, and Todd braces himself. We’re all watching by now. Todd has tears in his eyes, the kind of thing humiliation does to someone like that. And as the ball draws closer, the world moved in slow motion for me.

WHACK. Todd didn’t just hit the ball with the bat, he absolutely annihilated it. The BAAAANGGGGG was heard all over the school. It sounded like a bomb had gone off, localized entirely around the side of the bat.

So what does a ball do when it’s met with a force like that? I don’t know for sure, but in this case, it went back towards Christopher at Mach 3 speed.

I didn’t even see the ball on its way back. It was like a bullet from a pistol. When it got to Christopher, it hit him squarely in the eye. He fell down, out cold. One of his friends helped him inside, while the rest of us, both teams, cheered and laughed. We lifted Todd on our shoulders and gave him a heroes support.” dannymation
25. Illegally Get Me Fired For A Condition I Can Control While On The Job? Pay Up

“I was working at a mental health facility for the elderly as a nurse, worked there for over a year with a perfect work record.

I worked for the same company at another elderly facility also for the same amount of time with a perfect work record.

My coworker found out I have PTSD and decided to tell my boss at the psych facility that I have PTSD and together, they both plotted to have me committed.

One day, they launched their attack. I was working a 7am-3pm shift and doing very well for 2 hours when my boss called me into her office to congratulate me on one year of service. When we were in her office alone she started grilling me about my mental health and how it plays out at home.

Next thing I know she’s forcing me to call my coworker who is off duty and making me go with her to the psych emergency because I have PTSD.
The entire meeting was designed to stress me out and cause me to be triggered enough to behave poorly or crazy somehow to rationalize the next step which was to cart me off to emergency and when they see me they will instantly know I belong locked away in a padded room.

They didn’t though. The hospital said I was fine, just stressed out about being forced to go to the hospital like a crazy person for no reason other than admitting I had PTSD.

After the hospital let me go, my boss put me on extended medical leave without telling me, ignored all my calls for two weeks and wrote letters lying about me to her bosses and the HR dept.

I filed a union grievance, and a complaint with a third party whistleblower company for my company’s head office to hear about.

My boss lied about me to everyone. She said I told her I had a murderer in my head, that I was standing in front of mirrors with knives wanting to cut flesh. They believed her so they shut down my complaints.
I took it to the human rights tribunal, self-represented against the largest long term care provider in North America  – and I ******* won.

It took three long years from incidents to the end of the court. It was the hardest thing I have ever done.

My employer’s health declined considerably by the time the trial happened. She lost her job, she had to move to the mainland, and there is a forever public record about what she did. The coworker who helped my boss has a permanent record and the employees of the job site were ordered to learn what she and our boss had done to me, as well as the outcome.

She will never be comfortable at that job site again and who/what she is is known to all.

I got the highest amount awarded for damages to dignity and self. I created a precedent for other PTSD persons with clean work history who do a good job on the clock but have very real struggles with PTSD symptoms at home. No karma could possibly taste better than 40k and a clear reputation.” sowhatnoweh
24. Steal A Decorated Egg? Be Prepared For What’s Inside!

“On a trip backpacking around Greece once, I had a bad experience in a hotel and decided to take one of their beautifully painted stone eggs from the bowl in the reception as compensation. When we were on the ferry to the next island, I started noticing a horrible smell coming from my bag.

It turns out that it was not a stone egg at all, but a painted boiled egg that had broken in my bag, the whole thing had become so rotten it had turned a nice shade of green and the smell was almost intolerable. I had to borrow a lot of clothes for the rest of the trip but at least it taught me a good lesson.” JD3313
23. Hot Girl Taking Over The Bar? She Forgot One Little Detail

“A number of years ago, my then bf and I were at our local dive-bar having a few beers mid-afternoon as per usual.

All is good until this petite chick with a rockin’ body strolls in and very blatantly is flaunting all she’s got to every guy there, including my bf. I’m a decade older than her and I’m like whatever. As long as she doesn’t actually come over and actually try this crap up close and personal, let her have her fun cause days when you feel this good about yourself are far and few between.

