People Blurt Out Their Pettiest Revenge Stories
24. Mortgage Lender Snubbed Me, So I Snubbed Him Back
“A few years ago, when I was buying a house, I went to several lenders to get the best deal and rate. I have a credit score in the 800s and quite a bit saved, so I’m getting good offers. I’d also set up a spreadsheet to compare offers and calculate which would best suit my needs.
Most lenders were happy to describe interest rates, points, etc., so I could do my calculations. Most offers were very similar. According to my math, my shopping around would only save me a few hundred dollars over the life of the loan.
And that’s fine, doing the math to verify things has value.
However, one lender I called had this frustratingly rude representative. He’s from a company I’ll call Slicken Loans, and our conversation went something like this:
‘What do you want out of your loan?’ he asks. I’ve answered this question like ten times for other lenders, so I start to explain.
‘I want the best rate, and to save money in the long term. I–‘
‘Well, you’re a pretty standard first-time homebuyer. You’re going to need to make yourself stand out as a borrower.’
‘I’m sorry, what?’
‘Everybody wants the best rate,’ he says.
‘It’s the first thing anyone asks for.’
‘No kidding.’
‘That’s basic. We’ve got tons of people asking for loans. What is going to make you stand out?’
‘Just tell me your rate,’ I say. I have to give him some information for him to calculate it. Then he gives a number that is a tenth of a percent higher than the other offers I’ve gotten.
That would cost about 15k in the long run (after adjusting for inflation). There is now literally zero chance I’ll go with Slicken Loans.
I thank him and end the call.
Well, I went with a different lender. We were moving fast, so within two weeks I’ve gotten approved for my loan and I’m just waiting to close on the house. Everything is all set to go when the Slicken Loans scumbag calls me back.
‘So, I’m calling you to get started on the loan we talked about,’ he says.
‘I went with a different lender,’ I say.
‘What! Who?’ His voice has this quaver in it, like maybe he’s lost the last five borrowers he’s talked to and his performance review is coming up–or something.
‘Someone who gave me a better rate.’ I’ve no interest in giving him details.
‘Well, you know, we can flex on the rate.’
‘Can you? That’s unfortunate,’ I reply. And my petty revenge: ‘You really should have done more to make yourself stand out as a lender.’
He sputters about trying to match the other offer, and I tell him to pound sand.”
23. Entitled Mother Let Her Kids Into My Garden But Ended Up Getting Her Husband Arrested
“I (29F) don’t have any kids, but have my younger sister (16) living with me for around 10 years, and we have a trampoline still in our back garden from when she was younger.
The neighbor to the left of me has 4 kids and moved in a year ago. Two weeks ago, Glasgow started getting really good weather, so the kids have been out playing constantly, not an issue. They asked if I could let the kids use the trampoline one day, so I was like sure but only for a bit because I have friends coming over for some drinks.
7 pm comes, I ask them to go home because my 5 friends have shown up, and we’re going to be drinking.
Cue the crying, they leave the garden upset but hey, that’s not my issue, they’ve been on it for 3 hours at this point. Their mum pops her head out her bedroom window and asks if they can stay in the garden longer. Um, no? I’m not your babysitter.
She’s annoyed but drops it.
Last week, I come home from some shopping, and to my surprise, find all four of the kids in the garden, plus their younger cousin. Ask them to leave, tell them they can’t just come into my garden without me there and they didn’t even ask. They refuse to leave, so I shout up at their mum and tell her to get them out of the garden.
She says ‘Let them play for a bit, you don’t even use it.’
Okay but still, not your garden? Eventually, we get into an argument, and they leave, she’s ticked off and shouting saying I’m being a ‘Karen’ and I should let them in. I tell her not to ask again because the answer will be no. This happened again the day after, all 4 kids plus their cousin, waiting till I move the car from the drive and headed straight into the garden.
So I woke up this morning. I’ve since put a lock on the trampoline, just a small one on the mesh safety enclosure to stop them from opening it up (cos I’m petty). Plus it’s Saturday, I’m not working today, my day off and I want a long lie. But no, the neighbor decides that at 9 am this morning, her kids are being fired straight out of that house with breakfast bars and a bottle of water, and they head straight into the garden.
So I can hear them from my window, I look out and tell them to leave.
By the time I get downstairs, mum has descended from her house and is trying to climb the fence between our gardens, shouting about how I used to let them use it and she’s going to call the police for hitting her kids. Um, great, you do that. I’ll be sure to show them the ring camera footage, which coincidentally also has footage of your husband picking the lock open so your brats can use the trampoline.
So long story short, the entitled mother sends her kids into my garden repeatedly even after being told not to. Calls police on me for harassment and hitting her kids and ends up getting her own husband arrested for theft and housebreaking, and criminal damage.
******t, witch.”
22. Mechanic Tried To Scam Me But Ended Up Receiving Public Embarrassment
“I (26f) do not look like I would know a single thing about cars. 5’3 with long blonde hair, a soft girly appearance, and an eternal baby face that makes me look about 15-16 years old. I drive a rather beat-up-looking 2004 Avalon. My dad and brother are both mechanics. Not my profession, but I’ve learned a thing or seven from them and am very comfortable working on cars.
I’m only mentioning my appearance because it’s pretty common for mechanics to assume that I’m an idiot about cars.
A while back, I was pretty overwhelmed with life and didn’t have a good space to do it, so I took my car in to get the oil changed. The place offered a free-of-charge ‘head-to-toe’ inspection for any repairs that might need to be made.
I knew my car was fine. I had pretty recently changed the air filter and brake pads. Rotors had maybe 40k miles on them and were in great condition. New serpentine belt too. Literally just didn’t feel like changing my oil.
Note: Before I went to the shop I actually checked my air filter and it was, in fact, pristine. Also, I usually call my dad while I’m working on my car so we can chat so he knows what repairs/maintenance I’ve done and that my car is well taken care of.
After they changed my oil, the guy came back with the ‘inspection results’ on a clipboard and was holding my air filter. He had this grave look on his face like something was wrong. Mind you, this is a very busy place and there were lots of customers in the waiting room. He told me that we needed to go over the results because my car was about to be completely broken down and also not safe to drive if I didn’t get several repairs done as soon as possible because these were all completely shot.
The repairs: new brake pads, new rotors, new calipers, replace serpentine and drive belt, NEW AIR FILTER, new compressor or my AC will not work (a heavy threat in the middle of summer in FL), and a couple more generic things.
He showed me my air filter was filled with dead grass, A DEAD WASP, some dirt, AND HAIR. Bruh. He really scooped some bull crap off the shop floor and put it in my new air filter to try and freak me out.
The total? About $1500 worth of work. It would be more expensive anywhere else but he was ‘willing to give me a deal.’
So I immediately start buying myself time by asking some basic questions that I knew he would have to explain so I could nod at him all wide-eyed while I came up with a good way to respond to what he was doing.
‘What does the serpentine belt do? Is it important? Etc.’
I texted my dad, ‘I’m calling in a sec just play along.’ Told the guy, ‘Oh, that’s so scary I can’t believe I was driving around like that. Thank you so much for caring! I don’t have the funds so let me call my dad real quick to see if he can help me out.
I can’t afford this.’
I then proceeded to enhance my dramatic performance by even working up a tear while I called my dad.
The guy is standing there with me in front of all the customers. I put my phone on speaker and gave my dad a whole sob story about how I need funds again I’m so sorry can he help me?
He asked what the repairs were and how much.
I said ‘I don’t know but it sounds REALLY bad. He says that it’s dangerous. Dad, I can’t be without a car. What am I going to do?’
Then I asked the guy to tell my dad what the repairs were. He rattles it all off and my dad is playing his part PERFECTLY.
‘Oh wow’, ‘Mmhmm’, ‘oh my goodness I’m glad you caught this so she’s not in danger anymore.’ Little did this scammer know, he was the one in danger.
He hands the phone back and I dropped the façade and start laughing really hard. As soon as dad hears me he started scream cackling into the phone. I said ‘DAD DO YOU HEAR THIS BULL CRAP?!
Get this, he brought me my new air filter I just put in to show me how dirty it was. He pulled crap off the floor or something and rubbed it on there.’ Dad and I continue to crack up. The audience in the waiting room was also cracking up. Scammy Mechanny was beet red and completely at a loss for words. Head down and some stuttering was his response.
I handed him my air filter and told him to go vacuum it out and to make sure to let me see it before he put it back in. I sat and watched him put it back once it was clean and also watched him pull my car out to make sure he didn’t do anything horrible while I wasn’t looking.
I might have taken it a little far, but I REALLY hate when mechanics take advantage of people who don’t know anything about cars, so this felt like a massive win.
