People Spill Their Baffling Revenge Stories
22. Try To Stop My Parents From Repairing Hurricane Damage? Good Luck!
“A few months back, Florida got pretty beaten up by a couple of hurricanes. My folks live down there, and while none of the damage that they sustained was life-altering horrible or home destroying, homeowners insurance kicked in and they had some water damage through the roof.
They also needed a new one because of all of the shingles that had come off/debris that had punctured it.
My folks looked through roofing options and determined that a metal roof would be a great option to reduce damage/maintenance on their home. Plus, it would serve as a more energy-efficient option with the passive solar collection and fewer thermal losses in the summer/winter.
It’s more expensive, but my dad was basically personal finance incarnate while I was growing up. He’s in his 60s and has finally concluded that he has Screw You Funds so long as that community is concerned, so the roof was a good investment. It looked like a win-win-win with that roof.
Then they reviewed the HOA and saw that, as of 1989, metal roofs are prohibited in the neighborhood, subject to fines and mandatory removal. Reviewing the bylaw further showed that it was clearly referring to older, crappier tin roofs, not a proper metal one like today’s market provides, which looks great and has all of those other benefits.
My folks wanted to play by the rules, though, and called up the HOA to explain the situation. HOA was friendly and said that they would be looking into that bylaw and that my folks weren’t the only ones who requested that they be allowed to have a metal roof.
My parents couldn’t get a roofing contractor in for a few months anyway (too much demand since everyone else’s roof got wrecked), so they waited a few weeks and got nothing new out of the HOA.
Tried again a few weeks later. Nothing. After two months of this, they said screw it and started construction on the metal roof. Popular opinion in the neighborhood was on their side, and the roof was covered with a tarp that wouldn’t last forever. The new roof got installed over the course of a few days— and then we found out the HOA’s trashiness.
The neighborhood has a nice brick sign out front that says ‘WELCOME TO (Neighborhood name).’ It’s very classy, very nice— and was very damaged in a hurricane. The HOA was strapped for money due to other repairs/dues, and some jerks had the bright idea to impose as many fines as they could on the neighborhood to pay for these repairs— starting with my folks.
They served my folks with a letter claiming that they were in violation of the HOA, and demanded a $25,000 fine and that they remove it. Which is, of course, absurd. My poor mother is very much a play-by-the-rules sort, and she was worried sick. Dad’s ex-navy and a contract negotiator. He essentially checked his 60-year-old knuckles and said, ‘oh, you little idiots wanna play, do ya?’ So they set about researching and making some calls.
Poor mom kept waking up at 1 am unable to sleep, and I felt terrible for her as she went through this. But then, they had a breakthrough.
A few weeks after being served (I’m fuzzy on the timeline since I don’t live in Florida, it may have been less) there was essentially a ‘burn them at the stake’ meeting of the HOA where my parents could defend themselves from an absurdly short amount of time and the HOA could rip into them for daring to defy their wrath.
So my mom (because she’s more social/has a better temper than dad) comes up to speak and lets the HOA know that they can’t do this. HOA smirks and says that they sure can, they have a 40-year-old statute saying that they can.
Mom says, ‘You do. But I have State Law on my side, which supersedes your statute.’ Turns out, there’s a law in Florida stating that an HOA (or really, any regulation) cannot be used to prevent an eco-friendly improvement from taking place on anyone’s private property.
And wouldn’t you know it— the passive solar of the metal roof counts as an eco-friendly improvement. Turns out, the roofing contractors have dealt with similar stuff before. When dad mentioned what was going on to them, the contracting officer pulled out a few letters of accreditation and a few past cases where the court had determined that their product was eco-friendly and forced the HOA to pay all legal fees.
My mom produced all of this for the trashy HOA, who had to admit that this was in fact iron-clad. Strapped for money as they were, they couldn’t afford to pay a lawyer.
HOA head growls, ‘Is that all?’
Mom turns up the sweetness to 11. ‘No. I see in the bylaws that we can vote to impeach board members at any HOA meeting and to elect their replacements.
I move to impeach all of you. I nominate my husband, and…’ she rattles off a list of names. HOA is stunned.
While dad looked into the legal, mom looked into the new neighborhood. Popular opinion was on their side, and the hearing was public for the neighborhood. Mom convinced a majority of the homeowners to attend and remove the board for their crappy policy.
With that, my parents are now on the all-new board, and dad is putting his contract negotiation skills/own craftsmanship skills to work repairing the front entrance. And metal roofs are now allowed by the all-new HOA.”
21. Tell Your Supervisor I'm A Liar? Okay, Let's Play
“So I decided to change my internet/cable provider. I had a date and time scheduled for the change and the new provider never showed up. It was an early morning appointment so I was called out of work. They missed the 8-10 am window, I called customer service and they told me they were running an hour late.
Fast forward to 4 pm no one showed, I called customer service back and they told me that the technicians showed up at my residence, couldn’t reach me and they called my home and cell phone multiple times to no avail. So we reschedule, for tomorrow at the same time. And guess what? Another no-show, but they told customer service the same thing that they slammed on my door and tried calling me multiple times.
After jumping through hoops I finally get the warehouse number and where the technicians are based and reached a supervisor who told me that ‘He runs a tight ship and all the guys he works with wouldn’t lie to him’ and went on the accuse me of fishing for discounts or free service by creating problems.
I try to tell him no one called me and no one came to my house and I have the cameras on my house to prove it.
But he wasn’t having any of it. Well, now it’s the weekend. So rather than do fun things on the weekend my hatred fuels me to print out multiple copies of my home and phone records and make full 12-hour copies of my home surveillance cameras.
After talking to upper management for a few days the following week and letting my displeasure be well known, I send in my ‘courtroom like evidence’ (their words).
After some digging management finds something interesting. Turns out those trustworthy technicians have a habit of telling dispatch that their earliest appointments are not home, so they can come in a few hours late. At the end of the day I got 2 deadbeats fired, their supervisor wrote me a letter apologizing for the way he handled the situation and corporate gave me 6 months free internet/cable and 24 months of premium movie channels.”
20. Be A Jerk To Us? Lose Your House
“It’s 2011, my significant other and I decided to rent a house with our best friends – an engaged couple with two kids. I’m changing names here: I’m Kylie, my partner is Jim, and our couple friends are Brad and Angelina.
Jim, Brad, and I are active-duty military.
After over a month of searching, we found a really cute house – 1850 sqft, nice yard, great neighbors, only $1350/m, hardwood except for 1 room, 7 minutes from our base. The landlord is in a different state but tells us she pays one of the neighbors to manage the keys for her. It’s a military town and that’s not uncommon.
We all met up with him, toured the house, decided to sign the lease.
We moved in sometime in August. We liked the house, but there were crickets coming into one of the bedrooms through a crack in the window sill. The landlord didn’t want to fix it and said to caulk it. It worked, no problem.
We noticed the carpet in the living room was a little dingy and asked her if she would mind paying someone to clean it since we moved in that way.
We even made a note of it and took pictures when we moved in. She said no. I bought my own cleaner and the carpet lightened a few shades.
In October, we went to cut the heat on and it didn’t work. So we realized the oil tank was empty. Part of the lease states when we move out we needed to leave a full tank of oil, which isn’t really a problem as long as we start with a full tank and use all the oil in it.
Call the landlord and ask her to have the oil company come to fill the tank – which it’s 2011 so it’s going to cost $1200 to do. She says no. We told her fine, we wouldn’t be leaving a full tank when the lease was over though. She got mad and said we had to because it was a clause in our lease.
We had the oil company provide statements to say the last time it was filled was that prior January and it was empty when they came to fill our tank that month.
We filled the tank, but the heat still didn’t work. It’s been 2 weeks and it’s really getting cold, we asked the LL to get a repairman out to the house.
Brad and Angelina have two small kids that need to stay warm. My landlord took another week to fix the heat, and the people that did it were… questionable. It worked for a month but then quit. We called in our own repairmen to come to handle it since the last ones creeped me out, and he noticed some major issues with the chimney that needed attention right away.
Like it was unsafe to run the heat at all, the thing was about to collapse.
We let her know, emailed scans of the paperwork from our nice Honeywell tech and two quotes from contractors to get the work done. (it’s going to be $3000-3500ish) It’s an emergency repair, at the point it’s December and we are really cold. We were using space heaters.
The kids have chest colds and Angelina is ready to fly into our landlord’s state to handle her physically. I mailed all of that information to her (Angelina’s bodily threats omitted) with signature confirmation and a letter stating the issue.
A few days pass and nothing from our jerk LL. I got onto Google and read the landlord-tenant act and local landlord court cases just to see if I had a leg to stand on.
I also spoke to my JAG, whose brother happened to be a real estate lawyer, who was also friends with my next-door neighbor (the keyholder dude, who surprise, never got paid to watch the house) and decided to come over for dinner with all of us at their place. He gave me some really good info.