Eventually, every guy is so distracted that the whole place is completely malfunctioning: The bartender is too busy flirting with her that he doesn’t keep our beers coming as usual and my opponent at the pool table is not mentally present and the game is becoming a cake-walk.

Now I’m annoyed. Of course, anything I say will sound like I’m jealous and envious so I say nothing and seethe silently as I salvage what I can of my happy hour.

Cue Karma: She sashays up to the bar again in her tall wedges and mini skirt, climbs on top of the stool, kneels on the stool and leans forward toward the bartender -no panties. ****? Only if you like the sight of a ****** tampon string hanging out!! That next beer was especially satisfying and delicious.” stringytaco
22. Pick On Someone You Don’t Know? Get Ready For Anything

“A shy, meek, new kid on the block I used to pick on beat the living daylights out of me.

I was 10 and he was 12. We lived on the same street and he would walk past my house on the way home from school. After several days of teasing him, he paused and stared into my eyes. I walked up towards the driveway and got in his face, at which point he unleashed the craziest barrage of punches and kickboxing combinations that I simply did not expect. I took a few to my eye and bloodied my face. Needless to say, he made me cry and run away.

This was one of the most transformational experiences of my life. It taught me self-control, humility, and absolute respect for the hidden strengths of people around me.” neospyro
21. Caught In A Verbal Fight That Gets Physical? Good Thing The Camera Is On!

“I was working with this awful woman at the sandwich shop where I work.

She was 17, I was 18. I was telling a coworker about how my boyfriend had proposed to me, and b*tchface comes up behind me and says, ‘I bet he only proposed because the condom broke.’ It caused me to burst into tears because I’d also just recently found out that there was only a 2% chance that I could have kids, and I was still very sensitive about it.

After coming out of the supply room (I went in there to cry), I asked her to come out the back door with me, so I could have a word with her.

I didn’t want customers to hear us, because we likely would have ended up yelling. Anyway, I told her to keep her nose in her own business and blah blah blah. She decided to slap me, pretty hard, too. I didn’t hit her back, because we were directly in front of a camera. So, I went inside and called my boss. He had seen it on the live feed at home and had recorded it. He was already on his way. He came in and dragged her out the back and fired her. Last I heard, she was unemployed, pregnant, and stuck with some deadbeat ******.*” [deleted]
Another User Comments:
“This terrible girl who bullies me because I’m a bit of an outcast in my high school said to me, ‘the only reason why you are here is because your grandma was a wh*re who gave birth to your wh*re mother!’ My grandmother died the day before this comment.

The principal overheard her (the principal and I are good friends and knew about my grandmother’s passing) and now she can’t walk out across the stage with her class on graduation.” [deleted]
20. Overwork Your Best Employee? See You Never!

“My first job out of high school was working for a rather famous and nation-wide guitar store chain. At first, I thought it would fun, getting to be around guitars all day, and talking music with fellow musicians. Turns out I was wrong, and that 10-hour shifts 5-6 days a week while listening to slightly-too-loud overhead music and 14-year-olds play the first 5 bars of ‘Crazy Train’ over and over and over again wasn’t actually all that great.

But I stuck it out, I needed the money and I have one of those ‘don’t quit ever’ attitudes.

When I got hired, the store was in serious trouble. They had recently fired a huge chunk of the staff for skimming profits and selling ***** out of the warehouse. Their numbers were really low and corporate was breathing down their necks. But, as it turns out, I have a penchant or selling stuff that I know about. I was the accessories guy and got really, really good at it. I was routinely rolling $30k or better a month out the door, and the most expensive thing I had in my department was only $500.

I also had one of the lowest return rates on the west coast, and a file with several letters from happy customers saying how much help I had been. Eventually, the store’s numbers improved, especially my department. Eventually, we were #1 for our district, and #3 on the west coast, behind Hollywood and San Francisco.
However, NONE of that mattered to the GM or anyone from corporate. All they wanted was more from me. My numbers had to be better every month, or I’d get yelled at. I was written up for having a low sales month one January because I went on vacation.