Big props to my dad for his performance, and for teaching me about cars.”
21. Won't Give Me Unemployment Benefits? You Won't Get Those Documents Back
“I worked at a Customer Service call center.
I was there for 7 years and created 33 new or updated documents for them to use because I’m highly trained in Microsoft Office programs (Word, Excel, etc.). These documents were used at 3 different branches of the company, in 3 different states. When I started having emotional problems and had to see a psychiatrist, they decided to get petty and tried to make me quit by treating me like crap, like giving me the horrible shift hours, making me miserable, demanding I do extra work, and then stating I wasn’t going to be getting our yearly raise because my work ethics had become erratic (though all of my coworkers were praising me for keeping up with their ridiculous demands).
Anyone who has had issues with a company who doesn’t want to have to pay unemployment benefits and would rather force you to quit will be highly aware of the type of tactics companies pull when in this situation.
I had originally put a watermark on all of the documents, but when I became so emotionally drained from having to deal with their demands and actually had to check into a psychiatric institution for a 48-hour hold, I had enough.
I knew I wouldn’t be coming back after I got out of the hospital, so right before I went to the hospital to check-in, I deleted the ONLY copies of 27 of the documents that were for internal use only and locked the last 6 with a password that I gave to one coworker friend who had already given her notice and only had two days left. Two days during a time that none of the higher managers were actually present because it was the weekend.
I ended up staying in the hospital for almost 2 weeks due to the emotional state I was in. During my third day of the hospital stay, the company called my house 5 times trying to get ahold of me to find out where I had put the missing documents and what the passwords were for the locked ones. My family stated specifically that because they had driven me to the point of having to go into the hospital, there was no way that they were going to ask me for any information that had to do with the company.
After the fifth call, my family told them that if they called again, they would report the company for harassment and stalking-like behavior. One of the managers actually tried to call the hospital to get ahold of me several times, only to find out that I wasn’t allowed to take any calls from anyone besides my family. On one call the manager tried to pretend they were family, only to discover that my family had given the hospital a list of my actual family members just in case someone from the company tried this tactic.
When I got out, the company called me 2 days later. When I picked up the phone, the person that had called had been one of the biggest perpetrators in the way they had been treating me over the past month of my employment. I told her flat out that the documents were gone for good, as were the backups, and the password-locked documents were set to delete after a month of when I’d locked them.
When the manager said they were letting me go, I said, ‘Thank you for the unemployment benefits’ and hung up on her!”
20. Having A Tantrum At The Bar? I'll Ruin Your Night
“I used to bounce along a strip that was very popular. Many of the bars along that strip were run by the same company I worked for. So I knew most of the bars, their managers and made friends with all the bouncers. It’s just the way it is y’see.
So this lady comes in with 5 other males. One of which appeared to be her significant other. So her partner disappears for a few minutes to go to the toilet. Meanwhile she begins dancing up on some random on the dance floor. Partner’s mates were drinking at their table away from the dance floor. Convenient. Anyhow, significant other comes back and isn’t too impressed with the rubbish going on so he kicks off.
Poor random cops a few punches to the face and of course we get involved and kick the lady, significant other, and the rest of the Jackson five. Lady meanwhile is trying to say that he came onto her. Yeah sure, lady. He came onto you and the only thing you could think to do was dance with him to scare him away. But she was tipsy so of course, it’s not her fault.
We kick them out and the rest of the boys follow along not long after. They took it really well. Significant other is still screaming outside and calling for more. Random man’s inside nursing a fat eye and I’m trying to keep that lady from rushing back in to fight him too. Honestly… I’ve had enough at this point and tell them all to bug off.
She even throws a few slurs at the random man inside. One of which was racial and because I related to it I thought it was time to ruin this lady’s night. They eventually walk off to try out the other bars while she’s still yammering about how much of a power trip I’m having.
The last thing I remember her saying was to go back home to my 5 other baby mamas.
Had a good laugh about that one.
I see them waiting in the queue at the bar across from me. So what do I do? Nothing yet. I wait for them to get just before the front of the line (15 min wait) and then I walk over and tell the bouncer what they just got kicked for. The friends catch the hint and ditch those two.
Good choice. She begins blubbering and crying about injustice and me being petty. I’m about to show you the meaning, lady. Her friends catch a cab and go home which just leaves my favorite two people in the world there.
They leave that line and attempt another bar on my side of the road but further in. Same thing again. Wait until they’re just near the front.
I radio in (the bars that are part of my company are all linked via radio for nights like this) to the head bouncer of that club and tell him which ones not to let in. I stand in front of the club just watching them in the line and I see them get denied at the door.
When they asked the head bouncer why, he pointed at me.
The look of disbelief on her face. I loved it. I just smiled and waved. She took off to another bar after having another tantrum. By then every one of our bars knew which ones to deny entry to because the other head doorman passed the info down the line. I watched her and her partner walk down the line and get denied by another two bars.
She came back to me still crying saying that I ruined her and her significant other’s night. She asked me how I could sleep at night knowing that I’m a crap person ruining random people’s nights. I replied ‘How do I sleep at night? Comfortably…. with my 5 baby mamas.’
That was the end of that. Please be nice to your bouncers.”
19. Boss Denied My Deserved Raise, So I Made Him Regret It
“September of 2019 is when I am laid off by a former boss who was ousting people in order to hire her friends (and start an embezzling scheme as I later found out).
At the time I did not really need the 2nd income as my wife has a great job and we took the opportunity to do some home renovations. Well in March 2020, I landed a role as a controller for a modest Property Management company here in East Cleveland. It was a lower-paying controller role, but I knew this was the next step in my career and it would benefit me, in the long run, to have ‘Controller’ on my resume… so I took the gig.
Fast forward to June of 2021 when we found out we were expecting our first child. I knew I needed to request a raise so I took multiple weeks to do market research on my role, experience, and company size. I even reached out to some recruiters I was connected with to confirm the salary range I should request to be in line with market standards.
I won’t give you exact dollar figures, but I requested a raise of $20K in order to get me up to the 10th percentile of market standards with all relevant factors. I didn’t even ask for the average salary… just the 10th percentile! I did all this 1 week prior to my (late) 1-year review.
Boss (also the owner) said he was disappointed in my letter requesting such a large increase and how sudden it was.
I stood my ground and said the raise was modest when compared to the market here in Cleveland. I was told the raise was not in the budget. Mind you that as the Controller, I CREATE THE DARN BUDGETS!!! I know good and well where our financials stand and I knew my raise would be a drop in the bucket. But my boss is greedy and our turnover was way too high because of this… but I digress.
He reluctantly gives me a raise that was pathetic and not anywhere near the 20K requested. He gives me a dollar figure that the Accounting department must stay under and says that it is my job to adhere to this. (This is important later). At the time I did not have another option so I shut my mouth and planned my revenge.
2 weeks later, my AP person quit due to not getting a raise (no surprise there).
Boss brings in his wife to work 20 hours a week until we fill the role. His wife is perfectly capable and quite smart, so I appreciated her offering to help. What I did not appreciate was seeing what he paid her on the next payroll. She was being paid 25% more than what I was being paid… and she only worked 20 hours compared to my 50. And when compared to the prior AP person, she was being paid 70% more.
This fueled my fire even more. We find a new AP person in September, but my boss keeps his wife on the payroll as a ‘consultant’ and continues to pay her 125% of my salary to do literally nothing. My internal fire is now white-hot.
It’s now Feb 2022 and I have just received an offer letter from a larger manufacturing company that pays great, has great benefits, and allows me to work a ton from home.
I draft a letter to my boss for my resignation fueled by his instructions about staying within the defined budget for the Accounting Department. I am cutting a salary to meet that figure… my salary. I gave 2 weeks’ notice because it wouldn’t look good to my new employer if I just quit.
I made sure that month end closing was started but not finished, made sure that my last day was 1 day prior to figuring payroll, and that all my intellectual property that helped with reporting and SOPs was deleted. We were also wrapping up the 2021 year-end with our CPA, but I didn’t really feel like working my butt off to finish that.
He did not speak to me for the last 2 weeks.
It’s now late April and I learned this morning that everyone under me has quit because they did not want to work for him after seeing how he dealt with me.
I don’t feel bad for him. He talks the talk about treating people fair and justly, but it’s darn time someone shows him that he doesn’t walk the walk.”
18. I Guess You Don't Want Your Glasses Back
“I am someone in my late 20s, a brown fellow living in the south. I have been a regular at this small restaurant for a few years and usually sit at the bar. Sunday morning I walk in and sit at the bar, directly behind me is a booth with 4 ladies in their 20s having breakfast. I don’t really pay much attention to them, the restaurant is pretty busy and all the waitresses are running around.
