jeni2
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I would reply to the manager and saying "I am all for being a team player, which is why I have coveted for Susieq on short notice 6 times in the last 2 months. You should talk to her about her availability so she is not scheduled when she is not available and I will cover when given proper notice and I am available. I am not available tonight.". This is a job for fun money, if it is a hassle, there are other restaurants.
Sorry but the first time the brother came into your room should have been when you threw him out, and not in 3 days. The brother is asserting control over your house, tell him and mil to f off and never speak of your husband to you again because they have disrespected his widow and HER home.
You should pay rent to your patents because you live there and work, but it should not be the whole check. I would say you should give them 1/3 of your paycheck, and then save ever penny you can to move out soon.
Don't listen to people saying if she was really your friend you should pump for the baby and drive by yourself basically creating a 10 hour work day for yourself. That means a new mom is separated from their newborn and driving while stressed and exhausted all for an hour wedding, no that is just crazy. Dont do it. If she is really your friend. she will understand, if she does not she was never a friend at all.
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