I would get daily emails and phone calls from the district and regional managers, demanding to know why I hadn’t hit $xxxx in sales yet. My hours got bumped up to the point where my days consisted of sleeping, showering, eating, and working. I had zero social life. My gf at the time would go weeks without seeing me. Eventually, because of the stress, I developed an ulcer. So I decided to quit.

I threw myself into my last month, which just happened to be December, the month all retail workers hate. I worked extra hours, sold as much as I could, contacted old customers, you name it.

Blew everyone out of the water, rolling just shy of $80,000 in gear. My boss called me into his office, and said I was doing a good (not great, good) job, and to keep it up. I pointed to the sales numbers screen, pointed out how well I had been doing and how well liked I was by the customers and asked for a raise. He laughed and said no. So I handed him my resignation letter. 2 weeks later I was done and starting classes in college, something I’d had to put off since work wouldn’t allow me to cut hours for school.

I came back to the store a couple of months later, as someone who had worked with me called and said they’d found a jacket of mine in the warehouse. When I showed up, the GM wasn’t there. I asked, and what I was told was that apparently, corporate HAD noticed me, and when my GM had failed to retain me, they’d fired him. Also, that department went from #1 to #9 in the district, out of 11 stores. The district managers were scrambling to recover, a few got demoted because of how things panned out, and the extreme higher-ups were not happy that the district was in such a state.

I laughed the laugh of the vindicated.” Osiris32
19. Treat Your Employees Like Crap? Only Until One Becomes Your Boss

“Two regions of my company merged into one. The manager of the other region was a complete jerk. He was about 5’2 and walked around like he had something to prove. He treated all my employees like garbage and made them feel as though the reason they were choosing the other site over ours was because of the quality of work when in reality they got tax breaks in the other state. Our numbers were far better in every category. But… their labor was cheaper and that is what mattered to the company.

They gave my employees 4 months notice.

At first, they all thought it was a good thing so they could get paid while looking for another job. Nope. He made their lives absolutely miserable. He doubled their quota much higher than his own region, cut commissions down by 40%, and made weekly visits chewing me and the other sales manager out for not hitting the new goals and that there was absolutely no excuse. One month… the second to last month, we hit the new goal (not for him – to get our employees paid finally) and he then reamed us out because of the amount of vacation time used.

Even after explaining employees needed days off because they were interviewing other places… since we’re laying them off and that I would not deny anyone time if they have it available. He tried getting me fired for this but I had too many friends.
This is where the karma comes in. I had worked closely with some corporate folks over the 2 years I was there. They found out my region was being shut down and thought I would make a GREAT fit in their corporate office to be in charge of operations. Operations over the midwest region. ******** region.

I kept it quiet.

I didn’t make any mention of it until I showed up at his office with a clipboard and a laptop. You should have seen the confusion in his eyes.

Him: ‘Are you visiting or something?’

Me: ‘You could say that.’

Him: ‘Well I need to make sure security knows you’re here.’

Me: ‘Oh, they know, I just had to show them my badge.’

I whip out my badge and show him. My picture… in front of the red white and blue flag. Only people that have a photo in front of a red white and blue flag are corporate employees. His a*s was mine, and his face showed sheer terror behind his twitching lips.

I was fair to his employees, but boy did I report every rude and a*sholish incident that went down there. His lack of cooperation, his condescending demeanor towards his own employees, it only took a few weeks for him to pack up boxes. Apparently, employees had been complaining for a long time and it only took a little corporate push to get him out. Most. The most satisfying moment in my working career… ever.” JustForCancer
18. Decide To Go With The Cheapest Company For The Job? Get Ready For The Worst Results

“I’m an IT consultant and have a reputation of being really competent with Microsoft Exchange Server.

A couple of years ago, I bid on but did not get a project to upgrade an Exchange 2003 environment to Exchange 2010. Multiple servers, multiple sites and right up my alley. The firm that won the bid did so by pricing it extremely low, about 40% below my price which was on the low end to begin with. Totally unrealistic pricing but they thought they could pull it off with their people. Their people were good generalists but did not have a handle on Exchange 2010.