I make small talk with the waitress, get my coffee and order my food. As I wait at some point the ladies behind me had finished their food, left the booth, paid, and walked out. The table was being cleaned by another waitress and she finds a pair of glasses and asks the waitress who had the table about them. I said the ladies just left and are probably still outside in the parking lot and the waitress asked me if could flag them down and give the glasses back.
So being friendly I got the glasses, walked outside and find the ladies pulling out their car from the parking spot.
As I try to flag them to get their attention the two ladies in the front seat make eye contact, start laughing and then hit the gas without stopping, the ones in the back yell something and give me the middle finger. I said screw it threw the glasses in the trash can and walked back into the restaurant.
A few minutes later I am back inside, eating my food, I see one of the ladies walk back inside talking to the hostess, she points to the waitress that had the table and is inquiring about the glasses. I am not going to lie it felt good when they pointed at me and see the look on her face. When the waitress asked what I had done with the glasses I told them ‘I put them in the trash outside when they gave me the middle finger.’
I didn’t get an apology, the girl just walked out.
A few minutes go by, they come back in asking which trash can I put the glasses in. I still hadn’t gotten an apology so I did what I thought was right and gave them the middle finger back and they left.”
17. Teacher Liked To Scold Me, So I Made Her Look Like A Lunatic
“This all happened in the 90s when I was in middle school. I believe I was 11 years old. There was a teacher we’ll call Miss Weirdo from another class who I’ve seen before but never interacted much with her; I just knew who she was and that’s it.
One day during a family get-together, we realized Miss Weirdo was a distant relative.
Her sister is married to one of my grandma’s brothers. I was introduced to her and the family was talking about how she had to ‘take care of me’ when she sees me in school from now on. She just smiled and agreed.
From then on, I would see her everywhere! In the halls, near my classroom, during recess; it was really weird. She would just look at me and scold me if I was doing something she considered ‘bad’.
If I was playing with my friends she would tell me not to yell too much even though I was quiet or if I was walking to the bathroom she would make me go back to class saying I skipped class way too often even though I never did. She would stop me and compare how I was wearing my uniform to that of my friends.
It was so frustrating and I would tell my classroom teacher but she didn’t believe me and I don’t blame her; the situation was bizarre.
Fast forward a couple of months my teacher went on maternity leave and Miss Weirdo ended up being my substitute teacher. She would make me change seats constantly because I was ‘loud’, would ask me if I knew the answer to her questions every day, and kept telling me my uniform was sloppy.
We were kids, we were all sloppy!
One day, I had a sleepover with my best friend and I accidentally forgot my school shoes at her house. My mom sent me another pair and I knew this was going to cause a problem. I called my bestie and told her to bring my shoes with her to school.
When Miss Weirdo saw me with the incorrect shoes, she looked like it was Christmas for her.
Now that I look back on it, I think she never escalated her behavior up until this point because her ‘complaints’ didn’t match with my appearance; I was a tiny girl who looked way younger than I actually was, super quiet and I liked to hug everyone. If she told my parents or my other teachers that I was causing trouble, they would not believe her.
So now she had physical proof that I broke a rule by using shoes that weren’t part of the uniform. She yelled at me that I was in big trouble, she would make the principal come to the classroom and they would need to call my parents. (As if at that age my mom wouldn’t know how I dressed every day…)
I was super annoyed.
When she left the classroom, my friend and I acted at the same time. I took off my shoes, she opened her backpack, gave me the correct shoes, and hid the other ones. All in a couple of seconds and while all of our classmates were watching us.
When she came back with the principal, she just pointed at me and kept saying I was the one disregarding the rules and all that.
That they needed to call my mom because obviously, I was a rebellious child who did whatever she wanted. The principal just looked at her, at me looking all dramatically sad and scared, my perfectly acceptable shoes, and back at her. When the principal kept looking at her as if he was considering retiring her because of her old age, Miss Weirdo turned around and looked at my shoes, and oh boy, did she yell at me.
She yelled that I stop pretending to be a nice student, that I was trying to make her look bad and she just went and took my backpack and started looking for the other shoes inside. The student desks were like a ‘double box’ where you could store stuff under your seat and under the table and she also looked inside my desk. All the while, the principal asked a couple of my classmates what was going on and they just said Miss Weirdo always acted like that towards me.
They never said I changed my shoes; it was amazing.
The principal very gently took her outside and told us he would send another teacher for the day and left. She stopped being our substitute teacher after that.
That day I learned I have a super innocent-looking face and I could get away with anything. I’ve used this gift for the past 20 years.”
16. Won't Replace A Brand New Lawnmower But Will Let Me Return And Reorder? Sounds Good To Me
“So I bought a riding lawnmower a few years ago from a big home store.
I paid for delivery and upon said delivery, it didn’t start. The delivery truck had left by the time I had gotten gas in it and figured this out so I called the store.
I explained that my brand new just delivered today lawnmower was not starting and immediately the person on the phone asked me if I purchased the extended warranty. I hadn’t so they told me it would cost $100 to have them come get the lawnmower and then however much more the repairs were.
Mind you, this was brand freaking new. In my mind, they should bring me a new one to replace the one that didn’t work upon delivery. No matter how much I argued this worker was sticking to their story.
I quickly changed my tactic and asked what the return policy was. As long as a return was initiated within 30 days I could have a full refund including the cost of delivery, and the store would come pick up the mower for me at no additional cost.
So I pointed out that the store wouldn’t replace my non-working item by taking one trip to my house to pick up the non-working one and bring me one that worked and instead would make two trips to pick up the one that didn’t work and then bring me the new one I purchased the second time as a totally different transaction. The worker said yes, and when I tried to point out how that made no sense, he didn’t want to hear it.
So right then and there I initiated a refund. I then immediately ordered a new one and had him set up the delivery date. After that date was set, we had to schedule the date for pickup of the old mower, and I made myself unavailable for any date other than the delivery date for the new one. So even though he had insisted they wouldn’t just bring me a replacement mower and pick up the first one, they were now doing just that but with the additional paperwork of processing a return and additional paperwork for delivery of the new mower.
The manager called me later that day to apologize for the hassle and they ended up waiving my delivery fee.”
15. Trying To Scam Me? I'll Waste Your Time For Fun
“I started some freelance work through Upwork. So far it’s been pretty cool, but today was my first time dealing with a scammer. I knew it was a scammer right off the bat because I applied to two different job postings that were essentially the same job—but supposed to be for separate companies. These jobs were for QA testing mobile games.
I received two messages right after one another, and the messages were identical. That was already a red flag for me.
I changed up my responses between them, giving them the benefit of the doubt— maybe they think I’M the scammer. They both asked me if I was interested in the job, and told me they needed to ask me some questions before I continue. They asked me what kind of phone I use, and how long I’ve had my AppleID account. Then they requested screenshots of all of my downloaded apps in the last 90 days.
One of the accounts sent me pictures of how to do it, but I noticed the file name of the screenshots was in Chinese. This wouldn’t be an issue, except their profile said they were located in the USA and their job posting was found in the USA only section.
During this time, the account that sent me the file with a Chinese title was deleted for ‘breaking terms and conditions of Upwork’.
So it was safe to assume someone else caught on and reported the one profile. I decided to take this opportunity to gather as much evidence against the remaining profile and waste their time so they aren’t using their time to scam other people.
So I supply them with a cropped image of what they requested, then I would ask them questions like where are you located?
What is the name of the app I am testing? Will I be using TestFlight or another similar software for bug reporting? They kept trying to dodge my questions and tried to tell me ‘we are a normal company’ while pushing me to sign the contract sent by ANOTHER scam profile, supposedly the profile of their HR Rep.
The contract they sent me was super suspicious.
It was for a different amount and it wasn’t even close to the job posting I applied for. The title even sounded like a scam. ‘Recruitment for customer service, a job for baby mothers. Can be done at home.’ Now THIS made me mad. Now they are using this app specifically to target moms with babies? Gross. I tell him I don’t have a baby and ask him if I’m disqualified?
He said no of course not, anyone can do this!
I asked why the contract was so different, they said it doesn’t matter. I said it does, I want to make sure the contract is aligned with the work I’m doing. They said they’d fix it. So they changed the amount and sent another. But I obviously had problems with that one too.
Again, they tried to assure me it was fine and nothing mattered but the job description was still different. So I had them change that one and edit it and send a new one.
Now I’m picking apart their final contract, I’m playing stupid and asking more questions. Why do I need a home phone for this? I only have a cell phone?
