Everyone has a funny story to share when they’re out drinking with friends, catching up, and remembering the things they used to do when they were younger. Which stories are the best, you may ask? If you ask me, the ones shared below would make for some great conversations!
Check out 23 former college students share the bizarre ways in which they, or people they know, managed to get expelled from school.
23. I fired multiple teachers…
“Sent emails to my teachers that I didn’t like from the principal’s email address saying they were fired.” – Deborah_Rodriguez
22. Privacy, please!
“Knew this one dude that was caught m**********g multiple times in a utility closet. “ – Throwawaycarne
21. Air horns were the end of me
“I chased a teacher with an air horn at the end of lunchtime. Followed him into the toilet and let the air horn rip. He pissed all over himself. That was my 10th suspension and my final.” – bootychild
20. All she wanted was a new security guard
“A friend of mine was expelled because she created a Facebook group called ‘Does anyone else hate our library’s security guard?’ which got to 10,000 members in under a week. This then made the local news. A month later they told my friend she could come back but that she was banned from all social media. – X0AN
19. Guaranteed to fail…and get expelled
“Not me, but a kid in my college was expelled for taking a giant d***o in during some oral presentation, slamming it on some student’s table and telling the class to screw themselves.” – toadfan64
18. He was caught soliciting to the wrong guy…
“My drug-dealing and drug-addicted friend thought it was a great idea to send an email to the principal trying to sell him h****n.” – Reddit user
17. I was aggressive by nature…
“Punched holes in the walls while drunk.. yep I was stupid.” – Reddit user
16. I just had really bad timing
“I peed onto a rival fraternity’s back porch. The lights were off at their house, so I didn’t know they were all inside having a movie night. They all saw.” – Jermine1269
15. The flying couch on fire
“My Master Sergeant was kicked out of college for throwing a flaming couch through the dorm window. He tried to argue to the dean that he was just saving lives, but since he was the one who lit it on fire, it didn’t buy him much sympathy.” – CatPawSoup
14. Unwanted goods and services
“I went to a private Christian University, and I have a friend who got expelled for supposedly exorcizing a demon out of someone in the middle of a wide-open courtyard.” – mattelias44
13. Explosives (of any kind) are never allowed, I should have known that
“I shot a firework out of my butt in a campus-owned house.” – unclebud777
12. They didn’t make it clear in the syllabus
“Apparently, you can get kicked out for not showing up to class and failing everything. Who knew?!” – Reddit user
11. All I did was go on a date!
“For being off campus with a member of the opposite s*x without proper supervision. No, seriously.” – Fainer
10. I caused (a serious) commotion
“I got expelled in 2004 for inciting a riot.” – n*****s
9. He had way too much coke, and it wasn’t the pop…
“I knew a guy who got expelled from an Ivy League for getting caught with too much c*****e. He works at California Pizza Kitchen now.” – Dont_be_stinky
8. I became the ice cream man
“I was expelled from all college residences for stumbling home from the pub, finding an unlocked door in the food hall, taking three 10-liter tubs of ice cream and going around on a bike blasting Greensleeves pretending to be an ice-cream truck at 2 am.” – Music_Is_Crap
7. I plagiarized, and it wasn’t even for an assignment!
“Plagiarizing a two-paragraph apology letter I was forced to write, expressing why I was sorry about drinking alcohol in the dorms.” – brooce_canterbury
6. All he cared about was League of Legends
“I had a friend who skipped all classes and failed everything because all he wanted to do was play LoL.” – A-trusty-pinecone
5. The Dean cheated on his wife, but I got expelled…
“I got expelled when I caught the Dean giving a co-ed a mustache ride and [recorded] it, then sent the video to his wife. The university bylaws forbid video recording in the administrative office and used that as an excuse to expel me. Fortunately, my parents are rich and we lawyered up and the university settled. Made a ton of money off it and started my own business.” – JAPaulson
4. Stealing isn’t right, I learned it the hard way
“Around my college, we have these weird traffic cones. About 10:00, almost every Friday, they come to life and say “steal me” when your drunk a*s stumbles past them.” – HtMB_Sky
3. They judged my character and kicked me out
“My dad teaches at a Christian college. I was forced to attend because hey, free tuition. I lasted one year then got kicked out for not being ‘godly’ enough.” – TheBakercist
2. I was just mining the lab
“Installing bitcoin miners on all the computers in a video editing lab.” – jzsean
1. I gave the professor a piece of my mind
“Called the professor who was several years younger than me a little s***head while in class, for cracking a joke about why I was coming back to college after so long (I was in the military serving in Afghanistan). But I won the appeal…
EDIT: To give a little backstory to the situation, we were a*signed a group project, of which I was older than everyone by nearly ten years. We got to a part where we were discussing technology, and the kids in my group were snickering about how I didn’t have a cell phone until my senior year of high school, and describing the old Nokias. It was in good fun and I was actually enjoying acting like an old-timer ( I was around 30).
The Professor heard the laughing and came to see what it was all about. One of the girls repeated the conversation, and he made a comment along the lines of “I guess he joined the military because he couldn’t make it into college the first time around.” Now mind you, I WAS in college before I went into the military. I left for real reasons. I come from a very poor town and had no parents to pay for my college. I knew that if I joined and did my four years, I would get my GI bill, which would prevent me from going into massive student loan debt. This was also not long after 9/11, so I was also feeling very patriotic and wanted to serve my country. Of course, after I got out, I went straight to work in another career field, and it took some time for me to go back to school.” – JasonOnTheBeach