The next morning, I called our landlord and told her, ‘look, you get this repair done or I will condemn the house and not pay a dime of rent until it’s done.’ She says she doesn’t believe me.
I overnighted a certified letter to her explaining the issue and requesting the repair be started within 5 business days since it was an emergency and I had already reported it a week prior. 5 days go by, nothing. At this point I’m ready to walk out on the lease but don’t have quite enough legal issues to back that up so – Jim and I requested 20 days of vacation from the military.
I drafted a letter to LL telling her she had 10 days to get the repair done or we would terminate the lease, and we would not be paying rent while the heat was in disrepair. I cited the previous letter and included her signature confirmation for it also. 4 days before we go on vacation, I overnighted and signature confirmed the letter. Two days before we are set to go on vacation I called a city building inspector, set an appointment, he came and condemned the house – it took him less than 15 minutes to decide.
Brad and Angelina took off to Angelina’s mom’s house and Jim and I headed out to spend a few weeks in WARM, SUNNY Florida with his Cuban family. (mmmm, the food). We prorated rent for every day the house was condemned. I called the building inspector every few days to see if the work was done. He also demanded that my landlord do a few minor electrical repairs.
Several days have gone by… I spent half that month’s rent on good food, booze, and Disney World tickets. On the 6th day in Florida, the landlord calls me threatening eviction. I told her to please take me to court because I was ready to embarrass her. I cited the landlord-tenant act, told her I was going to sue for travel costs to FL, hotel costs, and at that point, she was already looking at $850 and it was just going to get more costly.
(Longshot, but, I was mad). I also said we were prepared to just walk out if it wasn’t done by the time the certified letter stated it should be, again, I wasn’t kidding. I had already reserved a Uhaul. Oh, and she would be reimbursing me for that $1100 in oil I hadn’t been able to burn. She said fine and finally replaced the chimney two weeks after the place was condemned.
My neighbor told me she had to borrow funds from her family to get it done. Not my problem. She also told me I was a horrible person who was torturing her and her 5-year-old who were victims of domestic violence. She also told me we were only slightly better than the last tenants. I’m sorry for your situation but your husband has been bad to you since you got together.
How do I know? Turns out, one of my supervisors is friends with her old supervisor and he and other members of her chain of command had responded to fights where she and her husband hit each other. Apparently, the husband is a heavy drinker too. They tried to get her to leave him but she is just as bad, she busted out his windshield one time and burned all his stuff another.
Turns out she got a general administration discharge. She seemed so nice and sweet when we were getting ready to sign that lease. I still can’t believe what a bucket of cuckoo for cocoa puffs she turned out to be.
Whatever, we came home to a house with functioning heat. Brad and Angelina decided not to move back in but that was all cool with Jim and me.
We notarized an agreement between us and told them we totally understood and would take over the rent. Missed them after they left, though.
Later on, in March, a realtor knocked on my door and said he wanted to show the house to a couple. I said you have the wrong place buddy, I’m renting this right now. He’s like no, the owner wants a short sale hopefully by July.
I explained I had no notice and was a little confused but it was okay. He was very uncomfortable and unhappy to have walked into a situation where a tenant didn’t even know he was coming. I told him it was totally fine and went on to divulge some details about his new client. He was pretty appalled. He leveled with me – it’s a cute house but really only worth $90k due to the market crash.
It had last sold for $124k. She’s asking for 120k and on the verge of foreclosure. Seriously? I let the couple and realtor in the next day. Didn’t worry about it after that. He came to take detailed pictures so he wouldn’t have to bother me with flaky potential buyers. He was so nice, I let him help me find a new house to rent when my lease was up.
We are still friends on social media.
Then, in July the realtor called me and asked if he could show the house to a client. Absolutely. I cleaned and made sure I looked nice for her visit… and when they got to my house I noticed the lady was black. And she wanted to rent. I said, ma’am, call me later today and don’t tell anyone.
She did! I told her what my LL said about how she couldn’t believe her past tenants were white because they left the house trashed when they left. I said, ‘I don’t think this is a good house for you, I know a great guy who is renting out his beachside condo for the next year while he goes out to Africa, why don’t you call him?’ I text his listing to her, she calls him, ends up renting his house.
None of that is really revenge. Before we moved out, Jim and I cleaned the house. We left the carpets sparkling clean (had professionals come in and do it), paid a gardener to come in and make the yard spiffy, patched up some small nail holes, and even painted some window trim that was chipped when we moved in. we basically left it better than we found it, we had already repainted 3 bedrooms in flattering colors when we first moved in (that was approved by the LL no problem of course).
We took pictures before and after we moved in. A month goes by, we are all settled in our new condo, and she didn’t give us a dime back in freaking deposit. $2400 down the drain, plus the cost of little repairs we made out of pocket so we wouldn’t have to deal with her crazy butt.
I was angry. I began organizing to go to court.
Then suddenly Jim is told he’s deploying soon. The heck. A week goes by, also, I’m pregnant. Which we were casually ‘not trying but trying’ to do. We were happy about that part, but I was puking every day twice a day and emotional. Then Angelina calls me and guess who is on Craigslist slinging her trash hole slum? My LL. I lost it.
I got on the same forum her ad was on and posted about the house, every single problem we had, every phone call, every snotty email, how many weeks we went without heat, the crickets, LL’s messed up relationship with her off and on again husband, the oil tank, and the racist comments. I never said ‘don’t rent or buy’, just shared my experience as a tenant.
I didn’t name any names but I did link her ad. Received 7 emails thanking me stating LL seemed really nice on the phone but they would be dodging that bullet.
The house foreclosed a few months later.”
19. Make Your Employees Work While Sick? Get Checked By The Health Board
“This was about 10 years ago. At the time I was with my ex-partner, who worked at a petrol station chain in Australia. He came down sick with gastro which is a highly infectious illness resulting in vomiting, diarrhea, fatigue, etc. My ex notified his manager on Tues night that he wouldn’t be able to make his shift the following morning, as he was vomiting copiously still and assumed he would still be by then.
His manager replied that he had to contact other workers to get his shift covered – a jerk move, but not illegal. My ex spends about an hour trying to get someone to cover for him, with no success. He lets his manager know, who responds with ‘you had better show up for your shift or you’re fired, doesn’t matter if you’re sick.’ His manager had a habit of doing this – he recently had made someone work while they had conjunctivitis (extremely contagious) and someone else come in for their shift after they had been in the hospital that day after having an asthma attack.
The following day, my ex went to work. Note that his job also involved food handling as they had a bread store in the petrol station. So people would come in to pay for their petrol, get a coffee and a donut/pie/cake. While handing a customer their cake, he pauses and vomits into a nearby hand washing sink. During his shift, he continues to handle food and go to the toilet regularly because of diarrhea.
When my ex gets home, I ask if he had been unwell and he confirmed he continued to be sick while at work. I am absolutely furious that he was threatened with job loss and most likely has spread his illness to a bunch of other people. So I call the health board of my state and report it. The board sends out someone on a surprise visit to the site and turns out there are lots of bad food handling and hygiene practices going on, not just the worker’s illness issues.
The company ends up being fined $150,000 and had to make significant changes to how some things were run. As for the manager, turns out the whole ‘show up even if you’re sick or you’re fired’ policy wasn’t exactly the company line and he got his butt handed to him over it.”
18. I Got A Free 65" 4K TV
“In 2014 I ordered a 65” 4k TV online from a popular company, Paid about $1700, and some changes for it. It was one of the first 4k TVs available. No 4k content is available at this time but I needed a TV and it seemed like the logical choice to be ready for the future. Biggest TV yet, so big in fact that not only can you watch TV but you can get a tan at the same time from the screen, yee ha!
Fast forward to Dec 2015. 4k Content is now available, yay! However, I was not able to play 4K content on my 4k TV. WHAT? After I bought my TV, the industry decided to integrate some sort of encryption called HDCP 2.2 between the media player and the TV. This new standard required the TV to have a decoder now, which my TV did not have. HDCP 2.2 is copy-prevention technology designed to make it hard for someone to copy a 4k movie.
Because that’s never failed with every media type in the past right? All players use HDCP 2.2 including Cable boxes and such so I could not view 4k now or in the future, ever.
First I called the company I bought it from, they said to call the marketplace vendor, I called them and they said to contact the Manufacturer. The Manufacturer is the one that told me about the new encryption requirement and there weren’t going to be any recalls or updates available.
So I called the company I ordered it from and communicated the findings and I said I’d like a partial refund. I paid a premium for 4k and didn’t receive it. Other than that I’m happy with the TV. Looking at similar TVs without 4k I averaged out the difference and suggested that amount, just a couple hundred.
I didn’t think it was fair to request an exchange or a full refund.