What is the name of the app? Pretending like I’m just clueless and stupid. I can tell he’s getting frustrated because he keeps trying to get me to sign the contract but I keep saying I need more info. He asked if I needed a break, and I said no way! I am so excited to start. Just give me a little more info so I can make sure I can do this since I’m so new at it!
After asking multiple times, and him beating around the bush; he explains the job he wants me to perform. I am to use a ‘company gift card’ and make purchases with it on the app so they can ‘test their card and recharge function.’ Yeah right! I start asking him questions again like, will I be able to play the game? Do I get tokens?
He still never answered if I need to have a home phone or not! Do I receive a real physical card too? Will it come in the mail? Will he need my address? How do I test the card? He assures me I don’t need to do anything, just sign the contract and follow his directions. You’d think by now, if he was a real employer, he would not be wasting so much time trying to explain this to someone.
He obviously didn’t know how to play the part, because he kept coming off pushier and more incessant than before.
So I ask AGAIN what app am I downloading? And finally, after my 7th time of asking, he sends me a screenshot of an idle clicker game. This filename also happened to be in Chinese. Just like the first guy! I ask him why it’s in Chinese, and he says it’s for the international version…because he’s obviously an American living in America.
Can’t you tell by his obviously cliché white bread name he got out of a gashapon machine? I act really excited and impressed to be doing a worldwide international job! I tell him I’m going to go download the app (heck no I’m not).
After I ‘download it’, I pretended to be really impressed that he was working for a totally different company than he mentioned before.
He sends me the credit card info and then tells me to put the credit card info as my AppleID default for payments. I pretend I don’t know where that is, or how to find it, and he sends some more screenshots of an iPhone all in Chinese with red arrows on where to push. Again, I feign ignorance and pretend I can’t find where he wants me to put it because I don’t have ‘WeChat’ or any of the Chinese writing he had.
I pretend for a little while longer that I couldn’t find it, and wasted his time a little more. I tell him I finally put it in but it declined, he told me to try again and send a screenshot when I’m finished. So I get a picture of Tiananmen Square off Google, send that as my screenshot, and end our messages with ‘screw you scammer’ written in Chinese.
He acted confused and I told him I just wasted his time for fun, CCP sucks and he’s getting reported, then I blocked him and all the other profiles they used.
I took 5 hours of his time throughout the course of this interaction. I can only hope he’ll get in trouble for not making anything for those 5 hours he wasted for nothing. It definitely wasn’t a waste for me.
I took screenshots of our entire conversation and I added them as a post on my profile.”
14. Take Up My Time? We'll See About That
“A long time ago, when I was about 13 my parents lived in a big apartment block (at least for our country’s standards in the 80s). And every Summer it was the same, my parents went to work and I enjoyed the time I had for myself.
Back then, my very special friends – the Jehovah’s Witnesses – used to go from door to door to ‘talk to you about God’. Unlike when you see them standing in the street, they would never shut up and take an enormous amount of your time, basically trying to brainwash you in about half an hour. My parents warned me about them ahead of time and told me not to open the door when they came knocking.
God alone knows, how they got into the building.
So, during summer break my usual routine as a bit of an introvert teen was to get up late, have breakfast, and then switch on my computer.
Now imagine how helpful to my agenda a knock on the door and the words ‘Excuse me? Do you want to talk about God?’ was.
When it happens once, no biggie.
Just be quiet and wait for them to go away. But when it happens every freaking day, it starts to tick you off.
One day, I decided to dodge the issue altogether and try to get out for a change. Why not get some fresh air? Being the smart kid I was, I decided to use the stairs, because I was dead sure that my special friends would use the elevator to make their rounds.
Oh, how wrong I was.
Just as I entered the stairwell, along came two guys in their 30s, looking exactly like I imagined them. Horn rimmed glasses, short-sleeved shirts with ties. Classy.
‘Here we go,’ I thought. Trying to avoid any interaction, I wanted to avoid eye contact and squeeze myself past them. Well, I tried.
‘Hello, young man! Do you have a minute to talk about God?’
‘No, sorry. I’m in a bit of a hurry, excuse me…’
As I tried to get past, one of them made a big mistake. Saying ‘Hey wait!’ he grabbed my wrist.
Yes, I was an introverted teen – but not only. A – I was ticked off. Really ticked off. No one messes with my happy time. B – I have been a martial artist since I could walk.
Won the regional tournament the year before.
Reacting before I could think, I twisted his hand to his back and added a kick to the back of the knee for good measure. Let’s just say, it did the job it was supposed to do. Far be it from me to say that I felt the sweet joy of payback at that moment – that would be unethical. But the grin on my face spoke volumes.
As an added bonus – for some reason, they seemed to lose interest in my building soon after.
Turned out to be a great Summer!”
13. Only Want Men To Make Your Meal? Fine By Me
“I worked as a cook and carry-out for an Italian restaurant for several years. Normally I would work in the kitchen during the week and carry-out on the weekends. My forte was cooking. I was fast, detail-oriented, and prided myself on making the perfect dish. In the 5+ years I worked there I was the only female ever in the kitchen.
On Tuesdays, I was always in the kitchen and another worker, Eric, worked carry-out.
Every Tuesday a customer would come in and order the same thing. The order was very specific and went against how meals are typically prepared. Things like they only wanted two meatballs instead of the standard three, the meatballs must be separate from the spaghetti in an aluminum dish NOT a Styrofoam cup, a small scoop of sauce on the meatballs, etc. The meal was so specific I knew it by heart and always made it.
The cheapskate owner of the restaurant would have been annoyed if he knew how much Styrofoam and aluminum tins I had to use to make the order by splitting all the food out, but I didn’t mind.
Well, one day Eric decided to switch to serving in the main dining room to make more money. The first Tuesday he switched, the managers didn’t have anyone for carry-out so they asked me to cover.
As I was working that night in carry-out an old man in a black bowler hat and tan trench coat comes into the lobby. I greet him and am about to take his order when he states, ‘Are there any men working today? Where’s Eric?’
I was confused but went and fetched Eric and Eric took his order. I asked Eric if he was related and he said, ‘No, he just feels women are incompetent and can’t make his order right.’ I was fuming.
When the order was ready I picked it up and realized it was the specific order that comes in every Tuesday. This old man must have assumed only men work in the kitchen. Little did he know he had just come face-to-face with the five-foot, 100-pound female that had perfectly made his order every Tuesday for years. I handed him his order without a word.
I was so angry at his misogynism that I didn’t want to speak and say something that would make me lose my job. I regret not saying anything to this day. He inspected his order and rolled his eyes when he spied the meatballs in Styrofoam instead of an aluminum dish but left without a word.
After that, I decided if he wanted men to handle his stupid order then I’ll go with it.
I got approval from the manager to proceed with my plan and male coworkers jumped in to help. I asked Eric to not help him anymore since he was familiar with the old man’s order. Besides, he needed to focus on serving anyways. Only other men took his order. I asked the male cooks to make his meal. I didn’t tell the special instructions.
No more special treatment with separate tins. He got the standard spaghetti and meatballs like everyone else. It would be what the male cheapskate owner would want, after all. And no special discount codes that would credit him 50 cents for one less meatball. Only Eric and I knew the discount codes during that shift anyways.
Well, every week his order was, according to him, wrong.
He started to demand the order be remade per his requirements. He would be denied his requests, citing the cheapskate owner was cracking down on product waste. He got even more upset when he discovered he wasn’t getting the discount codes anymore.
After several Tuesdays of this charade, he finally asked to speak to a manager to voice his dissatisfaction. He asked, ‘Where is the MAN that was making my meal?’
And the manager responded, ‘Oh, SHE quit.’
Looking back I should have instead popped up around the corner and said something like ‘I am no man’ a la Lord of the Rings or something. But that was the best response we thought of at the time.
Unfortunately, he didn’t have an epiphany or realization that I hoping for. The manager just said he scoffed and took his food and left.
He quit coming a couple of weeks later. Never heard from him again. Should have been more respectful to the female cook.”
12. My Ex Tried To Manipulate Me, So I Manipulated Him Right Back
“This happened years ago when I was around 19 or so. My ex-partner was 22 and we’d been seeing each other for almost 3 years. In the end, I ended up seeing texts on his phone where he’d been messaging one of his female best friends, telling her that he thought she was beautiful and hot and complimenting her bikini photos online, flirting with her, etc. Stuff like that.
Now I’d met this girl before and she was nice and didn’t flirt back with my ex at all. I saw the text messages and she sounded uncomfortable with what he was saying to her.
Now a little background info: my ex was a super spoiled trust fund baby. And when I say spoiled, I mean spoiled. He lived in his parent’s basement and his mother did everything for him, like his laundry, cleaning his room, cooking all of his meals for him, etc. The man didn’t even know how to boil water.
