kbeaudway
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Nah. She didn't really say that. She made it sound like she was trying to take a pass at all the wedding events, not contribute to any of them financially, but still be a bridesmaid. She needed to take a step back and say, "This is the position I'm in and what I can do. I understand that's not what you're looking for in your bridesmaids. I really want to help celebrate your wedding, but I can't meet your needs as a bridesmaid, so I think it would be best for both of us if I just be a guest." That conversation didn't take place. It was just her saying no to all the bridesmaid things. Don't get me wrong - I didn't say YTA. Fully acknowledge the bride is an AH here too. But it's important for bridemaids to understand that they'll be expected to do some work and pay some expenses. If you can't do that, then politely say so up front, and maybe offer to support their wedding in another way (e.g. - JUST make the cake).
NTA. Kids aren't pancakes. If you screw it up, you don't just get to toss it out and make another.
You did nothing wrong. Lap swimming and competitive swimming are not the same thing. And your right, you would have noticed hitting the lane rope. I'm a decent swimmer, but I tried lap swimming on no sleep once (do not recommend), and started going a little wonky. I think I hit the lane separater twice. It was very jarring and very obvious. If there's one thing you learn about gym pools, it's that you have to share the lanes!
However a child comes into your family, it's your child. Full stop. You have (essentially) adopted him. You are his father. Full stop. If your family can't accept your child, they don't accept you.
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