Lilybell24
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I think your dad is part of the problem here. Trying to guilt you to invite her. He should be talking to her about her part in this (all of it). I don't know how far off this wedding is but unless she comes to you and you two discuss your issues like why she ghosted you when your child was born and why you were excluded from her child's b'day. Don't invite her unless the air is cleared before your wedding
Your family comes first. They had 5 months to move. They need to contact social services and do something for themselves. They will not move out until you are forced to kick them out. Tell them a firm NO. Do not let them think for a minute you are their back up plan. Truthfully you are their plans but this will get very ugly if you allow them to move in. Hopefully your wife is by your side on this. Your son deserves to feel safe in his own home. Your SIL needs counseling
Oh my gosh, I was in a similar situation where we had been together 14 years, we both worked, our children were grown when we met. We bought the house but it was in his name only. Our money was not shared but we split the bills. I refused to make the house payment unless my name was added or if we got married ( no common law in Missouri) Stand your ground, either your name goes on everything or you get married. I gave him an ultimatum but he didn't believe I could do it . I proved him wrong. Problem was we loved each other very much. Now we have our own houses and still see each other. He has told me many times how sorry he was and he should have married me. You need to stand up for yourself. You will have nothing. You contribute all your time and energy and love in this relationship and should be compensated. He could not be where he is today if not for your behind the scenes. Insist you get married or your name be put on everything. I have a bad feeling that you will lose everything. Talk to a lawyer Consultation is free. Hopefully they can explain how dire your situation is