His dad was big into the stock market so my ex just lived off of the money he got from his parents and had a lot of it.
Anyway, fast forward to after I find out he’s messaging that girl all of that stuff. I was ticked off, but since we were out shopping with his mother, I didn’t want to bring it up in public, especially in front of her.
But since I was in such a bad mood, he picked up on it and kept asking me what was wrong, and I said I didn’t want to tell him until we were in private. But he wouldn’t let it go.
So I was finally like fine. When his mom went to go get the car, I told him that I found out he’d been flirting with the girl behind my back, and oh boy.
The guy had a complete meltdown. I’m talking crouching on the ground in front of the store with his arms over his head, rocking back and forth and making weird noises––just absolutely losing it. Which was really weird and concerning because I’d never seen him act that way. And selfish because he was the one who’d hurt me and yet he was acting like the victim.
We didn’t get to talk about it there and then because his mom got back with the car. She saw her son freaking out and kept asking what was wrong but neither of us told her. (It was none of her business.) When we got back to his house, I told him that I wanted him to drive me back to my car immediately. (We lived a few hours away from each other, so we would both drive halfway and one person would ride back to the other’s house.) He didn’t try to give excuses or anything, just said that it wasn’t ‘like that.’
Uh-huh, sure Jan.
Now we’re in the car driving back, I bring up the subject asking him why he texted her all of those things, and this man begins freaking out again. He starts making these frustrated grunts and hitting himself in the head repeatedly. And let me reiterate that he was the one driving the car. Not only that, but he kept threatening to hurt himself.
I was low-key panicking for my life right now. I didn’t know if he was going to swerve us into oncoming traffic or what. So I told him calmly, ‘I’m not going to break up with you, just relax and forget about it.’
Well, I’m a filthy liar who lies and didn’t want to end up smeared across the highway. No regrets there.
He calmed down and I kept on pretending like I wasn’t upset at all.
We got back to my car and I said my goodbyes like nothing even happened, and never brought it up again. But once I got home and the threat of imminent death was over, I started to plan. Not just because of the fact that he was flirting with that girl behind my back, but also because he made me legitimately fear for my life.
Some spouses and partners will threaten to harm themselves in order to manipulate the other partner into staying in the relationship due to fear. If someone ever does that to you, you are not responsible for what that other person does. It is not on you.
I’m not someone who can be manipulated easily and that jerk had put me through emotional distress.
Now a little more background info: I had been recently accepted to a very difficult-to-get-into, kind of famous college internship in my country.
However, after getting accepted, you only have a few weeks to pay them a fee of $600 as a rent down payment since they provide you with housing when you move there. I didn’t have all of the money and planned on asking my mom for a small $300 loan so I could pay the rest of the fee.
I had never ever asked my ex for money.
Not only because I hate asking people for money period, but I didn’t want to bring that kind of power dynamic into our relationship. My ex knew that I didn’t come from money. In fact, the first time he came over to my house, he later made a comment about how small it was.
Based on everything he’d done, I decided to be Pretty Petty™.
About a week after that incident with the text messages happened, I asked him to hang out. He agreed, thinking that everything was fine between us. I ended up bringing my internship up and lamented about how I didn’t have enough to pay the $600, that I was really upset about it since I’d been aiming for that internship for a long time and it was difficult to get into, blah blah sob story blah.
I never asked him for money. He offered.
You know what they say, the best way to get someone to do what you want is to make them think that it was their idea in the first place.
I already had half of the payment, but I didn’t tell him that. Instead, I accepted the full payment and we went to the bank (we walked over from the place we met up from.
No way was I getting into Crashy McGee’s car again). He withdrew the whole $600 in cash. Later, after I left and went home, I dumped his behind over text, blocked him, never spoke to him again, and ended up $300 richer.”
11. Make Me Forfeit? I'll Give You A Taste Of Your Own Medicine
“10 years ago, I was really obsessed with a card game called Biriba. There was an online website where you could play it. Each player had a ranking, that would go up or down according to your wins or losses.
If you chose to forfeit a game, you would lose points. The only way not to lose any points while playing the game was to either win or have the other player forfeit.
A Biriba game usually lasts around 40-45 minutes. Before you start a game, you open a table, set the table preferences, and wait for the opponent to join. One of the preferences is how much time each player gets every turn they make.
Each player gets a specific amount of time, that resets every time the player takes a turn. The typical time most players choose is 1 minute. And they rarely use the whole minute. They usually play within seconds. You choose the table preferences you want and wait for the other player to join and accept them.
A lot of the opponents try to win by deception.
Meaning they set the time for each player at a maximum of 5 minutes. Then they take the WHOLE 5 minutes each turn they make. They only take their turn right before their 5-minute limit runs out. Most of their opponents get frustrated, tired, and eventually forfeit.
There’s a second way of winning by deception at this game. I will try explaining it without boring you. In order to play this game, you have to create matching sets of at least three cards of the same group, for example, 4-5-6 of clubs, or 3-4-6-7 of hearts, etc. You start with 11 cards.
The more (or bigger) sets you make, the more points you gather. So in order to win, you have to eventually get more cards. Each turn you take you can either (a) draw one (1) card from the deck (b) or take all the cards from the discard pile. Then you discard (1) card. The game rule clearly states that in order to take the discard pile, you have to use one of the cards in the discard pile to create/compliment one of your sets, and then put down your set in order to prove that you did, in fact, use a card from the discard pile.
The discard pile is one of the most wanted things in the game because you gather a lot of cards at once and take better chances at gathering points.
Not a lot of websites gave you the option to play Biriba. Around that time I only knew one website, that had a flaw that was extremely harassed by sly players (the second deception method). This flaw did NOT require the player to justify taking the discard pile.
You could just take it without putting down any set, or justify your move in any way. So a lot of players at every one of their turns simply took the discard pile and discarded 1 card (usually the EXACT SAME card at every turn) so they wouldn’t let their opponent gather cards. The opponent was forced to draw every turn, and give up valuable cards since they couldn’t gather more than 11 cards.
The sly opponent every turn took the discard pile that had 2 cards and left only 1 card in the discard pile. Their opponent would draw a card, and discard 1 thus making the discard pile 2 cards. So at each turn, the sly opponent would gain 1 more card while their opponent would gather none.
This resulted in the sly opponent eventually gathering enough cards to win, while their opponent kept the original number of 11 cards that hardly allowed them to create a set or two.
If you were aggressive enough, you could also start playing the second deception method against them. Taking that 1 single card from the discard pile and giving 1 back, etc. But this simply could go on forever, with the game NEVER ending, and most players didn’t have the patience or the stomach for that. Except me.
So one day, around 8 p.m., I create a table for Biriba.
I set my options like always, 1 minute for each player. An opponent enters, so I click start. He clicks as well. After the game started, to my horror I see that he changed the time setting to 5 minutes. Immediately I knew what that meant. That he intended to use the first deception method, in order to make me forfeit. Man, I can’t even describe how much I hated those guys.
They took forever, busted my nerves, and made the game not enjoyable at all. That night I was at my wit’s end with them.
I give him the benefit of the doubt and start playing. And wouldn’t you know it? He took the whole 5 minutes to complete his turn. Not only that, but he actually used the second deception method as well. The scumbag of scumbags.
I took a few turns normally, just a few seconds each turn, while he used the whole 5 minutes. 20 minutes have passed, normally we would’ve been halfway through but the game was just starting. I send a couple of messages on the chat, asking to go faster. He completely ignored me. All the while he chose to take all the cards from the discard pile as well at each turn (second deception method).
Well, that was it. I have had it. Two can play this game. I opened a movie on my pc, set a 4:45 minute timer for each turn I took, and then started taking the discard pile at each turn as well, while I used my whole 5-minute time limit at each turn. I only played 5-6 seconds before my time ran out. So at each turn, the discard pile only had 1 card, and we kept doing that without allowing the other one to gather any cards at all.
We each remained with very few cards for hours. And both of us took 5 minutes to complete our turn. As I said, a typical Biriba game takes around 40-45 minutes. In our case, hours have passed and we were at the same spot we began. At first, I thought he would get tired easily. Admittedly he was tougher than I thought. I watched 2 movies and he was still going strong.
The audacity of this guy. I was tired and sleepy, but so determined to not let him have his way. So I put a third movie in. I was a college student with all the time in the world.
Around 1:40 a.m., he started getting tired. Instead of using the whole 5 minutes, he started playing a little faster, he maybe used 3-3:30 minutes. It was obvious he was folding.