So that’s what I asked for. A lot of phone transfers later they told me no, contact the marketplace vendor. I did the same thing. Went back and forth with managers and supervisors. Everyone was nice but both I and the other parties were firm where we stood.
What I was asking for I felt was pretty reasonable. I spent a few thousand a year with this vendor for over a decade, never asked for anything until now.
I was shown the door.
At this point, I figured I’d give the law a try. Haven’t taken anyone to small claims before and don’t even know if I could take a business to one. But I figured worst case I’ll lose $100 bucks in court filing fees, could lose but gain knowledge of the system and how everything works. Cheap education is the way I looked at it.
Figured since they wouldn’t be reasonable, why should I? Now I’m seeking a full refund and keeping the TV (for my time). So I performed a couple of hours of research and came up with my plan. First I sent a certified letter to the main company, gave them thirty days’ notice, if I didn’t hear anything I was filling in small claims. I heard nothing.
So I stopped by the local courthouse because they don’t have the documents online. How I’m going to sue is all about the advertisement which states ‘Watch all your favorite TV and Movies in 4k!’ To date I haven’t been able to do that, I can also prove I’d never be able to.
At this point, you’re thinking I will sue for False Advertising.
That would make sense. But at least in my state that is not an item you can sue for in small claims. This is where my research came in handy. I filed for breach of contract. The contract being the advertisement stating ‘Watch all your favorite TV and Movies in 4k!’ That was the purchase agreement. I included my evidence and print screens of the advertisements along with my invoice.
Wasn’t sure what was going to happen. I mean the TV at this point is over a year old already. I’m sure they are going to get me on ‘past the return date’, which has been their position from the start on why they wouldn’t help me.
Two weeks until the hearing I received a letter from the court. I didn’t understand it entirely so I called the courthouse.
They said the company didn’t respond to the Summons so I would not be required to show up for court. If the party did end up showing up the case wouldn’t be heard, a new court date would be set to which we would all attend. If the company doesn’t show I win by default.
I didn’t realize courts worked this way and it saved me taking time off work, how awesome!
The company never showed, I won by default. They sent an appeal a day late past the deadline, but what really sealed the deal is they forgot to sign it lol. To clarify I’m not entirely certain if that was called an appeal. The form they sent intended to force the case out of small claims and up a tier to the next level of court so they could bring in a lawyer.
To clarify some states an attorney may represent you in small claims, in other states they cannot. In my state, you are required to represent yourself. In this case, the company would have to fly a company rep out for the hearing.
I made sure to e-mail and CC all parties I communicated with thru this entire ordeal to let them know I won and asked when I would receive my check.
I did that to illustrate how much a few hundred bucks refund request set them back. $1700 and some change, $100 and some change for court fees, and a free 65” TV.
There was one rep I singled out because they were quite rude to me. After sending that e-mail I sent another one to that special person. I wish I could find it. But it included me standing in front of the TV with a smile in a pose like I’m showcasing the TV for a sale, lol.
I inserted that sucker right in the body of the e-mail to save them the task of double-clicking the attachment. No response sadly.
I spoke to their legal department, after asking for my check they said an appeal was sent. I said ‘You sent it a day late and didn’t sign it, I won the judgment ‘Now what?’ I was placed on hold while they checked and confirmed the fax they sent was indeed unsigned and past the cutoff date.
‘Oh, we’ll send the check.’
I deposited the check using my Bank phone app. Why? So I could frame the judgment papers with the physical check in the frame. It’s been hanging on my wall since. Never thought I’d walk away with a couple of thousand dollar TV for a couple of hours of work. Great trade.
Gets better. So I looked around and there was one company that makes this decryption device for this exact purpose!
For people that bought 4k when it was bleeding edge and never got to use it. I think I paid like 200 bucks for it. Once it arrived I connected it and it does work! I can now use my Roku in 4k and watch 4k content, looks amazing! About a week later the company that made the decryption device HD-Fury was sued and they had to take it off their website.
I was pretty lucky to get one when I did. Been going strong 3 years watching 4k Content pretty happy.”
17. Power Trip Me? Get Grilled By A Judge
“My house is literally connected to my elementary school’s perimeter.
I occasionally used to go there at the ripe age of 15 to rip around with my RC nitro cars on weekends. No cars, actually the parking gates were closed but not the human entrances.
Rinse and repeat for 2 years with no problems. I even had patrolling RCMP officers come over and try out my cool toys. In return, they would pull out a HUGE drone from their car and fly it around me to show me what drones are like and what speeds they can go at.
This went well till 2015. 2016 June comes and I am still doing that stuff when suddenly I hear police sirens. Out comes a cop, who gives me a HUGE lecture about how I’m on federal property and I need to IMMEDIATELY get off because I do not have permission. This hotshot acted like I was stealing stuff or something, he even looked through my bag without permission and found a pack of ‘dangerous liquid packs’ which turned out to be sanitizer for my hands.
Anyways, he issues me a $187 ticket for unlawfully operating a remote-controlled blah blah (I forgot).
I was thinking, screw this. I’ll fight it in court. I did my research and the ticket he gave me was actually for people who rip around in their oil-powered RC planes in private spaces without permission. This was obviously some nonsense. I even got the recording of his car dealing with me.
A few months later, I go to the court to contest it (that’s the set date). Jerk cop is there, and he tells me that before I go to court, he can make my fine half if I plead guilty. I say no and I am pretty sure he cursed under his breath.
We go inside the courtroom, the jerk is all loud and proud when giving his statement.
He straight-up LIES, saying I was being belligerent and I almost ran away in fear.
Well, cameras don’t lie, jerk! When it was my turn to give my statement, I played back his cruiser dashcam, which CLEARLY showed him being a jerk, pointing his hands away as if he’s going to fight a 17-year-old puny 5 foot 8 guy.
The judge grilled him. She constantly said this was an mistreatment of power, a waste of resources, and recommended the officer to read up on what public and federal restricted property was.
The whole ordeal was embarrassing for him and I kind of felt bad because people were giving him dagger eyes the whole time.
Anyways, the ticket is thrown out and I head out of the room. I see the cop in the parking lot, and right as I pass by, he says exactly ‘stupid idiot get screwed’. I was shocked by this, so I went home and filed a complaint at his Depot.
No response for 7 days, then 15. So I call them back about it.
‘Yes, he is not working at this branch anymore, we can still assist you with anything pertaining to this report sir.’
‘No, it’s alright, thanks.’
That was it. The jerk either got fired or got moved away.”
16. Teacher Brings The Rowdy Classmate Into The Office
“Back in junior year of high school I️ was sent to AEP (it’s technically out of school suspension in an alternative school), and I️ ended up meeting a super cool chick and we became fast friends. I️ decided to take a sick day and received a text from her saying that some dude was just sent there, and started getting a little creepy.
Nothing too bad, just sat next to her and wouldn’t shut up. All she wanted me to do, was sit by her and act kinda sweet to her so he’d get the message and leave her alone.
Flash forward to the last period of the next day. I️ went into class and sat next to my friend and purposefully got a little comfy with her.
This dude comes in and sits next to me. He was at least 6’2 and pretty shredded. (I’m only like 5’7 lol) He chatted me up for a bit, and I️ decided he was annoying, but not too bad. The teacher passed us our work, and everyone gets quiet.
Everyone, except for this idiot. He keeps going on, and on about nonsensical stuff, and is progressively getting louder and louder.
He’s told to shut up by the teacher and other students multiple times, but just keeps going. He eventually made some snide comment about my female friend, so I️ decided to mess his day up. I️ began by making small comments and started instigating him into doing something stupid. Eventually, ignorance won out. He threw a book across the room, got up, and came over to my desk.
He was almost screaming at this point, and I️ started laughing uncontrollably. Balls up his fist to hit me, so the teacher comes to intervene. The teacher was like 6’4 and had another hundred pounds of fat against this guy. He grabbed him and took him into the office.
But it doesn’t end there.
In AEP, leaving school is much the same as kindergarten.
They call your names, and you don’t leave your seat to leave until you’re called. My friend thanks me, and leaves. My name is called, so I️ get up and walk out. The office was surrounded by plexiglass and was positioned directly to the right of the entrance/exit. I️ walked by and happened to see the idiot sitting in a chair with a serious scowl on his face.
He looks up and mouthed something to me that I️ couldn’t hear. I️ flipped him off with both hands and sauntered out into my mom’s car.
This guy hauled butt out of the school, screaming about how he was gonna screw me up, and ended up getting into a fight with the police that ran out to stop him.
I️ asked later, and he was banned from the entire district and sent to juvie for several months. All for being an idiot. Not especially proud of it, but I️ certainly got results.”
15. Their 9 Months Of Work Didn't Get Credited
“My name is Patrick. I am 18 years old and I’m an Eagle Scout. To get Eagle in my troop you have to lead a 50-mile hiking or canoeing trip which typically lasts a week or more.
