vbrh01
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Been in this situation twice....really 4 times (don't ask). IMO, the therapist that commented has 2 fundamental flaws in their response: they clearly have never supported a spouse who's depressed and doesn't understand depression from a first person perspective. The absolute best thing you can do for HIM and yourself is follow through on that ultimatum a/o kick him out until. I'd bee happy to give you the details of my experience, but the short version is: 3 partners I enabled until they used me up and we split. 1 I gave a "don't come home without a job" directive to and we are together and happy 7 years later. I also spent time unemployed and depressed, Best thing I ever did was get moving and trudge through the discomfort. You're not helping him or you by allowing this to continue. Self-esteem comes from DOING not FEELING.