I was very pleased with this but still kept playing at the same pace. Around 2 a.m., (6 hours after we started our game) he dropped both his deception methods and started playing normally. Each one of his turns was only seconds. He was clearly tired and wanted out. Ah, oh no you jerk. You are not getting off this easily. I’m so mad and tired because you made me sit all night doing the exact same move at each turn, I will make you regret it.
So I kept playing using both deception methods. I used my timer normally and watched my third movie like I watched the other two. He sat there and endured all of it. The game kept going for another 2 hours. The game ended after 8 hours, at exactly 4 a.m., while he was tired, couldn’t wait to get out, and played as fast as possible while sending a few messages to speed it up (which I completely ignored).
What was the best part, you ask? That I also won.”
10. Don't Appreciate Me Working Overtime? Sorry, What Year Is It?
“One of the many data tables that I dealt with was refreshed on a weekly basis. Then when the year ended, we’d freeze the data. That meant we would stop refreshing the data, rename the table from ‘data_table’ to ‘data_table_2010’ (insert the proper year), and create a new empty ‘data_table’ for the current year.
This is because very often, the number of columns would change from year to year, and even the logic would change. So something that was being calculated one way would be calculated differently using the new columns that had been added. There weren’t new columns every year, but the logic always changed.
Along comes yet another know it all, Harry. Harry is the stereotypical boss who knows little but is only too happy to take credit.
I had been working on the updates for the new year. These updates would usually take around two months since they would come in, be worked on, and it’d be an iterative process. We’d go back and forth on ambiguities, issues with bad data, exceptional cases, and other assorted problems. So for two months, the code was in flux and everyone knew there may be incorrect values because of this.
Harry was having none of this. He wanted everything done tomorrow. Naturally, he was bugging me to get the updates done quickly. None of this two-month nonsense, even though it worked and was a proven system over many years. I ended up working overtime and delivered it in about a month. What did I get for my labor? One lousy thank you email which wasn’t even copied to any of the seniors.
So my work wasn’t even openly acknowledged. And as an added bonus, Harry would be presenting this on a call to people in charge. You can probably guess where this is going.
Day of the call, Harry pings me and reminds me to have everything ready. Of course, I created this setup. I know it inside out. We get on the call, and Harry is going on and on about how great this table is, blah blah blah.
I am inwardly laughing because, to be honest, the yearly updates weren’t that big this time, and even then, it is still an improvement from something we’ve had for a while. It’s not something completely new, but clearly, Harry has decided this will be his big thing. After all this blabber, he goes to run the report, and what would you know, it is showing last year’s information.
All the numbers are off because of that. Rather flustered, he tries to brush it off claiming the report needs to be updated with the latest data, and asks me to run the refresh process. I run it, and he tries again. No change. Yes, I had made it point to the frozen data of the previous year on the backend.
After half a dozen tries with nothing changing, Harry gives up, admits defeat, and closes the call.
Needless to say, this blew up in his face and he was reassigned elsewhere. There were a bunch of frantic emails over how to fix this ‘urgent problem’. I let everyone stew over it for a week, before going in and undoing my changes which took about five mins. I still didn’t get as much credit as I felt I deserved for delivering the updates early, but I at least got this monkey off my back and that was enough.”
9. HOA Rules Need To Be Followed? Yeah, Sure
“The setup: Our tale begins in my teen years about 10-11 years ago. It was summer and my parents wanted to go on vacation. Me being a 16-year-old dummy with both a gaming addiction and seeing my cue to living the free independent unsupervised life, much like a house cat with an open-door-for-two-week-opportunity, offered to house and dog-sit while they and my sister went on vacation.
Some important background information is probably needed here, since some dummies here might call my parents neglectful for leaving a 16 year old unsupervised for two weeks: I’m from a safer and more secure place than the US, we lived in the suburb and I was taught most life skills by the time I was 12.
Week one: While gaming took 90% of my time away and I developed the day and night schedule of a backend developer, I still did all the chores around the house with a few exceptions since I deemed they could wait.
I check the mailbox and there is a handwritten letter with runes of the ancient.
Using my old doctor’s notes as a Rosetta stone, I deciphered that it was from the president of our equivalent of an HOA. Imagine an HOA with a fifth of the power the typical HOA in the US would have. A Hawkeye of the HOA Avengers, if it was in a sport it would only receive participation awards, you get the point.
The Moria written tomb said that the grass of my front lawn was too tall according to regulations. I went out and took a look at the grass, which was maybe 1 cm too tall (that’s the equivalent of a jellybean to my freedom measurement folks). The same day I cut the grass cause might as well do so to keep the peace.
The day after, a new letter written by the same Shakespeare wannabe came.
I grabbed my Indiana Jones Hat and performed a heathen ritual in the shed to read the message. The roses in my front yard were going too far out through the fence by 15 cm. I once again comply.
On the third day of crap-mas, the true cause of annoyance said to me: my backyard’s bushes were too tall. Here is where I finally get irritated, since you have to enter my parents’ property to check the bushes’ height.
With Satan’s three commandments in hand, I go and visit my direct neighbor, who I knew was on the HOA board. I ask her about the letters and she looks through them and laughs. Those are from the banshee of Arrakis aka the megakaren who lived 10 houses further down the street. She had been kicked out of the HOA board after she poisoned 3 dogs in the neighborhoods with rat poison-laced treats.
Not wanting to deal with her after she threw rocks at me when I was trick or treating as a child, I decided to let the case rest and leave my bushes untrimmed.
Fast forward a week into my parents’ vacation. As any teenager would I started to plan a party, and like the good kid I was, I went around to all my nearby neighbors and warned them about the potential noise, that parties tend to create.
At some point here, I remembered the saying ‘witches be fading, but a good counterstrike match lasts forever.’
Instead of holding a straight-up party, I decided to invite friends over to a LAN-party, so we could play counterstrike source, and quickly replace the white b***d cells in our body with whatever was in the knockoff energy drinks. Fast forward to said lan-party: my parents’ dining room smells like teenage farts, ax body spray, sweat, and all chips in the world mixed together.
Typical lan stuff. 1 am there is a loud knock on the door. I go out, to see two cops looking at me with a surprised Pikachu face. I look at them with the same amount of confusion.
Cop 1: ‘We have a report that there is a loud party going on, and there might be several minors doing illegal substances here.’
Me: ‘Do energy drinks count as illegal substances?’
Cop 2: ‘No?’
Me: ‘Then I have no idea what you are talking about.’
Cop 1: ‘We had a frantic woman calling constantly, which is why we came, but it seems we are more of a disturbance than you guys are.’
At the same time one of my friends can be heard in the background:
‘OP get in here!! The bomb has been planted and you are the only one alive.’
Cop 1: ‘Counterstrike?’
Me: ‘Counterstrike..’
‘We will leave you to it then.’
The cops left and we lost the match. Unrelated though.
Two days after, I get another knock on my door. There she is, the bane of all good, she who must not be mentioned without carrying Miraak’s Sword and a towel on you. She starts screaming that my illegal substance party kept her up all night and that I’m a horrible brat who needs to tend to my bushes if my parents don’t want to lose the house.
At this point, I stop her and remind her that: 1. The HOA doesn’t have the power to do that. They hardly have the power to do anything except approve house owners’ requests. 2. That she was kicked out of the HOA due to the poisoning incident. 3. That I didn’t even have a party 4. That she needs to stay the heck away from my backyard.
She got even madder and started screaming that she would have me and my parents arrested and that the poisoned treats were meant for my dog as well.
I slammed the door on her. She had royally ticked me off. No one threatens my good boy. No one.
I had about 4 days before my parents returned, so I made them count. I called the police and visited my real HOA neighbor and got all the necessary approvals. Then I went over and talked with the neighbors surrounding her house. I would do all the yard work, which involved loud equipment around her house.
Legally, we were allowed to make noise from 8 am till 8 pm with yard work, but it’s considered rude to do it after 5 pm. That didn’t stop me though. I just kept sending leaves and grass flying, as if all the bushes, trees, and odd plants had peed in my grandfather’s ashes. She came out and screamed at me, even threw a rock at me, it brought back old memories but I didn’t care.
I was gonna make as much legal sound as possible. Whenever she complained I just told her, that their plants weren’t up to HOA standards.
Friday rolls around. It’s 8 am. My friends and I are gathered in front of her house. We have all the tools ready. It’s time to make her pay. We turn on the speaker and the BBQ and crack up a beer.
Speaker is set to the exact legal limit of how loud the music is allowed to be. Most of her neighbors come out and join during the day since I had invited them while killing their plants. She screamed constantly for an hour, and called the cops twice, which left after seeing my permits from themselves and the HOA. That’s right witch. If you want a party to complain about, then you shall get the finest party of the shire just outside of your house.