For my leadership, I got a long three-week trip to Alaska (which is pretty substantial since we live in a city that borders Mexico.) One week for hiking, one for canoeing, and one for touring. This requires we start planning at least 9 months in advance. I am one of two main leaders for this trip and there is one assistant leader to help us.
Since the trip is in June-July we start planning in August-September.
We start out pretty smooth. Andy (the other main leader on the trip going for Eagle) and I get an idea of who’s going and how much the trip will cost per person while Robert (the assistant leader assigned to help us) manages payments and some paperwork. Things are good. Later on, we start to lose track of our work and get lazy (since the trip is like 8 months away).
So Mr. Sammy (my scoutmaster) starts laying in on us calling us a bad leadership team.
For some reason unbeknownst to me, Andy and Robert decided it was my fault the leadership team had temporarily fallen apart. They team up and decide it’s Me vs Them (which is a really bad way to approach this trip). They don’t talk to me and hide things from me.
When I do paperwork they decide not to take it and do it themselves. Whenever Mr. Sammy gets mad about ANYTHING they instantly look for a way to pin the blame on me.
I decided rather than fighting with them I try to reach out and communicate to maybe save the Alaska trip dream team. That didn’t really work. Every single time I talk to them Robert decides to lash back at me for minor things being as rude and condescending as possible.
Andy (who hasn’t done anything for the trip) just stands behind him with his thumb up his butt. Keep in mind most of this occurs over text. After I’ve reached out as much as possible I decide ‘okay stupid idiots. You wanna fight? I’ll fight.’ But not in the way you’d think.
Flash forward to maybe 4 months before the trip.
Up to this point Robert has done most of the paperwork (since he was deliberately hiding it from me) and has managed all of the payments while Andy has been standing around with his thumb up his butt doing whatever Robert says. Mr. Sammy looks at me like I’m a bag of poop left on his front porch.
This is where the fun begins.
As soon as I get the chance I take all of the up-to-date paperwork from the e-mail to Mr. Sammy from Robert and copy it to my computer. After that, I see that the excel documents this kid has made are TOTAL chaos so I reformat them and update the information to look really uniform and pretty (even if your document is full of nonsense having it look pretty is half the battle).
From this point on the paperwork is in my control. I send an e-mail to Mr. Sammy with the subject ‘UPDATED ALASKA PAPERWORK (insert date)’. From that point on the old man only excepts my copy which Robert and Andy don’t have. Even if they download it from my email I make sure to be the one who updates it and emails it first. I copy my two ‘partners’ on every single email to Mr. Sammy just to say ‘look at me.’
From that point on I control all of the paperwork. Payments, IDs, the roster, the tip calendar, everyone’s contact info, etc. I have it all under security and make sure Mr. Sammy knows it in every email I send him.
The problem is now that when anything goes wrong there’s even more of a reason for Robert and Andy to verbally assault me and put all the blame on me.
But I have my battle plan. I just play it cool. Everything Robert says I just answer ‘okay, is that all?’ And when he’s done I say ‘thanks for the feedback I’ll keep that in mind.’ I’ll give you an example of one of these conversations.
Me: (to a group chat with Andy and Robert) okay guys I updated the roster and other stuff.
Robert has anyone else made a payment recently?
Robert: Maybe.
Me: Maybe?
Robert: You’re missing a lot of info on the payment roster. This kind of carelessness is going to cost me my leadership and I won’t stand for it.
(at this point I think ‘that’s why I’m asking you this, stupid idiot’ but I keep cool)
Andy: I agree.
(‘As always,’ I think.)
Me: That’s too bad. Would you update me on those payments so I can get them updated?
Robert: I guess.
He then gives me all the payment info I need.
Me: Thanks, Robert!
These conversations always made me want to rip my hair out, but by playing it cool and keeping calm, and being nice I never really gave them any reason to go after me.
Now they don’t have anything to give to Mr. Sammy to make me look bad. Just them being rude to me while I say things like ‘Thanks, Robert!’
This ended up making the two so mad that they spent most of their time trying to make me look bad and trying to make me mad that they didn’t spend any time working on the planning for the trip.
This was fine by me even though I had to play attrition with these guys every night for months over a text message. All I cared was that I was looking good, and I was. They weren’t which made them even madder.
When it comes time to distribute the food we need for the trip I also take that over not letting the other two touch it so they can mess it up and blame it on me.
To be fair I could’ve done a way better job at this but I did get the job done and we had all the food we needed for 2 weeks away from civilization (almost).
After 9 months of ripping my greying hairs out for having to deal with these two annoying pestering balls of hate, we are finally flying from our hometown up to Alaska to go on this trip.
Andy and Robert decide to sit back and blend in with the crowd of scouts in khaki uniforms which is perfect for me. I step up making it obvious that I was in charge and leading the scouts through each airport. When we land I make sure to get everyone dressed in their hiking clothes in the airport and packed for the hiking trip. (It was past midnight in the airport so no one was around to watch us change.) After that, we take a bus to the trailhead.
At this point, I have stepped up as much as I can for Mr. Sammy and he noticed pretty well. He also notices Robert and Andy blending in with the crowd not doing anything. I speculate that they probably didn’t want to associate with me because they expected me to mess up and didn’t want to be a part of that mess up.
Jokes on them. I’m looking pretty good at this point.
1st day of hiking. We run into a problem. Two of these stupid younger scouts have forgotten they’re dehydrated meat so now we have to divide up the other meat but first, have to figure out who has it (I didn’t keep good track of who had what food item which I’m willing to admit is my fault entirely).
I notice that after like 36 hours of idleness Robert and Andy have sprung into action to document what food item EVERYONE is carrying. You might think I’d try to stop them but I just thought ‘hey they’re finally doing something.’ I offered them my help multiple times which they refused so I simply sat back and watched.
After they documented everything they called me over to talk.
I knew I was about to get a meaningless lecture from them. It went down exactly as I thought it would. They told me basically…
‘This is all your fault and you need to acknowledge that. You didn’t even help us fix it and you really need to start stepping up because you’re making US look bad.’ They continued to go on but that summarizes what they said.
I simply asked ‘is that all’ and then went to bed. I could practically feel the heat from their foreheads as they got angrier and angrier.
To make a long story short I did really really well leading the hiking trip according to scoutmaster Sammy. After we had finished he came up to me and told me I’d done a great job. As far as he was concerned I had earned my leadership requirement for Eagle but Andy hadn’t and Robert wasn’t doing well either.
He asked me to supervise their leadership for the week-long canoeing trip and week-long touring section.
At this point, I had them right where I wanted them. I knew Andy and Robert didn’t have what it took to lead a trip this big, so I sat back and watched them struggle. It was great.
The canoeing portion went awful. Andy and Robert broke our propane stoves on the first day!
The food was awful and they never planned ahead one bit. I offered to help but always got turned down. I knew they would do that.
After canoeing came the touring part of the trip which went even worse.
For a portion of our touring trip, we stayed in a public park in a small town. Andy and Robert decided it would be a grand idea to leave their stuff outside of their tents at night where anyone could see them.
Come morning time and their backpacks were GONE! Not only did they lose their scout uniforms but also their cellphones and wallets! I acted like I cared but on the inside, I was laughing my butt off.
Later we stayed in an army barracks in anchorage. Mr. Sammy told Andy and me to get the scouts to bed by 10:00 but we both totally forgot. Come 10:20 I was doing laundry for everyone while Andy and Robert were messing around in a community room.
People were laughing and playing cards and even showering. Mr. Sammy had just returned from dinner with an old friend and he was FURIOUS to find people still awake. I could hear him chewing out Andy in the hallway. He came into the laundry room and yelled at my friend and me.
‘PATRICK! WHY ARE YOU TWO STILL AWAKE!’
‘We are doing laundry for the scouts, sir.’
‘Oh… okay.’
AND HE WALKED OUT WITHOUT PAYING ME ANY ATTENTION! He then proceeded to chew out Andy harder and harder for letting people stay awake. He ended up getting all of the blame. Watching him get yelled at was like seeing fireworks in 1830. Beautiful.
Now, almost a year later, I am an Eagle Scout. In case you didn’t figure it out, Andy and Robert didn’t get credit for leadership on this trip.
9 MONTHS OF WORK DOWN THE DRAIN!!! Andy hasn’t even started writing up his eagle project (which is a ton of awful paperwork in my troop). He actually didn’t come to any meetings for like 2 months after the trip. Robert has been scrambling endlessly to make up for his lost leadership which is really fun to watch.
Now I just drive my brothers to the meetings on Tuesdays and get to watch the pair give me dirty looks.
It honestly makes me feel ecstatic. 9 months of dealing with their nonsense every night and 3 weeks of taking it face to face in the woods and it was all worth it!”
14. Dad Doesn't Want To Take The Trash Cans Off Of My Truck
“When I was in high school we lived near the dump so we’d take the trash cans in the back of my truck to the dump ourselves instead of paying for trash collections.