I told the customer – who I’d done work for before and who I’d had a good relationship with – that it was not going to end well for them.

They took it as sour grapes on my part. Fair enough. I had plenty of other things to do anyway so I just moved on.
Two weeks after they started the implementation phase of the job, the other consulting firm augured in. The entire email system stopped working. No mail coming in or out, no mail flowing between any of the Exchange servers, everything just dead in the water. I find this out when I get a call late one evening at my home from the other consulting company begging me to pull them out of the fire. I told them no thanks.

An hour later, the owner of the other firm is at my front door trying to convince me to help them ‘for the sake of the customer.’ This is well after dark and the conversation does not go well. He ends up screaming at me and I slam the door then call the cops because I’m tired and afraid that I’ll do something stupid if I continue to interact with the guy.
Cops come, he loses it, they arrest him for disorderly conduct and I have his **** car blocking mine in my driveway. I have it towed off (I had to pay for the privilege too).

He spends the next 24 hours in jail.

The customer called me the following day and I again declined to fix the mess. By this time, I’d decided I didn’t want any of that crap on me, period.

The customer ends up getting Microsoft Services in to fix everything (cost them about 5 times what I was going to charge, by the way). The customer sues the other consulting firm, which promptly files for bankruptcy/closes its doors rather than deal with the lawsuit.” DallasITGuy
17. Want To Be A Jerk While I’m Learning To Drive? I’ll Set You Up Nicely

“My stepdad is a driving instructor.

I went to get my license pretty late (22). One day he was giving me a lesson and we were going over one of the possible courses that the test takes.

While we’re driving down a street in the suburbs some guy is tailgating me reeeeeeally closely. He’s a totally gangster looking guy who looked pretty much exactly like Scumbag Steve now that I think about it…sideways hat and all. Every time I come to a stop sign, I do a full stop, obviously, and he throws his hands in the air and yells obscenities. It’s starting to stress me out, but my stepdad says, ‘don’t worry about it, watch this.’

As we’re going down the street he says, ‘OK, now in about 50 feet I want you to start slowing down a little bit and right when you are in front of that school zone, pull over to the right.’ So I do it, right after I pull over, the guy who is right pissed at me now and takes off like a bullet.

And about 5 seconds later a cop steps out from behind a tree and waves him over for going probably double the speed limit in a school zone. We laughed. Hard.” ZombiGrinder
16. Kid Being A Brat? He Can Say Bye To The Games He Wants

“I worked at a Kmart in high school. It was a small store, so I worked everything, electronics, stocking, cashier. You name it, I did it. I asked a woman and her son, about 12 or 13, if they needed help finding anything as I was out on the floor. The kid immediately lashes me out for annoying him.

I ignore it and go about my business. Right after that, I get called to the checkout. As I’m working there, here comes the pair.

The kid has gone all out back in the electronics area, with some EA sports titles and a GTA game. I’m checking them out when the age prompt comes up for the M rated game. I decide to take a chance. I flip the game over and inform the mother that, ‘This game has been rated M for the following reasons’ and read the list off the back of the case. There is an awkward silence, then she angrily informs me that the son said it was only a little violent.

The kid wasn’t able to get anything that day.” AMathmagician
15. Offer To Pay For A Meal? Better Be Willing To Follow Through

“I was flying cross-country on a space-available ticket and ended up having a layover in Chicago. I was walking around trying to find a restaurant close to my hotel and I passed this dude on the street, begging for some money to buy something to eat.

Now I’m used to seeing people with a cardboard sign or whatnot, but actually approaching people was pretty new to me. I thought to myself, ‘man, this guy is probably just looking for drug or booze money and I’m going to call his bluff!’

So I walk up to him and say, ‘Tell you what: I won’t give you any money, but I’m on my way to get a bite to eat and if you want, you can come with me and I’ll get you whatever you want.’ I was feeling pretty cocky and figured he would turn me down with some excuse.

‘Absolutely!’