We kept it up to the exact time limit.”
8. Cameras Have To Be On No Matter What? That's Perfectly Fine
“I am a project manager and data scientist. I manage lots of different public health-related projects. There is one project in particular that includes a really demanding team from a federal government department.
I recently returned back to work from maternity leave. I work in my office three days a week; on those days, I have to pump breastmilk at regular intervals for my baby.
Luckily, I have my own private office and can usually just keep on working (emails, reports, etc.) while I pump. I have a hands-free, wearable pump which is convenient….but still definitely obvious if I am wearing it (it pokes out about my shirt and is not exactly silent).
Recently we have a Zoom call scheduled during one of the times I needed to pump.
Instead of missing the meeting, I figured I would just keep my camera off so I could wear my pump and still participate and listen. Heck, I was even IN my office and not working from home; I felt like I was being a pretty committed employee!
The meeting starts and a few people have their cameras off. The Lead makes the announcement: ‘I just want to remind everyone that our expectation is that you will have your cameras on because this is not an online meeting, it is a simulated in-person meeting’ (…whatever that means).
I sent a quick private message to explain I was paying attention but pumping; no response to me, just instead, a, ‘Again, the expectation is that all cameras will be on.’
So fine. I turn my camera on for this meeting of about 20 people, The camera isn’t aimed at my chest but certainly, the top of my pump is CLEARLY visible. I unmuted myself, so you could also clearly HEAR the pump, and just said, ‘Thank you for your patience, I was adjusting my breast pump.’
The meeting continued awkwardly, with several other team managers letting me know privately it was fine to turn my camera off, but at that point, there really was no point in turning it off.
At the most recent meeting, the announcement was, ‘Please turn on your cameras if you are comfortable doing so.'”
7. Want To Be An Annoying Jerk? I'll Get You Kicked Out Of The Nightclub
“I work at a nightclub part-time as floor staff. (My job is to collect empty cups and generally clear up after all the messy intoxicated people.) This particular night my mood was slowly going down.
Mostly because I had to clean up vomit three times before the incident (six times total by the end of the night.)
I’m walking through the dance floor with a half-full basket of cups, doing my usual route for the hundredth time when I feel a tug on my hair. (My hair is about shoulder length, not too long but quite long for a guy.) I whip around and see a guy laughing.
I instantly say ‘Don’t’ as sternly as I can. He just goes ‘Ooo’ like a child who is in trouble but doesn’t care and just continues laughing. I instantly turn around and grab security, luckily there was one posted just a few feet away from where this happened. I point to the guy and say ‘Him, kick him out.’ The bouncer then starts escorting him through the dance floor and out into the alleyway.
(The alleyway leads to the entrance/exit)
I start to go back to my job but I just can’t. I drop off the basket and head to the staff smoking area to try to calm down. I take deep breaths and then sit down for a minute with my head in my hands. After a couple of minutes, I think I’ve calmed down enough to go back.
On the way back I see the guy with his friend talking to the bouncer that escorted him off the dance floor and pass them on my way to grab something (opposite their direction.) I then run into my manager who then asks me what happened with the guy outside. I tell him just kick the guy out, he says he wants to know what happened first. I tell him a quick version of what happened in a rather ticked-off tone and start to go back to my job.
At this point, I am really ticked off again and having trouble getting back to a level of calm I work with.
I have to pass the guy and he actually apologizes saying he was just messing around and reaches his hand out for me to shake it. I take a deep breath and a second to think. I think I should say; ‘Any other day I would let it go, but today I was already in a terrible mood.’ Then tell the bouncer to just kick him out and move on.
But instead, I shake his hand and say, ‘It’s alright,’ and go back to work. Still seething and now in the worst mood I’ve been in, in a long time.
I catch up with a friend from my secondary school and tell him what happened. He is sympathetic and tells me to go take more time to calm down. I still work but I’m feeling a little better.
Thinking because he apologized he is probably back on the dance floor, barely learning his intoxicated lesson.
While on my route I pass the bouncer that escorted him again and ask him how it went. He says after he got the guy to apologize they kicked him out. I have the biggest grin on my face and later my manager notices. He says after I told him what happened he got the head bouncer and told him to kick him out.
The head bouncer just told them ‘you don’t touch staff’ and told them to leave. ‘Them’ because the guy that did it and his friend both got kicked out.
I felt a little bad for the friend because he didn’t do anything. But also he didn’t do anything. He could have stopped or at least chastised his friend for what he did but he didn’t say anything to him or me when it happened. He wasn’t banned but my mood went from awful to satisfied really quick.”
6. Stole My Keyboard? You'll Regret That
“Many years ago I was working at the office and noticed over time that my co-worker would begin to switch my things out with his.
It started with the chair (his would squeak), then items would be rearranged on my desk as a joke, and finally, it was the keyboard. He would always complain that a few of his keys would stick, and he was always one of those people who had to look at the keyboard in order to type. So one day, I got fed up after noticing my keyboard was having the same problem.
I bought a new, nice keyboard. Different from his so the swap would be obvious if he tried again. I took my old keyboard (which was on his desk), swapped two of the keys: N and M. Then I bought a remote-controlled outlet and plugged one of his monitors into it, and waited eagerly for him to arrive the next morning.
He arrives, and it’s business as usual. Opens up emails and starts typing away.
Then, slowly, I noticed the mumbling. He starts loudly tapping the keyboard and complaining that the stupid thing is broken. I look over at him and give him a shrug.
Soon after, around 10 am or so, I started with the monitor. I would randomly trigger the power via remote off and on. He starts getting more irate, slapping the side of it so I let it go for the day.
I switch his keys back that evening but leave the remote outlet as this bothers him the most.
For the next 2 weeks, I randomly trigger it on and off at different times throughout the day. After day 2, I notice he has swapped his monitor with mine and plugged it back into the same outlet. I smile to myself and continue onward. By day 3 he says he is going to get IT involved, so I gave them a ring and explained everything to them and they laugh and say ok.
On day 4 IT comes and brings him a ‘new’ monitor. They plug it in, run some ‘tests’, say it’s OK and give me a sly smile and move on. I wait another couple of days and start it over again.
After some time of listening to him whine and complain, I decide it’s enough because he’s starting to put IT through some trouble. They were good sports about it over the entire exchange and I removed the remote and he was never the wiser.”
Another User Comments:
“Ha, I love these kinds of things. Had a coworker that would come in on delivery day only to do the receives. It took her 3 hours to do a 20-minute job, she was the office witch, None of us liked her. She hated me particularly and made no secret of it because I was faster and made far fewer errors, she was scared I’d take her job from her.
Brought my wireless mouse in one day and plugged the dongle in. Every few min I’d pull it out and discreetly wiggle it on my leg. It always stopped just before anyone else could see it, she was going insane yelling the mouse was bugging out. Finally, the boss caught it and went to investigate. As they were looking at it he looked at me and I held up my mouse.
He just went ‘whelp looks like you’re gonna just have to work through it, nothing I can do.’ He came up to me and told me ‘that’s the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.'” UrbanLegendd
5. Get Mad Over Mere Pennies? Just A Second
“Several years ago, I used to volunteer part-time at a pretty well-known British charity shop. This happened soon after the UK government legislation where shops had to start charging for single-use plastic bags, like 5p at the time. The idea was to try and cut down on plastic. Most customers were either fine with paying or even started bringing their own bags, but there was this one guy that decided to make things difficult.
So this guy comes into the shop to browse around for a bit before coming to the till with some form of clothing (can’t remember what). I’m scanning his item and he asks for a bag. I tell the guy we have to charge for bags now and that it’s 5p per bag, something I make sure to tell every customer. The conversation between me and the guy isn’t word for word but is more or less how it went.
Me: ‘It’s 5p for a bag, is that okay?’
Guy: ‘Oh, no need. I’ll just use one of these.’
Now, one other thing the charity shop offers is donation bags, little packets that contain a large bag. Basically, if anyone wanted to donate items to the shop, we would give them a few of these packets and they could either bring back the filled bags themselves or arrange with the shop for the items to be picked up.
After refusing the bag, the guy reaches for a donation bag.
Me: ‘Oh, those are for donations only-‘
The guy interrupts me, wearing this crap-eating grin as he opens the packet.
Guy: ‘But why should I have to pay for a bag when these ones are free?’
Me: ‘It’s company policy. You have to pay for plastic bags now.’
Guy: ‘But these ones are free.’
The whole situation was starting to tick me off now and I had already dealt with some other crappy customers earlier that day. So I stop caring at this moment and just let him use the donation bag. On the till’s computer screen we had a ‘add bag’ button installed that’ll add 5p to the total bill. Maintaining eye contact, I reached over, said ‘One sec,’ then tapped the button and charged him the extra 5p.
