riwi
Metaspoon User
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NTJ, and without further information no one else is either. There are many of us who cringe thinking about finding the right therapist, and I am studying to be one lol. To have to start completely over with a new therapist could be very daunting.
There is a good compromising middle ground that you should consider. Take your son without the rest of the family to the old therapist, and let him explain how he is feeling about meeting with him or her. Then let the therapist explain their side of things. From there make a decision if to continue with the same one or move on.
Lastly, if what he says is true you should report this therapist. Coaxing bullying and attack of one of the children is against our values and ethics.
NTJ. But you may want to get more answers about what is going on. From the little info given here, it sounds like a possible situation where adult protection services have been called in. Your grandfather has to be moved out and your uncle is now financially responsible. He can't do both of them so as the only child you automatically would be looked up on for taking over those responsibilities. Your mother might have either an SMI or SPMI. Until you officially (legally) deny a role then it limits the help your mother can receive or really slow down the process. Of course all of this is conjecture, but you should look into it.
Honestly you are all some level of jerk. We don't know his family's side of the story to judge how jerky they are. They still are jerks for changing the rules of the game without informing you. Your husband is a jerk for two reasons. First, he didn't make any effort to translate for you when it was obvious they weren't going to speak any English. Then for not confronting the family for the change in rules, and getting it out the total story.
Finally, you are a jerk for not making any effort to learn the language after all these years. You aren't likely to become fluent, and might still need help with translation but can make an attempt to do better. We don't know your whole story here either where there might be other things that made you blow up and walk out like a history of racist actions from the family or feeling of alienation.
AITJ For Only Getting My Nephew One Gift?
2 years ago
NTJ. This sounds like the age old problem of what to do when siblings have a difference in number of children and really financial obligations. Setting a spending amount per child is good. Talk about any preferences over one larger priced items over smaller but more abundant in numbers. So one child doesn't have to sit through other kids opening 5 to their 1.
Kids don't understand value of items financially or know the comparison of costs. They see 1 to many. That doesn't make them selfish (young children tend to be selfish due to their stage of development) or any other nasty names people are giving the child. It's the mother/grandmother who made it about the financial cost. Kids also aren't likely to understand 1 Christmas celebration to 2 of them and that's why there is a difference in how many presents to open. Some families figure this out by giving more from immediate family at one celebration where less is likely to be given by other family members due to numbers versus a celebration where more might be given out. More isn't spent it's just distributing it differently.
It is up to the adults to help teach the skills of understanding these things.
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