I…was not expecting this.
So he picks up his stuff and starts walking with me and we settle on some Ruby Tuesday or Applebees’ish place. He says he can’t decide between a big steak or ribs, and I wave him off with my hand and tell him I have no problem buying him both.

As we eat, he pulls out the biggest knife I’ve ever seen in person (I’m talking, like, Crocodile Dundee stuff.)He puts it on the table and says to me, ‘I can’t tell you how ******* hungry I was. Everybody was passing me on the street, some of them would glare or ignore me, some would talk **** or toss in their two cents because I just wanted ***** or booze.

I told myself the next ************ who had something clever to say to me was getting cut.’

I was absolutely frozen.

The conversation eventually moved. We both finished our dinners, and I talked him into dessert. In the process, I told him I was extremely interested in his knife and was in the market for one. I offered him 250 bucks for his. He was ecstatic and sold it to me.

I just figured that dude really didn’t need a knife on him like that, and he could use the money. I gave it to a cop and said I found it on the street.

Maybe some life was saved, who knows. Life taught me a few lessons that night: Don’t judge, people aren’t always who you think they are. Be nice.” [deleted]
14. Break The Rules Of Hide And Go Seek? Suffer The Consequences Of Finding A Really Good Hiding Spot!

“My little sister’s friend was being a real jerk to me; following me around, mocking everything I said, making rude commentary on everything I did. I told her she shouldn’t do things like that to someone older than her because it could have dire consequences. Anyhow, they conned me into playing hide and seek with them and the rules were to STAY IN THE HOUSE.

I searched high and low for that little jerk and couldn’t find her anywhere. My sister had no clue either, and neither of us heard the door open, so we didn’t think she could be out there. Turns out the kid decided to say EFF THE RULES and go outside. Well, she hid in the back of my mom’s truck. It has a camper shell that can be locked from the outside.

I guess someone saw it open and locked it while the kid was hiding inside. She ended up ******* her pants. I volunteered to unlock it and I took my sweet time, staring at her with this **** eating grin.

It was great.” andianopolis
13. Angrily Change Your Mind About Paying For Dinner? You’re Missing Out

“Was out for dinner with my then-fiancee (now wife) and her dad, my (now) father-in-law. He’s a total jerk to her. He got divorced and re-married, loves those kids more than my wife, gives her a hard time over too many things, etc. etc.

So we’re at the end of dinner when father-in-law offers to pay for the meal. OK, that’s nice. My wife asks to get her leftovers boxed and she’ll take them home. He starts with, ‘well, you’ll just leave them in the fridge, then they’ll just get thrown out, blah blah.’ I tell him, ‘Listen, it’s not your fridge, leave her alone.’ She and I are living together at this point.

He gets all mad, ‘Don’t tell me how to raise my daughter!’

I reply, ‘Then don’t speak to my fiancee that way!’

He literally throws the bill and folder thing at me and says, ‘FINE! YOU ******* PAY THEN’ and storms out.

OK, now everyone is pissed. My fiancee is saying, ‘Why did you have to start something??’ etc. So I pay the bill and I’m just waiting for the receipt. Like we’re waiting 10 minutes here, what the **** is going on? Tensions are rising, her dad is waiting outside, just building up steam and ready to blow once we get out there.

I ask the waiter, ‘Can I just get our bill and go?’

‘Oh no sir, you have to wait for the manager.’

Turns out they have a contest running where ‘every bill is a winner.’ Normally you’ll win a free drink or appetizer with your next meal. Well, we won the GRAND PRIZE, a trip for 4 to Florida. Whoever pays gets the prize. WELL GUESS WHAT ****? I PAID BECAUSE YOU STORMED OUT LIKE AN ******.*” [deleted]
12. Physically Harm Your Girlfriend? Get Your Legs Broken

“When I was a teenager, I was in a van with a bunch of my friends. We stopped for gas at a place on a busy intersection.

One of my friends points out some action happening in a car parked next to the street and says, ‘He’s beating the **** out of her!’