One time my dad decided to take my truck before I got up and went to the dump. I don’t know why, I just would have gone to the dump myself when I got up, but whatever.
He left the trashcans in my truck so when he came in I said:
‘Hey dad, you left the trash cans in my truck.’
‘I know.’
And he walked off. I didn’t have to work that weekend so Saturday goes by… the trash cans are still in there. Sunday morning:
‘Hey dad, you left the trash cans in my truck.’
‘I know.’
Again, no apology, no questions, no reasons, nothing. I went to church with my mom in her car, came home and the trash cans are still there.
‘Dad, you want to get the trash cans out of my truck? I don’t plan on taking them to school with me.’
‘Nope.’
And he left them. The next morning I wake up and the trash cans are still in my truck bed. I take the trash cans out of my truck, past the place where they belong, and put them in the way back of my father’s station wagon (he did sometimes take the trash to the dump in his own car).
I went to school and to this day we have never spoken a single word about it. I wish I’d seen his face when he went to work that afternoon, but I’ll never know how he reacted.”
13. I Got The Incompetent Coworker Fired
“Got a coworker fired for incompetence. My manager wouldn’t do it, so I saved up three months of failures, just documenting them all.
I then took this to my director – and got the woman fired. She was very unqualified for the position we held and was an absolute jerk most days. She posted all sorts of stuff about being an ‘independent woman.’ How she was proud that she was able to support her two fatherless kids. She would often say things like, ‘If we didn’t have a woman in this office, nothing would ever get done,’ after doing something like changing the paper towel roll in the break room.
Which, of course, was something our cleaning staff was already paid to do. She just liked to do things she was actually capable of.
One time she was supposed to give a presentation at a hotel conference room, and made it all the way past hooking up her laptop to the projector before she realized she didn’t have the file on that laptop – it was only saved locally on her desktop in her office.
You’d think we could just remote into it and grab the file? No – she is one of those idiots who turns her enterprise workstation off. It was super embarrassing for our company.
She was my uber driver last week.”
12. Awful Landlord Has A House Full Of Roaches
“A couple of decades ago I was renting a house in the Seattle area and my landlord was a real awful property management company. I had a lot of arguments with them, but when I moved out and cleaned the whole house, nothing had been damaged. Regardless, they decided to keep my $850 deposit, plus they had the gall to say I owed them an additional $10 for ‘cleaning costs.’ Right at the time, I was a victim of a violent crime, and I had to move for reasons related to that.
I didn’t have the time or energy to argue with them about the $860 dollars, and I’d been hospitalized. Feeling beleaguered, I took the first apartment I could afford, and it had roaches. I hadn’t noticed them when I was looking at the place, but after I moved in I saw them. I felt devastated, so many bad things piling up on me. That’s when I got an idea…
I started to catch the roaches in a jar and save them. After about a week I had a good number of live roaches in my jar, so I drove down to the property management office to pay the $10. In the lobby, the secretary asked what I needed and I replied that ‘I thought I owed them some funds… but wasn’t sure how much.’ The secretary got up and left the lobby to find my file, leaving me totally alone.
At that point, I opened my backpack and took out the jar of roaches, opened it, and let them scurry away. Within seconds they had disappeared under floorboards and furniture. A moment later the secretary came out and said, ‘Oh yes, you owe us $10.’ I paid for them and left with a big smile on my face. Petty revenge? Yes. Do I feel guilty?
NO.”
11. I Tipped The Poor Girl About Her Traitor Friend And Partner
“I went out with a girl from Vietnam who made it clear that she was in a fake marriage for a green card with a guy and sometimes had to hang out with him to keep him happy and play along. She was very degrading and treated me horribly in almost all of our relationships.
I was at a bad point in my life and decided to just take it. I caught her staying over at his place one night and realized she had been sleeping with this guy the whole time. I also realized her phone was on airplane mode every single time we hung out.
She always hung out one-on-one with one of her friends’ partners. I always thought it was weird but never said anything.
My intuition was screaming at me that something was up but I ignored it. After we broke up and I got out of my depression, I realized how much of an idiot I was and how I let this girl take advantage of me financially and emotionally. Months after we broke up, I met an amazing girl who I’m still with today and probably will be forever.
Despite this, I was still emotionally scarred from what this girl put me through and I needed revenge to be at peace. I made an anonymous social media account and messaged the friend and said ‘your man is sleeping with insert ex’s name’.
This friend of hers was the one who set her up with the fake marriage, took care of all the paperwork, and set her up with the immigration lawyer.
Whatever transpired the following months after that, I’m not entirely sure. All I know is that she, her brother, and his girl moved out of the house they were in and left the country. They were all currently in college and had big dreams of making a living in America.”
10. Cut My Hours Because I Refuse To Falsify Documents? Have A Word With The FBI
“A few years back I was fresh out of EMT school. I was picked up by a transport ambulance company.
It was only temporary till I could get hired by the county 911 service. So I was going through my day-to-day transporting patients from nursing homes and dialysis centers. I have always been very thorough with my documentation being factual and true. This transport company had an issue with it because it was causing Medicaid to deny claims with billing. They had me rewrite some of my transport documents in their chosen language.
It seemed really odd that I would be considering a patient that can walk and sit with assistance as non-ambulatory, they must lay flat. After a few weeks of this, I was frustrated with billing kicking my documents back. I told the lady that I will no longer change my patient care reports because I felt it was not true.
A few days later I get the schedule and notice I’m only on for two days.
That would only be 24 hours of work for an entire week. When I inquired about the change they stated it was because the call volume has slowed down. I ate this serving of trash and walked out.
Later on that day I got a call from the company I wanted. In short, I had the time off to go and interview. I substance tested the same day and was hired. They wanted to know when I could begin and I started immediately.
Two days later it was time to start my first shift at my new job. It was also the day I was supposed to work at my previous job. I walked into my previous employer in my new uniform for my new gig. I turned in my ID and key card and began to leave. On the way out the supervisor had some words to say about my work ethic.
Again, I ate the serving of trash and walked out.
I still had an hour and a half to burn before starting my new shift. I chitchatted with one of the guys outside of my old employer’s lot. He suggested I file a complaint about fraud. I was actually in a pretty good place to do so. I took his advice and contacted the department of health and advised them of what happened. After that, I kinda forgot about it and went about my life.
Fast forward 2 years later I became a volunteer firefighter outside of my 911 EMT gig. A woman showed up one evening and asked for me. I came outside and she flashed an FBI ID. This scared me. I don’t know how many people have had the FBI randomly find them at work but it will make you wonder about every little bad thing you’ve ever done in your life.
She explained she was there due to a Medicaid fraud case and asked if I had any information. We sat for hours as I sang like a songbird. She said not to worry about the falsified record, that it will in no way affect my certifications. I was pretty much immune from the case. She thanked me and left.
Fast forward 6 months. I’m at work when a co-worker asks if I heard about a local company getting raided by the FBI.
Holy cow was I surprised. Sure enough, it was on the news. Pictures and video of them carrying documents out of the building. They shut ’em down for a few days while investigating. Turned out they lost their ability to bill Medicaid, Medicare, and had to renew their ambulance franchise agreement. The woman in charge of billing was fired and things pretty much rolled downhill from there.
Surprisingly they are still around but I’m sure it hurt their reputation more than their pockets.
In short, it’s always best practice to handle business professionally and beware who you poop on, or you might get to eat your own serving of poop.”
9. Weird Schoolmate Ended Up With Only One Friend
“When I was a kid there was a girl at my school who was really weird.
She never spoke above a whisper and had a super overprotective mom with these freaky giant long nails who she’d always rat people out to. If you crossed this girl in any way at all, her mom would be outside the fence at lunchtime and wave you over and tear you a new b******e. It got to the point where even her friends were kind of terrified because if you so much as tricked her during hopscotch (or whatever 7-year-old girls were playing at the time, I forget), there was the terrifying mom waiting for you.
Eventually, she threatened to tell her mom about me for something tiny. I don’t even remember what, I avoided her as best I could. Must’ve been some insignificant interaction, like I took her coat hook or some crap. So I started telling everyone she was evil and to avoid her, and people actually did. This girl ended up with practically no friends except for one other girl.
Things kind of evened out but from then on everybody was even more on eggshells around this girl and most people chose not to interact with her at all for fear of her mom.
In hindsight, that mom was probably so overbearing that her kid never learned to interact for herself, but I don’t think I really changed anything so much as made people realize that yeah, the best way to avoid the mom was to avoid the daughter.
Last I heard, the girl was in university and had a reputation for being super quiet but seemed normal enough.”
8. So You Like Pranks, Huh? I'll Bathe You With Moldy Water
“In my second year at uni, we had a housemate that we all liked to pull pranks on (he was insanely tall and liked to act like the alpha male so we had to bring him down a peg or two).