The guy either didn’t care or probably didn’t even notice but at the time, that was the pettiest thing I remember doing. Such a small thing but it made my crappy shift much better.”
Another User Comments:
“I think you did exactly the right thing. There are way too many people who think they can game the system and who actually get away with it!
You made certain that this guy wasn’t going to be able to get away with it.
This goes along with a lot of mindsets these days where so many people think the world owes them things, even when they don’t work or pay for them. In the US, I honestly believe this problem escalated the most when they started the ‘Everyone gets a trophy’ trend in schools and events that kids are in.
I firmly believe that this is one of the reasons why a lot of younger people think they deserve things they don’t earn.” spagtscully
"Here ya go! A nice, shiny reminder of your failure!" L**o I threw those in the trash every time
4. Putting Up Dumb Signs Around The Park? They'll Get Replaced With A Twist
“We have a lovely park right beside our house. It is split right in the middle, one part is for dogs off-leash and the other has tons of children’s playgrounds and dogs are required to be leashed.
With spring here I noticed once signs all over the ‘on leash part’ of the park, warning people not to walk their dogs around. The next day they are gone, next week they are back. This happens several times and I am starting to think I am tripping.
Last night I walked my dog around 1 a.m (scary dog privilege) and saw two guys laughing and climbing the post the signs are put on.
They started taking them down. They saw me looking and hollered ‘no worries ma’am, these are not put up by the city but by a Karen, we’ll fix it.’
Alright, what the heck bye it’s a freaking sign, even if he is lying I am not calling the police. On my way out I see new signs everywhere. ‘No kids off leash’ with a little stick figure being walked by a big stick figure.
Another sign along the lines of ‘clean after your kids’ with a small stick figure pooping.
I laughed and walked away. The next day I saw the moms were not impressed. They had called the cops and wanted the signs down. They admitted to putting signs up banning dog walking in front of the cops as well. The kicker?
They got fined and the cops said someone will come take the new signs down up to 90 days.
I can’t stop laughing. A few dads tried but the guys glued them with industrial glue.”
Another User Comments:
“I have a friend who enjoys walking his dog on the trails in a park near his home. He’s had issues with others bringing their aggressive dogs off-leash on the trails and a few times his dog was attacked. He mounted a very official-looking sign at the main entrance to the trail and his issues dropped considerably.
The sign has been there for 4 years now.” Iwonatoasteroven
3. Complain About How I Book A Dentist Appointment? You'll Get Trolled
“So, I am a 20-year-old Autistic woman and I live with my mother. The reason why I live with my mother is because she doesn’t trust me out in the wild (Which, the town I live in isn’t really bad.
The worse that could happen to me is that I get spooked by a cat or a snake.)
Here are some details you should know about me and my mother. So, I made my first dentist appointment last year, around April or May. When I made my first dentist appointment, my mother was livid, even though she kept telling me to make my own appointment (yeah, real big brain there, Mom.) We also don’t have a steady relationship.
One moment, we are fighting over something stupid and the next moment we’re laughing over a silly sound. Lastly, I love to pull very harmless pranks, especially with my mother’s phone. My family doesn’t put passwords on our phones. Lastly, I have no pain tolerance. For example, if I stub my toe on the desk, it will hurt for an hour and I will complain about it for an hour until A.
my attention is diverted, or B. the pain subsides.
Okay, onto the petty revenge.
So, yesterday, I was having some slight discomfort due to a growing wisdom tooth, which was bothering me all day. I kept telling my mom that I need to schedule an appointment, which was mainly to remind myself.
So today, I woke up and the first thing I do is call the dentist. While I was scheduling my appointment, my mother kept interjecting, which was fine… until the receptionist asked ‘Have you felt any pain?’
My mother replies with ‘No,’ to which I ignored her and said ‘Slight, but not much.’
That ticked her off.
After I hung up, she started yelling at me saying ‘You shouldn’t have said that. They now think it’s an emergency and you can’t do this extraction today because you have to work.’ Blah blah blah (My mother and I work at the same place.
I work in the evenings while she works all day.)
She then storms out of the room and I discover she left her phone on the bed. So I schemed up my plan. You see, dear reader, last night, my mother asked me to add some songs from her MP3 player onto her phone’s SD card, which I did. BUT! I also added two of my favorite songs; An Experiment by Cheshyre, and Splitmek by Mmodule.
I changed the file names to look like two of the songs from my mom’s favorite band and she didn’t notice it. So, I got onto her phone and swiftly changed my ringtone from a song from Megaman X5 to An Experiment.
Just recently, I called her and this is how our conversation went.
Me: ‘Sooooo. do you like your new ringtone? (Evil giggle).’
Mom: ‘I didn’t even notice… it was like… growly. I figured you changed it.’
Me: ‘Daaaaang it!’
Funny thing was, she didn’t realize it was revenge for this morning…”
2. Make You Another Drink? Certainly
“I cannot begin to tell you just how crazy this week has been so far in your local drive-thru of Great Southwestern America. This lady is one of my (least) favorites.
Typical driver. Typical order … a couple of combo meals with medium drinks…no ice.
Our no ice button is a hot button issue, so I just make my no ice drinks for them filled nearly to the brim. Nearly.
She comes up with her glorious vehicle, and as soon as she receives the drinks she makes a frump that made her once-palatable face look worse than mine, clamoring:
‘These are too full, it’s getting all over my car!’
Before I can tell her I can dump some out, she squeezes the cup to demonstrate how overflowing it is, all the while having the guts to play it off like she isn’t trying some ham-handed look-at-my-muscle-but-pay-no-mind-to-my-right-hand-pushing-the-bicep bull crap. She turns it, magician style, a horribly campy display. I’d love it in any other situation but this. She’s really spraying soda everywhere.
I tell her gently, ‘Ma’am you’re holding the cup a little tightly’ and ‘Sam’, my buddy (drive-thru counterpart) pipes in with ‘She was straight squeezing the heck out of it!’
She goes ‘Oh My God, whatever, make me another drink!’
Enter malicious compliance.
She has already paid for her meal, including the two drinks she managed to squirt everywhere.
I make her another one, but hold it hostage.
I have a certain set of skills, you know.
‘That’ll be 3.03.’ Saying this gave me such joy. I know, I’m a jerk.
‘I’m not PAYING for it!’ she snaps back at me.
By this time, fortunately, ‘Alberto’, my manager, like the OWNER manager, Mr. Biggy Shot as Sebastian Maniscalco’s dad would say, is right behind me, has heard the whole interaction from afar, and says:
‘Hi lady, yeah you ordered three drinks, you are going to pay for this drink too. I’m running your card again.’
Now she’s licking her wounds, and if she wants the rest of her first ‘overfilled’ drink, she can lick it off of her car.”
1. Carelessly Make Noise In The Neighborhood? You Better 'Bee' Ready
“Okay, so background info: I (31F) live on the ground floor (Europe) and my downstairs neighbor basically lives in the basement of this building (from my entrance it’s the basement but she (60+) has ground level entry to her apartment. The building is from the 50s so I realize that at times some noise from the neighbors is expected and generally I do not care about it.
For instance, my next-door neighbor often has family over on the weekend and I don’t care about that.
But my downstairs neighbor is so loud when she’s out in her atrium. I’ve lived here for almost 3 years and sure as heck every single sunny day she has guests over in her atrium and they’re so loud that I can’t use my balcony and sometimes they’re even that loud that I can hear them through the closed balcony door.
From the morning to late in the afternoon/evening – I guess she’s retired early and I’m on disability working limited hours. She sometimes even invites someone over so they can use her atrium to fix their motorbike completely ignoring that this is a neighborhood with several multistory apartment complexes close to each other amplifying any kind of noise. She also thinks everything happening in the neighborhood is her business and makes sure to comment loudly on everything going on outside of her atrium (it’s right next to the parking lot and common areas).
So… Today I went and did something good for our environment and to get back at her. I bought a bug hotel and bug-friendly seeds for my flower box for my balcony so she better ‘bee’ prepared for some visitors this spring/summer.”
Another User Comments:
“I mean, if you have something that attracts pollinators, it’s a great thing for the planet and means nothing for her personally.
Honey/bumblebees don’t really do anything to people except if there’s an obvious immediate danger to them. My kids are constantly scootering into them because the plants overgrow onto the walkways and no one’s ever been stung (I feel bad for the bees though, we go right up to them to watch them).
I appreciate the intent and the actual result (good bugs nearby!), but don’t be disappointed if she never even notices (or likes them!)” Scot-ish
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