Sure enough, some ******* is bouncing his girlfriend’s head off the dashboard. Now we were no innocent teenagers, and this van was our mailbox-baseball-mobile. We grabbed our bats and prepared to intervene. But just as we were getting out, the girl grabs the keys out of the guy’s ignition and throws them into the street.

I can see the rest in slow motion, clear as day, even though it happened more than 20 years ago. The guy races out of the car in a huff, runs into the street and bends to pick up his keys.

He gets back up, points at the car, and starts to yell something, his face red with rage. Just then a little sports sedan turns the corner at full speed and hits him straight on in the legs. The guy does a flip over the car and falls into a limp pile. Girlfriend runs to him, crying in remorse.
We were in no way prepared to stick around and talk to the cops, so this was the last I knew of things until a few years later.

One night, back from college on winter break, I was telling this story at a party.

A girl looks at me funny, starts asking me questions about the date and location. She was really freaking out. Turns out she was the driver that hit the *******, only she didn’t know he was an *******. No one at the scene, including the girlfriend, said anything about the abuse. The driver had felt guilty for years about running down some innocent guy that just happened to be standing in the road, crippling him for life. My chance retelling of the story took a huge burden off her.” [deleted]
11. Steal From Your Favorite Pizza Shop? No More Pizza For You

“I go to New York City about once a year to visit family.

While there, I always crave the ‘Grandma’s Sicilian’ pizza, and the best slice in the city is served near my cousin’s place.

Well, it’s New York, and naturally the joint is crowded. Across from the register, you can grab drinks and pay for them, or you can grab drinks and walk away. The cashier can see you take a drink, but 90% of the time is occupied with a customer. The whole interaction really comes down to the honor system as well as how bold you are.

I’ve never really stolen before, but my cousin just nonchalantly took a drink and nobody said a word! I do love me some Peach Snapple so I got greedy and took two of them.

I paid for the food and we were on our way out. I was on an (admittedly silly) adrenaline rush.

Did I mention my craving for the pizza was so large that I got an entire pizza instead of just one or two slices? Yep, an entire pie for myself.
So as we are walking back to the subway station, I trip on the curb and fall. I land on the pizza with my stomach, covering my clothes in the sauce. Both Snapples shatter and the glass lodges itself in my knuckles, palms, and legs. The brand new $60 jeans I purchased the day before got ripped by the glass and stained by my *****.

Despite cleaning the wounds properly, the ones on my hand became infected that night.

Suffice to say I haven’t stolen since.” alexisaacs
10. Be A Jerk Cop? Not For Long

“Last summer I was driving home from a friend’s house when I saw a fawn on the side of the road. I slowed down and saw that her tail was moving. I threw on my hazards and sat with her. She must’ve just been stunned, and maybe lost a tooth when she hit the pavement since there was ***** on her mouth. I pulled her tongue out, she swallowed. I felt her legs, no soreness or heat.

She was just in shock. I called my on-call vet, as I’m a horseback rider and I know my basic first aid, but he said his trailer wasn’t available and to try getting her in my car so I can let her rest safely at my house where she can freely wander back into the woods. I only lived less than a mile from where I sat with the fawn, and I contemplated it. I could hear the mother bleating and the fawn was reacting, she was alive and responding.

I helped her up on her wobbly legs. She was still shakey and could only walk a few steps without tripping.

I brought her back down to the ground and I sat with her for at least 45 minutes, petting her head and feeling her heartbeat calm. She was ready to stand, as she was pulling herself up when suddenly a cop car comes flying down the road, lights, sirens, the whole shebang.
The fawn tried to run and dropped to the ground, all my hard work for nothing. The cop was an ******* and told me to leave, no hello or anything, just ‘You can leave now.’ I told him I called the vet, I told him the fawn’s progress and that she’s fine, I’m just going to pull her into the woods.

Her mother was still bleating for her, and the fawn was still responding.

The cop told me to leave again, and as I got in my car and turned around I heard his gun go off. He killed a healthy deer who was unable to escape from him. I was bawling in my car. The next morning I called the local police who wouldn’t give me the time of day. Okay, that’s fine I’ll just call the state police they care if you’re illegally hunting while on duty! And they did care. They later fired the cop as he had a number of complaints against him.