One day he’s asleep and my housemate says he’s gonna go into his room and throw a cup of water on him. For once I felt bad for him so I said I wasn’t going to partake. 5 minutes later, my housemate runs back into his room giggling and locks the door, to which I say ‘I guarantee you he’s gonna think it was me and mess with my room instead.’ Lo and behold, 5 minutes later I hear the door to my room open and close, so I walk in there to find an entire bucket of water upturned on my bed. At this point, I’m pretty annoyed cause I had nothing to do with the initial prank.
So I go downstairs to the kitchen, find a huge dish bucket full of old dirty plates and cutlery, (swimming in chunks of mold where the plates had been sat festering in it for at least a month), carried it to his room, and threw it over his head, covering him not only in moldy water but also some cutlery that I had failed to remove.
As a result, I accidentally broke one of his ps4 controllers, he had to go take a long shower to wash the residue off himself, and the room smelt so bad that he had to sleep in the lounge for the next 2 weeks.”
7. Jerk Admin Lost A Couple Of Group Members
“I was in a fan group for a video game on social media. The admin was a jerk. She thought everyone loved her because everyone joined the group (the game was extremely popular). She annoyed me, but the group for the most part was run rather well.
Eventually, some people started complaining about swearing. They said their kids used the group and they didn’t want their kids seeing such language. So a rule was added that prohibited foul language.
By this point, the admin has a circle of people who worship the ground she walks on. These people often tiptoe over the edge of the rules and she ignores it. A new girl enters this circle.
She hates the no profanity rule and constantly ignores it. Every other word in her post is some sort of profanity. The admin ignores it as per usual for one of her circles of sycophants.
My friend ends up posting something and in the middle of a few paragraphs wrote the word ‘darn’ once. Admin throws a rant in a comment about how she is tired of people breaking the rules and bans my friend.
Sycophant quickly responds in the comments cussing out my friend.
I decide that I am going to do something. That particular girl is getting banned from the group. I quickly decided the admin’s ego would be the best target to use for my goal.
I make up a bunch of photo-shopped messages that look like they’re from that girl. I made sure pixel by pixel everything looked right.
The messages were all threatening and petty, with some rather crude remarks about the admin throughout the whole thing. I sent them to the admin pretending to be a member of the group the girl sent those messages to because I said something to her about watching her language because I didn’t like profanity in a group where kids might be present. She barely seemed to buy it, so I was worried there would be little fallout.
The admin posted a huge post in the group about how she felt betrayed by the girl and how that kind of talking behind her back was a bannable offense. The admin banned her.
I ended up leaving the group after I got into an argument with the admin about a new rule prohibiting mentioning any other games besides the game of the group in a good light.
I still got my petty revenge and laugh about it to this day.”
6. Sneak Behind My Back While I Support You? I'll Make Sure To Hurt You
“When I was 14, I started high school, like most 14-year-olds are scheduled to do, but I really didn’t feel ready. My older brother passed away less than a year prior (cardiac arrest) and my life just spiraled from there. My grandma passed away a month after (cancer, but she was in hospice for a minute so we knew it was going to happen eventually), and then my older cousin passed away (breast cancer; she got chemo the year before and was in remission, but it randomly came back strong the second time so there wasn’t anything that could be done) and my grandfather passed away (trying to be a 96-year-old manly man and put himself in bed from his wheelchair, and he shattered his hip, and as it turns out he had pneumonia that wasn’t being treated while he was in the hospital) and so on and so forth.
Other people passed away and it hit me more and more each time, but I was 13/14 and there wasn’t anything I thought I could do other than fall into depression.
Even though I was in an extremely dark place, I was really hopeful that high school would be the opportunity I needed to get my life back. On the first day of school, I was boy crazy because I was hanging out with other girls who were and I figured that it could be a fix for my depression.
My mother is a pastor, so other than getting prayed for and praying, there was nothing being done to treat my depression and the only thing my mother could think of was to spank me and punish me whenever I isolated myself. I spent the entirety of my first day ogling boys and envying girls I compared myself to. At the end of the school day, I was walking to my bus and saying bye to my friends and bumped into a white boy, with long, very curly hair and soda bottle glasses.
He had a bandanna wrapped across his head, a rainbow tie-dye shirt, and a faux cow suede vest with fringes. He was holding his skateboard in one hand and smoking with the other. When we looked at each other, all I could say was ‘my bad, dude… I respect your vibe’ and I walked away, occasionally looking back at him and saw that he was still looking at me and I waved before getting on my bus and he waved back.
The next day, I asked everyone if they knew ‘a hippy looking boy with soda bottle glasses’ and finally someone said, they knew Tony. They continued to inform me that he was a junior and didn’t ‘believe in relationships, so, aside from his ex, no girl can tie him down.’ They said they always saw him in the Drama hallway, with all of the theater kids.
I made a plan with my best friend, Keke, to go to the Drama hallway and pretend to sign up for the play after school. As soon as we went, we were greeted with a round of applause and hugs from the older thespians, who were thrilled to see fresh meat show an interest in their pride and joy. We introduced ourselves and, after announcing my name out loud so all thirty-sum people could hear me, one person immediately said ‘Iris… a girl named Iris… nice to meet you,’ and as you suspect, it was Tony.
To speed things along, I ended up joining the Drama club, primarily because I felt like it was the perfect niche for me but also because Tony was in it. I signed up to do hair and makeup for the fall play and Tony was a part of the stage crew, where they stay after school every day and assist the contractor in building a custom design set for each production.
I asked him if there were any girls in the stage crew, and aside for one older girl who graduated already, it was mainly a small group of guys.
As you can guess, I joined and so did Keke because we were adamant about having each other’s backs. I was partially interested in woodwork and building at the time (I was 14 and I managed to mount my TV to my wall by myself) so I was looking forward to learning how to use a nail gun, a saw machine, stain wood, design something, take precise measurements, and have everything come together into something beautiful.
After week two of high school, Keke and I were staying after school every day to work on the set for the play and I was able to get to know Tony, without looking too desperate. He asked me to be his girl on the last Friday of September. I told him that it felt like the last true day of summer, and I also told him I never had a partner or kissed a guy before.
We had an established routine of going to the lake, parallel to my high school, and eating lunch before the stage crew started (we had from 2:15-3:30, to be exact). He kissed me after I asked him if I could try to smoke and started coughing after one pull. We walked back to campus holding hands and it felt like we were making our debut as a couple because almost everyone looked at us.
It was like in those high school movies, where everyone’s attention is on the focal point and it’s really dramatic. I felt accomplished because I, a freshman, was the one who tied down Tony Bologna, one of the ten most longed-for boys in my high school. Little did I know, he was the biggest can of worms in the tri-state area and my dumb self opened the can, y’all.
My brother, who was also a junior, told me I was dumb and advised me to end things with him, but I assumed he was just being protective of me.
As we went out, he taught me everything I was willing to learn about. I learned how to skateboard, how to smoke without coughing, how to buy packs without looking like I wasn’t old enough, and which type of stuff to smoke.
I learned the different levels and intensities of kissing. I learned how to navigate the hallways of high school without looking like a lost duckling. A girl, who was a senior in the drama club and who I worshipped on a semi-regular basis, came up to me and told me that she heard a rumor that I was going out with Tony and wanted to let me know.
I told her that it wasn’t a rumor and her entire tone shifted. She asked me if I was sure we were officially together because he has a reputation to go for vulnerable freshmen just to manipulate them and hook up, and I told her that we’d already been serious for about a month and I was a virgin but he respected the fact that I wasn’t ready.
As soon as I said I was a virgin, her eyebrows went up and she laughed in my face. She apologized for laughing and said ‘I’m not laughing at you being a virgin, I just didn’t realize Tony wasn’t addicted to hooking up anymore… when we were together, all he wanted to do was sleep with me so I broke up with him.
I didn’t realize he’s a new person now, and I never really fell out of love with him… thank you for letting me know!’
I should have paid more attention to what she said, but I was so jealous. She was THE ex, and she was a senior, and she was such a confident jerk. I told him about the conversation during our daily lunch at the lake and he said that ‘even though 30% of me would still go out with Sam, and 80% of me would definitely still sleep with her, I’m crazy about you and I don’t want to lose you,’ and I thought that was the most romantic thing ever.
In an effort to compete with her, I started adjusting my style and wore more black. I wasn’t willing to give up my virginity to compete with her, but I knew that they both smoked and drank. I heard rumors about him being a dealer and selling illegal stuff, but I didn’t believe it to be true for a second.
In October, he told me about a Halloween/birthday party his friend was throwing and ask if I could come.
I meticulously planned it out: I asked my mom if I could spend the night at a friend’s house nearby and she happily agreed, thinking that my mental health was finally improving. I went to CVS and used my lunch allowance to buy liquid eyeliner and dark red lipstick. After school, we went to his house and I met his very sweet and liberal parents.
