bejo
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He's your EX for a reason. You became friends again after his father's funeral sounds like he manipulated you into feeling sorry for him. Skinny girl probably dumped him and he's looking to warm his bed until something better comes along.
The reason his ex's family didn't like him is that he's an abusive, controlling jerk. "This isn't what we agreed to" translates as "You're not doing what I told you to do."
Unless he's making your house payments, it quit being his room when he moved out. I can see making it his room still while he's in college, but when he establishes his own home it's done.
He'll leave it up to the kids if they want to come back? No. It's dangerous to allow them out of the country to begin with.
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