It was the saddest moment of my life.” kizmet_
9. Get Told It’s Not Up To You How She Parents? Cue Slow Clap

“I was a lifeguard at a well-known chain of indoor waterpark hotels in the US and a woman was letting her less than 2-year-old daughter play in the shallow end all by herself while she sat in a chair and read a magazine.

I walked up to her to let her know that it was not safe for a child that young to be by herself. The mom started yelling at me, telling me that it was not my business how she parented and to leave her alone.

At this point, everyone around her is staring.

As soon as she finishes her rant, her daughter loses her balance and falls face first into the water, and is too young to know how to stand back up to get her face out of the water and breathe. I run in, grab her daughter and bring her back to her mom. Everyone around who was staring began to clap.” phoenix25
8. Obstruct First Responders? Get In Really Big Trouble

“While working for the fire department, on a call for a multi-vehicle rollover accident on the interstate. We got on the interstate, one exit away, running into traffic, so we moved over to the emergency lane with lights and sirens.

We were about halfway there and a BMW pulls in front of us trying to cut through the traffic, he didn’t even look.

I laid into the air horn and he came to a complete stop with his middle finger out the window.

I’d had a lot of people do stupid things when seeing lights coming at them, but this guy was being an a*s for the sake of being an a*s.

He got out of his car and started screaming at us.
Meanwhile, he was blocking the only fire engine and 2 ambulances available. People were really hurt half a mile away, and he was making his stand because we honked our air horn at him for blocking us.

I looked out at my mirror to see a highway patrolman running between lanes towards us – he was pissed.

BMW boy was immediately arrested, his pretty car got pushed out of the way into a ditch and he went to jail.

The people in the accident were hurt badly, and 2 cars had to be cut open to get the people extricated from bent metal.

It was frustrating.” CaptFluffyBunny
7. Call Me A Princess? At Least My Arm Isn’t Broken

“I worked at a grocery store. I was stocking Instant Noodles on a big sale display. All I had was a cheap small step 2 step stool, you know the one with the bar that runs across the top step? Reaching down to the stool from the shelf I was standing on, was about 3 feet.

I had a 60% chance my foot would land on the top bar and collapse the thing. I asked a coworker to use his shoulder as a handle as I got down. My supervisor called me a ‘princess’ for getting assistance.

Soon after, he was stocking the 2-Liter Coke bottles on a sales display. He tried to get down. He took the 40% success rate jump onto the step. Hit the top bar. The step ladder collapsed. He broke his arm and took down half of the display. I just clocked out and left before they told me to clean up the spilled soda all over the place.” ChileConCaveman
6. Steal My Shoes? She’ll Steal Yours!

“That time I had my shoes stolen! I was 17.

Went to a party where there were kids from two different high schools. When I went inside, I took off my brand new Nike Air Mada shoes that I had just bought for $140. Hours later, when I went to leave, my shoes were gone. We had an idea of who took them (a guy from the other school) but didn’t have proof. I was so sad and so embarrassed. I had to drive home in my socks.

A week later, Monica (the girl who threw the party) shows up on my doorstep holding something behind her back. Turns out she went to a party and saw the guy who stole my shoes – wearing them! When he took them off after a smoke break, she snagged them.

Now, standing in front of me, she reveals my Nikes!!! She told me the best part was watching him look for them (just like I had) and then leave in his socks!” cruisefromottawa
5. Think Wasabi Looks Innocuous? Not Until You Try It

“My dog tried to eat my sushi while I was away from the table for a second. I came back to missing wasabi and a disgusted-looking dog.”
N3MO_

Another User Comments:
“The first time I ordered sushi I was on a date. I thought the wasabi was avocado paste. I stole my date’s ‘avocado paste’ and put generous amounts on all my sushi bites.