We stayed in the movie area of the basement and watched Benchwarmers and made out the whole time. We went upstairs to eat dinner shortly after and being in the presence of a functional family that loved and respected each other made me feel so uncomfortable, so I was pretty silent.
After we all ate dessert and watched ‘Adventure Time’ in the living room, he drove me to my friend’s house and we planned to meet up at the party.
I wore black shorts, with fishnets underneath, combat boots, and a grey cropped sweater with skulls on it. My friend did my makeup and we walked 10 blocks, in late October weather without coats at 10:30 PM, to the party. When we got there, we saw grown adults, between 18-30 years old, and we thought we were at the wrong place. I saw his ex, Sam, and realized I was exactly where I needed to be.
A 26-year-old man greeted me, saying he was Tony’s best friend, and gave me booze, filled with what I thought was just orange juice. I never tasted booze so I didn’t realize that it was the weird taste I noticed in the orange juice and I drank the entire thing without really pausing, on an empty stomach.
As soon as Tony came, several guys rushed to greet him and I stood up and tried to walk towards him… that booze HIT me like a truck.
I threw my body on him and he immediately knew I was wasted. He started asking me how I got wasted and what I had to drink and why I drank so much and repeatedly asked if I was okay. He sat down in a chair and placed me on his lap and fed me water, without making it obvious to people that I was really wasted. Wasted me appreciated the care and attention he gave me at that moment and I was feeling really confident and in love.
I whispered in his ear that I loved him and he whispered it back, then I started whispering about doing a bunch of inappropriate things with him without realizing that we were sitting in a circle of people passing around stuff to smoke.
I felt Sam looking at us a few times and I decided to look her dead in the eye after passionately kissing Tony.
I felt like such a baddie, so when Tony was hitting one of the smokes, I took it from his hands and took a good hit to celebrate my victories, and coughed my lungs out. When Tony was ready to leave, he drove my friend and me back to her house and, after I changed and wiped my makeup off, her older sister dropped me off at my house.
That was where things took off for me.
I managed to do a variation of this routine for the entire school year. My parents were convinced that I wasn’t depressed anymore, but being around his stable family so often made me resentful of mine and I always picked a fight with them, by criticizing the way they always dismissed me and ignored how badly my mental health was.
I found solace in my crazy partner and his unemployed adult friends, and I clung to him as my feelings got stronger. He suggested illegal substances as a remedy for my depression and, after taking them, I grew even more infatuated with him. In March, he was arrested for having substances in his locker.
He wasn’t allowed to return to school until the next year and he had to take substance classes and attend meetings every day.
After a month, he was allowed to take night classes so he wouldn’t fall behind on school. For some reason, I thought that WE were going through this tough time and I kept insisting that we were going to ‘get through this together.’ It annoyed him big time and he became really distant for the rest of the school year but I didn’t want to push him away even more, so I gave him space when he wanted it and I continued to hang out with his friends, do stage crew and hair and makeup, and I even got cast in the spring musical.
Over the summer, we periodically hung out, but it felt like we weren’t even together. Whenever people asked about him, I would make up some lie about how he was doing better and I regularly saw him, as if our relationship wasn’t in limbo. I turned 15 and, towards the end of the summer, we started talking and seeing each other more and our relationship felt brand new.
He wasn’t selling illegal stuff anymore but he still smoked.
My best friend, Keke, told me to break up with him after he got arrested, but I told her that she couldn’t possibly understand what I was going through. I told her that on our one-year anniversary, I was going to sleep with him. She told me that I was an idiot for sticking with him and that letting him take my virginity was the dumbest thing I could do.
Mind you, Keke lost her virginity before we even started high school, and she regularly smoked with her 35-year-old mom, so I didn’t know why she had such an issue with me doing the same things.
When September came, and the sophomore year started, I had a pixie cut, I developed my own style that I was confident in, and I got a new pair of glasses that looked just like Tony’s.
I met him at his locker before the first class started and he was annoyed that I got glasses that looked like his. I asked him if he was still interested in stage crew and he said he wouldn’t want to do it if I planned on signing up too. I told him I was planning on auditioning for the play and I wasn’t just doing stage crew because of him.
I didn’t want to give it up just because he believed I was only doing it for him, so I stuck with the stage crew and I auditioned, and I got an understudy role. Keke continued to do stage crew with me also, even though she wasn’t interested in it, and I was planning to only talk to her and the others after Tony upset me, but our friendship wasn’t the same after we got into the argument where she called me an idiot.
For some reason, Tony noticed that Keke and I weren’t talking and asked her why, but they were consistently having conversations and completely forgot about me. Whenever they were talking it was always at a distance where I couldn’t hear what they were saying and when I tried to enter one of their conversations, they would stop talking and look at me until I walked away.
I told Tony what Keke said about breaking up with him and he told me that she was just being a good friend and, based on what she told him, I was a jerk to her. I told Keke that Tony thought I was copying him, and even though she knew I was just into stage crew and I just liked my glasses and they had nothing to do with him, she agreed that I was copying him and told me I looked like a desperate, lost puppy and, based on what he told her, I turned him off.
The week prior to our one-year anniversary, I messaged Keke and apologized for being insensitive. I begged her to help me prepare for my first time because I was really nervous and after sending her a dozen messages, she replied, saying this: ‘You have to stop. You can’t sleep with Tony and you have to let it go. You weren’t being a jerk and I’m not mad at you.
I just feel guilty and it’s really hard to be friends with you because of what I did. I don’t even know how to tell you this and I’m scared you’ll never talk to me again if I tell you.’
After assuring her that I wouldn’t cut her off, she confessed that she and Tony have been hooking up since he and I first started going out.
She admitted that she told me to break up with him because she was jealous and she called me an idiot because she couldn’t stand how much I trusted and loved her and Tony. She told Tony about my plan for our anniversary and he started pushing me away because he felt guilty too. He told her not to tell me the truth and that he was going to eventually break up with me to be with her, but she couldn’t hold it in any longer.
THE REVENGE: I was in such shock, that all I could do was thank her for telling me the truth. I told her I needed space and I asked her not to tell Tony about our conversation at all. I didn’t tell her that I had a plan but I knew that virtue had no place in this situation. We proceeded to stay together and I acted like I didn’t know about him lying to me.
I gave him less attention than I normally did and he started coming to my locker instead and would text me first. It wasn’t obvious that I was mad or upset with him, but I really couldn’t stand to be around him or even pretend to. I would dodge his kissing without thinking and walking away without hugging him, so he knew something was up.
I told him that I was acting weird because it bothered me that he thought I was copying him, and he felt so horrible. He spent the entire day apologizing, telling me that he loved me and that he was going to make up for it on our anniversary.
On our anniversary, I dressed up a bit and wore a black high-waisted mini skirt and a black cropped Pink Floyd t-shirt, and my classic high-top converse.
He came to my locker with a few sunflowers and was shook when he saw me. He told me that I looked as hot as the day he met me. Our original plan was to have a picnic by the lake after school, then go to his house when his parents were out for bible study, and sleep together.
INSTEAD, I snuck outside during lunch to the student parking lot and keyed ‘LIAR’ on the hood of his car.
I put on the dark purple lipstick I wore fairly often and left kisses on his side mirrors. I wrote ‘Screw you, womanizer!’ on his rear window with the lipstick. I snuck back into school before lunch was over and I texted him and told him to meet me by the lake for our picnic, instead of coming to my locker. The lake is across the street from the student parking lot, so he would have to pass his car to get to the lake, which is exactly what I wanted. I told Keke to pretend to be confused if he accuses her of telling me the truth and she did exactly that.
People were taking pictures of his car and sending them to me, asking me if I did it and I never admitted to being responsible. My brother sent me a picture of Tony’s car also and told me that he was proud of me.
After Keke told me the truth, I asked his close friends if they knew and they were all shocked and annoyed and disappointed in him.
I also asked them not to mention anything and told them I had a plan.
After Tony saw his car on our anniversary, he took pictures of it and sent them to me. He asked me how I found out and if Keke told me about them and I pretended to be completely clueless and surprised, and so did Keke. He couldn’t figure out if I did it or if Keke did it and, when he realized we were both ‘confused’ and upset when he accused us, he stopped trying to figure out who it was.
Keke and I didn’t really get back to being friends, but I know she didn’t tell Tony that I was the one who messed his car up because she was also heartbroken over him and she didn’t want him to think that he had a chance with her, so she let him believe that both of us were potentially responsible. She had no idea I was going to mess his car up, but she did commend me for doing so.
I broke up with him when he sent me pictures of his car and mentioned ‘Keke telling me about them’. He never admitted that he was sleeping with Keke, but I acted like I had no idea what he was talking about when he texted me and I kept asking him what he meant about ‘Keke telling me about them’, and I pretended to put two and two together, and told him that it was over if he didn’t explain himself, and he never did.
