sticklerforcorrectbehavior
Metaspoon User

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DO NOT do anything for him for Father's Day. If he says anything tell him the exact things he said to you. He is gaslighting you by calling you abusive and telling you that you "always" do things like this. He is the one being abusive and if I were you I would start documenting every time he does this.
Why doesn't your mother do her own laundry? Why can't she feed and take care of your brother? I would tell her to be his slave and you will take care of your grandmother.
NTJ! When I was in college, I had a roommate who never bought food but would eat mine. I have been cooking since i was a child so i would buy things that were not fast food but needed cooking. If i was out for a day, I would come back to missing food that she would take to her boyfriend's place so he could cook for her. I finally got a chain and lock for the refrigerator and she got extremely mad and reported me to the RA. Since i had already cleared getting the chain/lock with the RA (after telling her every time food was missing that she was basically stealing food), she told her that she needed to shut up. The RA also told her that I had receipts for the food I bought and that I could actually contact the college admins and have her charged with theft. She complained to her boyfriend and as he hadn't known that she was stealing the food for him to cook (he ate too), he broke up with her and actually paid me back for the food as he had eaten it too. She started yelling at me the night he broke up with her and the RA heard and came to see what the problem was, then told her that he was going to contact the people in charge of the dorm. She ended up leaving to stay with a friend in another dorm and then dropping out because she thought that she was able to do anything that she wanted and did not like the consequences.
NTJ! I have a twin sister (fraternal not identical) and our parents dressed us alike for much of our childhood. I am and will always be a tomboy and my sister is and always has been a "girly" girl. When our parents finally figured out that party dresses were not for everyday use (sorry mom and dad, but I loved to climb trees and go fishing), I was finally allowed to have some say in what I wore. My mom still tried to get me to dress and act more like my sister, (who was promiscous from age 14) but i told her I wasn't jerk and having jerk with any male who asked and she should let me be me. I wore a dress when I graduated high school and then got caught up in the "disco" phase (I loved to dance) and started wearing more dresses and even makeup and high heels for a couple of years. When I went away to college, I went back to tomboy apparel and did not go out to dance or party because I was studying and enjoying my life. My mom finally stopped trying to make me into something I'm not and we got along much better.
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