I kept repeating, ‘I had no idea sushi was so ****** spicy!’ My date couldn’t figure out what I was talking about (as snot ran down my face) because the sushi we shared was definitely not the spicy kind. I finally admitted that I stole the ‘avocado paste’ and my date couldn’t stop laughing. I totally deserved it.” BudgetRentACat
4. Get Made Fun Of Over A Small Mistake? Wait Until It’s His Turn

“At a job as a mechanic, I got a part that was completely correct except the electrical plug was a different shape. I found out after I installed it (for the record it did plug in, it just didn’t have long enough prongs to communicate).

I had to order the right part again and take this one off and install the right one, all while only getting paid to put the correct one on (lost about 1.3 hours).

My co-worker laughed and said, ‘Bet you won’t make that same mistake again. Pay attention next time.’ On his very next job, he put all 4 tires on backward (some tires are directional). So, I said the same thing to him. I knew I would use it against him, I just didn’t know it would be that soon.  I made a hard-to0-spot mistake, and the dude made fun of me.

His VERY next job he made an easy-to-spot mistake, and I made fun of him.” GenerationSam
3. Tease A Rescue Llama? She Knows You’re Talking About Her

Even animals know when they’re being made fun of. They can sense it and they definitely know how to respond accordingly:

“I used to be a zookeeper.

This ***** was making fun of our llama for looking ugly. The llama was a rescue who had corrective jaw surgery.

The **** pointed and laughed at our llama.

The llama spat in her mouth.

I gave the llama a treat and told her that she was a good girl.” MyNameIsNotRyn
2. Harass The Special Needs Kid? Not After He Hits A Homerun

“A total jerkface I knew in high school was trying to get a mentally handicapped kid to do stuff for a ‘***********’ video in a very nasty cruel way behind the gym.

I’m sitting behind a car smoking in the parking lot.

The special kid is not dumb enough to play this game. Jerkface decides to get him to hold the camera, while people are heckling and calling out suggestions. Nothing interesting happens, then someone comes out with a basketball, puts it on the concrete sidewalk, then hands ******* an aluminum baseball bat and mimes hitting the basketball, like splitting a log with an ax.

******* winds up, brings it down and I hear ‘blaWHAAAAANK.’ His head is shooting back, ***** everywhere (from where I was, I thought he smashed his skull open).

The bat clatters like 20 feet behind him and he goes down backward.

The bat bounced, nailed Jerkface in the eyebrow, split it open, and knocked him the *** out. He was okay but had a scar and a **** of a black eye for a few weeks.

The whole time the mentally handicapped kid Jerkface had been trying to humiliate on camera is filming and laughing so, so, so hard he’s crying. Security didn’t believe nobody  hit Jerkface until he showed them the video.” throwawaybreaks
1. Help A Homeless Man Eat? Get Some Good Karma Coming Back At Ya!

“Not a case of bad karma. My friend and I were walking out of Walmart when a homeless man asked me for money for food.

I don’t ever carry cash on me. So I say I’m sorry I don’t have any and go to walk away. However, I had worked earlier that day and still had unopened snacks in my car. So I walk back up to him and say, ‘I don’t have any money but I do have some snacks and water in my car that I can give you.’ His face lit up. So I walked to my car, and grabbed the snacks and walked back. I hand him the bag, it had a granola bar, two bags of chips, some crackers and two water bottles.

He thanks me about 20x and I tell him to have a good day.

So I go to my friend’s house and we’re just hanging out and I’m scrolling through a citywide selling page on Facebook. I had just bought a new king size bed and didn’t have a bed set for it. I came across this beautiful solid wood frame with built-in drawers that was in perfect condition. The seller had it listed for $100. She was selling it because it didn’t fit in her new house. So I have my husband and some friends get a truck and we go to get it that same day.

I gave the lady the $100, and she mentions that ‘I meant to post it for $1,000 but mistyped. Since we already agreed on the price before I realized it, you can have it for the $100.’ I even tried offering her more money but she wouldn’t take it. And that’s how I gave a homeless man food and good karma greeted me with a practically new bed set for $100.” jerisun13
Sounds like the universe can respond pretty quickly when it wants to! These karmic paybacks are instant! No time was wasted in proving a point or learning a lesson. Anything similar happen to you? Tell us everything!