After he stopped selling illegal stuff, a lot of people ghosted him and when he told his close friends about everything that happened, they told him that they already knew everything and that he was foolish for messing things up with me. Tony eventually came clean and apologized to me for lying to me and asked for another chance to be with me. I accepted his apology and declined his request to get back together.
We haven’t talked since then and he still doesn’t know who messed his car up.”
5. Hot-Headed Coworker Faces Lawsuit
“We had a warehouse that would get an influx of inbound trailers each morning, then would shut down at night. Employees arrived about 30 minutes before the trucks started rolling in.
We had a warehouse worker that was an extreme hot head. He just went nuclear over every little thing.
He had forgotten to clock back in after his break so his check was 2 hours short. He went to the payroll girl and she saw the error and told him it would be corrected and that he would get the two hours of pay on his next check. He blew up and basically said ‘screw you, and screw this company… I quit,’ and threw his badge at her and walked out.
Late that night, he came back to the warehouse (we had him on camera) and cut the wires to the electronic gate, and filled the manual lock with a compound like JB Weld (can’t be removed).
Employees showed up the next morning and couldn’t get in. They called maintenance and the guys couldn’t get inside to get tools because there is barbed wire on the fence.
Some people left to get their personal tools and came back about 45 minutes later. By that time, trucks were backed up down the street. It took about 30 minutes to get the gate open and people scrambled in to get the business going.
They have a vacuum tube for drivers to send in their paperwork as you see at bank drive-thrus. The dispatcher that receives the paperwork and tells the driver what dock door to go to, gets inside and scrambles to get everything ready.
The trucks came in, but the dispatcher couldn’t send the tube carrier thing through. And the vacuum system burned out.
We later discovered that he had cut the barbed wire on the back of the warehouse fence and poured an 80lb bag of Quikrete into the tube, then poured water in. So the tube was blocked with concrete. So they had employees running to all of the trucks to get the paperwork.
All said and done, he caused about $15k in damage and put the operation about 4 hours behind.
In the lawsuit, he ended up being on the hook for about $25k. All because of two hours pay being delayed by a week due to his own mistake. He probably made about $18/hr… so about $36. Probably not his wisest decision. But if he wanted to cause disruption, he certainly accomplished that.”
4. Make Sure To Read The Signs So You Won't Get Towed
“There was an IT business with limited parking for employees and contractors, in a gentrified area that was now bustling with nightlife and new money. Because parking was so scarce, the IT business had put up multiple signage and even installed cameras to let people know that parking was not allowed there without prior permission. Those who do so are often towed away very quickly.
Most people get the message straight away but some unfortunate people refuse to read the signs.
Enter Jerkhead in his BMW. Mr. Jerkhead parked in the no-parking zone and promptly left for an extended period, plenty of time for the tow truck to sneak away with his vehicle. Now when this happens you simply call the number already on the signs and pay a fee to get your car out, because it happens so darn often the fee is considerably lower than getting your car towed in other areas.
The IT business does NOT make a cent from having cars towed, they don’t care to allow parking at any time day or night because of the nature of the business.
Mr. Jerkhead doesn’t care, he rings the tow company and demands his car back, and then promptly keys an employee’s car after kicking the defenseless vehicle. Little did he know, that while his vehicle was illegally parked, surveillance cameras captured the make, model, and license plate of his vehicle, along with his crime in the act.
The IT company sent the footage to the police, who later visited the man at his home. The man completely denied everything, saying it wasn’t him in the video and the police ended up dropping the charges. Our hapless employee was stuck with damages to his vehicle without any more recourse, or so he thought.
As Mr. Jerkhead was preparing for the next level in his burgeoning career, his potential employers revealed a video had surfaced detailing his exploits.
The employers decided they did not wish to hire a man who would so wantonly destroy private property, disregard posted warnings, and vehemently deny the allegations despite being presented with overwhelmingly evidence.
Jerkhead then contacts the IT company pleading with them to remove the video, to which they comply… IF he agrees to fully pay for the damages to the employees’ vehicle AND provide a written apology.
He refuses at first, but realizing he will be stuck without future economic prospects he eventually relents.”
3. I Helped The Jerk Make His Project Then Burned It To The Ground
“This kid who was one of my good friends since preschool decided that I was better for picking on than being friends with when we got to high school. He would say all sorts of vile stuff to try to get a reaction out of me, especially in front of people that he thought were ‘cool kids’.
He’d sneakily draw racist stuff in my notebooks and then one day when I went to go to flip the page for a fresh sheet of notebook paper, bam, lab partners or teachers see and give me the weird looks. At some point, he said some terrible stuff about my mom, and another friend had to physically restrain me from killing him in history class.
I calmed down and realized I was letting things get out of hand and if I wasn’t careful I was going to get myself in trouble. I needed a more nuanced and subversive approach to my problem.
Needless to say, this kid was not doing well in school. He wasn’t a total idiot but he was too busy smoking and being a jerk to get his schoolwork done on time.
Anyway, he’s failing a few classes and decides to make a concerted effort to pass. His hardest class is chemistry, which I happen to be in with him. I see my chance. I offer to help this repugnant piece of work study and take notes in chemistry for a big important upcoming project. In his eyes, I’m like a pathetic beta dog in his pack, desperate for the approval of my leader.
Despite all the emotional torment he’s put me through, he doesn’t think twice about taking help from someone with seething, fiery hatred coursing through his veins being driven on by the thought of sweet revenge and the eventual subjugation of his enemy. We fill his notebook up. I essentially do his project for him, encouraging him, feeding his ego, assuring him he’s gonna pass, and maybe even with a fairly good grade…
And then the day before the project is due I steal that loathsome jerk’s notebook complete with his entire project inside and ceremonially burn it in my garbage can in the alley behind my house while pumping Led Zeppelin’s version of ‘How Many More Times’ on my uncle’s hand me down vinyl player as loud as my speakers would go. Rarely in my life have I felt so much pleasure as I did watching him stammer to the chemistry teacher that he swears he had his notebook with his project yesterday and watching the teacher, basing his judgment what a terrible and careless student this kid has been all year, basically tell him he thought he was full of it and that if he didn’t have the project he failed. He did fail and then not long after he dropped out and, subsequently, his life went down the proverbial ‘tubes’.
Most importantly though, it’s a very good amount of time later and I’m still not sorry.”
2. Jerk Manager Gets Taught By His Subordinates
“A few years back. I was working for a video store back when those were still a thing. I was close with my coworkers and my supervisors. We all hung out when not working and it was great. We would all hang out after close waiting for the others to get off to hang out.
One day my shift leader Bob (real name because Bob is my homeboy) got dumped by his trashy ex. We all hated her and thought it was a blessing she was gone and wouldn’t be around. The downside was Bob did not take the break-up well. He became an uber jerkhead constantly and made our lives miserable because he wasn’t happy.
We all felt for him but enough was enough.
I had decided that if Bob was gonna stay angry at us for nothing I should at least give him a reason. It was a Friday night and a little before closing. I went to the safe and exchanged every dollar from all of the tills with rolled coins. Then because that wasn’t the plan I unwrapped every roll. My coworkers thought it was funny so we all took our heavy tills to the office for him to do the final count for the night and quickly ran back up front to let the drama ensue.
It was a perfect storm. Bob walks to the office as we all watch with pregnant silence. Less than a minute later we hear the cursing start. We all bust up. Bob is broiling anger and storms out of the office and begins to curse at all of us. I man up and tell him it was me. Bob sidearms a DVD and it barely misses my head.
I am in tears because I am laughing so hard. We help him finish the count and we all head out. Bob refuses to talk to me for about a week and apologizes finally about trying to ninja star me with a DVD case. I told him that my thought process was to get him so angry that he would finally get over his post-break-up hump.
I actually was thanked by him. Petty acts can be used for the greater good.”
1. Be Petty About A Gaming Console? Here's A Strip Of Bacon
“Several of my friends in college were members of the campus Jewish fraternity. The house had two kitchens, a regular kitchen where most of the food was made, and a kosher kitchen for special events and feeding the brothers that kept kosher.
There were only a few brothers that had keys to the kosher kitchen because if it was contaminated it had to be re-koshered in a lengthy process by whoever made the violation.
One of the older brothers, who had kosher kitchen access, started to become possessive of the house GameCube, which the other guys were pretty much constantly using. In order to be able to play whenever he wanted, he started locking the GameCube away in the kosher kitchen, to the dismay of the rest of the house.
This petty and egregious power trip annoyed my friends, who decided to get back at him by hiding a strip of bacon in the GameCube’s CD tray. Sure enough, he put the GameCube away in the kosher kitchen, bacon and all, inadvertently breaking kosher and forcing him to clean the whole room. The GameCube issues stopped the next day.”
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