mappster
Metaspoon User

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Years ago, I had children knocking on my door wanting to play with my children in the early hours of the morning. I set a rule in place that saved my sanity. We had visiting hours. No guest until the afternoon. After 12. My kids understood. One day my oldest son answered the door. He greeted his friend with, "You know guests are not allowed at my house until after 12. See you later." The kid nodded and walked away. The rest of the neighbor kids understood how it worked and we didn't have any problems. Simple solution.
You probably have an auditory processing issue that wasn't caught when you were a child. It's just as you said. It takes your brain a while the process the Information. Unfortunately, your partner is set in her ways. I don't think she understands your issue. You can go to an audiologist to get checked out, but is she willing to understand you have a real issue?
NTJ!! To you, she IS family. This does not make you a jerk. She is your family of the heart. She has shown you love all these years. If you want to continue the relationship, you need to explain your feeling to your SO. Don't cut someone out of your life to make some else happy.
Read the first part of your last sentence. NTJ! Your family has spent years taking advantage of you. I'm so sorry they can't see what you've already done for your family. Don't do it.
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